I'm a thirtysomething mom of 3 who uses HP as an escape. I'm thoroughly addicted. I've got strong opinions on characterization, and I've become an ardent H/G fan since Order of the Phoenix.
If you're a fan of TSH - Potterficweekly.com is starting weekly podcasts on 6/8/2007 discussing the fic before the release of Deathly Hallows. There is a forum where you can leave comments to be discussed. I hope to see you there!
Summary: Since the tragedy at the Astronomy Tower, Harry has become an even more formidable wizard, but a shocking revelation may mean the difference between life and death for The Boy Who Lived. It is the final stage of Harry's quest to destroy Lord Voldemort - can he save the Wizarding World and those he loves from the treachery of the Dark Lord... and also save himself? [Action takes place in media res towards the end of Harry's Seventh Year at Hogwarts (Post-HBP).]
Great job! I loved to see the arrival of the DA, and the dialog you used was really moving.
I particularly loved Harry's reaction to hearing what's going on with Lupin, and the line "I"m braver when you're with me". Really nicely done.
Now, Bella is alive (yay, she needs a better end) but we've lost a lot of DEs and none of the Order it seems? I'm not rooting for you to kill off characters, obviously, but I hope you'll make it realistic. The good guys will have losses, too.
Now, do we get to see what happens between Grayback and Lupin? I love the idea of the two werewolves fighitn with Lupin protecting his "cub".
Author's Response: Thanks so much, Melindaleo! The dialogue was fun to write, and I hope it shows. As for the losses - I am in total agreement with you. It's one of the reasons why I had to take Harry away from the platform. As I mentioned, this is the chapter just before the other shoe drops, so things are going to get a little hairy ahead; fatalities on both sides for sure. I'm also REALLY looking forward to posting the chapter where Harry witnesses Lupin and Greyback's fight - it's actually a major plotpoint, so yes, we can all look forward to that as well ;).
Wow, very intense. There was a whole lot of redemption going on here, and while I enjoyed each one individually, overall I think it might be too much to expect.
I groaned when Harry didn't get to tell Ginny he loved her, but that alone gave me more hope than the rest combined. I was beginning to think it might be time for me to bail (I always bail before I'll read Harry's death, lol) but not telling Ginny perked me up. Somehow, I think he'll still get the chance.
I'm eagerly anticipating the fight with Voldemort.
Author's Response: lol - I admit I probably could have drawn out the redemption scenes, but I've been in such a rush to get to the final battle, I honestly didn't give it a second thought! As to the other stuff -- well, we've already discussed that privately. No need to spoil it for the others, eh? ;) Thanks :D
Oooh, the Inferi! Rubs hands with glee. Great battle scene, and I liked the addition of Grawp. I also really liked the comparison to Harry's reaction after losing Cedric. I can't wait for more.
Author's Response: Thanks! I'm particularly fond of the death scene for that reason. For the first time, Harry's a spectator to someone else's grief, and that implicit connection he feels there is actually pretty important to what lies ahead ;).
Groan. I do so hate redeemed Malfoy - he's such a git. Great tension here though, but I hate the plan. I wouldn't trust either Snape nor Malfoy as far as I could throw them. The end Snape has planned for Harry sounds ominous, but I'm holding out hope. I'll give fair warning though - I always bail before I have to read Harry's death. Nope - won't do that.
Great cliffy, and I love the image of all this going on under the glard of the dark mark. The No Survivor rule is chilling, as well.
Author's Response: lol :) Thanks Melindaleo! I'll say this much. Granted, Malfoy and Harry are on the same side now, but that does not change Malfoy's nature in any way. He's in this for his own ends - his family wellbeing is at stake. Harry only matters to him insofar as he can help the Malfoy's out of a sticky spot. So yeah - Malfoy's only *partially* redeemed. As for the bad plan, I will also just say that Snape reveals only what Harry needs to know at the moment he needs to know it. There's more up Snape's sleeve ;).
Oh, and as for Harry's death, please don't be afraid to read ahead! I can't say more without giving things away, but I promise there is a happy ending! Cheers!
Yikes! Excellent chapter! Super cliffy, too. Yikes. They are in big trouble now, aren't they? What was Ginny doing? I liked that you kept Malfoy wimpy, but I hope Ginny at least pays him back for torturing Harry. Harry's scar not burning is curious. Hmmm, what is he up to?
