Welcome to my author page!
I am a teacher, musician, reader, and avid Harry Potter fan. I am originally from the Midwest and now live a bit farther south. I am thrilled to be a proud member of RAVENCLAW House and enjoyed being a site moderator for a time as well.
I hope you enjoy the many stories and poems I have written. I am proud of them all and appreciate any feedback you might care to leave (in other words, reviews are love!) I've listed them below with a short description since I know trolling through summaries can be tedious. Thanks for reading!
EDIT: Someday I will categorize my stories by genre. Today is not that day. ;)
Summary: Seamus Finnigan only asked Lavender Brown to the Yule Ball because he was pretty sure Angelina Johnson would say no. They'd have a drink, a dance, and a laugh - that's all. Dean might be after a snog from a girl, but Seamus wasn't bothered.
But then Lavender appeared in the common room, in a swirl of a dress, and he was lost.
This is Equinox Chick of Hufflepuff and this is my entry in the February Love Challenge - category First Love - over at the Great Hall on MNFF beta boards.
Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling. Is anyone shocked by that announcement?
I need to thank Natalie (hestiajones) for beta'ing this fic and being generally amazing and VERY supportive whilst I wrote this.
Thanks also to Emma (Amortentia x) for filling me in on Irish boyspeak.
Finally, the title for this story is a tweaked line from Eternity by William Blake.
Aw, what a sweet ending! That was really lovely. I absolutely believe it happened in canon and want to know more about how that last scene came to be with Seamus standing in for Lavender's father. Great job with both characters, it was so refreshing to read about them before the events of the later books. As a Ravenclaw, I should perhaps be offended by the bookish non-participation of my house at the dance, but that would have totally been me sitting there on the side talking it up so I'm not, LOL! Good luck in the challenge! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Thanks Gina. OOOH, the last scene. Well, I left that deliberately vague but I do have three other Lavender fics on the site and whilst this isn't really a prequel to any of them, I do pair her with three different men. I know who my favourite is, though. I'm a bit mean to Ravenclaws, aren't I? Sorry. Thanks again ~Carole~
Summary: Rolanda Hooch thought her first year teaching (when she had to control Bellatrix Black) would always be her worst year. But then she'd hadn't met a messy-haired Gryffindor, his equally cocksure friend, and a red-haired witch with a penchant for revenge.
Sometimes she wished she'd never taken the job at Hogwarts.
This is Equinox Chick of Hufflepuff and this is my entry for the I Challenge Thee Challenge held in Fiction Junction over at the MNFF beta boards.
I accepted a challenge by Karaley Dargen which was
Write about James I. first flying lesson. It does not go well.
Thank you to Lexi (Harry Rulz) for beta'ing this fic for me.
Disclaimer: I'm not JK Rowling. If that honestly surprises you then perhaps you should check into the Priory.
Oh, another great last line! That's precious, LOL! What a cute story. I really enjoyed reading about Rolanda. Her interaction with McGonagall was great and it was loads of fun to see into her thoughts regarding James, Sirius, and the others. Wow, James and Sirius were firecrackers from the beginning! I liked how you connected James's character to his father. Most of all, I liked Lily, especially at the end. Great story! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Thank you, Gina. I'm glad you liked Lily. I wanted her to be spirited and naughty, rather than a Hermione-like rule abiding girl. Originally this was a story from James Potter's POV, but it really didn't work, so i switched to Rolanda. I like to think Hooch was extremely relieved when Harry turned out to be much calmer than his parents - hee hee. Thanks again ~Carole~
Summary: Summary: There are many forms of love and many ways in which love can ambush the unwary. First sight can surprise us.
This is Northumbrian of Ravenclaw House writing for the February Month of Love prompt, Surprise Love.
That was beautiful! You've captured Harry's feelings at the birth of his first son wonderfully. You used his voice well, also - it was all very 'Harry.' I liked Ginny's characterization too, and their interaction was great, even the swearing. ;)
I think my favorite lines had to be:
I fell in love with a schoolgirl. I married an International Quidditch player. Tonight, for the first time in my life I will share my bed with a mother.
