I am a 40-something Harry Potter NUT. I live in Illinois with my husband, daughter and son. I teach daycare during the day and work overnights on weekends. Most of the remainder of my awake time is spent floating around the queue and just trying to keep up with life.
Safe Haven is my very first fanfic so we'll see how it is received since it is *not* HBP or (obviously) DH compliant. Please remember this when reading my story as it will make it easier to grasp certain aspects of it.
That's my girl! Awesome job on your assignment, Sarah!
I would say more but it would take from the PM review I left you as well. It's been so long since I have done one of those, I thought I owed it to you. See you on the forums!
Author's Response: *huggles* Thanks so much, Nicole! I loved the PM review too. I hope the prof liked it too!
There are not many people who I would read poetry for, let alone about Bella so feel privilaged... It was very well written, regardless of my ranting and raving. So simple yet complete. Nice job, Elle. I wish I could write more but I think that sums it up for now.
Author's Response: Thank you, Nicole. I\'m glad you liked it. And I\'m honored that you would read Bella related poetry for me.
Oh Elle... You continue to keep me in awe of your writing abilities. Not to mention the fact that you *completed* the WHOLE THING and you did it in style. So many doors but you made each one a completely different adventure. I LOVED what you did with her conversation with Sirius. It was refreshing to hear him say he forgave her and then have him help her out. The mirror showing his family was great but the fact that she could hold each one and speak to them was heartwarming. (granted I don't know what all the prompts were as I didn't make it through)
It's nice to see a happy ending for Bella.
Author's Response: Poor Bella, I usually give her such a hard time. I need to give her a happy ending every once in awhile. I really do love her.
Anyway, thank you so much for the compliments and I\'m thrilled that you enjoyed the story. Sirius was my favorite part of the story as well. I loved being able to throw him in there like that. :D
Ahhh, Jacie... First of all, might I say that I LOVE the way you brought in more than one person? When I first noticed, I was wondering how you would keep the focus on Neville but you did it and you did it with style. Secondly, I was so very impressed on your use of inferi. I always forget about them! It kept up the pace of the story and made me grasp the endge of my (keyboard) with white knuckles. I look forward to the next chapter.
Oh, yeah... Multiple chapter reviews for my Slyths... *winks*
Author's Response: Hey, Nicole!
As I said before, I do best writing dialogue, so bringing in more than one person was a must for me. Plus, it would be a lot more boring otherwise. The Inferi was something that just came to me. I was listening to Marilyn Manson at the time, so I guess I can see why...
- Jacie the Cat
Okay, before I start I should warn you that I have not read the other reviews. That being said, was this purposly typed this way:
Neville pulled out his wand as the neared the door, as did Hermione.
*Did you mean "Neville pulled out his wand as HE (or) THEY neared the door.(?)*
My favorite line spoken was when Hermione offered to fix his tooth in the midst of the chaos they were going through... true Hermione! Bringing in the use of Fred and George's product was brilliant, by the way. I also loved how you brough Draco's dark side out a bit. Sorry this is so jumbled but I am excited to read the next chapter!
*runs to next page*
Author's Response: Oh, that was just something that I missed in proofreading.. *runs to fix*
Wow! I wasn\'t sure anyone would notice those little things I put in there. I did want to have a bit of Hermione\'s character coming out amongst the chaos.
- Jacie the Cat
Holy cow, that had a lot going on... I can't believe you killed Ron! *sniffles* (this is why I would be useless in SPEW) I had been waiting to see how you would seperate everyone and now I eagerly await to see the fate of our remaining travellers.
The dragon was a great touch. *wishes my version wasn't so narrowly written* Your imagination astounds me, Jace. Now, off to chapter 4! woohoo!
Author's Response: I\'m sorry, Nicole.. I just never liked him... and he had it coming....
- Jacie the Cat
A rabbit, huh? Interesting. The interaction between Neville and his Patronus was amusing but my favorite part by far was Hermione's description of what she found behind the doors... That was hilarious! Also, I usually have a difficult time following action sequences as intense as the ones you have written but you made them flow quite nicely!
Author's Response: Ha! I do admit, that the rabbit part was fun to write. And I wanted a little more Hermione-ness in there.
- Jacie the Cat
Oooh, that gave me shivers. It was nice to see them after the fact as epilogues are often times my favorite oart of the stories. They can tie up loose ends and you did that for the reader here. I liked how they changed their mind about going to see Harry, hehe. I enjoy the friendship you are establishing between Hermione and Neville also, not making them romantically involved (yet) but giving them that common bond.
Very impressive story, Jacie! Best of luck!!
Author's Response: Shivers? Wow... Never done that before..
