Penname: LDJames [Contact]
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Member Since: 05/15/06
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Beta-reader: 1
Status: Member
Bio:
L.D. James is a thirteen year old girl living on the Eastern Seaboard. She loves HP (obviously xD), puppies, and volleyball.
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Reviews by LDJames
 

A Potter Wedding by wizard lover
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 40]

Summary: As Harry's oldest son battles his nerves, Harry has a chat with his in-law and reflects on his son's life.
My first story so I would love feedback. Good or bad, I'll take it.

Categories: Post-Hogwarts Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1015 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/07/06 Updated: 08/17/06


Reviewer: LDJames Signed
Date: 09/14/06 Title: Chapter 1: The Wedding Day

Hello,
I actually love this story. Next-Gens are my favorites to read, even though they are the most confusing...all of those names! But I liked yours mostly because it's short and most of the characters we already knew. The new characters you introduced were easy to remember and so you didn't get me all confused. xD However, I didn't like the fact that you chose James as the son's name. As an avid Next-Gen reader, I see James as Harry's son's name all too frequently for my tastes. I think the story would have benefited from a more original name. Also, there was a lack of overall description across the board. James was great, I could truly picture him (but that might not count, considering as how I simply used the image for Marauder-James for Harry's-Son-James). The canon characters don't require all that much description, but a couple words here and there would have been nice. I understand not using description on Draco when Harry talks with him shortly before the ceremony; that's necessary in order to keep the surprise at the end secret. Joshua (the best man), all of the bridesmaids, and even Violet could have used a lot more description. You might think that by describing Violet, you're giving the secret away, but I highly disagree. With the Malfoy blonde hair, she could easily be mistaken for Gabrielle Delacour's daugher until you reveal that she's a Malfoy at the end. Anyway, that's all of the nitpicky stuff I can conjure up. Great story overall, and I can't wait to read more of your work!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review. I\'ve never had one that long before!! I love the next-Gen stories, hence my writing preference. I didn\'t put much description of everyone else because I wanted this to be just about James. This was his day, and I thought that adding everyone else into that would take away from him. I\'m writing another story now with the same characters, you\'ll probably hate the names I\'ve picked. But, I assure you, everyone else is described down the the last freckle. You WILL get confused though. I plan on an entire page only with the family tree on it. Thanks again.

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