That's just briliiant, beautiful, perfect!
The end was very cute, very touching. Really, this was all just lovely. And in my very humble opinion, I still think it fits the prompt of surprise love, because just about everything about having and falling in love with a new baby is a surprise.
Great job!! ~Gina :)
The swearing was (in my opinion) essential.
The lines you quote were my favourites, too. Thank you.
Summary: A poem of the night Voldemort was defeated, written in the style of "Jabberwocky" by Lewis Carroll.
Great job! You showed a strong understanding of the original in crafting this one. Good rhythm, and it flowed nicely as a story. I've done this myself with a bit of Luna and her mythical creatures, so the second to last stanza felt a bit off. I looked up the original and think the second and third lines in that stanza should be reversed to truly parallel it; of course, I don't know if you chose to do that, but wanted to point that out if you didn't. Otherwise, it's a good poem, nice job! I love reading these sorts of things and enjoyed yours very much. ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. I'm glad you liked it. As for the second to last stanza, that was the most difficult for me. I made it fit with the scene and the poem as best I could, taking a bit of a cue from Peeves (one of my favorite side characters). It's not a perfect fit, I agree... but works well enough for what I was going for. Thanks again. ~JBS
Summary: Hermione waits behind a window. She is waiting for the world to come alive again.
Nominated in the 2010 Quicksilver Quill Awards for Best Canon Romance.
That was lovely! I like reading stories about those few days after the battle, and this feels like it could have happened. You did a great job writing from Hermione's point of view, of detailing her emotions about everything that has happened. And you paced it very well, building the tension. The last line was a perfect release without going into the messy details. ;) Nice work! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Hi Gina! Hermione is one of my favourite characters to write so I'm glad you thought I did a good job of her. The ending is one of my favourite bits as well. I like leaving it at that point. I don't think it's necessary to go further since that really isn't what the fic is about hehe. Thanks for the lovely review!
Summary: He had been meandering though the distance for ages, unsure of what she would say in the final moment.
Song lyrics taken from U2’s The Sweetest Thing. And I am not J.K.Rowling.
hat was very sweet! I'm not familiar enough with the song or with songfics in general to comment on that, but I thought that each little bit developed nicely to the end. Of course the resolution was my favorite part - James's speech was perfect, but I'm a sucker for those kinds of speeches. Because *of course* something like that had to be said for them to finally get together! :) I also liked the contrast between him going to her at the beginning and her coming to him at the end, it was a nice, subtle touch. Lily's characterization - that little hint about breaking the rules - was cute and different for her. And the simple ending was perfect for the beginning of their relationship. Nice job, I enjoyed reading your J/L moment! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Ahhh...it's a lovely song! You must listen to it. The mood and music suit these two so well.
I'm so happy you liked Prongs' speech - I just wrote that without thinking whether it would suit him or not. And yes! I knew the ending had to be simplistic. :)
Thanks for the review again!
Summary: A typical day in the lives of Mr and Mrs H J Potter suddenly becomes far from typical when Harry makes a chance discovery.
I love it! I have a huge smile on my face, which is always a great way to end a story. You have a real knack for writing in this point of view and tense. It flows very well and is easy to read, plus you've captured both characters' voices perfectly.
I really want to ask if this story and your other one come from personal experience, but that's too personal; however, it reads like something very real, very close, and that's a strong point for the story and you.
Even though this story was about Harry and Ginny finding out they were having a baby, my favorite part was with the Aurors. Brilliant! I loved the cards they carried and how you set up the hierachy in the office. You've done great research and really fleshed out an area we don't know much about it. It should be canon, as far as I'm concerned. It was also neat to see so many familiar characters in that part. You give them all background quickly without feeling rushed or contrived.
I would only say the last paragraph felt a bit abrupt, but by then I was already smiling at what Harry had done for Ginny and her reaction. This was really well-written, well-researched and thought out, and just so sweet. I enjoyed it tremendously. Great job! ~Gina :)
Gina, thank you.
