My name is Teresa. I used to write a lot of fanfic. I still do, and I'm working on posting new stuff.
I love your characterization of Ron. You capture his emotions perfectly. You can see how he feels inferior to Harry. I love you describe him as a pawn, someone in the shadows who rises up to his full pontential. You can his true personality come out. You really get a good look at Ron.
I really loved you characterization of Remus. His reaction to the Snape finding him was perfect. You showed how he was hurt by his friends foolishness. I agree that Remus would be extemely upset by it. Remus was also worried about people finding out he was a werewolf and his reaction fit how he felt perfectly. I liked how you had Lily reach out to him as a sign of friendship. The relationship between the Marauders was well put. Overall, I really enjoyed it.
This was so cute. I've always liked Dumbledore/McGonagall, and I was glad to find this.
I love the use of the socks here. I've always wondered why Dumbledore saw a pair of thick woolen socks in the Mirror, and whether or not he lied about it. The socks were like a symbol of their love. I adore the history behind them. It's so cute that it is a McGonagall women tradition to give their man they love socks.
I thought that the romance was done very well. It didn't feel forced. I think that a lot of romance fics try to force the chracters together too quickly. I think that the romance had a decent amount of backstory, which is really helpful, especially in a one-shot.
I really liked this. I thought that both Dumbledore and McGonagall were IC, and the romance was really nice. Great job.
This is probably my favorite chapter in the entire story. It was very interesting reading about things related to werewolves. I loved the stuff about feral werewolves, and the thing about silver killing a werewolf. It was so interesting to hear all of this.
I loved this chapter. Kane is so evil. It sent chills down my spine reading about Kane taunting Remus about wanting to a feral. I love your characterization of Kane. He is the complete opposite of Remus. Remus is like the good werewolf, while you have Kane who is the perfect example of evil.
I enoyed this chapter. I loved the beginning, with Remus's dream about when he was bitten was briliant and very interesting. I really want to learn more about it.
I got a kick out of this line: Ah, Draco Malfoy. Subtle as a Hungarian Horntail and with almost as much charm. The fireworks, a tribue to Sirius and James, was very touching.
Excellent. It was a great plot. I loved the characerization of Reynard Lupin and Remus. It is one of my favorite stories.
This fic was amazing. It was well-researched and thought out. I really got something special out it.
When I first saw how Goyle wrote his name, I knew he was dyslexic. It was interesting how his tutor didn't even realize this. Either learning disorders are extremely uncommon in the Wizarding World, or the general population is ignorant about them. It really shows how behind the Wizarding World is sometimes. In today's world, teachers are able to recognize these types of things so easily. It's horrible to think that it took until Goyle was fifteen to diagnose the problem.
Goyle's character was amazing. He seemed so sweet. You could really relate to him. When his father was horrible to him, I wanted to jump through the screen and hit the father. I got into the story, and it had a lot to do with Goyle. His character felt three-dimensional here, while in the books he feels like a one-sided character. You did a good job of developing his character in here.
Luna was perfect. Her airiness and wisdom were perfectly captured. I love how she was the one to diagnose Goyle's dyslexia. Luna's kindness is one of her greatest traits. She's nice to Goyle even though his friends(Malfoy) probably made fun of her in the past. It also adds strength to Goyle's character in the way he related to her. It shows how the barriers between the houses can be broken through kindness. I love how Goyle refers to her as an angel. It really seems to fit Luna; she’s definitely an amazing person.
I love Snape's actions throughout the fic. It really shows how nice Snape can be. I loved how in the end, he let Goyle prove how smart he was. It was my favorite part of the story. I think that Snape almost knew that Goyle was dyslexic, and he knew how to teach him. It shows how good of a teacher Snape can be when he wants.
Overall, it was an amazing. It definitely gave me a lesson about Dyslexia, and it's great that you were able to that through this fic.
Wow. I really liked this. I never read Bill/Tonks - I'm a huge Remus/Tonks shipper. After reading this, I want to read more of this pairing.
I like how you used the Order mission situation. Sometimes it can be cliche, but this wasn't. I love Bill's thoughts during it. He seemed IC. It felt like I was reading about Bill Weasley, not some other character.
It was a sad ending. After their moment together, Tonks and Bill have to seperated again. I love how Bill kisses Fleur and hugs his daughter like everything is normal, even though it isn't. It makes sense that everything would be back to normal after the mission. Even though it was sad, it was realistic.
