Summary: What happens when Dumbledore has his latest "brilliant" idea, to start an advice column, and call it 'Dear Dumby'? Letters from some of our favourite Hogwarts students, some of our not so favourite Hogwarts students, some not even Hogwarts students at all, and, of course, lots of madness!
Pre-HBP for obvious reasons!
Nominee for the Best Humour Award in the Quicksilver Quill Awards! Many thanks to all who voted for it!
Haha, Ginny dressed as Santa! That was priceless!! This chapter was really good. Oh and the whole plant thing was also great.
Author's Response: 10 reindeer pulling a you in a sledge in Antartica: Ł50. A big box of choclates already gift wrapped: Ł12.50. Ginny dressed as Santa: priceless!! Tee hee, thank you!!
The end of an era. I feel weird that there are not going to be more "Dear Dumby" chapters. You must be happy that you have now more time to dedicate to other fics and other projects.
The beginning of the chapter was great, it started with a bang and it hooks the readr instantly. That line was fenomenal "I always wanted to be a dentist" I'm still laughing about it.
Te next part was also funny the one with Ron and Hermione. He's like your thousend of childrens. I've always thought that they had an interesting dynamic and you get it quite well (of course, it's your OTp after all). I did catch a mistake though "remember you’re stupid," it should be "your stupid" instead if "you're" I make the same mistake all the time,
“No, no. Alright then, how about pinkie swear?” That was hilarious. There is something about Lucius and Voldy doing a pinky swear that it's just too funny. And the gardening club was also funny.
Yay!!! Finally Ron and Hermione hooked up, I wasn't expecting anything else. I loved their reaction when Harry caught them. Total denial, it was funny and very well written. Reharsing a play and mouth to muth breathing lol. I could really see that happening in the books.
My favorite line of the chapter was probably "how closely their children resembled sea slugs, both in brains and appearance" It was very funny, I had to stop reading and laugh out loud for a couple of seconds before continuing the story.
The ending was very cool, how Voldemort looked for someone to listen to him. Someone should tell him about therapists and how great they are. That way he wouldn't have to bother Bob. *chuckes*
I know you thanked a lot of people, but I have to thank you for writing this. Seriously, It was wonderful to read your work and you've given me a few good laughs. I'm sure "Dear Dumby" will become a classic between fanfic readers.
Author's Response: Once again, thank you for your wonderful review! *huggles Harald* Aw, I hope it will be the end of an era. I feel weird knowing there won\'t be any more Dear Dumby chapters too! I\'m not sure if I\'m happy or sad - a bit of both, really. I\'m sad that there won\'t be any more letters, advice, or chapters at all, but then I am happy to break free of it, and like you said, focus on other projects. So I\'m not sure.
Thanks - I must admit, that line was among one of my favourites too, so I\'m glad it\'s spreading the laughter! I\'m absolutely thrilled that you liked the humour and dynamics with Ron and Hermione, for as you stated, they are my OTP and I love (writing) them dearly, so it means a lot to me that you liked it. Thanks for catching that mistake - I\'ll go correct it now! I did feel sorry for Lucius on that one - things had gotten bad enough without Voldemort \"hoping to die\" - pinkie swear really was the only option!
I know - Ron/Hermione all the way!! (I didn\'t expect anything else either - but then I wrote it...) That scene has to be one of the most fun for me to write - even when they\'re together, they\'ll never be completely rid of the denial!
It\'s funny that you say that\'s your favourite line of the chapter, as it was actually a last minute add in when I was going over the chapter before sending it to my beta! The ending I felt would be a good way to end it - as Voldemort wouldn\'t be able to get over the trauma just like that - that wouldn\'t be realistic! *gigglesnort*
*huggles* Aw, thank you, Harald - I am so, so pleased that you\'ve enjoyed it, and thank you so much for your wonderful reviews, they really make my day. And I can safely say that it was absolutely no problem at all writing this - I\'ve had such a good time - I can\'t wait for my next humour fic! *cough* Ahem - I mean, next...er...bloomer...kit? *giggles* Wow, I really hope that it does become a classic - but only time will tell, eh? Thanks again for your lovely review! *huggles* *wipes away tear* *stops using asterisks* *giggles!*
Haha, This chapter was fantastic. I loved how you mixed Voldemort's speech with the list that Hermione was making it makes it very dinamic and a lot more fun to read. The pink hat part was the funniest one "Mrs. Cole always said that pink brought out the colour in my eyes!” That was priceless. You've cheered up my day, thank you.