It Takes Two, simply appeared as an idea, rather like “Arthur” did.
I’ve been giving the Auror Office a lot of thought as the sequel to “Grave Days” will feature some Auror action. Consequently I came up with a rough timeline for Harry and his friends future careers. I’ve read very few Auror stories and the ones I have read seen too assume a military/paramilitary organisation. I also reckon that there aren’t very many of them.
The Auror section was supposed to be a short set-up piece to get Harry to the hospital but it just grew and grew.
The ending was the bit I was least happy with. It seemed sensible to stop just before the back slapping and congratulations. I tried to lengthen the run up to the restaurant scene, but it just seemed padded, so I left it alone. Neil
Summary: It's Dudley Dursley's fifth birthday party, and Aunt Marge has just whacked Harry around the shins for doing too well at musical statues. Sad and lonely, Harry takes comfort in the small daisies that are littered at his feet. However, for one adult watching, the child's actions cause less than comforting memories to resurface.
That was a really nice connection you made to the scene with Lily and Petunia in DH! Poor Harry, your story really makes the reader feel bad for his terrible childhood. Nice job! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Thanks very much for reviewing :) I'm glad you liked it. Sarah x
Nominated for a 2010 QSQ Award!
Love it! I love poems that have repeating lines, it just lends the piece a sense of flow and cohesiveness that I for one appreciate. Your refrain - 'as the boy crouched low and cried' - was both lovely and sad, a perfect finishing line for each stanza. Your language and imagery is strong, and concluding with the first stanza brought it full circle very nicely. Wonderful job! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Hi Gina! Thanks so much for the lovely review. I love repetition as well and it features strongly in most of my fics and poems. I'm glad you enjoyed the poem and it's always nice to see another review from you :) Julia XD
Summary: James Potter had asked her before for a date, several times, although not always for himself. Now, as Lily Evans gazes at her reflection in the mirror, she wonders why he keeps asking her and just why she's finally said yes.
I am Equinox Chick of Hufflepuff and this story has been written for the first round of the Character Clinic Triathlon over at the MNFF beta boards. Prompt: First Kiss.
Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling. Her lawyers agree, so don't get them riled by confusing us.
Thank you very much to Natalie (hestiajones) for beta'ing this fic for me. I need to also add that Natalie may be a Hufflepuff, but she does not have fluffy hair and in no way resembles the Hestia Jones that appears in this story. Finally, you may recognise some OC's from my fic Lions of Gryffindor. This isn't exactly 'caron' compliant with that story, but it kinda fits ... in parts ... sort of.
I love the last line, it's perfect! What a sweet story, very well done. I love stories about James and Lily getting together and yours was very fun to read. Good luck in the triathlon! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Thank you, Gina. I like a bit of fluff occasionally. ~Carole~
One-shot, set shortly after the final battle.
George is slowly accepting the loss of his twin.
For the Madam Pomfrey One-Shot Triathlon - Round One: Major Canon Characters, Prompt #5 by Hokey of Slytherin
Very nice! I really liked how you intertwined some of George's memories with his present. It fleshed out their life together and gave the story a nice depth. Very sweet ending with Angelina. Good luck in the challenge! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Thanks, Gina! At first I had the story standing alone, without the memories. Then I added one, then another, and it almost got out of hand :P It turned out quite a different story than I started with, but I too like it as it is now! I'm glad you enjoyed it :)
Ginny Weasley Potter is newly married, but matrimony was proving to be more difficult than she had ever expected. Harry was nearly always working, and her dreams of wedded bliss were slowly slipping though her fingers.
And then came Gabrielle Delacour, an incidental acquaintance and an unlikely ally. Gabrielle tries to help Ginny mend her soul and her marriage, but slowly, Ginny realises that there is more to this newfound friendship than she had ever thought possible.
