Please do not delete Thanks
Hello, hello! I am Sasha, Sash, Seddy, Seddy-kinz, Seddy-la, Sed, or anything you wish to call me, s'long it's not obscene. :3
So I own SilverQuill Forums, a forum designed specifically to help teens who write. 'Tis a great site, you should look at it. 'Cause I'm not biased or anything, right? ^^
I'm working an an alternate universe fic currently....I'll get it up ASAP!
Word choice, vivid descriptions, dramatic scenes, plot and imagination
Dialogue and character development....rrgh....
AH! Finally! *huggles*
Lindi's reason for swerving around the treetops is quite touching, I like it.
“I’m still not allowed to do magic in the hallways; I can’t Apparate until I pass the test, and somehow, I doubt Firewhiskey will be quite as appealing when it isn’t forbidden.”
ROFLMAO!!!! Remus is quite the fun-killer.
I LOVE the cups. Brilliant! I want glasses like that...*tinkers with wineglass*
And as for Lindi as the French maid....
I think we saw an appearance of Mr. Horny Remus there. XD *shoos off Prefect Remus*
All I can say is that I'm relieved for Remus. I was so so so so so so so (is that enough? XD) sure that they would spill, thinking that it was for Remus's own good.
Great chapter, and I hope the downtime gave you a chance to get ahead!
Author's Response: Thank you, Seddy! I\'m so glad you enjoyed it. LOLOL I don\'t think you should shoo away Prefect Remus. I think Remus might need him. *giggles* Thank you for the wonderful review. I sure wish I could tell you your hope had been fulfilled, but I didn\'t really get any downtime for writing during the downtime. :( I\'m afraid it is going to be a little while. I promise to do my best, though, and ncouraging reviews like this help motivate me. :)
I just wanted to let you know that I've kept up with this fic for over four years now, and it's still as excellent as ever. it's seen me through high school and into college! I think it's great that you've kept up with this fic for so long. thanks so much for the years of enjoyment ! hope you're doing well :)
Author's Response: Seddy!!!! I'm so glad to *see* you! Has it really been that long? College.... Arghh...I feel so old! I'm so glad it has given you enjoyment for so long and that you are still with me. Thank you for letting me know. And I'm pretty well, thank you. I had a death in the family, which has kept me away recently. An older family member, so nothing 'tragic', but sad and difficult, nonetheless. Anyway, getting this and the other wonderful reviews has been a source of cheering, so thank you again.
Hehe, I love Will. :3
Hmmm.... are you suggesting, with Peter's attitude, that he's already joined the Dark Lord? Or considering joining him? Given how you've made him out as very attached to the Marauders, I find it a bit sudden... but it's a very good idea to involve that into the plot, if you did do it on purpose. I just imagined Peter's separation being connected to some big fight or something. I hope I'm not being too critical! I have a habit of critiquing things very, very harshly. I'm so sorry!
Author's Response: Oh, goodness, no, Sedragore. Peter is not even close to that yet. I certainly didn\'t mean to even hint at that. I think this is part of that problem I\'ve been having with Peter. >.< This was merely meant to hint at the idea that Peter is weaker/more fearful of Voldemort than the others were. He was just genuinely growing frightened of the name. *really must work on the Peter factor* >.< Please don\'t be sorry for any genuine criticism. If I have made an error or am not being clear, I surely want to know. Thank you for bringing that possible misinterpretation to my attention. Oh, and I am quite fond of Will, too. So glad you like him. Thank you, Sedragore.
You missed a typo!
ďLindi! Over hear,Ē she called."
You mean "over here". :3
The time-line details aren't very important, frankly. It works extremely well without getting into the specific dates. Jo also says that stamping a timeline on the series ruins it. There isn't much of a point going into that kind of detail.
