I promised a friend I would post this in my bio because she felt it was the most telling and honest thing I had ever written about myself.
“Hello, my name is Rachel and I am a functioning addict.”
In my head a chorus rings out in unison, “Hello Rachel”. If memory serves me right, next you are asked to display your shortcomings for all to see. I can only go from what I have seen on television, having never really been in a twelve step program. I start my story off by stating the facts. I have never used drugs. I only drink maybe twice a year. Although I have a healthy sex life I am far from a nymphomaniac. The extent of my gambling is a heavy loss of jellybeans to my daughter while teaching her poker. Having listed most of the common addictions, most would wonder what has such a strangle hold on my life. At the moment my brain is all consumed by “The Boy that lived”. Even though J.K. Rowling’s amazing series has inspired millions of our youths to turn off the TV and read, mine is a fanatical obsession. From daily hits on Mugglenet to becoming a devout mugglecast listener, I have let my newest obsession take over too many aspects of my life.
My life seems to be a succession of obsessions. I remember being as young as 5, obsessed with “Annie” the musical. So obsessed, I might add that I tried out for the part of an orphan. Thank god I can actually sing because that really could have been embarrassing. From Annie, it became Duran Duran and a line of others too long to list. What is it about me that I need to go from admirer of talent to superfan? Then one day it dawned on me. I have an obsessive personality. I am an addict, addicted to the high I get from these obsessions. Be it upbringing or “moral fiber” I never went down the windy road of the classic addictions. I had found a functional form of addiction. I could live my life day to day and function in normal society. Some of my close family and friends might have to deal with excessive rants about my chosen obsession but are tolerant out of love. In no other way does it outwardly appear that I am addicted. I care for my children well; I feed my husband a homemade meal every evening. I know it is cliché but I really am Suzy homemaker. I portray this façade to everyone, except those who are just like me.
Now it may be hard to believe but I get a physical high off of whatever passing fancy or celebrity I obsessing over. When I had the opportunity to get together with others who felt as I did, there was a heightened euphoria. One of my stronger obsessions was with the show Roswell. I traveled to Los Angeles by myself and met with friends I had connected with over the internet. Even though I had known these people for only a short amount of time the connection was instantaneous. We felt a sense of belonging with each other. One friend outside of my obsession referred to them as my drug buddies. These were people who my friend felt facilitated the high and even add to its intensity.
Having felt like a mental outsider, finding others who either share my interests or understand them is a rare find. This fan event it was like finding a Mecca to which my brain could travel to. As I write this I realize how odd that might sound to some. When your brain is in a constant state of multiple thoughts, you tend to need a vacation from yourself. Your life becomes a routine in which your body follows the actions it requires to live. Your mind however is entangled in so much that your frenzied synapses require a constant thought to focus all your mental energy. That generally becomes the obsession.
After much soul searching and deliberation, I have now decided that it is best to follow the obsession as long as it is not harmful to anyone else. As long as you have a firm grasp on reality and there have been no restraining orders issued, who are you harming? I have walked away from some of my forays into fandom with friends I would never trade for the world and who have become part of my life. At worst I lose the time and energy I devote to my obsession. At best this obsession provides me the mental escape I need to function through daily living.
I know in 12 step groups they end with the serenity prayer. It here seems appropriate too.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Which HP Kid Are You?
I am a sucker for weddings, can't wait.
Author's Response: *lol* So am I. Thank you!
I love the relationship you have created. The wedding was beautiful. I love Celtic traditions and folklore. I hope you update soon.
Author's Response: Thank you very much ;-)
Most people know where to butter their bread. I shall extoll the virtues of one of my favorite stories. I am enamored with this story and wait for its updates as patiently as possible. You shall get no stoning from me, just a wish to see more of those scenes. It was so well written and stirring. I can't wait untill the next update.
Not that I have tried it yet but I hear fight scenes are hard to write. You did an awesome job. It was easy to picture each action in succession. Very well staged.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the compliment...now be prepared for one of my own!
Everyone must read \"Torn and Tethered\" by Tagidi Riva it is AMAZING and it is exactly how Harry feels throughout this entire story!
Check it out for sure...you know I don\'t give endorsements lightly!!!
Nominated for a Quicksilver Quill for Best Romance-Non Canon 2007, 2008, and 2009. In 2010 mods changed the rules (they got tired of the same fics being nominated ^_~) so no more QQ hopes, but that's okay. No proof is needed that Draco/Ginny = love.
* Written before the HBP, this tale presents an alternate sixth year in which Dumbledore lives, Draco is more than a foil to Harry, and Blaise Zabini is a girl. I hope readers who ship Draco/Ginny will enjoy the story which includes dancing with faeries, Celtic and Norse mythology, school holidays in London and Spain, and loads of fantasy and romance. "Is this a kissing book?" (to quote the Princess Bride) Yes, it is. *
(Warnings were added for safety, due to brief allusions in later chapters, not graphic content.)
I throughly enjoy your eclectic taste in movies, music and literature. I actually got the Bugs Bunny reference, I love that cartoon. I am also so proud of Draco for going to Mr. Weasley. It is such a step in the right direction.
Author's Response: Yay for you having eclectic taste! Too many great things in the world to be insular, right?
Draco is making strides. He\'ll never be their choice for Ginny, but they will accept it, which is all he wants. :)
“Well, split my infinitives" I was actually holding my side I was laughing so hard.
As always, amazingly written. Your characterization of Draco is amazing. I actually feel for him. This is something I have never actually done before.