Well, damn! You worked the snot out of that rarepair, wow! I had read your Ginny/Gabby drabble, so I had some idea of what to expect. This was different – their affair starting right after Ginny gets married instead of years later. I liked that. It almost makes it more believable, because I don’t know if Harry would overwork and drift away if there were kids in the picture. Setting it right after the wedding lent it urgency.
In a way, it’s hard to believe Harry would treat Ginny that way, but you mentioned him training to be Head Auror and since we know that happens, that lends it credibility. Plus you totally worked the “clueless” aspect of his character, making it even more real. Even though he brought this upon himself, for most of the story I still felt bad for him.
I felt even more bad for Ginny, especially by the end. What an ending. You really tortured her with those last few paragraphs. So what happens? Does she keep seeing Gabrielle? You know you’ve written a good story when readers want to know more.
Gabrielle was a great confidant for Ginny. In your mind, did Gabrielle have feelings for Ginny from the beginning? The small details – the light touches and such – make me think she did. I loved the showdown with Harry. I was a bit confused when Gabrielle took Ginny to her house since I assumed she left before Harry and Ginny had it out, but that’s just me.
The dream sequence was absolutely terrifying! Poor Ginny. That showed real insight into her fears, without just telling us – here, this is what Ginny is scared of. Very nice writing there. You did great with her character, developing her feelings slowly but surely (which is important, since this was for a character challenge! a86; )
I must say, when I first started it – all 8300 words of it (how DO you do that?!) – I was thinking “Wow, this is rather fluffy for Jess!” But by the end the angst was in full swing and that’s what I wanted and expected from this story. You developed it nicely, choosing your scenes well fleshing everything out, so by the end the reader believes it and feels it.
Really lovely job. I think it’s awesome that you wrote a first kiss story for the challenge that doesn’t turn out so well for the couple! Good luck in the challenge!
Aww, thank you so much. I'm mucho happy at the moment. :)
I really wanted this to have the feel of something that could really happen. As you know, I hate making Harry seem like the bad guy, but I just have this image of him being a pretty inattentive husband. Not on purpose, but sheerly because of his dedication to his work.
"It almost makes it more believable, because I don’t know if Harry would overwork and drift away if there were kids in the picture."
Incidentally enough, in the timeline I picked, it was actually possible for James to have been conceived during that time off that Harry had taken. I needed to re-establish their relationship, even if Ginny didn't really want to, because I am, as you know, a canon slave.
I really did want you to feel bad for Harry, because while it is his fault that this happened, it's not really his fault, if that makes any sense. He is, as you mentioned, clueless about women, even the one he's married to, so he's already starting off with a couple strikes against him.
For once, I really wanted everything to work out for Ginny, but that would have meant that she was still with Gabby, which just couldn't really happen. I'm still spinning bits of it in my head about where I want this to go in the future. I might even write about Gabby in the minor character prompts. I'm sure I could insert a plot bunny into it.
Gabby. I really wanted Gabby to be happy. She used to be this two-dimensional, sister-of-Fleur, derivation of background noise, but now she's so real to me, I hate thinking of her having her heart broken at 18. I really think she's more, um, experienced in worldly things, but there's a vast difference between that and love. And yes, she had feelings for Ginny long before Ginny reciprocated.
In the dream sequence, I really wanted Ginny to feel fear. At this point, she stilll loved Harry a great deal, so for him to say such acid and hurtful things to her was wounding and terrible. Of course, even though real Harry would never in a thousand lifetimes said anything of the sort, I wanted that instinct to flee embedded into Ginny's brain, because well... I needed it, lol
8300 words, to me, is like... normal. I'm actually pleased with the length, because for a while, I wasn't sure that I could fit it into a one-shot. I had planned more time together for Ginny and Gabby, but I knew that it would put me way over the mark. Instead, I focused on the decay of her marriage and how that affected her. And moi, write fluff? Only for Amanda, because she hearts fluff so much.
This has to be angst, because I wanted Ginny to, in the end, do the right thing (well, I guess it's the right thing), but agonize about it. As this was a characterization, I really needed her nature, the one that is all about loyalty, to come out. I think she would stick with Harry through just about anything (by 'just about', I do draw a line), but that doesn't mean that it's a smooth ride.
