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Phoebe Gruzelier [Contact]

Hell-o person who has (probably) accidentally stumbled on this page while trying to hack into JKR’s computer. For any people interested, I am the writer of Roses and Thorns. And I love Strictly Come Dancing. Didn’t know that? Have I got news for you…

I live in Birmingham, England in a crazy three-storey house near Cannon Hill Park. My mum comes from New Zealand and is good at making chocolate milkshakes. Oh, and did I mention she teaches Latin and Greek at my school?!?! Dad teaches Computer Science at Uni, and thinks all modern musicians shout be shot, on-site. I also have a sister who helps edit bits of my story and help with knotty bits of plots.

As well as my nutty but cool family, we have cats. Jasper (or Paspy) is a cute, squishy, silver tabby with only one brain cell. I bet it can get rather lonely in that head of his. But we love him anyway! Our other one is called the Ginger Marauder. He didn’t like the baby in his house, so moved out and ‘adopted’ us. Mean, moody, evil and will savage Paspy at every opportunity, we do not like him, and remind him of this frequently. The only reason we let him stay is that he’s learnt how to pick the cat-flap so we can’t lock him out.

That’s my mad home-life. What about school?

My group (the Society for Odds and Sods, or SOS) gives all our cliques names. We consist of Emily (me), Jo (the Loner) and Lucy (the Pleasant One). Our job is to be strange and worry people. I’m the Fountain of Knowledge for all Classic Books (well, not really) Jo knows everything about Wolves and Lucy is permanently residing in another world.

But anyway, I love English and Art the best, and I can’t STAND Maths and PE. I like acting in the School Play, hanging around the Library and trying to convert people to Jane Eyre.

That’s enough about school. When I get home, one of my favourite things to do is read. My favourite books depend on what I have just been reading, but at the moment it’s Jane Eyre, Shirley, Ivy and North Child. I really recommend these books and I encourage you to get them out of the library!

I write a lot, too. I have a Hamtaro notebook which used to be a diary which I’ve written all of Roses and Thorns in. And I draw little pictures to help me with describing people/places. They aren’t worth anyone else seeing, because they’re just doodles. I write very slowly, because I have to remember while I’m doing it to put enough description in, keep sentences short and not repeat words too much.

I also like watching TV. As you already know, I devoutly follow Strictly Come Dancing. Most of the other programmes I like are Period Drama (I can’t stand Game Shows, Soaps or Reality TV, apart from SCD, of course,) My favourites are Jane Eyre (Ruth Wilson and Toby Stevens) Northanger Abbey (Felicity Jones and JJ Field) Pride and Prejudice (Jennifer Ehle and Colin Firth) and North and South (Daniela Derby-Ashe and Richard Armitige).

The things I hate most in the world are Maths homework (may it burn in hell), Billie Piper (why is she an actress, seeing as she can’t act), Kiera Knightly (ditto) and High School Musical (nnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooo)…

When it comes to Harry Potter, my favourite characters are Hermione, Luna, Cho and (recently) Barty Crouch Jr. (If you don’t understand why, read R+T.) I don’t like James (he’s too horizontal) Sirius (the idiot) and Draco (the wimp). I also have a vendetta against Ginny Weasley. Everyone has one, and I don’t like her 2-D, packaged ‘strong and independent’ character which is so boring and predictable.

As regards Ships, I’ll read most of them (even if I don’t support them) except for the four smellies: Draco/Hermy (how dare anyone suggest it) Snape/Hermy (he’s way too old for her) Ginny/Hermy (they’re friends…just friends) and Harry/Ginny (NO. WAY.)

But I’m a sucker for Ron/Hermy (isn’t it obvious?) Harry/Cho (they rocked, and I don’t care if everyone else hated them) Snape/Lily (James gave her a love potion. No one in their right minds would prefer him to Snape) and most of the ones in R+T.

My favourite books are OoP and PoA, and my least fave are HBP and DH (just too depressing). The films annoy me in the way that they miss so much out and Hermy wears a pink Yule Ball dress. But sometimes they do characters better than how I imagined: Barty Crouch Jr, Bella, Lockhart and Filch, for example.

I’m a Ravenclaw through and through, but Gryffindor, Hufflepuff and Slytherin are OK, and I don’t hate them. Go inter-house unity!

