Penname: lmcayton [Contact]
Real name: lauren marie cayton
Member Since: 05/30/07
Website: roadrunner.com
Beta-reader: No
Status: Member
Bio:
Well, I'm a 15 year old Ohioan who has way too much time on her hands, and Obsessive Harry Potter disorder. I also like Lurlene McDaniel and am getting ready to read the Twilight series. Okay, the Buckeyes and Bengals RULE!! Also, as you can plainly tell from the avatar, I support organ and tissue donation, my grandfather is alive because of it. Hate smoking. That's never gonna change because i refuse to die from Emphysema, like so many of my ancestors.I can't stand drinking and driving, or drugs, period. I hate what happens when people do these things. My profile is long so please be patient and read. ;) I am the middle of five children, the oldest of which(brother) has three daughters with another little boy on the way.I'm a high school sophomore, though you don't get to know where. :P. I'm short (like5'2") normal weight, and an animal lover. I'm the weirdest one in my little group of friends. This is saying something, trust me. :) I like to read, write fanfiction(duh), get on the computer, listen to music, and sleep. Unfortunately, neither Sarah nor I recently have had much time to write... Sarah b/c of her majorly competitive show choir.. me because of all the advanced classes I am taking... stupid AP US history. :P ~Lauren
Yes, apologies.... seriously though, my choir is really busy. But Lauren has another account on fanfiction.net- miss sophie potter.... she doesn't update as much as she should, but who has the time? Anyway, I might be borrowing that account to write a songfic sometime soon. Anyone heard of Michael Bubleī? Well, we have homework to do and finals to study for...
~Sarah

()_(/)
(='.'=) This is Bunny. Help Bunny achieve World Domination by copying this into your profile
(")_(")

If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever run up the 'down' escalator or vice versa, copy and paste this into our profile.

If there are times where you annoy people just for the fun of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you believe that over half of all you say/write/think doesn't come out right and is complete stupidity, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you support Sirius/Remus 100 Percent, copy this into your profile!

If you thinkSnape is GOOD, copy this into your profile.

If you are a Jack Sparrow fan, copy this into your profile.

If you hate Paris Hilton, copy this into your profile.

If you are tired of Harry/Hermione shippers, copy this into your profile.

I AM IN SIRIUS DENIAL! SIRIUS IS NOT DEAD! AND I WILL NOT LET YOU SAY OTHERWISE! If you too are in Sirius denial then copy and paste this into your profile. Because Denial is not just a river in Egypt!

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If you think that Michael Jackson is a freak, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you support organ and tissue donation, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you think that people should stop being so hypocritical and get on with their live, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you think that people should stop saying Barack Obama is a terrorist because of his middle name, copy and paste this into your profile!

I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear I am the man who fears that I will never be able to be myself, to be free of this secret because I wont risk loosing my family and friends.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the woman who died when the EMTs stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didnt have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I dont believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends im a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.
I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to teach me a lesson
IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG REPOST THIS

ĎIn case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods: On a Myer hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping".
(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap".
(And that would be how?)
On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost".
(But, it's just a suggestion).
On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down".
(Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating".
(And you thought?...)
On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body".
(But wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication".
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness".
(And...I'm taking this because?)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only".
(As opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor:"Not to be used for the other use".
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Nobby's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts".
(Talk about a news flash!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts".
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly".
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals".
(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)í from the profile of Fizzgig and Ragamuffin

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If youíre one of the 2 percent who hasnít, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you love God with your whole heart and are 100 percent proud of it, copy & paste this in your profile.

Even when you cant see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you donít know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique,so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your head off.

If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile.

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who arenít, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, SamanthaFantasyFan, EdwardAddict, Supergirrl, Elemental-ANimal, Mother Natureís Daughter, Schmerg_The_Impaler, MissyQuill, Miss Sophie Potter

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy and paste this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

-If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

-If youíre one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

-If youíve been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

-If you donít watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

You know you live in 2008 when...

1. You go to a party, sit down and take MySpace pics.

2. You havenít played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they donít have AIM/LiveJournal/MySpace.

4. Youíd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.

6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.

7. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.

8. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.

9. You were too busy to notice number five.

10. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five.

11. And now youíre laughing at your stupidity.

12. Put this in your pro if you fell for it. You know you did.

It is a mistake to think that you can solve any major problems just with potatoes." -Douglas Adams

My name is Tiffany

I am three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I werenít ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I canít do a wrong

I canít speak at all

Or else im locked up

All day long.

When im awake im all alone

The house is dark

My folks arenít home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe ill just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlieís bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

Iím so afraid now

Iím starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

Heís already locked it

And i start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"Iím sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

Into a unimaginable shape

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While i lay there motionless

Brawled on the floor

My name is Tiffany

I am three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me

And you can help

Sickens me top the soul,

And if you read this

and donít pass it on

I pray for your forgiveness

Because you would have to be

One heartless person

To not be effected

By this Poem

And because you are effected,

Do something about it!

So all i ask you to do

Is pass this on!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE

Please pass it on.

Quotes:

"It's better to fail in originality, than to succed in imitation."- Herman Melville

"Just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon, doesn't mean we all do."- Hermione Granger

"I drank some magic potion, and now I'm sexy"- Donkey(Shrek2)Ain't got no grills

"When you're forced to stand alone, you realize what you have in you."- Uma Thurman

"Don't make me come down there!"- God(yeah, not a direct quote, but still really funny;)

"I smile because I have no idea what's going on."- a tee shirt my freind had on

"If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything"- Marlyn Monroe

"If you're a bird, I'm a bird."- Noah in 'The Notebook'

"I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not."-Kurt Coban

"Live.Laugh.Love."- A door hanger a Wal-Mart

"Ain't got no grills, but I still wear braces"-Weird Al in "White and Nerdy"

"Spiderpig, Spiderpig. Does whatever a spiderpig does. Can he swing from a web? No he can't, he's a pig.Look out he's a spiderpig!"- Homer Simpson

"Even the best fall down sometimes."- Howie Day" Collide"

"Go Wildcats!"- Mayor of my Town


'you- complete- arse- Ronald- Weasely!' - Hermione Granger


(Hi! my name is Sarah. B. I am Lauren's alternate personality. I do not live in Ohio anymore... go Hoosiers! :) I also have OHPD and LOVE to read- constantly-I also read this series called twilight- its good. but HP is better. I play soccer and am in show choir. I am the bookish but still one of very weird ones in our little circle. I am 15, going on 16 and I am about 5'7" My fave author on fanfiction is Vindictus Viridian. I am now a sophomore! yeah!!
OMG- Sarah's so weird, but i love her anywayz!!! The weirdest would have to be Sarah T., she's short, blonde haired and blue eyed. We call her the nazi because she's in
German Club. : ).Not that we have anything against German club people... just to tease her. :)
[Report This]
Reviews by lmcayton
 

Prefect Not Perfect by TaraAnnFelton
Rated: Professors [Reviews - 244]

Summary: Hermione Granger normally cannot stand perfection, having been mocked for being perfect her whole life. Matters become worse when a simple plan to prove her "wild side" turns into the romance of a life time. The problem: He is absolutely perfect. According to her, at least.


Things get out of control, and after one thing leads to another, Hermione is forced to choose between losing what she has and losing what she wants.





Ignores books 6 and 7, but takes place in year 7


Categories: Hermione/Draco Genre: Warnings: Abuse, Book 7 Disregarded, Character Death, Non-Consensual Sex, Sexual Situations, Violence

Word count: 12268 Chapters: 10 Completed: No
Published:
11/09/04 Updated: 11/12/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 12/20/07 Title: Chapter 10: Hermione's Solution

hurry up &finish!

 

Summary: What will happen when Harry has to face his fear of a certain muggle snack at school? Who will find out? Who will tell the whole school?

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 2374 Chapters: 3 Completed: Yes
Published:
12/12/04 Updated: 12/21/04


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 08/13/07 Title: Chapter 3: Learning to Deal

wow that really was short- and probably the most interesting fanfic to date

 

April Rain by Kimberley
Rated: Professors [Reviews - 455]

Summary: ***COMPLETED!***Five years ago, half way through her third year at Hogwarts, Regan Jayden was expelled for reasons only she and a very select few know. But now that she's been allowed to return-- under certain terms-- in what would have been her graduating year, will she be able to regain the trust of her fellow Hogwarts students, and of herself?