Author's Response: Thank you Purplemage! I love your reviews, they always pick out nice bits! I\'ve got to admit, that\'s possibly my favourite line too! Well, I\'m glad I\'ve cheered up your day with this chapter, as your review has cheered up mine too!
You did it again!!! I liked Draco's letter the best, it was pretty funny with the wrinkle and all. Lucious' letter was also very funny. Who's the girl that's obsessed with harry?
Author's Response: Thank you! Sorry, but the girl who\'s obsessed with Harry isn\'t actually a canon character, but that letter will have something to do with the next chapter... I had fun with both the \'Stud\'s\' letters, so I\'m glad you liked them! Thanks for reviewing!!
I can't believe it took me so long to read this, but I did it in the end and it was defenetley worth it! Because I'm in Spew now, I shall go and leave you a spew worthy review...
"Well, even the best advice can sometimes backfire. Now, I’m not saying I gave you the best advice, as bad advice can backfire too" This was the best line of the whole chapter, it's very Dumbledore of him to write something like this. I couldn't stop laughing and then I read it again on the other letters and I laughed even more. I loved Dumbledore in this chapter, he's quite confused. He wants to keep helping the others, but he doesn't want to get them into more trouble. Give advice or not give advice? That's the question!
I think that it would sound better if you changed Harry's name when Dumby replies from "Wizard On My Robes" to "Wizard On His Robes", but that's just me.
The un-named Gryffindor girl letter was soooo funny! I think that one was the funniest. "It seems like I’m not used for anything except to make up numbers" What a great line! i couldn't stop laughing. I think there should be two invisible Gryffindor girls, I guess the other one is even more invisible because she doesn't have a voice.
I really can't come with who Miserable is. I think it's Snape, but I'm not too sure. If it's him than I'm glad he's miserable; he deserves it.
The endind was awesome with Dumby writing at himself, it was so clever! Especially his reply to himslef "I have absolutely no idea." LOL, poor Albus.
I'm so sad that this story is almost over *sniff* It's the end of an era! *clings to Kiara* Ok, maybe not that much, but still it's sad.
Author's Response: Wow, many congrats in getting into SPEW! And thanks for giving me a spew worthy review - whoa! I think this might be the longest one I\'ve ever gotten! *hugs Harald* Thank you!
I\'m really pleased you liked Dumbledore in this chapter, as it was quite hard keeping him in character as well as slightly confused! But to be honest - who can blame him? After all those letters and outcomes, who wouldn\'t be?!
Will change Dumby\'s reply to Harry\'s name, thanks for catching it! To be honest, I was a little hesitant to include the Un-Named Gryffindor Girl, so I\'m really glad you enjoyed that one! Yes, not sure where Invsi-Girl 2 is... Perhaps she got caught up in an unfortunate Potions mishap?
Nope, Miserable isn\'t Snape! (Lol, he does deserve it though!) It\'s someone who we\'ve seen in the last chapter, who is finding his inner-self - well, basically having a bit of a breakdown! This person definitely deserves to be miserable too though!
You know, I think Dumby\'s reply is one of my favourite bits too! I thought it a nice way to end it. *sobs* Ohmygosh - it\'s actually ending! It\'s so strange - my first ever fanfic, coming to a close! *clings back to Harald* What are we going to do?! ...Write and read some more, I guess! And there\'s still the last chapter (which I\'m really enjoying writing at the moment!)! Thank you for such a lovely review!
Hahahahaha, Cat Lover 121 Genius!!! It made me laugh so much!! hahahaha, and the one from Harry was very funny too. I would like to see a letter from hagrid that would be funny
Author's Response: Wow, I'm glad to be causing so much laughter!! A genius?! Moi?! Try telling that to my science teacher!! Sure, we can have a letter from Hagrid! But it will probably be in one of the later chapters, chapter 8 I'm thinking (I have them loosely planned out!)! Thanks for reviewing!!
Rated: [Reviews - ]
I like your story, I'm very interested I don't know what's going to happen. I love your description of Harry as a killing machine it all makes a lot of sense
Summary: Many years after the Final Battle, Hermione is still alive and well, the last among a group of heroes. She has survived, living despite the deaths of those she cared for most. By surviving, she has carried on the memory, the legacy, of the heroes of the Final Battle. Now, at the age of 108, Hermione is nearing the end of her time among the living, and will join those she loves once more. One-shot.