My equivalent in the HP world…

Which HP Kid Are You?

(Apparantly) I am (out of the lesser HP characters)…

[i'm firenze!]

...and which lesser Harry Potter character are you?

I support…

[ron + hermione]

[harry + cho]

[lily + snape]

DAVID TENNANT!!!!!!! rocks my world! He is the only person who could make me watch Doctor Who, Recovery, Learners, or any other stupid dramas he’s in.

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Stories by Phoebe Gruzelier [1]
Favorite Authors [4]
Favorite Stories [4]
Phoebe Gruzelier's Favorites [8]
Reviews by Phoebe Gruzelier

Passion, Pain, and Pumpkin Pasties by beauty and brains

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Ever wonder how Ron and Hermione really got together? How constant fighting seemed to lead to a romance? What happens when a letter to a certain Durmstrang student sends a certain Gryffindor over the edge? Join Ron and Hermione on the night they came together, and the pumpkin pasties that seem to get in the way. All told from Colin Creevey’s point of view, of course!
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 07/18/07 Title: Chapter 1: Passion, Pain, and Pumpkin Pasties

I read a lot of Ron/Hermione stories, becuase they're my favourite pairing! A lot of them are a bit on the similar side-Ron, who has suddenly become tall, noble and handsome, and Hermione, who has turned (somehow) into a simpering, 'I am sooo amazingly hot' idiot.

This story was really fresh and original. It was very sad, and all the characters were well-developed and had real emotions, but it was still incredibly funny, which is a big part of Ron/Hermione. BRILLIANT!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I\'m glad I was able to give you a breath of fresh air, which was what I was working for. I, too, quickly tired of all the many cliche Ron/Hermione fics out there. =]

Weasels and Otters by beauty and brains

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: As Ron tries out his hand at Patronuses during the last D.A. meeting, a memory comes to mind that still brings a smile to his face.

I am beauty and brains of Gryffindor for the June One-Shot Challenge.

Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 07/18/07 Title: Chapter 1: Weasels and Otters

It left me with this warm, elated glow! I couldn't care less what Ron's patronus is in the books, I don't remember anything about it!
This is a very special Ron/Hermione story, and I'm looking forward to other stories from you!

Author's Response: Aww, thank you so much! You know, I think you and Pax are my favourite reviewers! =] I hope you enjoy anything else you read of mine!

Amazing Grace by Valentinia

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: To conjure a patronus, one must think of a happy memory. Her life is filled with happy memories, and sad. Yet she knows if she dwells on the unhappiness she will forget to live, and if she recalls the happiest moments, she will be able to fly, graceful free as a swan.

Originally written as an entry for the June One-Shot Challenge - The Best Patronus Ever.
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 06/26/07 Title: Chapter 1: Swan: A Lifetime of Memories

It was brilliant! I could understand exactly what she was thinking (and I think it's good you've given Cho a bit more depth that making her into a mean, minipulative, attention-seeking Popular Girl as people love to do). I also loved all the things you linked it to, like Swan Lake, the BEST BALLET EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Sorry, I am mildly obsessed by it and have no one to talk to it about because all my friends hate ballet).
I loved all the different meomories all jumbled together and pressed into a small space. Absolutely fabulous!

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review and the praise! :D I\'m glad it made sense and I\'m glad someone else out there knows that Cho is human, too. And someone else appreciates ballet... :D

So Good by Valentinia

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Potter and Malfoy have always been enemies. This time it starts out as just another fight. Just another attack. But something is different this time, and Malfoy doesn't know what, but somehow, even though it's wrong, it feels so good.

A pretty dark take on this pairing, sort of a "What if?" moment from anywhere after HBP.
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 04/06/08 Title: Chapter 1: So Good


I'd never really considered this pairing before. You managed to keep them completely IC, and at the same time push them to their limits.

The argument was very good, in my opinion. It sounded EXACTLY like Harry and Malfoy speaking. I particularly liked the line 'because you and Pansy have such a meaningful relationship'. It was so cutting, and it was a very Harry thing to say - he can't quite grasp the way Malfoy USES Pansy, and then can chuck her aside easily.