Author's Response: *Wrings hands deviously* Oh yeah, the stuff's about to hit the fan ;). Voldy's not a happy camper.
Really nice start to your story. I loved the ending - so Harrylike, but Hermione is right, he needs his allies. I can't even say Harry is wrong though, Voldemort doesn't tolerate "spares". Very gripping stuff. I liked Harry's thoughts at the beginning as he reminisced about his final year at Hogwarts.
You didn't say why he, Ron and Hermione went back, however? The one bit of constructive criticism I'd give - and ignore it if you'd like - is that Harry and Ginny seem very OOC being awkward with each other. JKR set them up as understanding each other better than anyone else, and that didn't play here. I read your reviews that you based their break up on personal experience, which generally is a great way to write, but you have to take into consideration the personalities of your players. That didn't feel right for them at all.
Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you enjoyed the ending - I was definitely going for putting Harry in a tight spot - I promise things will turn out for the best in the chapters ahead!
As for Harry and Ginny's dynamic, I am adding a special author's note about it shortly, so check back. I think it'll clear up the issue (seems a lot of readers have been rather passionate about it...)
OH, bravo! I got the update for the story, but it wasn't approved yet. Thanks for the reminder. You know me - I simply couldn't read the last one,but this one is perfect. I loved Harry's meeting with DD, and I love his choice even more. He so deserves to live. I like the idea of going through the water to return, and while he was walking on it, his fear of stepping in the wrong place was right on. Well done.
Wow, great chapter. The battle with the Inferi was dramatic and intense and highly enjoyable. I loved Harry's anxiety about losing that amulet, too. Using the paint was great, and I loved Hagrid's refusal to leave them behind.
Malfoy. I liked how in character you kept him even though he was helping Harry. Not many people can pull that off, so kudos. While I don't for a second believe canon Malfoy is a werewolf, it works nicely for your story. The only problem is that Wolfsbane would not have stopped his transformation, merely made him docile until the moon had passed.
Author's Response: Many thanks for your review :). I knew that Werewolf!Malfoy would be the biggest stretch I've made thus far - but I figured it wouldn't be too bad considering his mysterious condition in HBP, you know? Either way, I'm so glad you thought it worked :). Cheshlin brought up the problem with Wolfsbane, so I'm gonna try to spend a little time today fixing that issue (there's a charm to turn a werewolf back into a man, but I just want to make it convincing that the charm could last an entire night). In any case, thanks again!
Great, tense, exciting chapter. I'm not sure about Harry announcing to everyone about the Horcruxes like that though, since he wouldn't even tell McGonagall. Regardless though, I loved Harry's running, jumping Diaperating, and I love that Snape seems so loathsome. Good stuff here. I also enjoyed the warm reception from Molly.
Author's Response: Thanks again Melindaleo! It was tough plotting out the action - it was literally like choreographing a dance at times. And yeah, Snape will be getting a little juicier in chapters ahead, so I'm hoping that'll be great fun once I get to it. As for Harry's announcement - I'm not sure if I conveyed it correctly, but the only people who were paying attention to Harry at the moment were McGonagall and Lupin - everyone else is too preoccupied with fighting, healing, or trying not to die ;). Harry's a little less concerned with who knows at this point - he's got few precious hours left to deal with Voldemort and rid himself of the Horcrux inside him before morning. Considering how things have been unfolding, he could use all the help he can get! Anyhoo, as always, thanks so much for sticking with the story and for your fantastic review :).
Wow! Strong stuff. I've seen this theory before, and to be honest, I can easily argue both sides depending on which way the other person goes. After reading this, I'm on the side that Harry's not a Horcrux, but if you'd said he wasn't , I would have argued that he was. It's such a great idea to comtemplate. I LOVED Harry's reaction to the new. It was wonderfully understated and so him. I agree that Snape was acting on DDs orders, but it doesn't make me like him any more. He's a good guy, but he's not a nice guy.
Author's Response: Thanks so much! I tell you, JKR gave me a run for my money with all the questions HBP raised. I must be absolutely out of my mind to write this fic! Anyhoo, I hope it was entertaining if still a bit underdeveloped, but luckily there are more chapters to come to flesh it out a bit better :). Cheers!
