Well, I'm not among those types who'll write a lazy 'i-can't-write-about-me's-and-it's-for-you-guyz-and-gals-to-describe-me' sorta thing because the only two people who know you perfectly are God and yourself..and no one else.
As you might have guessed, I am not one of your everyday types, as stepping into this link you might have realised you are tresspassing the portents of a classified upper mortal..so what are still looking at your screen for? BOW LOW! (lol!)
I'm your unusual kind of guy with your average kind of faults. I'm an introvert, lazy, marginally creative and someone who thinks a lot before jumping to conclusions...in fact too much for his own good.
I worship J K Rowling, revere Severus Snape and enjoy the antics of Squidward Tentacles. I have little patience with smokers, criminals and people with no respect for women or animals. Many of my friends (or maybe none of them) will tell you that I'm a weird piece of work because nothing interests me more than doing something alone or just sitting doing nothing. But I also have a genial nature and the aura of making people around me feel comfortable. Also I'm an IITian, an avid TV watcher and a staunch believer of God.
be sorted @ nimbo.net
Summary: It is argued that the most minuscule of occurrences can shape the course of history irrevocably. Butterflies flapping their wings overzealously, missing a train/forcing open the sliding doors of a train and catching it/getting your finger stuck in the sliding doors of a train as you attempt to force them open and having to run alongside it for the duration of the journey as an alternative to having it ripped off…and other such minutiae. Thus it was that, on a cold, wet night seventeen years ago, in a room above the bar at the Hog’s Head Inn, that Severus Snape made his (skid)mark. The History of the Potterverse is now at stake, and it remains for Lily Potter (with a little help from Lupin) to sort it all out. BE YE WARNED - this story contains pants. Underpants. (This story is intended as a bit of light-hearted fun and should be read as such, even if it is rather OOC!) Final chapter is up! Gather round, my children, and witness the astonishing finale!
Er...after the first two chapters, I preferred the story to proceed and end the same manner. I really like your wit and wordy style of writing (I HOOUR verbosity, considering I'm verbose too!) but I was disappointed when you so rushed up the story. I think you should have thrown in a couple of chapters more and made the thing wordier, I would have loved to read that. You sound like a very witty person so I daresay, you would have found many more witticisms and humour to be included in the extra chapters. Nevertheless, I have favourited the fic, simply because it far outstrips the average humour standard at MNFF. People treat humour writing as blogging and look down upon it, including ridiculous OC's, painful cliches, plots borrowed from funny films...I'm glad to see you haven't done the same! I'll be waiting desperately for your next humour fic....and I want it to be written the way you wrote chapters 1 and 2...good luck...and really sorry for the negative review!
Impeccable ridiculous humour and pompous literary language! How - in the name of Tobias - did you mix them together so well? I used to believe that using such language and making the reader go 'Ha ha ha' was an impossible task, but you've proved me wrong!
“But what have you got there, Professor Dumbledore?” inquired Trelawney after having finished her slumping and reawakening routine.
“It would appear,” said Dumbledore slowly, “that there is some kind of...”
"A mark!" breathed Trelawney, her eyes widening as she leaned forward to gaze into the folds of the soiled material.
“Yes indeed,” said Dumbledore gravely. “A dark mark.”
The best passage of the chapter!
Author's Response: Ooh thanks for reading! And I\'m glad you enjoyed the combination of the slapstick and the wordy - it\'s not always to everybody\'s taste! Good luck with the rest of your fic. I\'ll be reading...
Summary: The Harry Potter Literary Storm has caused quite the sensation around the world, JK Rowling’s magnificent series of books touching the hearts of people of all ages. But what if Harry Potter was never written by JK Rowling in the first place? What if another genius was behind it?
Many thanks to the fantastic people who nominated this story for the Quicksilver Quills: Best Humour Fiction award. I'm truly flattered.
Chapter Seven, Part Five is now up - yes, that is the final chapter!
Sorry but this chapter compared to the rest was DISSATISFACTORY
it was too over the top and the humor was lame...
Author's Response: *Blink* Seriously? Because I liked it.
oh my! how brilliant r u??
i was the one who had given u a negative review for chap 6; but NOW u've outdone everything! I'm rally pleased with chap 7, which has caused my sides hurting!
U SINCERELY deserve to win the Quill Award!
Aww - thank you!
I guess I can hope for the award next time... although I\'m pretty sure people will be thinking more of new stories, of course ;)
I hope you enjoy what\'s left of Happy\'s story.