My only criticism is that maybe Harry and Malfoy's snog was a little TOO sudden and out of the blue? Maybe just a little bit more foreshadowing earlier on in the conversation? I haven't quite made up my mind. I'll have to read chapter two first!

Author's Response: Yeah... this fic was sort of a fancy of mine, I\'m not sure how well it worked out... I\'m glad you thought they were IC though! Thanks for the review!!

A Trampled Iris by beauty and brains

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Helga’s life takes a turn for the worse after receiving sudden news of her sister’s death. When she thinks her life could not possibly get any worse, a trail of magical cards lead her on a night filled with horror.

I am beauty and brains of Gryffindor for the Mini Gauntlet Challenge.
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 07/18/07 Title: Chapter 1: A Trampled Iris

Very, very, very scary! It was a very powerful piece. You managed to make it historical, without aielianating the modern readers, which is really hard! There are far too many historical fics which are either all posh and toffee-nosed, or just sound like modern-day.
But there were a few times, particularly in the earlier bits, where you used the same word (like 'card') a few too many times in one paragraph. This isn't a big problem, but if you fixed it, your wonderful story would be even better!

Author's Response: Eeek! You are my first reviewer for this story! =]

Thanks for reading this, it is my Gauntlet entry, so I\'m hoping against hope that this one will do as well as the last! I can honestly say I tried very hard to write this entry without sounding too old-timey. I mean, it was over a thousand years ago!

Thanks for the tip as well! I\'ll get to working on it!

Potentially Problematic by beauty and brains

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Verity Johnstone remembers her own Hogwarts days very clearly. Fred and George were two boys she would never be able to forget, due to being trampled by a pack of badgers during one of their many unforgettable pranks. When Verity is asked on a date by Fred, she is flattered, but what happens when she thinks Fred is George, and George is Fred? She really needs to work on being able to tell them apart…

Written for butter_beer_drinker for Challenge a Gryff!
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 08/13/07 Title: Chapter 1: Potentially Problematic

It's amazing! You can do brilliant rom coms AND fantastic sad stories too!
This story was sweet, cute and funny. I love it when people take a character who you know basically nothing about....and turn them into a fully-fledged, ink and paper person!

All the cannon characters were in-character, and I have suddenly become a big fan of Verity!

Oooh, and I went over it with a fine tooth comb (waits for you to groan) and these are all the things I found...

'Two pair of lively brown eyes sparkled behind strawberry lashes and wide pearly grins lit up each face. '----It should be 'two pairs'

'It was common knowledge throughout the student body that she and Cedric Diggory had once harbored feelings for each other during their sixth year, a year before his death.'-----Nice plot twist, which I didn't see coming, but you use 'death' twice. You could say 'a year before he was killed'........

'She used a bit of emphasize on brilliant.'-----I think it should be 'emphysis'.

'With a small wink, he disappeared beneath the trap door, leaving an eighteen year old girl feeling like a giddy eleven year old with a schoolgirl crush. '-----Instead of 'year old' twice, perhaps First Year?

Apart from that, it was absolutely brilliant! You should definitely write a (longer) sequel! They are just begging for some 'Twelth Night' treatment!

Author's Response: *squees loudly* Thanks so much for reading my newest installment! I love the praises you gave, and am delighted my humble fics are worth so much. I\'m off to correct those mishapes, thanks for the tip! =]

The Bedroom at the Burrow by Pondering

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Fred thought that death would be more exciting than an uncluttered bedroom.

First Place in The Next Great Adventure prompt in the Autumn Challenge of 2007!
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 10/07/07 Title: Chapter 1: The Bedroom at the Burrow

It was nice seeing Fred's 'waiting room' for George. The confusion after death was realisticaly done - the hazyness and difficulty remembering much.

The jumble of meomories, plus the bits with George talking to him, really added. This wasn't your typical 'your favourite character has just died so you write a completely pointless story about them going to heaven and being re-untited with parents/lovers/children/relatives/friends etc.' This was a new take and seemed to have a proper purpose to it!

Author's Response: I\'m glad that you liked the way I portrayed the afterlife. I\'ve seen too many post DH fics where dead characters go to King\'s Cross where they wait for everyone they\'ve ever known, seemingly. O.o Thanks for the review. :D

Consequences by helgaandgodric

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: In my version of the DH epilogue, set 19 years later. Harry has pushed his family away to protect them from the consequences of his actions. But what will happen when the consequences are different then he thought they would be?