Just a few nit-picks:
She was toweling her hair dry, it was long now...and dark. - I'd use a semicolon instead of a comma.
In a moments irrational action, his ink stained hands were tracing her cheek,
- I think you want a apostrophe after the t in moments.
I really liked this fic overall. You have just made a huge Bill/Tonks fan. Great job!
I really enjoyed your story. I love the perspective that it is told from. I love the ending.
Author's Response: Thank you. I\'m so glad you liked it.
This fic was so sad and so powerful. Genocide is such a horrible and inhumane crime; this did a great job of relating it to the world of Harry Potter.
I loved watching Blaise's changing character. He started off so arrogant and cocky. He irrationally hated Muggle-borns for no reason other than that he was told to. I love his reaction to pictures of African Americans in South; it made it very real to him, the idea that he could be victim. His change was so real, and it showed that with education, people can change and end the horrors of the world.
I love how you used fanfiction to get a message across. Blaise's growth shows how education can make people more aware of the world around them. Hermione's teaching Blaise shows someone not succumbing to hatred, but standing up against it. The message is very powerful, and reading it in fanfiction makes it more real sometimes; that even in a magical world, hate still exists. Seeing Blaise and Hermione working together to try and end the persecution of Muggle-borns is a great example of teamwork.
Thanks for writing such an amazing fic. I really enjoyed it.
I read your entire at ff.net and I loved it. It was just as good as Oblivious, maybe even better. I loved reading about Lupin family. I really enjoyed it.
I really loved your characterization of both McGonagall and Snape.
I loved how McGonagall was the one to reach out to Snape. It is in her character because even though she may seem very strict on the outside, inside she's a softy. You potrayed this side of her very well.
I also loved your characterization of Snape. You capture his personality through his words and actions. I thought that this line particularly described him well. He turned to face her, his eyes glittering with pain and anger. "Hope -- that when the Dark Lord at last faces his enemy, I will again be worthy to stand by his side. And that my master -- " He snarled the word. " -- will find it difficult to focus his attention with a potion-maker's silver knife between his ribs." It captured his hate and rage. I also loved this line also. Minerva gave herself a few mental kicks. She had not had a real opponent in months, and had also somehow forgotten two crucial things about Severus. One was that his game was rarely what it seemed. The other was that his glare was the closest thing he had to a friendly expression, and that if he truly minded losing pieces he would have sneered.
Overall, I loved your characterization of both characters.
Author's Response: Thanks! Without the winter challenges Magical Maeve set last year, I never would have dreamed this one up -- she tosses out good bunnies. Somehow these two characters have a good chemistry, I think. They\'re different enough to be interesting, with just enough in common to mostly understand each other.
Wow! I love your story. I can't want for you to update it.
I love the Black sisters, though Narcissa was never my favorite. I guess it was all the fics where she was the too perfect pureblood wife. Considering that her sisters don't seem the fit the mold of the perfect pureblood wife - Bella's one of the few female Death Eaters and Andromeda married a muggle-born - it makes sense that Narcissa wouldn't either. This story showed differently.
First, I loved Narcissa's desire to be independent, to have her own destiny. In so many Lucius/Cissy romances, Cissy seems to love being this perfect pureblood wife. It is interesting to read her when she doesn't want to. “I understand the importance of being a Black, but what if there is more than this? Do you really enjoy being restricted to the point…to the point of…to the point of not being able to breathe? Don’t you feel like you are missing something?” asked Narcissa, shaking her head desperately. I think that really brings out her character. The image of being restricted so much that you can't breather is something that is so powerful. It must be horrible to have no choice in your fate, and as a reader, I felt sorry for Narcissa.
Her first talk with Lucius with interesting. Lucius felt trapped by his destiny, but unlike Cissy, he took it without complaint. It's such a contrast to Cissy's feelings, yet Lucius really seems to relate to her. I love how he cares for her well being. Even though they don't each other that well, it was sweet that Lucius would sit there and listen to her. In the books, you never feel sorry for him. But here, I really wanted to give him a hug. The last line of this scene - “Let’s go inside, you’re freezing out here.” - was so sweet. Even though he didn't get its real meaning, it was still nice that he thought about how she was feeling.
I loved the scene where Narcissa tells the house elf to put up the Christmas decorations. She seems to be different from the rest of her family here with her liking of all the festivities. Grimmauld Place was so dark and gloomy.