Aww, I liked that last bit there. Poor, Harry. There has to be a way to destroy the soul part of Voldemort, and still leave Harry alive, otherwise how will he kill Voldemort? Hmmm. Exciting stuff. I'm glad they told Ginny everything.
Author's Response: Thanks, Melindaleo! 'Poor Harry' is right. The good news is that the ending is already written; it's ridiculous how much time I've spent putting together the scene where Harry and Voldemort finally duel considering all the factors involved (ie: wands/horcruxes/character deaths/redemptive moments). Krikey. I'm giving a heckuvalot away there, aren't I... ;) Thanks again!
Summary: We've all seen many versions of the rest of Harry and Ginny's day after their first public kiss in Gryffindor Tower. But what about Ron? How did he react to this startling turn of events? Read on and find out.
First fic? Really? Wow! I thought it was great and blended seemlessly with canon. You really had Ron down very well, and Hermione's gentle reasoning with him was well done. Nice job.
Author's Response: Hey, I was hoping you might read my story! You are one of my favorite authors! I'm really excited to get a good word from you, and hope I can keep making my readers happy. Thank you very much!
Summary: Dumbledore is gone, or is he? Harry feels the weight of the world rests on his shoulders, but he is soon to learn that his brooding nature and desire to face his fate alone may be his greatest weakness. It is his emotions, or rather his capacity for emotion that makes him strong, and his relationships his greatest source of strength.
When the summer begins and he faces a fortnight with the Dursleys everything he knows, or rather thinks he knows comes into question. Can he... should he do this all alone? And is he anywhere near ready?
Hogwarts is to be re-opened, the Ministry officially endorsing it as the safest possible place to be. As his birthday approaches there are monumental surprises in store for Harry. Who is he really? And what about his family, who came before his mother and father? Why is the Potter name so famous, and yet so unknown?
Encouraged not to run off to face his fate he returns to Hogwarts for his final year, but surprises abound at the school as well.
Can Harry become the wizard he needs to be to face the Dark Lord? Will he let the people he respects and love really help him? And what of help from unexpected sources; sources he might never trust?
Well, I suspected this was where you were going, but I'm sorry to see it. I'd really thought this one had a lot of potential.
In my opinion, that money was supposed to be for Harry's care, and I tend to think even if they had it, it wouldn't have been spent on Harry. By giving it to them now, I feel like it's rewarding them and condoning the abuse. Now, I can easily see Harry going all noble and simply walking away, but by rewarding them this way, I think it makes Harry look like a pushover.
I wish you well, but I think I'll pass on this one. Sorry.
Author's Response: Well, I am sorry to hear that. You will be missed… and not just because you are a reader who actually reviews, but because you are an author whose stories I have enjoyed, and a person whose opinion I respect. In this case however, I guess we will have to agree to disagree.
You obviously see this issue as being all about how the Dursley’s have treated Harry, and what they deserve. Because you see the Dursleys as undeserving (an opinion I share by-the-way) you see Harry’s position on the money as weakness. I believe I can understand that, however it is not how I see it at all.
For me this issue is not about what the Dursleys deserve, or do not deserve, but instead it is all about Harry, and what kind of a person he is, and I am sorry, but I would never describe him as a push-over, nor to I believe the actions I have written make him such.
Harry is a hero, and his actions need to be heroic… or if not heroic… certainly not base and petty. He doesn’t think the Dursleys deserve this money any more that you or I… but he really doesn’t care about this money… it is representative of a time and a people he desires to put behind him. If Harry had any need for the money… then of course he would be right to keep it. But, he has the fortune from his parents, and the Black fortune which many fans speculate was greater than his inheritance from his parents.
The point is, that Harry is compassionate, and while he cares little for the Dursleys, he understands the way in which his very existence has been a threat to them, and completely changed their lives to as much effect, as his being there changed his. The cause and effect equation here is far more complicated than [Harry was left on their doorstep + The Dursleys abuse Harry = The Dursleys are bad people and deserve nothing].