Author's Response: Ack!!!! Homophone error! LOL Now, you realize this will bug me and I can\'t correct it for fear of crashing the entire site due to the hacker problems, right? *slight exaggeration but I am not messing with the story for fear of causing it to be deleted or something* After the problems I had with posting the last chapter, Iím taking no chances. I am so hopeful that when they upgrade the site, it will be possible to easily edit things like this without messing up the spacing of the chapter or anything. *sigh* I will correct this when I can. Thanks for pointing that out. :)
You know, I am such a dingbat! I could not figure out what you were talking about re: the time-line details. I went and read chapter six...twice...and couldn\'t figure it out. *headdesk* It was the chapter TITLE, not chapter number...SIXTH Year Begins and I kept going back to chapter SIX...*silly ditz* I\'m tired. I haven\'t had a moment to myself for 9 days, so overlook my insanity. So anyway, I finally figured it out...I\'m glad the time-line discrepancies aren\'t too annoying. Not a lot I can do at this point, but it did throw me when the last two books came out and showed I was off. So thanks, Sedragore. I appreciate that! :)
RRGH! *tears out hair* A cliffhanger, a cliffhanger! *runs away bawling*
Can't wait *(literally....meh) to see what happens! ^^
Author's Response: :*) I\'m so sorry. I really did mean to have the two parts posted closer together. *is awful updater* I have the chapter finished and am a little embarrassed at the length. I had divided the chapter up because it was going to exceed the 10,000 word chapter limit on MNFF. Well, as is like me, this second half of the chapter is now over 9,000 words. >.< The first half was what, over 6,000? *dies* *really needs to be less verbose* Anyway, with the site problems from the hacker, stories aren\'t being updated, so I\'m just sort of sitting on it, waiting for the upgrade. *hides from anxious readers* I promise to post the update as soon as the queue is back up and running. I hope you enjoy it when I do. :) Thank you, Sedragore.
Meh? I just looked back and saw that half of my reviews have been cut off....>.< And I posted a nice critique, too... oh wellz. The gist of it is that your talent as a write seems to be dialogue, and I respect you greatly for that. Since I SUCK at dialogue. >.< Also, the truly miraculous thing about MOMENTS OF BLISS is that it fits smoothly and seamlessly into the original canon. I've thoroughly blurred the line between canon and your fic... I think I even once mentioned one of your scenes as canon in a HP discussion. >.< The characters are the most realistic thing I've seen by an internet fic in a LONG time, not to mention the well developed plot. If fanfics could be published, you could easily, easily publish this. And have like a bajillion fans. :3
Author's Response: *beaming* Well, apparently the site glitches are affecting reviews also. *makes note to copy reviews for safe keeping* Iím so glad you didnít give up after having them cut. Thank you, thank you for this amazing review. I do adore writing dialogue; it\'s my favorite part to do, so I\'m glad you enjoy it. >.> You have confused one of my scenes with canon in a discussion? LOL Oh, I\'d love to hear about that. Which scene? *hehehe* The others must have looked at you like you were crazy! A bajillion fans...*dreams* *freaks out over the pressure* :*) Of course, it would be nice to be paid...LOL Still, with reviews like this, I\'m quite content as is. Thank you, Sedragore. :D
Okay, even though I've been with this story since around chap 8, I've never posted a review. >.< Stupid Sasha. Anywho, I'd like you to know that I've fallen in love with Remus, completely and utterly.
Author's Response: Oh, wow, Sedragore, you\'ve been here a LONG time. I can\'t even remember chapter 8. >.< lol I appreciate reviews regardless of if they come sooner or later, so no worries. If you are in love with Remus, you are NOT stupid! :-D If my story has helped you fall for him, I am absolutely thrilled. It is my mission after all. ;) Thank you, Sasha.
Neeeeeeh. *grumblrgrumble* I wanted to be the first one to review, but I couldn't log on.Congrats on finally finishing the chapter! I know that these past few months must have been busy for you. ^^ It was a light, carefree chapter. I loved reading it! You just let the suspense build and build, don't you? Grrr. *stomps foot in impatience* That's what makes MoB awesome!
Author's Response: Aww...*pets Seddy* Why wouldn't the site let you on? Too busy? I know it has made it a little frustrating for me to answer reviews...loading very sloooowwly. Then logging me out...>.< *sigh* Oh well, you made it in and I'm so happy you did. Yes things have been extremely busy, but I've enjoyed getting back into the story here lately. So hopefully, you won't have to be as patient as before. :*) I like suspense, <.< can you tell? But hopefully, I won't build it so much that it is all terribly anti-climactic. I'll try to keep that in order. ;) Thanks for all your encouragement.
EXCELLENT plot device!!!!!!! *glomps*
Wow. I'm quite amazed. You came up with a plausible "problem" in the plot, and you did it smoothly. Not to mention, the timing was PERFECTLY right. :3
Author's Response: Thank you so much, Sedragore. I\'m thrilled that this worked. :D
Aww, so cute! And it's just like Lindi to ask even though it's so, so obvious. :P
I like the closing sentence, too. Snips it off much more satisfactorily than most of your other chapters. Even though the reason you don't do that with others is because they're cliffhangers, but...
Lol, it's a Lindi-glomp! :P
Actually, I think Sirius's thing in this chapter is completely in character, at least the way you've built him up.