Excerpt from story: Merlin, he was going soft, Draco thought as he tried not to grimace. He'd start spouting off poetry in a minute if he wasn't careful. This whole love thing was sending him round the twist.



Categories: Draco/Other Character Genre: Warnings: Violence, Sexual Situations

Word count: 84064 Chapters: 20 Completed: Yes
Published:
01/10/05 Updated: 07/09/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 02/19/08 Title: Chapter 15: The Last Rose

great story!!!

 
Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 02/19/08 Title: Chapter 16: Ball Handling

4? and WHERES MY COOKIE?!?!!?

 
Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 02/20/08 Title: Chapter 18: Birthday Letters

*sniff sniff* there had better be a happy ending.... or else!!!

 
Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 02/20/08 Title: Chapter 19: Strictly Below The Belt

SPLAT! teehee no, but seriously... pretty awesome so far! ;-)

 
Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 02/20/08 Title: Chapter 20: Legalities and Lemon Drops

YAY!!! happy ending..... now, WHERE'S THAT SEQUEL???
:D

 
Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 02/20/08 Title: Chapter 1: The Homecoming

Is there something wrong with my computer? b/c none of my reviews showed up. :( write back please!!

 

The Sweetest Sin by annie
Rated: Professors [Reviews - 1849]

Summary: In the years following Voldemort's victory in the second war, Muggle-borns must become slaves and servants to pure-bloods in order to survive. Over time, Hermione Granger has learned to suppress her pride and independence in households where she is considered lower than dirt. She thought she would be prepared for this new family, just like she was for all the previous ones. What she didn't know was that this new family was none other than Draco Malfoy's. Will she manage hold up when she finds herself struggling to withhold her sharp tongue, returning hatred, and...something else?

The last chapter of this story has been posted! Thanks for reading :)

Thank you to everyone who voted "The Sweetest Sin" as the Best Tearjerker in round 4 of the Dramione Awards!

Thanks to some of my amazing readers, The Sweetest Sin has been/is being translated into seven languages: French, Italian, Russian, Portuguese, Czech, Latvian, and Chinese. If you would like the links to any of the translations, please e-mail me or leave a review :)

Categories: Hermione/Draco Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Non-Consensual Sex, Violence

Word count: 59909 Chapters: 26 Completed: Yes
Published:
02/02/05 Updated: 12/20/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 03/04/09 Title: Chapter 26: Epilogue

Wow. That was a great ending.... you are a superb author. I love how you portrayed the world had Voldemort succeeded, and how you made this Dramione so believable.
Also, I think the metaphor would be Draco letting go of Hermione from wherever he is.
Again, wonderful story. keep it up!

 

Summary: Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny invent a new name for Lord Voldemort. He doesn't care for it, though, so he comes up with a new identity of his own. (One-shot)

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 4597 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
03/08/05 Updated: 03/08/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 02/26/09 Title: Chapter 1: What's In A Name?

Mmmmm, I would kill for a Dove Dark Chocolate Bar right about now...

 

The Power Of Suggestion by FriendsOfSnape
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 650]

Summary: "Be careful what you wish for," the old adage goes. So what happens when Hogwarts is under a spell where what you say is what you get?


Chappie 14 is UP! And while it is the end, let us not be sad, but instead read the insanity that has driven so many to review and nearly wet themsleves with delight.

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 27684 Chapters: 14 Completed: Yes
Published:
03/10/05 Updated: 07/21/06


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 06/15/08 Title: Chapter 3: Repetitive noise is a form of torture

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!
*choke...* *gasp* smiles

Author's Response: I sure hope I didn\'t just kill someone....

 

Soap Pie by Lirael Astarael
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 112]

Summary: *ONE-SHOT* After carefully observing (ahem) a row between Ron and Hermione, Fred and George concoct an evil plan...and a pie. A sniff of Harry/Ginny and, of course, the odor of pie.