Summary: What does Lord Voldemort do in his spare time? Well, that's an excellent question. Who would have known that the Dark Lord has a blog? (He also has a loyal following of readers, most of whom are Death Eaters and who post their comments.) Voldemort dispenses advice on everything from murder methods to germ protection to Power Rangers to shoes, and gives an account of the life of an evil overlord. But is he posting too much personal information online? And will Harry read it and find out more about the Dark Lord than Voldemort ever intended? Read and see.
WARNING: Extremely OOC behaviour from almost all.
RUNNER-UP in the 2007 Quicksilver Quills Awards for Best Humour fic! Also nominated like 21 times, because apparently my readers are as insane as I am!
YOU ARE BRILLIANT! WHY DDNT UR STORY WIN THE BEST HUMORFIC QUILL THING?
Author's Response: Aw, thank you so much! But nominations for the \"Best Humourfic Quill Thing\" had already closed before I\'d even written the first chapter of this story... You can always nominate me next year.... ;-)
A fitting ending to such a humourous journey..and to think you r only 14!!!
You RULE!!! NO ONE could do this better than YOU!
650 or so reviews and u answer all of them so patiently and beautifully!!!!
And oh yes, thanks for reviewing my fic, it made my NEW YEAR!!!!
*Exclamation mark button wheezes and quails*
Author's Response: Thank you ever so much! I feel really honoured to get a review from you, seeing as your fic was sheer and utter genius! Yeah, I love Voldemort... to me, he\'s the funniest character in the HP series because he\'s so overdramatic!
Your fic was brilliant from start till end; i could see that the references and stuff were meticulous and well-planned (i must reread; im sure i missed most references) and of course insanely funny. you are in the truest sense a "Humour Author" and not just a "Fanfic Writer"
I think in this site you must be one of the most literary talented geniuses.
Keep writing, its a god gift, not just in harry potter and humor but other genres too and one day we are sure to find your psuedonym "Schmergo" on a bestselling book cover!
Author's Response: Aww, thank you! That really cheered me up, especially since I\'m a big fan of your humour story.Yeah, if I ever write a book, I will write on the flap inside, \"You may know this author as Schmergo.\"
I just reread this fic and found it as hilarious as last time!
Please write some more; it's just too much fun to imagine Voldy blogging and saying what he said!
Author's Response: Yay, thanks! I\'ll try... I\'ve been ridiculously busy as of late...
Summary: A poem about Voldemort.
Old Voldie I say,
His brain is mouldy...
But hey princess, if u really want Mouldy dead, won't u need to extricate something YOU allegedly have????
Anyways, keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Hmph. I have no idea what you are talking about. Anyway thanks for the review. :)
Summary: The Death Eaters have to decide what to get Lord Voldemort for Christmas. Fun ensues.
***WINNER in the 2007 Phoenix Rising 'Mistletoe & Mayhem' Competition***
Ha ha! Excellent!
I loved your characterization, the Snape -Bella chemistry, Wormtail being pushed around and * smirk * "Scrabble Champion!" THAT Really killed me! DO write more!
Summary: Post-HBP, a lot of developments have begun to take place. While Harry is preparing himself for the big battle, You-Know-Who and his two-minded servant are too....So you have him bursting in the scene everywhere - in the wedding, in Mundungus' den, in Godric's and even in JKR's mansion...
For is a crazy universe where the real and literary worlds coexist - and the only person who hasn't read book 6 is none other than - Lord Voldemort!
Warning: severe OOCness
And what do readers say about it?
"HAHAHAHAHAHA! This is amazing! I love stories about Voldemort, and this one definitely does him justice. You have a wonderful sense of humour..."
Schmerg_the_Impaler, reknowned author of "The Dark Lord's Blog"
Chapter 3: Marital Mayhem…Part 4...The Last Leg…(the second last chapter) is waiting in line!
Oh my...all you beautiful readers!!!
Daddy's back! Finally! After his painful four-month long writer's block! Back to square one, after thinking his life could also be COOL like all non-fanfickers, but was so wrong because his love really was in making you wonderful people laugh!!
I'm back friends, HUG ME!! *opens arms*
Summary: The Order of the Phoenix and the Death Eaters are locked in battle over a highly important magical artifact known to most as Voldy's Deathpants, in bold letters like that. However, they go about battle in a, er, highly unusual way-- a Quidditch match!
Probably the silliest thing that's ever appeared on this site, featuring highly OOC behaviour.
Deathpants is a team of writers consisting of Mind_Over_Matter, cmwinters, wendelin the wierd, and Schmerg_The_Impaler. Our story was written in Round Robin format. This (and our deranged minds) explains its randomness. Enjoy!
The insanity of the Deathpants has gotten to the mods! This ridiculous story WON the 2008 Quicksilver Quill Award for Best Humour Story!
Brilliant! Exceedingly funny!