Good job! :3
Author's Response: <.< You don\'t like my cliffhangers? >.> But they were so much fun when I was first posting them and readers had to wait to move to the next chapter. <.< *Muwahahahah* ;) I\'m glad the Sirius thing isn\'t a problem. I know people will probably still be arguing about Sirius and girls in a hundred years, but everything about him screams that he would be a bit that way, at least. I\'m relatively old, and I\'ve known a LOT of guys in my day, and with his circumstances, he just would, so...that\'s my opinion and it outa be yers! LOL
Please note that that opinion thing is a line from a radio personality and it cracks me up. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I respect that. <.< but mine is the right one. :P *heheheh* Thank you so much for reviewing, Seddy! :D
LOL, Sirius sleeping....that's so like him! :p
"I don't want to hit ANYONE..." Classic Lindi.
And Sirius threatening and tricking Lindi that way. So in character! I loved it! ^^
And another "LOL" is due to Peter pondering Lindi's underwear.
Yet another goes to the "post-nasal drainage".
XD This is by far one of your funniest chapters!
Hmm.... it occurs to me that the only character in the whole of MOB that needs working on is Peter. I feel his character hasn't been quite defined as well as Sirius's.
Author's Response: I am always so happy when someone says they found something funny (that I meant to be funny). I guess it is because I\'m never quite sure about my humor. Anyway, I\'m really glad you enjoyed it. Peter...Peter, Peter, Peter...He is such a headache in so many ways. lol I do not have a good grasp of him, no. I have tried to include him but I have to force myself to be nice to him; <.< I have to temper the urge to show him as a creepy little rat. *sigh* So I do rather neglect him. I just find him so hard to understand. I have been forcing myself to give him more thought lately, as I have been told this before. It isn\'t easy, I\'ll tell you. :P Nasty little rat! It is so much more pleasant to contemplate Remus and Sirius and pretty much anybody else. *heheh* Anyway, I will try to get a better handle on ole Wormtail. Thank you for keeping me on my toes! :)
*sings praises with origami birds flitting around*
I think this was my favorite chapter! :3 Genius, dear, genius! The song is adorable, and once again, completely in character. It all works, it just all works!
Author's Response: *happy dance* Thank you so much for letting me know that, :)
It's occurred to me just how well you've developed Remus. I've got this image in my head: Remus with two little figures sitting on either shoulder. But they aren't a devil and angel, oh no.
One is the Prefect/Werewolf Remus, the one that is forever self-conscious of his lycanthropy and doing what he knows is right. (I have GOT to stop calling it werewolfness....:P)
The other is what shall henceforth be referred to as the Horny Remus, who just wants to be a regular teen. This is the Remus that runs around with the Marauders, and is the one imagining Lindi in the shmexy black maid outfit. ^^
Author's Response: *LMAO* I LOVE it! Just as I have a strong opinion of Sirius, I have an even stronger one of Remus. Mainly that he was human, complete with hormones. ;) You do realize that now, I will be trying to write and that image will pop into my head...I won\'t be able to write! Thanks a lot, Sedragore! :P *dies laughing*
Wow, I just read through this whole thing. I have to admit, I was very, very turned off by the story the first three or four chapters. The only thing that made me keep reading was your review count! Gradually, though, I got hooked. I love your way of starting out chapters with obscure dialogue, which takes you by the hand and yanks you forcibly into the setting. I LOVE your humor, it works so, so, ever so well with the characters. The pranks, the dialogue, the jokes, the bang-bang-bang quick retorts. You've improved so much since those first few chapters, I can't even put it in words. Keep improving like you have and you'll zing up the ranks!
Your one weakness is plot. After they find out about Remus's lycanthropy, there doesn't seem to be much of a plot. I would work that out if I were you. There are plenty of good resources online that can help you format a good plot. Plan out your climax, your plot twists, everything. I'm looking forward to see what you come up to!
Author's Response: Yeah, the first few chapters aren\'t nearly as good as the others. The review count is insane, no one has ever reviewed my stories so much (and I thank everyone for that). The obscure dialogue is fun to write, not knowing who is saying what until a name finally shows up. I was having a hard coming up with plot points after Remus\'s lyncathropy revelation. Fourth year has a plot based around Remus\'s lycanthropy (unfortunately I\'m suffering serious writer\'s block for it), but there are plot points for the later years that I hope everyone enjoys. Thanks for reading and reviewing! Appreciate it!
Awwwwwwwwwwww! (is that enough w's?) So cute! So very, very, sweet! :3 I love the idea of a drawing, I love Lily running up to meet him.
The only think I think you should work on in your writing in general is imagery. In something as poignant as this piece, a little bittersweet imagery will do you wonders.
I.... I can't say anything but AWWWWWWW!!!!!!!! >.
Author's Response: :D Thank you, Seddy!