Hello my darling visitors :) Yes, this is the same QueenHal who was crazy enough to take on the job of redesigning MuggleNet Fan Fiction for MNFF-2. I'm also the same QueenHal who runs the Bannermakers Association at the forums.
But as much as I love to design and make pretty pictures... I also love to write. Here you will find the cozy little corner of Haley. Er, I mean - here are the stories I've authored. I'm rather proud of everything I've posted here--but I know that they wouldn't even be here if it weren't for my darling SPEWers. How I love those crazy kids.
Lanette and her Grandmother
Spirits of the Storm - Ch. 4
I agree with Barrufio, although I think it does have potential. I just don't visualize the characters when I hear the dialogue... Everything seems choppy and yes, casual. Spruce your dialogue up a bit and this fic could really go somewhere!
Completely.... astounding. I, also, read the entire story (well, novel really) on the Red Hen site, and I cannot get over it. This has been the first fiction I've read that has explored Voldemort's plan so expertly. I won't be suprised if I'm actually let down by JKR's explanations for everything after reading Lilly's theory. I love what you did with Draco and Snape. Although I despise the characters in Cannon, I've found your portrayal of them to be entrancing, but still believable. I also must add that I loved the fact that Hermione had such a central roll, because, as others have said, it's easy to relate to her... and also refreshing getting to see the girl's side of things (with both Hermione and Lilly). I think that everything you did with the story was entirely interesting and well researched. Much of it got me really thinking. Thank you so much for a brilliant read.
Author's Response: Thank you for your thoughtful review. I'm so glad you saw and enjoyed the Red Hen version. I think we're all waiting anxiously to see what JKR comes up with. I had very mixed feelings about OOTP, and that's why I'm waiting for HBP to come out before I write anything new. And yes, I particularly wanted to do something with girls (and not the same old romances) because JKR doesn't seem to care about her female characters as much as the males. Yes, we have Hermione to identify with, but we really don't know all that much about her, and I hope that JKR explores more of her unpleasant traits (her arrogance, her social insensitivity, and her self-righteousness), to give her some moments of self-awareness and growth. And her female villains! Talk about cardboard characters! Snape is given a backstory, Voldemort is given a backstory, but Umbridge and Bellatrix are just bad, bad, bad and horrible. I'd like to see a story about Bellatrix being under Imperius all these years! Anyway, that's all in the future. Thanks so much for reading, and better yet, thinking while you read!
I just thought I needed to review again. Not for any particular reason, because I have already poured my heart out on how much I love this story.... but I just don't understand how it has gone so unnoticed in the MNFF world. It is so brilliant, such quality, and you don't have nearly enough fans. *grumbles*
Fantastic. Spent the last couple hours catching up on all the chapters... enthralled. I love how real you make these characters. Especially the boys. It's also nice to see all our favorite characters from cannon go back in time a bit. The scene in the ally was brilliant, by the way. You have amazingly clever ideas. You keep me guessing and suprised. I also love the constant action! Never a dull moment. The only thing I could ask for is to shape Lilly's character a bit more. At the moment, she seems a bit flat. There is so much story to her! So much that needs to be told to explain the woman-who would-die-to-save-her-son. Other than that, completely amazing! I can't wait for more.
Author's Response: Ug. I totally agree with you. I was writing the new chapter and thought....wow. I am a girl yet I can write the guys with ease and rarely write the girl. So I decided to change it a bit. So, Lily's a bit bigger in the next chapter, and I really need to focus more on bringing her in. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!! I love reviews that actually help me write the rest of the story :) :)
Quite interesting... ill be watching for more
Chills. You're story gave me chills. What a brilliant bit of writing.... Thank you.
Interesting concept.... we need more from the girl-who-no-one-notices. I'll be watching for more.
Author's Response: =D Thanks!! The new chapter should be up soon, if they approve it! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
I'm enjoying it so far, for sure. But I agree with the comment about the exclamation points. Everytime you put one there, the little voice in my head goes up! and now... my head is spinning. Tone down the pointies and you've got a great fic going.
Author's Response: Sooo sorry about the 'spinning' :) I have suppressed nearly 20 exclamation points from Chapter 2. I must be really "tensed" when I wrote this chapter *lol*... Thanks for reviewing!
Oh what a suprise! I mean it always made sense to me that Harry would choose the path of the Auror.... I actually have never thought he would be anything else. Until now. He would be an excellent teacher, you're right. Hmmm... a penny for my thoughts. I like the little cliffy at the end there as well.
What a way to celebrate the birthday of Harry Potter. I'm just sitting here... kinda in awe. Kinda? What am I talking about.... that was beyond awe-inspiring. What an ending! You really, really made it work. What I just read was among the very, very, very best final battle scene I've ever read. It struck many emotions in me... and honestly, I was rather angry at first at Harry for not being able to kill him outright. But man, when the true impact of what he had done hit me... I just took a moment to be in complete bow-down mode to you.