As for the first kiss aspect, how often does that really work out? Not too many first kiss/first love stories ever amount to anything, and this one is no different, though had she not been married, I think Ginny would have pursued it. Had this happened before her wedding, I really think that she would have broken things off, because it wouldn't have been fair to Harry at all.
Regarding the sequence of Harry and Ginny arguing after Harry and Gabby had it out, in my mind, it happened like this (and since it's from Ginny's perspective, I couldn't add Gabby's thoughts in there): Harry storms out of the kitchen to confront Ginny, but Gabby, horrified that it had spiraled this far out of control, just sort of stood in the kitchen and collected herself. When she heard Ginny shouting, she went back into the living room to see Harry leaving and Ginny miserable. She sort of stared for a while, not sure about what she should do. Finally, when she saw how distressed Ginny was, she started steering her toward the bedroom, Ginny freaked out and didn't want to sleep there, and then the rest, you know. It's hard to write for purely one person's perspective, as some aspects of the story remain a mystery, but as it is characterization, Ginny's thoughts and feelingswere paramount.
Anyway, enough of my rambling. Thank you for the lovely review, and my review for "Lost" will be coming VERY soon. Cheers and happiness, my friend!
Sunshine spilled down onto the small grassy spot through a window in the tall trees. She stood a couple of yards back, staring at eleven letters cut into rock. It was beautiful, and yet, to Hermione’s eyes, nowhere near a worthy enough tribute for a life so full of rambunctious joy.
Lovely! That was just so sweet, so heartfelt. Excellent writing! It really flowed well, and there was a great balance between description and dialogue. You captured your characters' grief perfectly with both their thoughts and their actions, and knew exactly when to throw in a lighter moment. This feels like canon, and I really, really enjoyed reading it. Good luck in the challenge! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Thanks so much, Gina. I tend to struggle a bit in the description area, so I'm glad you think it balanced out all right. "Feels like canon" ...that really makes my day! Thanks again for taking the time to respond. I'm glad you liked it.
Summary: Life with the Potters is always interesting. What emergency could haul Deputy Head Auror Harry Potter from his bed in the middle of the night?
That was wonderful, just like the other two! I just love reading these stories about Harry and Ginny and their kids. Everything about them rings so true to life and so beautiful! I don't know what constructive criticism I could offer even if I wanted to. You build each moment of these stories with such detail and heartfelt emotion. You portray Harry as a father wonderfully well - I love that these are in his point of view. I would really like to read something about Lily, if you had any plans to continue. It would be lovely to see Harry's reaction to having a daughter. Thank you so much for sharing these, they are wonderful! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Gina Thank you so much. Others have suggested that I write a Lily story, too. Perhaps I will, but I’ll need inspiration to strike first. I suspect that, though he’ll try very hard to be fair to his kids, Lily will be Harry’s favourite and he’ll finally discover why Ron is so protective of his little princess. I’m beginning to see the glimmerings of a story… -N-
Summary: A night to forget everything else; a night to remember.
Dedicated to Harry/Ginny.
Hey! Nice job! I love your language, and the places where you use some repetition work very nicely. At first I had no idea who this was about, because I am pretty dense when it comes to free verse especially, but then I went back and saw "Dedicated to Harry and Ginny" and suddenly it made PERFECT SENSE. You captured a lot about their relationship in this poem, from their anticipation and waiting to their celebration and consumation. For some reason I especially liked "A night for healing bruises, for numbing pain;" because I can only imagine how damaged Harry in particular was by all he went through. I also really liked the reference to the colors. Lovely poem! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Gina!
Thank you so much for the review. I am so happy you found that this story summed Harry and Ginny's relationship well. I tried to convey all their waiting, their pain and happiness without trying to be obvious. The colours were the major clues that I left. Glad you picked them up. :D:D:D
Summary: By time Harry meets him in book 1, Snape is a bitter, cold man. But what if his life had taken a different turn earlier? What if, before he had a chance to lose his best friend, he found out other people - girls even - could like him?