The party scene was good. The part with Mr. Malfoy was a bit iffy to me. I don't know whether he would come up Narcissa in the middle of a party and tell her that she was going to marry Lucius. I always thought that Lucius had a lot of tact in the way he did all of his dirty doings. I thought that his father would be the same, not directly telling Narcissa she was marrying but kind of pushing the two to dance with each other.
The scene where Narcissa and Lucius was dancing was nicely done. I loved Lucius' increasing frustration. I think it made that Narcissa would talk out on him. It felt realistic.
I loved how Lucius went after Narcissa. It was so nice to see how much he cared about her. It was very romantic. I liked what Lucius said about destiny. It contrasted nicely with what Narcissa had about being trapped and forced to do things. It was also very romantic. At the same as telling her to accept her destiny, he was complimenting on how wonderful she is. Very Lucius-like.
I loved the ending. It said a lot about pureblood society. The reason it has continued, like a lot of other things, is because the people involved thought that it supposed to make them happy.
The Narcissa/Lucius romance fit nicely into the story. It didn't seem forced. It was natural and real. The fact that both seemed to have a lot of doubts about they were doing was perfect. No one at sixteen is going to feel comfortable about getting married to someone they don't even know that well.
I love the Black family, and I loved this fic. Nice job!
Author's Response: Thank you for the thorough and amazing review! I haven\'t had such an in-depth one since I left SPEW! Thank you so much for all your input and nice comments. I\'m not worthy!
I adored this. I have never read Remus/Lily, but they are so cute in here!
I was surprised that Remus was left alone at Hogwarts. I thought that he would go with James and Sirius if it wasn't the full moon. Even though it is, I thought that at least one of them would stay. But then would ruin the plot of this story, which was really good apart from that part.
I thought that it was so sweet that Remus went to help Professor Kettleburn with the Salamanders just he so he could be with Lily. It sounds just like Remus to do something like that. Everything does he does for a reason, and it makes sense that he would do something like that. It also typical teenage boy who likes a girl; they'll do anything as long as they are with them. It's adorable!
I felt so sorry for Remus after he told Lily that he couldn't do Prefect duty. You can tell that Remus is so upset. It's a good sign that when you're reading, you want to come in and say something to the character. Here, I just wanted to give Remus a hug, and slap the full moon.
I really loved the ending. I thought that it was so sweet that Lily gave Remus a Christmas present. It's so nice that Lily cared that much about Remus. I loved the ending. It makes sense that Remus would give up Lily for James. Remus cares about others well-being above his own. Doing that is noble and self-sacrificing, both of which Remus definitely is.
I loved this. It was a wonderful little romance that was fluffy but not too fluffy that really warms a person's heart.
Author's Response: Aw, Teresa, thank you so much for your lovely review! And, well, I needed Remus to be alone for the Christmas hols, so I figured I would make the other Marauders leave him at Hogwarts. I have this feeling that Remus and the rest of the Marauders sort of fell apart in their later years at Hogwarts or after leaving school because Sirius suspected Remus to be the one that betrayed the Potters. So I thought it would be okay if he would be alone at Hogwarts. Thanks once again for your review, dear! I\'m glad you liked it. *huggles*
I love your story. I can't wait to see what happens next chapter.
Author's Response: Hopefully that\'ll ve soon. Thank you!
Wow. I loved it. Poor Ariel, though. I'm a little curious about Bahir. Another great chapter.
Author's Response: We\'re all curious about Bahir >.> Thanks for the review!
I really liked it. It was very interesting hearing about everything that has happened through a phoenix's eye. You don't realize how much they've really seen, being alive for so many years. I like how you put his perspective on many things, like on Harry and Dumbledore. It really interested me.
Author's Response: I\'m glad that you found it interesting and compelling. I did try to make it that way. Fawkes ought to be an interesting character, and he isn\'t used as often as he could be in fanfiction. Thanks for reading!
This was really interesting. I've never considered that Blaise/Hermione as a pairing. After reading this, it makes sense that they could have a relationship.
The first thing I noticed was that you used the present tense. I don't write a lot of present, only sometimes in the first person. I never thought that it would work well with the third person. After reading this, I knew I was wrong. It was really good, and flowed nicely.
I thought that Blaise and Hermione were both IC. You could see the Slytherin in Blaise. He didn't feel overly romantic, just right. I like how the war seems to take it toll on him. It wouldn't be realistic if it didn't. I love Hermione goes to Italy for awhile afterward. She suffered a huge loss in Harry's death; it makes sense that she would want to get away from all that.
I really liked this fic. I have to read more of your writing.