It was so beautiful and so sad. I loved it, you made cry!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. :D
Summary: “Sirius, how many times do I have to tell you that you can’t sing ‘Rocky Raccoon’ at the wedding?” Remus said in exasperation. Really, it was no wonder it had been so difficult for James and Lily to agree to let Sirius do something besides his speech.
This was a really sweet story. I was all mellowed by the end of it. I don't know why but weddings make me cry *takes out cleanex*, very very cute
Summary: A Mary Sue Parody fic! Infinity Babe has moved from New York to Hogwarts with her 'oh-so-evil' parents. Can Harry and the gang stop her from warping canon? Not to be taken seriously. Rated PG-13 for a reason. Scriptfic.
Hey Anna!! I must say that I just died laughing while reading this. It is completely hilarious!!!! I’m a huge fan of random humor and this was just it at it’s best, and who doesn’t like a good fic that makes fun of Mary-Sues? You took too long to update though!
Infinity is a lot of fun to read. She’s such an airhead! My favorite lines were “They don’t have tanning salons at Hogwarts? Oh no! The angst!” That one killed me, “Totally! Evil sucks.” LOL that should be an avi right there! “Then I saw that I’d forgotten to straighten my hair! It was horrific!” That one was totally awesome too.
I love how you portray the canon characters, they’re totally clichéd, but they are in a weird OOC in character. Do I make any sense? No, I didn’t think so. Anyway, Dumbledore’s crazy ninja beard is one of the craziest things I’ve ever read, at first I was like Wha??? But then I started laughing madly when I remembered the scene in Kill Bill and I imagined Dumbledore doing the same, but with his beard.
I loved the Hermione/Ron moment. “Like what? Buy the author a book on character development?” I think that was probably my favorite line from the whole chapter. That one and the one where Hermione explains where Mary-Sues come from made me laugh madly. I think it is so funny that they would actually have a lesson in DADA about the evil Mary-Sues. LOL
Well, in case you didn’t notice before, I really liked this. You have a unique sense of humor that I love. I hope that the next chapter doesn’t take too long to come out.
Great job Air Elemental!!!! I was laughing so laud during the whole thing. I especially liked the physical description of her and she also has hypnotic powers. Great job!
Summary: It's the night of Christmas Eve, and James is enlisting Remus' help in formulating a plan to snog Lily. After a bit of talk and some trouble with mistletoe, though, something that definitely wasn't planned happens.
This is the first Remus/James story I've read but it's really good. I loved the description you used to describe Remus feelings, they're very accuarate and makes you feel exactly like him i loved it!
Summary: Cedric Diggory was a promising young man, with his whole life before him, until he was murdered by the evil Lord Voldemort's servant Wormtail. The tragic end of such an exquisite young wizard. Or was it the end? Journey with Cedric through death. Where will he go? Who will he meet? Read this story to find out! Please review!!!
it was a really nice story to read, specially from a spirit's point of view. Defenetly a Cedric fan must read!
Summary: A Remus/Sirius one shot.
Remus is obsessed with Shakespeare. The OWL’s are over, but when Sirius and James produce the fruits for a merry celebration, will Remus succumb to the charms of the fiery nectar? Will the events that follow lead Remus to reveal another obsession he harbours? Rated PG-13 for surety. SSP – RL/SB. MWPP.
Wow, i really liked your story it was very heart filled, very sweet and even though I'm not a Shakespeare fan I really liked all the references. The scene with the alcohol was very funny, it remembered me to my first experience drinking. Keep up the good work.
Summary: Regulus Black only lasted a week. (HBP spoilers, ahoy.)
Updated 22/01 with the revised, beta-read version. :)
Great writing! I really like how you devided the piece through days. The relationship with Sirius was beautiful and very well thought. It's a believable fraternal love. It was very deep which is a rare thing in fan fictions.
Summary: Have you ever gotten halfway through an experimental kiss and realized that yes, this really was a good idea? Remember, it's the quiet, mousy ones you should look out for...
Sirius comes back from a Marauder jaunt with a sleeping rat curled up in his hair and a mood that won't quite go away.
A whiskery nose poked lightly at the side of Sirius’ jaw. Little ratty paws laid their claws lightly on his neck. Peter was awake and hoping for a little help changing back. Sirius held still and kept his breath regular. A small paw settled on his cheek. Sirius thought Peter could bloody well leave him alone and go back to sleep, since finally he was relaxed.
The pointy nose suddenly plunged into his ear and snuffled furiously, whiskers vibrating. Sirius wasn’t particularly ticklish, but everyone has limits. Sirius discovered his with a stifled yelp. “All right, all right!” he hissed, and fumbled for his wand. Pointing it over his shoulder, he performed the spell to help Peter back to his normal shape.