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 2075 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
04/11/05 Updated: 04/11/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 11/11/07 Title: Chapter 1: Soap Pie

Ha Ha That banana thing was hilarious

Author's Response: Yeah, apparently. Still confused about that. Thanks for reviewing.

 

Wasted Years by MoonyPadfootProngs
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 8]

Summary: Sirius reflects on his life as he lives out his lonely twelve years in Azkaban. One-shot Songfic based on Cold's "Wasted Years". (All recognizable characters are owned by JK Rowling)

Categories: Dark/Angsty Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1290 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
04/29/05 Updated: 04/29/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 11/20/07 Title: Chapter 1: Wasted Years

That was awsome!!!!! Although I will admit a little creepy.

 

Summary: A look into the life of Voldy's pet snake, Nagini.

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: Alternate Universe

Word count: 7566 Chapters: 7 Completed: Yes
Published:
05/01/05 Updated: 11/05/06


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 03/13/08 Title: Chapter 1: Memiors of a snake...

SWEET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Author's Response: Thanks!!

 
Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 03/14/08 Title: Chapter 7: The Final Thoughts of Nagini

THE BEST STORY EVER!!!!!!!!!

Author's Response: Thanks so much!! :-D

 

A DESTINY FULFILLED by Wiccan
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 169]

Summary: Harry, Ron and Hermione survived the Final Battle with Voldemort and now work for the Ministry of Magic. Emotionally scarred, they are living their lives to the best of their abilities. Now, a new threat rears its ugly head. Lord Malfoy. This time they have a new friend to help in the battle between good and evil. Just like JKR, I start light and end up dark... lots of humor, intrigue and romance in between. This is a delightful romp through the Potterverse. Enjoy the ride! (Written Pre HBP)

Categories: Post-Hogwarts Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 41157 Chapters: 24 Completed: Yes
Published:
05/08/05 Updated: 09/07/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 12/11/08 Title: Chapter 9: Ch 9 CRAM SESSIONS

This story is very good. :)

 
Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 12/11/08 Title: Chapter 24: Ch 24: EPILOGUE

Wow.... you are an exceptionally talented author. I loved how you worked your own take on how Dumbledore had survived, and you also created a very lovable OC. You tied up the loose ends, and added your own touches, like the Faerie. Splendid job.... perhaps you should be an author.

 

Barbie Girl by CraftySlytherin
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 244]

Summary: It's just your average, boring Summer day on Privet Drive. Or is it? Harry is stuck doing another one of his many thankless chores, when he hears something VERY interesting coming from Dudley's room and goes to investigate.

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1780 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
05/31/05 Updated: 05/31/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 05/22/08 Title: Chapter 1: One-Shot

Well..*giggles madly* these cells are quite nice- no homework, good food, bouncy floor, and internet access!! I can read mugglenet fanfiction all day!
The story was funny, and I think you should continue to write such amusing stuff! *teehee...*

 

Summary: She could walk through the graveyard without blinking, bypassing the graves of fallen childhood friends. She could walk through the halls of Hogwarts without missing a step, tracing back a path to her first day as she rushed through the school. She could even make her way to the Forbidden Forest and trample through it, ignoring the splashes and stains that still marred the aged trees and wasted ground. But Hermione cannot make herself face the Great Lake, calm on this balmy summer day, where she had watched three people she had slowly grown to love fade from existence. Character Death within. Post-Hogwarts.

Categories: Post-Hogwarts Genre: Warnings: Sexual Situations

Word count: 1967 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/16/05 Updated: 08/16/05


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 09/17/08 Title: Chapter 1: Through Fields of Gold [one-shot]

*goosebumps*
That was chilling.....sorrowful....... and yet.... I find that it is worthy of publishing....
good job.

 

Summary: James is going to be stuck with Lily for the entire summer...wait...isn't that supposed to be a good thing? In between all the angst and indecision, will these two EVER get together? Hmmm...maybe with a little help with a birdie named Sirius...

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 16324 Chapters: 7 Completed: No
Published:
09/05/05 Updated: 07/04/07


Reviewer: lmcayton Signed
Date: 06/12/07 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6

i really liked this one- it was my favorite!!!!

 
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