Author's Response: Huzzah for you liking Hook! Thank you for feeling for Draco, too. Have you ever heard The Smiths \'How Soon is Now\'? It\'s got lines that remind me of Draco.
I am the son and the heir of nothing in particular
You shut your mouth, how can you say
I go about things the wrong way
I am human, and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does.
The Hoggie part had me rolling yet again. It is honestly a joy to read your stories.
Author's Response: Thank you! Harry can be moody/broody but he\'s still a teenager who would get a double kick out of pulling on over on Malfoy. :D
Love is a rocky, rocky road. I honestly am worried for both of them. My hope springs eternal though when it comes to first love so I am comforted by the fact that there is no one that will ever mean more to each other. Kudos on another amazing chapter.
Author's Response: You\'re right about love being rocky. Ginny\'s family has found out, and they\'re not happy....but can you imagine how Lucius will react?
As always I truly enjoyed your story but the A/N had me rolling on the floor. You seem to find a plethora of movie referneces to draw from, it is quite impressive.
And as an added note you seem to also have a flair for fashion. Your detailed descriptions of what each character wears paints a beautiful picture in my head every time.
Author's Response: Books and films, I can remember the characters, plot, lines....major headline news? Forget about it, LOL. The fashion came from finding dresses I liked, then finding out details I could use to describe them so readers could have a mental image. Thank you so much for telling me you could \'see\' them! ^_^
Since I know you have lots of reviews, I hope you have bunches of banannas. This way you won't go hungry while writing your responses. Way to go Draco for insisting on standing by Ginny's side. Love the Tarzan reference. I used to watch those movies all the time. Luna as Daphne was spot on. Love the modern popular references, as well as the literary references you manage to seamlessly fit in. They are a joy.
Author's Response: I would gladly starve, if that\'s what it took to reply to reviews. They\'re better than banannas, better than chocolate, better than...no, not better than everything, LOL. I\'m so glad you like the references woven in. I really do think the magical world doesn\'t exist in a bubble, that most wizards and witches are aware of Muggle current events and culture, even if most Muggles are clueless about the existence of the Wizarding world. :)
Having had a male best friend, Draco and Blaise's friendship is so spot on. I also love the plotting that took place in this chapter. If you are going to attempt to fool anyone, planning is the key.
Author's Response: I\'ve had male friends, but never a male best friend, since the boy/girl thing seems to get in the way, and some things they just don\'t understand, lol. Thank you for that, and for appreciating the plotting!
Very glad would be my answer. I am still amazed at the dimensions you give Draco. It is phenomenal.
Author's Response: He\'s like a diamond that just needs the right cut and setting to sparkle. I want him to shine blindingly before the end of the story, hee.
This was a sweet chapter, I am amazed at Trelawney's expecting. I kind of see her handing her child a raincoat on a bright sunny day and saying "It is going to rain later, trust me I have seen it".
Author's Response: LOL at having a mother who can brush aside your \'but, mum!\' with Trust me. I have seen it.
Now that was an ending. Wow. You captured newlywed bliss very well.
I also like the addition of Romanian traditions, very informative.
Author's Response: I wanted you to \'see\' the centre and smell the flowers in the meadow and feel \'there\'. :D Thank you for saying I captured the bliss. I think all newlyweds should be that caught up in each other!
Bravo for an amazing story. I will sleep better knowing Ginny is safe and Draco is rid of that hideous woman. I agree with you stance on young marriage, leaving school and yeah the last thing too.
Author's Response: I\'ve had a couple readers who skip over the love and snogging parts, hard as it is to believe, lol, so thank you for endorsing it and encouraging so brilliantly! ♥
Ok I literally almost fell off the chair with the Mary Sue comment. As usual, just the right proportion of humor and fluff so that you remain amused and enthralled the whole time. I am happy the Weasley's are protrayed as kind and caring as I think they are. The minute I read Mushu, I had "Let's go kick some hunny buns" running through my head. Thanks for the mirth.
Author's Response: I think Draco has been paired with more Mary Sues than Ron has in fan fiction, heh, but the thought would give any canon character nightmares. :P Thank you for liking the mix of humor, fluff and drama...now you\'ve got me hearing Mushu! Thank you! :D
You are the first non H/G author that I have added to my favorites. I decided that i would print out some of story to read over the weekend instead of some Nora Roberts. If you could see my library of book you would take that as the huge compliment it is meant to be.
Author's Response: I am thrilled! I admire Nora Roberts very much and would love to hear her talk about writing one day. She has an incredible way with dialogue and plot! Thank you for wanting to print out the story to read. It\'s like a belated Valentine, all shiny and sweet!
Okay, the nurse...I mean Madam Ratchet thing had me in fits of laughter. I love this chapter, I am so happy for Blaise and Terry.
Author's Response: I had a reader on another site say the \'constant references\' to things outside the HP world were \'distracting\' but I think they fit right in and yet make wonderful people like you laugh, which makes my day! :D
A morning were the warm fuzzies is the first thing you feel has got to be a good day. I love the crocodile bit, it was inspired. Your bard references actually inspired me to re read King Lear and The Tempest this past week. The depth that your characters have is truly amazing.Kudos for another amazing chapter.
Author's Response: Yay, you liked the crocodile bit, and double yay for you reading Shakespeare! I don\'t blame women for falling for his way with words, even if he didn\'t look like Joseph Fiennes in \'Shakespeare in Love\' LOL.
Nope, I agree with you. Loved the chapter.
Author's Response: Thanks!