For me, Harry is giving over the money because:
1. The Durselys have an apparent need.
2. He doesn’t need it, and in fact has very little concept about how much it is, or what it really means.
3. He may not like them… but he doesn’t hate them.
4. To deny the Dursleys the money would be an act of vengeance – Maybe not legally, not even morally as the terms of the account clearly make it his by default, but if we eliminate the need for, or even a greedy desire for the money as a motivation, what other motivation would he have to say no, except some desire to get back at them? Which I am, as the author saying he doesn’t have.
Harry knows that the Dursleys would see it that way, and he has no desire to bring about further ire from them so close to being done with them forever. (Which of course begs the question – will he actually be done with them forever?)
If the money was significant to him in any way he would act differently. To you or I or to the few people who will ever read this story, it may be a lot of money… To Harry it is nothing. In my opinion.
Anyway, I am not certain that you will even return to read this response as your passion on the issue seems rather intense, and I guess you have written the story off now as a matter of principle, but I wish you would reconsider and follow it a bit longer anyway. As a possible enticement I will tell you this; I agree that the Dursleys are undeserving, scared and petty characters who represent some of the worst characteristics of humanity, or Muggledom, if you prefer… But it is not for Harry to judge them, judgment lies in the hands of a higher being (insert whatever higher power you choose to believe in) Just because I didn’t have Harry condemn them, and he has essentially handed them an opportunity for a truly financially unfettered life. I don’t for a minute think such characters would have the foresight or understanding to put this gift to good use. I rather believe Harry has handed them, what in their hands is a curse. I have some further plans for the Dursleys before the story ends… and I have a feeling they may just be more in line with what you… and many others think they truly deserve.
So, like I said earlier, you will be missed. And, if ultimately you choose to overlook my choice as an author and continue reading, despite your distaste for this particular turn of events, you will be greatly appreciated.
Thanks for everything! P.S. If you ever care to roll the issue around some more and toss it back and forth a little I am open to any dialogue… I am even, quite open to having my mind changed by a good compelling argument. My e-mail works.
Okay, now, I know I had several comments to make as I read through this chapter, but I find I'm so enraged by the ending that I can't think straight. You did manage to extract wonderful emotion from me, although I'm not sure if it's the emotions you were seeking.
The thought that Petunia gets that money now sickens me. That money was for HARRY. It was money to reimburse them for his care and wellbeing. They provided nothing of the sort, so they forfeit the right to any reimbursement now. I know most people tend to write Venon as the real bad guy, but personally, I think Petunia is much worse. Harry is her own flesh and blood, and she allowed the treatment to continue for his entire life. She's despicable. I dont believe for a minute that if she HAD had access to that money, that even a pense would have actually been spent on Harry. Please, don't let the Dursleys get their hands on that money. Let Harry use it to buy some decent clothes and to never have to worry about being hungry again. Let the Dursleys manage on their own - it's what they left Harry to do from the time he was 15 months old.
Author's Response: Wow. I am expecting strong reaction to the whole issue of money, but you are obviously quite passionate about it! Okay… well, I am not going to tell you what happens, you’ll have to read the next chapter for that, but I can tell you I hope to get more reviews and more opinions, and maybe… just maybe I will let that effect the outcome. On the other hand, I don’t want to hold off the next chapter too long. I think the delay in this one was quite enough and I want to get really moving on this story. I am re-writing the next chapter now though due to a canon mistake caught by my wonderful new Beta reader, so if I get a barrage of review opinions that differ insistently with my own thought processes one way or the other, I will definitely consider the merit of majority opinion. As it is right now, only my Beta reader knows what I have already written.
When you remember all the other things you wanted to say about the chapter, definitely send another review. I love to hear what people think, and I respect differences of opinion and thinking. I may not write everything just as you would like, but that is the beauty of Fan Fiction isn’t it? So many possibilities! I only hope that you will like the story enough that you will keep reading.
Thank you so much for the review.
NIce job, and brilliant stroke with the Chocolate frog card. I'm glad to see that you're leaning toward patching up Harry and Ginny. I don't think canon will be as quick - but that's what I want to see in fanfiction ;) I wonder, did DD talk Harry out of allowing Ron and Hermione to accompany him to Privet Drive? I must confess, that is one of the things I'm most eagerly anticipating from book 7. I'm an older writer, too, and I tend to enjoy stories by other adults, so thanks for alertying me to this one. I'll be awaiting the next update.