IWhile DH is not excluded, the last chapter is. This also happens to be a part of the Ellie Vicky and Ellie Cathy series, although it is not vital to read "A Potter and a Malfoy."
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 10/07/07 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

It was an interesting idea for an epilogue, but I really think you need to expand on it. Ginny's whole 'I'm leaving you Harry' was very sudden and un-Ginny-ish. She sounded a bit...gushing and melodramatic. Ginny's a very practical, down-to-eath character, and this seemed a bit simpering for her. And I think you could have introduced the fact she wasn't happy with the marriage a bit more gradually.

Harry pushing his family away to protect them is very IC and just what he would do. The murder of Lucius was also a bit sudden - it just popped up like a jack-in-the-box.

And how come Rita has suddenly started journalism? Because Hermione would never let her off so she could start writing big, fat lies about people!

I think it was very interesting, but there are some huge gaps still left in the story!

Author's Response: Thank you very much for the review. However, I think it is important for you to remember that this is set 19 years after the final battle. Rita hasn\'t suddenly started journalism; it\'s been more than 20 years since Hermione and her original agreement. (Also, she wasn\'t writing lies, so it\'s allowed). Also, while it may anything else may have seemed sudden, remember: it\'s set 19 years later, and the main point of the story is not what happened, but the consequences of it all.

Dealer Agent by Angel of Dreams

Rated: Professors •
Summary: Even as the Dark Lord ascends, a few of his Death Eaters maintain a small, underground ring to import poisons, often with contacts abroad and in the darker sections of the Muggle community. But when their central agent delivers a drug of remarkable potency, the consequences may rock the magical world.

And may drive the agent to finally reveal what is hidden.

Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 09/30/07 Title: Chapter 1: Where Hell's Leaves Grow

It was amazing! It was dark, powerful, scary and fantasticly written. I don't often read stories about the 'dark' characters of the series (i.e. Voldie, Bella, Cissa, Snape etc) because I tend to find them too depressing, but I'm very glad I read this one!

The sense of mystery about who the agent was, at first, really got me into the story. (And it was a fantastic plot twist she ended up being a girl.)

It was interesting showing how Rufus S. died, because it's never really gone into depth in the DH.

The plant idea was original and lodgical. It seemed much more effective than the Imperius Curse, because, like Barty Crouch Jr., they may be able to fight it after a while.

The desciption was fantastic as well - very vivid!

I just have a few minor corrections:

'This is but a side business for me, my work makes me plenty.' ----- I don't really think you need the 'but' it sounds a bit unecessary.

You also alternate 'luhix' with 'Luhix', and I prefer it with a capital 'L'.

But, apart from that, I thought it was a great job!

Author's Response: Well, thanks for all of that! I appreciate the criticism, and I\'ll keep your comments about the Luhix in mind (and if you liked the plot twists early, you\'ll love the ones coming up...)

Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 08/02/08 Title: Chapter 3: Warehouse 49

Ok, ok, this chapter had me on tenterhooks! If it had been a book, I would have called it a page-turner, but it's not so...

Anyway, I particularly liked your action sequences. Normally I loose interest after about 5 minutes of fighting. But yours were exciting, dynamic and read well. They flowed of the page rapidly, without falling into the basic 'He kicked her. She shot and him but missed. He randomly decided to blow everything up.' patten.

The beginning was also really vivid, and well-written. And the end was SO SO SO dramatic. I can't wait to see how it turns out!

I only picked out two mistakes:

‘cellular phone’ ---- most Brits use ‘mobile’ or ‘mobile phone’

‘It ain’t my fault you got your magic and I became… what you call those people?”
“Squibs,”’---- interesting plot development, but I kinda feel that, if Keith/K-Crank were a squib, he’d know what they were called. Being a squib must be a pretty important part of your life, so he’s unlikely to forget the name. Just my thoughts on the matter.

I forgot to mention, the characterization was really consistent. Bella and Snape were just hiIarious, and I like the way you portray the Dealer as an independant, unsentimental gal, while at the same time you're beginning to brink out some of her weaknesses!