I love the General Uproar thing, Voldemort's commentary, the slow motions and Nagini on the broom. My sided still hurt especially the werewolf transformation parts.
The story changed style in places that's completely understandable as its a round robin
Gr8 work! Please do a round robin again!
And if im not wrong the red and yellow trousers as a horcrux have already become a part of humour fannon!
Author's Response: Wow, thank you! I hope your sides are okay! I just love the image of Nagini trying to fly... Ooh, great, when I read Deathly Hallows, you know I\'m going to be looking for the Deathpants when Harry\'s on the Hunt for the Horcruxes.
Author's Response: Eek! I forgot to sign that response. That last one was by me, Schmerg_The_Impaler (and this one, too).
Summary: Its a quiet sort of day in the Gryffindor common room. The Marauders decide to lighten things up with a little Truth or Dare. But, they think that's boring. They have their own version......
Nice, funny fic..slightly abrupt in the starting. It would be great if you could add a bit more description - i know you'd say "description, what description!" but my humour fic had the same problem too and now after description it seems funnier than before.
The characterization was good, the story didn't seem OOC in any sense. Keep going on, I'm waiting for an update!
Author's Response: Thanks! I\'m trying to stay true to the original characters, but I had to inflate their personality just a tad.
Better than last time, loved it! Funny for a non-funny chapter. Can't wait for their next day at school!
Author's Response: Thanks! Lots of people have said that this chapter was better.
Summary: When Sirius and James hex Remus with a mustache, much fun ensues, and there's revenge to be had... of course. Therapy for those who just HATE the look of MovieRemus!
While reading, it travels like knife through butter and makes one wanna read more. It was extremely funny and I wish you'd write more!
Author's Response: Thanks! This review just makes me warm and tingly. *laughs* I\'m very glad you liked it, and there\'ll be more to come, I promise. :)
Rated: [Reviews - ]
Nice work...but I suggest you shorten the descriptions a bit. It seems slightly tiring to hear and rehear the descriptions of characters, traits etc.
Seems like a lot of fun is going to begin from chapter 2!
Author's Response: yeah well it\'s just a one-time thing... never again in the story lol
Summary: For it was a jolly little Winter's night when Luna first spoke of her crazy plan to save the Ministry from dark magic and gum disease - and thus she pledged to wage a war again the Rotfang Conspiracy.
Of course, a slightly hung over Trelawney didn't anticipate being made Luna's right hand woman, but as she clutches her toothpaste tube, she hopes to what ever gods there are that she wore clean underwear that day...
Written for VV for the Turnip Story swap and full of crack!y goodness.
Excellent work...a humour fic of good quality! Neither over-the-top nor lame...outstanding
What's "pwn" by the way?
Author's Response: Wow, thank you SO much! Really, it means a great deal to me!
Ah, bless typos. \'pwn\' means to \'own\' as in, \'I\'m so muhc better than you. I totally pwn\' so... it\'s like a verb, a pronoun, a noun and an adjective all at the same tme :D
Summary: Lucius Malfoy is most infamous for being excessively proud of his ancestry and for his disdain for Muggle-borns. But what if he received a letter that changed everything? Takes place during OotP, and it's AU.
Contains snippets of humour.
For the "Dreams" challenge in the fanfiction beta boards... I am Schmerg_The_Impaler of Hufflepuff House.
Impeccable, Schmergo, as usual...I liked the names you selected for the newer charaters, the bits of humour in between (May the Dark Lord rest in pieces...ingenious) and Lucy (ius!)'s expression when he finished the letter. I found the titlle rather silly, considering the fact that that owl thing happened only for a flit of a moment. I think this story is completle, with the ending hanging so and may not need a new chapter (unless you are planning something completely fantabuloustic). Yet I'm WAITING for an update!!!
Author's Response: Thanks, SevenAndMoreToGo! But actually, the story is not complete. There will indeed be a bit more... I think the ending will really surprise you! Yeah, the title\'s a little silly... I couldn\'t help it. I guess I always do silly chapter titles.
Summary: Gilderoy Lockhart is safely locked up in St. Mungo’s until he recovers from his lost memory…right? A one-shot detailing Lockhart’s one day of freedom.
Cute, fresh, complete, funny...It is, among the one-shot humour fics I've read, one of the best. Good Work! Continue making us laugh!
Author's Response: Wow! Thank you! I was so sure no one would like it.
Summary: Written Pre-DH
In Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix, Moody tells Harry never to put his wand in his back pocket. Now we get to find out why he told Harry this bit of valuable info, and just what better wizard than him has lost a buttock.
Rated 3rd to 5th years just in case.
I've sent you a review on your email address.... the "Submit a Review" feature wasn't working earlier on my computer