"If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals." - Sirius Black
all this looks promising. i notice your attention to detail. its very good. i'm looking forward to the next chapter!
Author's Response: Hey, thanks!
this story seems very promising. im very interested to see where it goes. for example, will allen's/angela's magical instability result in unusual powers? will he/she take an interest in girls, boys, or perhaps both?
there are some points that i disagree with, however (but please keep in mind that i intend all my criticisms to be constructive, and i realize that this is your story, not mine). for example, there is no way in hell that a 13 year old boy could be perfectly calm about being changed into an 11 year old girl. i am an 18 year old male, and although i have some feminine qualities, i would certainly be flipping out for a bare minimum of about a day.
also, the ending struck me as somewhat rushed. i doubt he/she would fall asleep quickly after an unexpected magical sex-change. he/she would probably not get a wink of sleep, trying to wrap his/her brain around what had just happened. however, i concede the fact that allen has already had a presumably wacked-out life until this point, and this may be a smaller issue to him than it would be to someone else. another possibility is that he is so desperate to escape his previous existence up to this point that he's willing to accept whatever he has to. but this is all speculation on my part, and i know that this is your story and you have your own reasons for writing what you do.
when all is said and done, i think this will be an awesome story, and i really look forward to reading the rest of it.
Author's Response: Thanks a lot for the critique. I\'ll keep that in mind for the final version.
Author's Response: Like I said in a previous response, the part about him reacting too calmly to his gender being changed has been revised. Also, how he falls asleep is different now, too.
again, i enjoyed this. i cant wait for the next chapter. i must commend you on your writing skill. also, the bit with the wand was very interesting. we who happen to know the backstory know that muggleborns have their powers because they have at least one witch or wizard in their distant ancestry. i wonder if an ancestor may have been a veela, given your description of barbara rongwood, and angela's wand's core. i look forward to the rest of the story!
Author's Response: Thank you for your praise. I will be releasing the third chapter soon, so be patient.
Author's Response: The third chapter is now out.
that thing with the ear is pretty cool. do you mind if i use that in my story? i don't want him to scare one of the kids he comes in contact with.
great story, by the way. sorry i cant be more helpful than that, but i cant really think of anything right now.
Author's Response: By all means use it. My attorney will send you the release forms and you can send the fee in monthly installments. Just kidding. Thanks for the comment.
I WANT MORE!!!
Author's Response: YOU\'LL GET MORE!! I\'m not sure when, but it will be SOON!!! Actually, due to my finishing and polishing my second novel for Amazon\'s Breakthrough Novel Award, I\'m not done with Chapter 8 yet. With that project aside, however, I should be able to finish and submit it pretty soon.
i really liked this. i can't wait for the next one. also, i think you ended it at just the right moment. i look forward to the rest of it.
Author's Response: Thank you. I will try to post more as soon as possible :)
oh my god, i loved this! this is one of the best pieces of writing i've had the pleasure of reading in a long time. everything fit so well together. it was spectacular. the humor, the sorrow, all of it. i'll be sure to keep an eye out for any future fics you write.
Author's Response: Thanks :-) I\'m so pleased that you all have enjoyed it so much!
this was brilliant! i was pleasantly surprised that lily and severus shared a kiss like that, because most other fics involving their parting is much colder, with lily basically telling snape where to shove his apologies and then turning her back on him. and the way you tied the two scenes together was very good. i feel too that snape must have been thinking of lily, and trying to trust dumbledore, when he spoke the curse on the tower. once again, this was great. keep up the good work!
this story is great, and this chapter was just too funny. "do you have sisters," honestly. keep up the good work!
wow, this is really great. you had some brilliant ideas here. you seem to be very talented as a writer. i cant wait till the next chapter is validated, and im looking forward to seeing where this goes.
i think at the very least, hermione will be okay with lily and scorpius, and possibly harry. i don't know, though, this is your story, after all.
and a funny thing: when writing my own fanfic, i had the same idea with the enchanted book. i wanted a way for two of my characters to be able to interact privately in hogwarts, cause its kinda hard to send an owl in the middle of class, and i thought of the mirrors that james and sirius used as marauders in detentions. then i thought of how we muggles use email and instant messaging and texting, and i wanted a way to incorporate that type of communication in the wizarding world. so i thought of a hard bound book enchanted to share messages and it never runs out of pages (like how the test papers are just a single piece that you just keep turning over and over again) so you can use it your whole life and never have to get a new, empty book. and you could somehow erase messages if you didn't want to keep them, just like an email inbox, where you can delete old messages. (in my story, a student created just one pair for his own personal use with his best friend. im sure if someone like george had made it to be sold, he would make it so you eventually had to buy a new one, so he could keep making money.)
but it seems you got to the idea first. great minds think alike, i suppose. i just wanted to let you know that if i ever put up the fic im writing, not to think im stealing your idea. but technically, you published the idea first, so if you would rather i didn't use the book idea, im sure i can figure something else out. but regardless, feel free to use any ideas i just gave you. i dont know how developed your ideas about the book are, but if you want to use any part of what i just described with my ideas, please feel free.
i would like your thoughts on the issue, and if you choose to give it, you permission to use the book idea.