A bit of Snape!Fluff, although not as fluffy as some. There is some allusion to past sexual activit/innuendo, but nothing happens other than a kiss.
Wait - what do your end notes mean?? There's another story there, I know it! The Slytherins get her, don't they?? Nooo! You should write it - I like Anna. She's a spunky little 'Puff to fall for a guy like Snape. You set it up nicely, too. What I liked best was that her friends were so loyal to her they didn't mind her dating Snape - and even better, Snape liked that too. Very nice little tale, here! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Actually, Gina, at the moment I'm not sure where it goes from there and I have several possible ideas. A happy Snape might be something of a boring Snape, but then again, maybe just very very different? Not sure anyone can really accept that. But I may just let you all speculate... I like Anna, too. She's the kind of spunky gal a clueless guy needs! And she is already sort of forcing him to see that different is not necessarily less - she is no dab hand a potions, but she is artistic and good at a number of other things... Thank you again for this review!!!
When he realises the deadly plan set before him by Dumbledore, Harry's heart goes through an incredible journey to find calm in the eye of the storm.
This sonnet won The Diamond Challenge on the Poetry Anyone forum. The prompt that inspired it was 'Loyalty'.
This poem was nominated for a 2010 Quicksilver Quill Award - Best Poem
*nabs first review*
I still love it. It looks great on the archive, it really does. Like I said before, the rhythm is fantastic. It's perfectly easy to read and bounces off the tongue exactly as it should. And (again) the rhymes are great as well— it never sounds like you grabbed a word just because it rhymed, but that you intended to use each of those anyway and they all just flow together naturally with great rhythm on top of it. I like some of the changes you made to the punctuation. It doesn't seem like each part is a run-on sentence. The couplet at the end is brilliant. Really, I'm jealous. I would love to say I wrote a sonnet this good. Kudos, dear! You no longer have anything to fear from poetry! ~Gina :)
Yay! I heart your reviews. They always make me feel so accomplished. :D
I worked like a dog to make sure that this flowed well with iambic pentameter and still said what I wanted it to say. I agonized over every single word and syllable. But structured poetry like this is what I like, because me + freedom from strictures in writing = effing fiasco.
I'm really glad you like it and I'm quite pleased with how it came out. It won't win a QSQ or anything, but it's something that I'm proud to have been able to accomplish. My goal is to have at least one piece in every genre. I have conquered the largest obstacle on the road. Snarry scares me less than poetry. :-\
Anyhow, thanks for reviewing, and I hope this poem is appreciated by the readers solely by the virtue of how hard it was to write and make it as close to perfect as possible. :-)
Summary: Late Christmas Eve, a girl plays the piano in St. Mungo's. Harry Potter, making his usual rounds, stumbles upon her. He hasn't seen her for months and wants to know why she is here.
That was a really fascinating take on Luna's marriage! You could spin a much bigger story from this, because I am already wondering how Luna and Rolf met, and why she disappeared, and more importantly, what happens next: does Harry go after Rolf? Do they reconcile with Luna? Why was Harry so angry?
I also loved seeing some music in the Potterverse! The way Luna played the piano fit perfectly with her character. Nice job!
Summary: Harry finally arrives at Godric Hollow, but memories are all he finds.
This was written for the Magic in Music Challenge in Poetry Anyone, and it came SECOND. My chosen piece was Harry and Hermione by Nicholas Hooper (Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince soundtrack).
I like it! It's very touching and fits the subject very well (and it's been a while since I listened to the soundtrack, but I imagine the music goes nicely with it.)
I love the way you repeated certain phrases/ideas, that always gives a poem more depth for me - maybe because the repetition knocks me over the head so if I don't get it the first time, hopefully I'll get it by the third. ;) I'm tempted to suggest a bit more (ie, All I can see/All I can hear), but I worry it would make the poem too redundant, too repetitive, and the single lines and non-repeating phrases break it up nicely. So maybe a tweak here or there in the punctuation to lend the form a more cohesive feeling?