And then you had me thinking Voldemort killed Harry, because the line after made me think it was the end. I sat there with tears running down my face for a full minute before I realized there was more. Even as I continued reading I was just shaking... and then Dumbledore's words to Harry just had me sobbing all over again. The “blood debt”... finally came together. And you just did justice to the entire series.
Jenna H. Malfoy.... you just made me fall in love with you all over again.
Thank you for an amazing ride. I'm proud to call you my friend.
Lmao. I got so excited to submit the review that I forgot to add my one little bit of concrit... which was that I would have liked to see more about Godric's Hollow in there. You have this amazing battle taking place at this property... and I think it would have been incredibly effective if you included them stumbling over ashy belongings and the strange grounds of the Potter family and such. Also, there was no resolution with his parents really... no Harry visiting their graves. I think I would have liked to see that somewhere.
However, none of this was really needed, because you did an outstanding job. I just thought it might add a bit of something.
I love you.
Some answers! Finally! *squeee* They do make sense too... And poor little Miss Weasley.. Thanks for another wonderful chapter, Im so proud of you - busting all these chapters out.
Yay first reviewer! What an honor ;) I guess this means I owe you a present. What to make...what to make.
Anyway, loved it as usual. Went by too fast. My only complaint really ;) Tension in Paradise I see with Ron and Hermione. I can't say I'm too sad about it. A relationship without angst and heartbreak isn't that interesting after a while. Spicing it up with some harsh words are just what it needed. I miss Katie, when does she come back in the picture? And what happened to the Journals? Hopefully we'll see them soon. And more of Siobhan please.
Now the ending! That was fun. What an interesting twist. Snape as Harry's champion? That would explain a lot...
As always, looking forward to more.
Author's Response: The journal reappears in chapter 20 ;) Just assume that Harry & Katie are keeping in touch, and I find it tedious to include all their writings.
We'll see Katie again in November (specifically Chapters 24 & 25), and then again at Christmas.
Thanks for the review, your awesomeness :)
What a bleak and beautiful chapter. It was full of an uneasiness that spread from the characters to my very heart. Something is going to happen. Very, very soon.
“I was wondering why McGonagall insisted on having us Transfigure those books into vicious birds… I guess to put us on the defensive.”
“Those were quail, Ron,” Hermione said with a small snort.
This was a wonderful little bit of humour to give us some comic relief. Just imagining quail attacking Ron sends giggles through my lips.
His dreams were cloudy and obscured, and when he woke up in the darkness with a pounding headache, he could not remember a single detail from the wanderings of his unconscious.
Lovely line here. And at the same time, very frightening. It's as if these dreams are telling him something, something that he can't get to...
And so, pulling on his trainers, Harry donned a cloak for warmth and left his dormitory to travel downwards through the castle and out the Entrance Hall onto the grounds that were just meeting dawn.
I'd change a couple things about this sentence. First, I'd put “after pulling on his trainers”, because it sounds like he's pulling on his trainers and donning a cloak at the same time, which physically would be very confusing. The last part of the sentence is pretty, but a little wordy, especially because the sentence is already very long. Maybe: “....Harry donned a cloak for warmth and descended through the castle to meet the Hogwarts grounds basked in the murky light of dawn.” or something...
As stagnant and icy as the waters of their daily life might seem, the other side could drop a stone at any moment, disrupting the closest thing to calm they could grab hold of, sending ripples of terror through them all... And Harry was growing weary.
Beautiful last line. What a wonderful metaphor... just lovely. And chilling. But I can't help to think... maybe Harry just needs a little sex. Did I say that!? *runs away*
Fabulous. Just fabulous. I spent all of the night engrossed in your Year Six fic, and then this one. You have amazing talent, and I do believe that out of all my favorite post Ootp fics (and I have many) yours are the most top notch of them all. I really like what you've done with Katie, and the secret engagement just makes my heart flutter. Also, although many many people write fics pairing Ron and Hermione, I find yours the most believable and in character. You have the perfect balance of mystery, humour, and drama. Thank you for your stories. You live up to JKR's talent.
Author's Response: Thank you very much, for taking the time to leave such a lovely review. I hope you continue to enjoy the story. :)
You need to make these chapters longer, missy! I always read through them way too quickly. The mention of Ginny cast an interesting shadow over the meeting between the two lovebirds... her presence will always be felt. I wonder if Katie even felt a little jealous that Harry started off their date with the mention of her? And these journals... scare me a bit. They remind me frightfully of Riddle's diary. What if it somehow distorts their thoughts.... or like someone below said, what if someone else is watching them? That could be such an interesting storyline. AHH! Anyway, loved the Alias reference (Best show possibly ever). And I just might make you a new little graphic soon.... Maybe of Siobhan, if I can get a good picture of her in my mind. Thanks for a wonderful read!