Author's Response: Thank you. Most everyone seems to like the enchanted Chocolate Frog Base idea. I am rather pleased about that. I have had several people suggest that DD was killed so that Harry would learn to stand on his own two feet, and I don’t disagree, all I can say is, keep reading. Most people grow up just fine without having all the adults they depend on killed off. Harry is more independent then most kids already, by far. You ask if DD talked Harry out of having Ron and Hermione over to Privet Drive, and I suppose he did. I didn’t write that exchange obviously, but I figure basically DD is saying. Okay Harry, slow down, a lot has happened very fast and lets not react harshly, or to hastily. Let’s plan a little carefully. So, the conclusion was that there is a little time to work things out and get the Privet Drive visit over with as quickly and easily as possible because it has to be done. But don’t worry there is a lot that is going to happen. Thanks so much for the review!
Summary: Dumbledore’s gone and Harry, Ron and Hermione have returned to Privet Drive to start their search for the Horcruxes. Their plan not to return to Hogwarts is changed with the reading of Dumbledore’s will. Harry must discover that his friends are a greater help then he can imagine and how to use the “Power the Dark Lord knows not.” With a little romance, action, mystery and even Quidditch along the way, Harry will find out if he and his friends can defeat the greatest Dark Wizard of the age.
This story was completely written before the release of DH or the Order of the Phoenix movie. Any similarities are entirely coincidental.
All reviews will recieve a response!
I really liked that you had Hermione unable to do something Defense-related. There has been so much emphasis in canon on how it's her weakest subject, I really think that will come back into play somehow. I also really loved Lavender being catty to Hermione. Such a small detail, but very well spotted.
I have to admit, I really miss Harry playing Quidditch. I don't think I like seeing it go on without him. :(
Author's Response: Thanks, I think it is the little details that make these stories fun. We all have the same basic concept if we are writing a 7th book story. So it is the little things that make it our own. That was one of the things l loved about your stories. As for Harry and Quidditch, there is a game left in the season but GInny would have to be hurt or something for Harry to play. No one knows what the future holds, except Trelawny, and Ferinze and who knows what they would tell you. :) Take Care
Oh, thanks. I'm so glad you're doing an aftermath. I really missed that in DH. Sniff over the loss of Hagrid. I think that would hit very hard. Percy was a shock, but a really good one. I was so certain that when everyone argued with Ron, he'd be proved wrong. That seems to usually be the way it worked. I was delighted to see something different.
Author's Response: Thanks Melinda, I enjoyed making my argument for Percy being a bad guy. That was the only thing about DH I didn\'t like, the fact that Percy came back and was accepted too easily. Yes we will have a bit of after math and an epilogue at the end. Take Care and I hope you are working on something orginal for us to go out and buy.
Glad to see our favorite duo awake. I felt bad for Harry thinking only he was expendable. It's so like him, though. And now we're winding towards the end...
Author's Response: Yes, moving that way quickly. Thanks for the review, and good luck on getting nominated for a Quick Silver award. The Seventh Horcrux is the best Fanfic on this site so I hope it wins. Take Care
Go, Harry. Great chapter - I loved his chat with DD's spirit and the way he chose was just so Harry. I enjoyed it, and I like the way he shrunk into the wall as he began worrying about what he'd done, as well. I also liked the way Ron checked with him that he was all right before taking Ginny to the hospital wing.
Author's Response: That scene in the hall way came together really well. I think Harry would have been going into over-drive with guilt for just thinking about killing Malfoy, and trying to find a place to escape would be the first thing on his mind. I also wanted to show how his friends understand him better now. Hermione is relunctant to leave him, and Ron checks on him. Arent\' friends grand. THanks for the review.
I'd suspected Ginny and Neville, but you really surprised me with Luna. Harry didn't get anything from Lancaster though, and Kreacher is still betraying them.
Author's Response: GInny I thought was pretty obvious, most everyone knew she was the cat, but I really see the six of them as a sort of unit. Since they were the six that went to the Ministry in OotP. That was the genisus of this story. Kreacher is still evil because people, and house elves rarely change. THanks for the support and I\'m glad I surprised you. Take Care