I love the line "There is nothing I wouldn't do" after the rest of that stanza: very powerful. However, I might take out "mere" at the very end so that the "memories" in the last line mirrors the "memories" from the first line.
Very nice poem, Natalie! Is it a challenge? If so, good luck! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Hello!
I suck at poetry-punctuation. :-( Perhaps, that's why the poem doesn't read nicely? I shall look into it. MMmm...I added "mere" in the last line so as to give more significance to Harry's resentment. The memories he has, for instance, are not enough. Where are the good times and carefree moments? I imagine he would feel a great longing for his parents' presence. So, I had to sacrifice the parallel there.
Thanks for the review, Gina! I am happy you enjoyed my poem. I am always anxious about my poetry, and it's a pleasant surprise when someone tells me they liked it. :)
Lucia Zabini thought that her sixth husband would be her last, but events unfolded that sent her to the altar once more. She was weary of the old vicious matrimonial cycle, and she had fully intended for this to be the last.
Will her new husband find the out the truth of her past, and would he believe that she truly means him no harm?
This is ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor of Ravenclaw, and this is my submission for the Madame Pomfrey's Character Clinic Triathlon's Minor Character Challenge. The Prompt selected was the wedding day prompt. This story was selected as the Overall Winner.
This story was nominated for a 2010 Quicksilver Quill Award - Best Dark/Angsty Story.
Yikes. That’s dark. I saw in some of the reviews you responded to that you wanted readers to like her a bit. Well, I didn’t - sorry! She was a cold-hearted *itch, through and through! When Marcus cornered her with some bite, I was cheering for *him*. When she used the Cruciatus Curse, I was a bit shocked. And when she killed him I was just thinking “!%$#^%.” I had been hoping she might just Obliviate him. It might have given me the smallest shiver of respect for her, if she let him live without the memory of the diary. I couldn’t believe she just went back to her book! So if you wanted me to feel a bit of sympathy for her, I didn’t; if you wanted me to really dislike her, I did. Frankly, I want a sequel where she gets her due. I want husband No. 8 to blackmail her and maybe even torture her a bit. That’s how riled up she got me. ;) Your writing is good at doing that – evoking a powerful reaction. I still think about that Albus/Scorpius piece you did.
I didn’t find the diary a plot device at all, I thought it was a great idea. There is probably a term for it, the way it functions in the plot and how it propels the story to it's tragic conclusion, but I can’t think of it (and it’s probably really simple, too.) It worked perfectly and made total sense to me. I did feel, though, that the actual entry didn’t always read like a diary entry, but more like a story. I think perhaps writing it more as a present tense confessional rather than a retelling of the past might make more of an emotional connection.
For a character challenge, you’ve drawn a heck of a character here. I love that you can always come up with an unexpected twist in the Potterverse. Good luck with the competition! ~Gina :)
Haha, welcome once again to my author page. :D
I'm not sure if 'like' is the appropriate term (totally my bad, lol). I think I wanted to show that she really wasn't completely diabolical, but she is just enough to be the cold-hearted succubus that she is. Everyone just seems Voldemort as the catch-all 'worst guy in the world', but no one remembers those who do so in the shadows.
The honest truth about the diary entry is this; this piece started off as a drabble that was supposed to be only the diary entry, but it was too long. I was too lazy to cut it, so I kept going and made it fit the CC prompt. I tried to make the entry sound like she does when she talks and thinks, but that's not always easy to do. I guess I didn't want it to be too emotional, since she is rather cold and viperous, but some moments, like when she talks about Blaise, that feeling seeps into her writing, her mindset, and her words.
In my mind, she wasn't going to kill Marcus until he made the remark about Blaise. That sent her over the edge, since he's the only person in the world about whom she truly cares.
Yeah, that was an overlong explanation for a simple question, lol. I do that...the rambling. Well, anyhow, tip o' the hat for reviewing and have a nice night. :)