With them changing their mind, it was more of them trying to feel more normal again. See, they thought that they would feel better of they just stayed in, not interacting with anyone, but then why did they even come back? I wanted to give that a bit more explaining, but I played the subtlety card instead.
And as for the romance thing... That\'s not happening. *sees a new bunny in corner of his mind\'s eye*
Well, not in this story anyways..
Thank you so much for these reviews, Nicole. They really brightened my otherwise cloudy day. It\'s actually one of the few times I\'ve smiled all day, reading your reviews. I can\'t thank you enough
- Jacie the Cat
*snickers* I loved that. I didn't get to see the finished product. (I ended at the point where Dumbledore leaves her still sleeping.) I loved how you brough the Gauntlet into this... literally! How Slytherinny of you. It's almost like an inside joke for any of us who have attempted or made it through the Gauntlet on the forums. Nice job.
Author's Response: smiles and hugs!! Thank you so much!!!
I don’t think so.She would be a Slytherin Princess, still as golden, only more cunning and less conventional.
In this story, let her teach you in gaining influence over the very people who crave it.LucillaJoanna of Hufflepuff is here playing Lachesis for the May One-Shot Challenge...
...And won Second Place!(Rating only for mild language)
Excellent job. I LOVED how well you took each (book) and walked the reader through each one, keeping it canon. The best part was watching the relationship between the two (D/Hr) grow in a very realistic way, bringing them together in the end in a way that was refreshing and new. It was something that should have been predicatable but - for me anyways - it was a pleasant surprise. As I said above, excellent job. Best of luck in the challenge.
Author's Response: oh, thank you, nicole! i myself was giddy when the idea came to me. seven tips, seven books, so there you go... hey, you too, good luck with the challenge.
(This will not be SPEW quality, by the way as I am still recovering from the shock.)
Holy Salazar, Laur... that was awesome! I did good - I didn't cry (which is a feat, considering) and I must say that you had be in the dark until the very end.
Dumbledore... Whodathunk?!? Once you revealed who they were, I thought back through the story and let out a general, "Oooohhhhhhh... I get it now."
You are so lucky to have a beta so close at hand, hehe. Anywhoo, great job my dear and I look forward to conspiring with you in the future. *winks*
Author's Response: NIKKI! *tacklehugs* I\'m glad you liked it, and I\'m glad I didn\'t make the pregnant woman cry :) & speaking of pregnant women, I am very lucky to have a beta so close, even if she is a pain in the buttocks. <3!
You know, whenever I beta read a story for other people, the one thing I find myself preaching about is the lack of descriptive details and how easy it is to just write something that contains nothing but dialogue. Obviously, written in the way that you have yours done, dialogue really isn't an issue but, my gosh Evie, the first few paragraphs BLEW me away. It was so beautifully written, I couldn't felp but reread them several times. Your writing style in this fanfic is like a drug - very easy to get drawn into and you just can't seem to get enough once you have experienced it.
It was just an added bonus that you used my absolute favorite poem of all time! *grins* (I memorized it in the 8th grade)
I love how you took each stanza of the poem and made it into something so totally yours and very unique. It was great how one who is familiar with the poem could see it throughout your story. I think one of the coolest parts was the way that, in the beginning everything was so serene and peaceful. As the story concluded, the scenery was still there (and still beautiful in its own ways) but it was not as majestic as it was before the "gold" was gone.
Incredible work, my dear. Absolutely amazing.
*was very tempted to leave a 'It's great. I love it' review, just for laughs*
Author's Response: Nicole!! **Loveth** What did I do to deserve so many lovely reviews from you? :D **huggles** Thank you so much - I love this poem to, I have it written all over my school books and stuff. ;) Thank you again!!! ~Evie
*giggles with wild glee!!!*
I LOVED this story, Sarah!!! It's been so long since I have visted anyone's author's page, I didn't know you had this one here. Forgive me?
When I read the description of the story, I was worried that a lot of Draco's temper would be shown and then he would do the :I'm sorry, please take me back" speech. Thank you for proving me wrong.
It was refreshing to see Draco so carefree and it was a nice change of pace to read about his relationship with Cissy as a child as I have not read much of anything in that area. The way you brought Lucius into each memory was an excellent transition, bringing him back to present day. It was very believable and therefore easy to visualize.
As far as the challenge goes, I love the way you brought his memory of proposing to *hugs* Hermione in so that he could produce a successful Patronus. It seemed fitting to his character that he would have to use a different memory each time. He's so high maintenance as a rule, hehe.
Excellent job my dear!
Wow, Elle... I didn't know you had it in you, hehe. I'm not used to you writing my Draco! Let's see here...