Author's Response: I don\'t mind at all if you use the idea of the book thing. I didn\'t think it was that oringanal of an idea. In my head in the book the notes can be erased but only so nobody could read it. Once a spot in the book had been used it looses its charm and is just like normal partchment. That way you can still have use out of the book but you have to continue buying new ones if you want to continue to use the enchantment. Thanks for the wonderful review and I look forward to reading your fic one day when you post it so I can see how you use the book idea.
wow. this is some powerful stuff. you know, i generally thought that people who cut themselves are crazy or attention-seekers or something like that, but i'm not entirely sure now. this really broadened my perspective on things, i think. i still dont think its a healthy thing to do, but i dont think i'll be judging anyone anymore. as for me, however, i find that writing really helps get some things out, and when i read my stuff over again later, i find it charged with emotion, proving that i wasn't numb.
Author's Response: Thank you so much! You know, I didn\'t think I would ever be answering reviews for this story. It took me seven tries to get it up! I\'m still mentally *squeeee!!!!!!*ing. Yeah, I used to think the same thing about cutters, but I had a friend who did it, and she\'s actually very normal, aside from being overly random and spazzy sometimes. But thanks for the review. *huggles* ~megan~
oh, i almost forgot. you write very well. the way you portrayed everything was so realistic. the attention to detail was very good. and sorry about this review being in 2 pieces, its just that the story gave me a bit to think about. and while i dont typically like the dark stuff that this story entails, i find myself looking forward to the rest of it.
Author's Response: Tehee, hello again. And thank you ;-) ~megan~
very good. it was quite moving, but i laughed, too. yes, ron really is an idiot, but thats what makes him such a likeable character, i suppose.
i like this story. you picked a very good time period to write about, too, because it's open to alot of original material. you're writing style is very good, too. i look forward to the next chapter.
very funny. it doesn't seem like something hermione would do, but at the same time i can imagine her doing something like that. and the brutal cheekiness was marvelous.
Author's Response: She is a very good little girl, and I really tried to take that into account by giving her ample reason on this particular day to “loose it.” I also tried to imagine the way in which she would snap as most fitting to her character and intelligence, and in defense of this story, she *did* slap Draco, so she is capable of coming unglued, however rarely. Thank-you for your feedback!
very funny. i love this story already, and i really like your writing style. i also like the pace that things are happening. they're not falling madly in love with each other right off the bat and turning the story into a fluffy snogfest, and on the other hand, they're not taking 15 chapters before anything happens. i think you're doing a fine job. keep it up!
Author's Response: Thanks! Unfortunately, the fictional part of this fanfic is quite fluffy. Ah, well. Hope you continue reading this story, and thanks for the review!
ooh, i get the first review. anyway, this was brilliant. i liked how you placed scorpius in gryffindor. i had a feeling he would go there too. and that bit how james would have been in slytherin, that was interesting. pretty cool, really. and when albus snorted at scorpius's name. a tiny detail, but one that seems likely to happen, all things considered, but no one else i've read seemed to think of it. i remember how ron snorted at draco's name.
yes, this was a very good piece. i think it would be cool if you were to continue this story.
Author's Response: Someone had to snort at Scorpius\' name. I know I did. Thanks for reading and reviewing. I am really glad I\'m getting a positve response to this story.
emma x x x
good stuff. i have to nitpick, however. i know a bit about agriculture and botany, so i noticed a little problem. you wrote that the plants in longbottom's office receive continual sunlight. this is not healthy for a plant. it is similar to depriving an animal of sleep. during the day is when a plant makes energy n the form of sugars, but at night is when they grow. continual sunlight would result in a dehydrated plant (from the high mount of sugar, and the heat from the sunlight) with severely stunted growth. it would die rather quickly. and longbottom would know this. it would be wiser to have him simply reproduce the charm in the great hall that allows the sky to be viewed.
but i dont mean to be negative. this is a great story, and i love it. im just a little disappointed that you took so long to update! i really look forward to the next chapter. i want to see how the malfoy family reacts. i could picture lucius sending a howler, perhaps. keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Well, first of all, you may have singlehandedly rescued my houseplants (we had a grow light for them at night) As for Neville, I\"ll rewrite when time permits to make it like the Great Hall, but always a sunny day (but a normal night). Until then, I\'ll just hide behind the old stand-by of \"Umm, well you see, THOSE were Neville\'s magical plants that oddly enough love constant sunlight... his non-weird plants are in the greenhouses.\" I\'m glad you enjoy it so far and I will try to update as often as time permits. Thanks for the review (my plants say \'thanks\' too!)
a most wonderful tale, but i have one issue: in previous chapters, you referred to hermione's "incisors." the incisors are the front teeth, whereas the canines are the pointy ones that should elongate. behind them are the bicuspids, which may also get long and pointy, depending on which vampire movie you're watching.
but yeah, i enjoy this story. can't wait for more! and i think i might know why they're going to transylvania.
Author's Response: Oh, I feel so stupid! *head desk* Thank you for informing me! Glad you like it though.
very good! it seems as though you are telling people to leave dumbledore and jk rowling alone, in light of the recent confirmation of our favorite headmaster's sexuality. but you wrote "I past it all to Harry" when it should have been "passed." but never mind that, i'm just a little nitpicky. well done!
Author's Response: Blasted spell checker done me in again, LOL! Thank you!