Awww, I've never read a Peter/Sirius fic before, but I'm glad I picked this one. The way peter laid in sirius' hair is very cute, makes me feel all mushy inside. Great job!
Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I\'ve never found a Peter/Sirius fic before, but somewhere out there others are sure to exist, no? Making them cute feels like a real accomplishment. Thanks again for reviewing!
Summary: One-shot Monologue challenge entry for Gryffindor.
Set in ancient Rome, this story follows the exploits of The first emperor of Rome, Augustus, and the events that rocked the Roman world just after the death of Julius Caesar.
Wow. what an amazing story! I swear, it's really really good! Since I'm in SPEW I can't gey away with this kinds of reviews so I will give you a proper one.
The introduction is superb, it transports the reader very quickly into the world of ancient rome. One of my favorite periods in world history, I might add. "I write my account to tell my tale - a tale of betrayal and sadness." What a great line! I sucks the reader right in.
The speech is lovely, I can see that you really wanted to give this man a voice that was proper to the period where her was living and it's not only in the narrative and the dialogue. I can see that you made a great deal of research to write this fic and i love that. It makes someone's work so much interesting when they do research. Kudos to you!
"I walked over to the body, lying there in a pool of blood, picked him up as a mother would her crying child" This one is another of my favorite lines and the image is beautiful as well. As a matter of fact, the whole piece is filled with beautiful imagery. The young child that represented Ceasar in the dreams with the dagger in his back it's another example.
"I wanted to taste every part of him and he wanted me to do so." I wanted to quote the whole paragraph, but that would've been a waste of space. The love scenes were so HOT!! Just the thought of two sweaty romans kissing each other....Ok, I better stop there, but you know what I mean.
The only critique I ave is that there were not many descriptions! Like settings and fisical descriptions of the characters, which is a real shame because that time period had a lot to offer in that department.
Other than that it's magnificent. The ending wow! it blew me away. I almost had a heart attack when I read that his name was changed to Regulus Black. When I started reading, i was wondering if there was any conection to Harry Potter at all, but you proved me wrong.
Awsome fic, really! It's become one of my favorites.
PS: I think I'm becoming a James fanboy! lol
Summary: "If you judge people, you have no time to love them." --Mother Teresa.
To love James, Lily needs to discover his better side. To earn Lily's love, James needs to fight his own prejudices -- and learn to cope with battle-scarred tomcats, toads, and the sneakier side of his own nature. This was a Ravenclaw entry for February's Challenges -- and it won, by the way.
The SSP warning is because I simply cannot resist sticking Peter and Sirius together at all possible opportunities, even in the background of other higher pursuits. Mild profanity will also occur, a natural side effect of putting James and Severus within shouting distance of each other.
This is a really nice story. I love the fact that Lily asked him to marry her, I didn't see that one coming. The Sirius-Peter relationship was also nicely handled. Great characterisations with all the characters. Congratulations on winning the Valentine Challenge, you deverve it! Again great story.
Author's Response: Thanks! Lily had to do the asking; otherwise, as I've been sketching her, James would still be patiently pursuing her about the countryside with a ring and we would have no Harry. Brains, beauty, a lovely sense of humour, but fundamentally contrary -- Harry had to get it from somewhere. She's a lot of fun to write. I need to find more good excuses to do so. Thanks for the review!
Summary: "It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” ~ Tennyson
One entry from the journal of Remus J. Lupin shortly after the death of Sirius Black ponders why the old adage is true.
Submission by orange_balloon of Gryffindor for the February Valentine’s Extra Credit Challenge.
Beautiful, just beautiful! I loved the scened in the kitchen, when he kissed Remus out of the blue. Also, everything fits with canon perfectly, it was very well planned. My favorite paragraph is the last one though, it almost made me cry. Great job!
Author's Response: Thanks so much, Purplemage! I\'m still entirely convinced that Remus and Sirius could very well be canon, so it fits in so easily. Their story really is such a sad one. I always feel so bad for Remus left all alone with the rest of his Marauders gone. I\'m glad you liked it.
Summary: A story of love, violence and tragedy as two friends fight against time to confess their love to one another, while the fight for Hogwarts rages around them. A Hannah/Ernie story.
Wow Air Elemental!!! This was very beautiful! I almost cried at the end. It was very tastefully written; it has a lot of beautiful descriptions. Congratulations it was an honour to be a finalist with your story.
Author's Response: Thanks Purplemage! Congratulations on winning!