I appreciate the way you showed how each of the two main characters showed such great pride in their families and the values they held. I also respect the fact that you kept them in canon and didn't pull one of those, "Draco decided 'to hell with the Dark Lord' and wanted to spend the rest of his life with Susan who looked more beautiful than ever in the moonlight as it shone through the classroom door..." *gag*
I think the only thing that threw me for a loop was Draco's personality. He was under a LOT of stress by that point in the book (if I am on the same page, hehe) and I'm not sure he would have taken the time to find her and apologize for his behavior. Don't get me wrong - I LOVE that he did that in your story. I personally am partial to seeing Draco written with some sort of conscience but it just kind of took me a minute to grasp what was going on. *hopes I am making sense* It was refreshing to see his thoughts regarding Bella (in true Elle persistance) and how he showed her in a more positive light which most people never see or even think to show in stories.
Nice job, my Modly one.
Author's Response: *hugs Nicole*
Thanks so much.
Hmm...you have a good point about Draco\'s stress level, but in a way, I think he just needed someone to talk to.
Thanks again! *more hugs*
Awesome, Sarah. It's a wonderful change of pace from the Dramione we all love. It's nice to see this side of your writing. I wish I could give you a SPEW-type of review but... yeah. (tis why I am not a member) I'll save it for a future PM review.
Good job my dear.
Author's Response: Yay Nicole! *huggles* Thank you for the lovely review!
OH. MY. SALAZAR. Evie, that was one of the most heart-wrenching, most incredible stories I have read on the site in a long time and I must say . . . if you don't place in this . . . I will cry. I *did* cry, actually, as I saw the interaction between Harry and Lily. Knowing the inevitable was coming and then watching as Harry asks his mother questions about how his family will fare once he is gone. *quiver*
You know what really sealed the story for me? When you mention the plate of roasted chestnuts falling and shattering on the floor. It was so final, but having Harry and Lily walk away together once he understood he would be reunited with Ginny and his loved ones, it made it very appropriate.
Absolutely fabulous piece of work, Evie. I could learn a thing or two from you, that's for sure. Best of luck in the challenge! *hugs*
PS: The only constructive piece I could think of is in your end Author's note. I find it more productive to read AND review than to read A review, personally. You might want to fix that! :-)
Author's Response: NICOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! **tacklehugs** You have no idea how warm and fuzzly and full of Slytherin pride that made me feel!! Thank you so much!!! :D Heh. I will go fix that now. :o ~Evie
I must say this was a very powerful piece of work. I don't generally read poetry but I cam across this for an assignment and I was hooked right away.
It amazed me how the two sides were saying things which were both parallel in thought and polar opposite in belief. Such simple phrases but a simple sentence spoke a thousand words for the characters who were living through the battle.
Let the fallen block their pathways,
Let the laughter break them apart,
Let the mercilessness show our beings,
Let death stop every heart.
I liked this stanza (?) because the reader really can't tell which side it is coming from. It brought it all together for me.
Great job. I will continue to look for your work in the future!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review Nicole! I\'m glad you liked this piece ^^\r\n\r\nThat one stanza you mentioned-- I meant to write it from the DE\'s p.o.v., but I see where you\'re coming from. I appreciate the feedback!
A witch is born. She already has opinions.
Alternate-universe only in that it disregards Pottermore information on Minerva's parentage.
So, I was the mod who approved your story here and I must come clean. First and foremost, had I not been in the queue moderating the stories which had been sitting for a while, I NEVER would have picked this one to just sit and read. Rarely do I willingly pick up something going that far back; I think I have read maybe two stories centering around Minerva. Ever. Regardless, I paroosed through your little one-shot here and as the reviewer above me said, "I was smiling." It was so much fun to see the interaction within such a loving family, all within just one chapter, and you closed it up so nicely in the end. You did an amazing job and I have it bookmarked and I am also recommending it to my Slyths. (I'm their HoH here on the boards)
Author's Response: Thank you so much! It's really lovely when someone for whom a story wouldn't ordinarily be "quite their cup of tea" reads it and enjoys it. I've had some of my best reading experiences when I venture outside my "normal" circle of preferences. Thanks for modding!
I stumbled upon this while moderating stories and I am so glad I did! This was so simple to follow and I really enjoyed it . . . and I am NOT a fan of poetry (usually) so that's an accomplishment right there. I especially liked the part about biding his time for a bigger office. It really remonstrated growth, emotionally, on his part towards the end. Nice job!
Author's Response: Thanks so much for writing a review, NikkiSue. The poetry I write is always "accessible", so feel free to go ahead and read it. There are poems on my thread in Poetry, Anyone? that are not submitted to the archives yet.