Author's Response: I make them as long as they need be ;) I like your comment concerning Ginny's presence - though Katie isn't jealous of Ginny (anymore...). She played Quidditch alongside her for two years, and is very saddened by the loss. The journals, yes the journals. They're fun aren't they. I'm keeping my lips zipped on that one, which doesn't even mean there's anything more to them. I just like to see you all squirm. *evil laughter* ALIAS = best. show. ever. Oh, and I would love a Siobhan graphic. I actually have a banner with her on it for another fic I'm working on. Check out my other account 'TheVault' to see it. :)
Another amazing chapter... your work thrills me again and again. I'm so glad you loved my "cover" for this story!! You really deserved it... besides the fact I had so much fun making it :)
Author's Response: Thanks for reading, and reviewing - and thank you again for the great 'cover', it's awesome ;)
It worked, Jenna! After so much toiling and boiling, it really came off well. :) The Wormtail confrontation was perfect – he’s such a disgusting little rat, eh? I was very happy to see the debt fulfilled, and in such a way that it really mattered. This is something Harry longs for, and only Wormtail can give it to him. Nice job. OH wait!! I just got something… “Blood Debt”. Is this particular debt what your story title refers to? Ooo…
The Siobhan-Harry interaction is priceless and wonderful as usual. You know how I feel about Katie, so I won’t say anything on that subject. All I will say is that every encounter with Siobhan is completely refreshing. It puts some angst back into Harry’s personal life. *smirks* Yeah, yeah, don’t give me that look.
“I should hope ‘with me’,” Katie teased, before raising her eyebrow at him in mock-suspicion. “Unless you’re planning on running off with Siobhan?”
And my response to that wonderful line is… “Muhahahaha!” Siobhan, Siobhan, Siobhan. I was completely giddy when they ran across eachother at the Vault. To think that this itty bitty subplot stemmed from one of my heated Harry/Siobhan rants. I need to go back and read the other side now (it’s even more fun!).
A couple nitpicks:
“And you are you here to see today, Mr Potter?” - the first you should be “who”, I think.
“..thought I’d very much like to, I don’t have time for things like that.” - “thought” should be “though”, unless I’m reading it wrong and you mean that Harry thought he would feel like that, but he doesn’t.
I have no other criticisms to make. It flowed nicely, had a good balance between high-tension and lightheartedness. My absolute favorite line:
“And sometimes that matters more than the lack of a good reason,” Harry said resolutely. “Give your dad the same benefit of your love.”
It just reminded me all over again of why I love your Harry so much. Dear, dear Harry. I cannot believe that this tale is almost complete. We’ve been with you 102 chapters, now, and as *ahem* Captain and Founder of The Cult, I take pride in saying that I will stick with you the rest of the way. (Even if Harry and Siobhan don’t end up running off to somewhere exotic together.)
I love you Jenna. Rock on with your Blood Debt-yness.
Author's Response: I personally thought the Wormtail bit was lacking - but if you say it worked, then so be it! ;D
As for the Blood Debt... well... it seems an awfully small part of the story for it to earn a place in the title, don't you think? *snickers evilly* At least now I have your attention.
As I already said, I love that line from Harry, too. Please direct praise to Mr Potter, it had nothing to do with me ;) And silly me for giving The Cult it's H/S interaction. Siobhan really just takes control, I don't know what to do with her anymore. And I hope to get around to fixing the nitpicks [Anna was rushing me... *growl*], even though I admittedly never do :(
Thanks, Haley :D!
Oh Jenna, after a month of not reading Blood Debt, I was totally spoiled by the past few chapters. Your writing is just as incredible as ever. Flawless, really. Your story just draws me in and doesn't let go. I love Siobhan more than ever, and the Ron thing I admit suprised me a bit. But now that it's settled in, I'm very excited. Ron needs some happiness! Liam is dreamy. Hermione showing up to the door in her blue and red pajamas.... fabulous. Poor dear. I'm very interested in this Granian creature. How will she play into the story? Right now, I'm visualizing a romantic flight horsetop over all of England... Harry and Siobhan.... ahem, I mean Katie of course :-D
Author's Response: Thank you so much ;) Hermione's little pajama incident was actually inspired by a little story my favourite Swede told me - so it wasn't purely my invention. I just incoroporated it well.
Liam might be dreamy, but he doesn't like people. Sorry.
Clarimonde will be important -- but I don't think romantic horsetop flights are safe, what with Voldemort and all ;) Though, you certainly bring out the H/S shipper in me... *sigh*
You're up to your usual standards of brilliancy! I know I need to give you a good long review, but I'm still recovering from your shocking plot twist! What a fantastic theory... Looking forward to the halloween ball ;)