Author's Response: Well, thanks for the review... geez, it's been forever since I've gotten a review from this site. I've moved the majority of my stories to fanfiction.net and Fiction Alley (I've had a lot of problems submitting fics to this site, and frankly, having to put tags in all the time just gets on my nerves), so if you ever want an easier read, check out my stuff there (Angel of Dreams on Fiction Alley, angelofdreams13 at fanfiction.net). Thanks for your support, and keep reading!

Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 04/09/08 Title: Chapter 2: Suspicious Detonations

Intriging, exciting and unpredictable! And very, very well-written. I am at a loss to try and figure out what's going to happen! This story is certainly getting 'curiouser and curiouser'.

I particularly like your characterization. Snape, in particular, was very IC (I loved his comment: “Now, Narcissa, you should get home before you pass out on my living room floor. I don’t want to haul your unconscious body back to Lucius – it could provoke awkward questions.”
it was so Snape, with his dry, sarcastic sense of humor. But at the same time, he's trying to look after Narcissa. I think. I'm not sure - there are so many mind-boggiling twists and turns!)

Some small things I picked up on:

' ”So, you believe this luhix trade...' ---- the " is the wrong way round.

' dear Narcissa.” ' ----- it sounds a bit too informal for Voldermort to be saying this. I always think of him being very cold with his Death Eaters, especially Narciassa, whose husband is in big trouble.

And I think that the way the Dealer Agent is pretending to be a boy for a very convincing reason. Sometimes I think people just have girls dressing up as boys to add to the confusion.

See you!


Author's Response: Thanks for the commentary. If anything, I had the Dark Lord act a little more \'familiar\' because he was toying wtih Narcissa - nothing more, nothing less. And you\'ll see in the next chapter, things will get much more ugly...

Only One Lily by Valentinia

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Severus has saved for such a long time to buy her something worthy. But it seems he was never meant to give it to her. Then again, perhaps it's better that way. Maybe, in his story, there's meant to be only one Lily.

Originally for the September Challenge.
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 02/15/08 Title: Chapter 1: Only One Lily

I absolutely loved this story. (This, of course, has nothing to do with the fact that I ship Sev/Lily, or that your writing was impeccable today!)
But, seriously, I thought it was amazing. The descriptions were vivid and powerful. I especially loved Sev’s descriptions of Lily. They were so poetic and tender. And I loved the way you described the adult Sev’s feelings (‘radiant’ ‘irreplaceable’) with the child Sev’s (‘good’ ‘beautiful’). Because that’s how kids describe things, as ‘sad’ or ‘happy’, whereas adults tend to be more complicated. But you weren’t patronising towards mini-Sev, which is good.
Two things:
‘He spit into the grass in anger.’ ---- ‘spit’ should be ‘spat’
I never really got a particularly clear image of Sev’s gift, even right at the very end. If you intended it to be like this, that’s fine. Just something to think about.

But I thought it was absolutely fantastic!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Gah, tenses... I\'ll go fix that! Again, thanks for the concrit, the review and (*head inflates*) the praise! :)

(Lost My) Colors by Valentinia

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Cho Chang has suffered the worst loss imaginable - and because of it, her world has lost its colors.

Cho is an artist, but how can she draw if she doesn't have any colors?

Originally an entry to the Color of the Spectrum Series Part I challenge.
Reviewer: Phoebe Gruzelier Signed
Date: 04/03/08 Title: Chapter 1: One-shot

Artistic. Mournful. Fabulous. I loved it!

A new and individual take on grief. An artistic take as well, which suits Cho very well.

Her mum's boyfriend it a prat. A PRAT. As if schoolwork is the most important thing in the universe. He deserves to be boiled alive in a huge cauldron of wart-making potion. I hope Cho becomes an artist. That'll show him.

I loved all the different paint names. They all sound cool and make it sound like Cho knows what she's talking about.

Just one, small thing.

'She considers the possibility that while black is the color of loss white is the color of fresh starts.'---- correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure there should be a comma after 'loss'.

Anyway, great fic. One of your best yet!

Author's Response: :) Thanks! I\'m glad you enjoyed this fic! *can\'t stop grinning* ... And I think you\'re right about that comma. Thanks for pointing it out! *goes to fix it*