Penname: Avian020391 [Contact]
Real name: Watermelon candy wrapper
Member Since: 11/13/04
Website:
Beta-reader: 0
Status: Member
Bio:
Please note that this wasn't written by me; it was written by my 18-year-old sister. I thought I would get a better perspective if I made someone else type my bio (or pretend to think so in order to appear more philosphical than I really am). But everything in brackets and the watermelon candy bit is mine. She wrapped me.

Hi. I'm watermelon candy wrapper. Not really, but you shouldn't give your true name out on the internet, or big green monsters will come and eat you up. And have your family for dessert. And your friends for soup.

Boo. Scared you, didn't I? (*re-reads above paragraph and screams in fright*)

I stare at things a lot. My sister says this gives me a pop-eyed myopic frog look. I think it makes me look brilliant. I like to read funny things, and to make sure people are happy and free of spam.

I haunt mugglenet, and (because a certain myopic frog behind me is croaking with the syllables 'gi gont') I think I can speak clearly with my mouth closed and full of ginger ale. (Which tastes good)

Cheerio,

WC (!)... W
(Ah, yes, and I'm 13, incase that was the reason you read this. But don't you dare turn that into a subject for criticism - treat me like any of the other authors on this site or I'll give the big green monsters a new item on their menu.)(*Giggles girlishly, incase that was the other reason you read this for*).
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Reviews by Avian020391
 

Summary: And now, the smash-hit comedy sequel you've all been waiting for, featuring the other guy you all love to hate!

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 352 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/06/04 Updated: 11/06/04


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 01/04/05 Title: Chapter 1: The Confessions Of Severus Snape

Pretty funny, just one thing I want to point out. You ended one diary entry with Snape rushing off to a slumber party, and continued what happened in the next one. The story would have flowed better if you started the latter entry with "there was a slumber party last night", because otherwise it turns into a meaningless sentence just hanging around.

Author's Response: Umm... there WAS no damn slumber party. Don't criticise what you don't read.

 

Of Rats and Drainpipes by Loki MM
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 16]

Summary: It all started when the Slytherin Quidditch captain threw a curse at Peter, who transformed and hid. In the sink of the third-floor boys bathroom. And got stuck. It's up to the other three Marauders to get him out. COMPLETE

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1615 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/06/04 Updated: 11/06/04


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 01/04/05 Title: Chapter 1: Um ... of Rats and Drainpipes

Well, you write alright, but the main point of the fic has been defeated; there isn't much humour in it. I guess this would do better under the 'general' section.

 

by
Rated: [Reviews - ]

Summary:

Categories: Orphan Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 0 Chapters: 0 Completed: No
Published:
12/31/69 Updated: 12/31/69


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/27/04 Title: None

That paragraph thing is one point. The other is that your description isn't the most captivating, so the story doesn't flow too well. Other than that, its fine.

 

Born the Day You Kissed Me by CLee
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 1262]

Summary: I was born the day you kissed me...I died inside the night you left me...But oh how I lived while you loved me. . . .


The sequel Agapanthus is up!

Categories: Hermione/Draco Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Sexual Situations, Violence

Word count: 71595 Chapters: 24 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/07/04 Updated: 02/27/06


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/13/04 Title: Chapter 1: Home for the Holidays

Damn enthralling! It has just the right mix of descriptiveness, pace...keep up the awesome work!

 

by
Rated: [Reviews - ]

Summary:

Categories: Orphan Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 0 Chapters: 0 Completed: No
Published:
12/31/69 Updated: 12/31/69


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/13/04 Title: None

Bloody hilarious! I love these chaotic bunches of jokes! Keep it up! Boy, I'm giggling so much, I could pass as drunk...

 
Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/19/04 Title: None

Still hilarious! But the chapter was filled with much more "random humour", so I'm hoping the original story gets back on track (random humour isn't my favorite). 10/10. By the way, why isn't this in the humour section?

 
Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/17/04 Title: None

Still brimming with humour! Maintain the pace! 9/10

 

Cupid and His Twin by Leora V
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 28]

Summary: Valentine's Day is nigh at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and an unexpected couple is making the halls buzz. But are Malfoy and Hermione really made for each other, or is it just another joke?

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 7210 Chapters: 4 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/09/04 Updated: 12/17/04


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/14/04 Title: Chapter 2: Two: The Truth Revealed... to Those Who Pay Attention

Rather sweet and funny. The irony is portrayed pretty well.

 

by
Rated: [Reviews - ]

Summary:

Categories: Orphan Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 0 Chapters: 0 Completed: No
Published:
12/31/69 Updated: 12/31/69


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/13/04 Title: None

Wonderfully well-written. Very captivating - I'm really anticipating future chapters.

 

An Unlikely Pair by Kyte
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 195]

Summary: Draco Malfoy finds something out about Hermione Granger and Harry Potter, that other people must not find out about! But in return for not telling anyone Draco is asking for something...

Categories: Hermione/Draco Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 15473 Chapters: 14 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/11/04 Updated: 12/01/04


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/17/04 Title: Chapter 3: Remembering

For a chapter so short, that's pretty darn sweet! Obviously well written - flows smoothly.

 

by
Rated: [Reviews - ]

Summary:

Categories: Orphan Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 0 Chapters: 0 Completed: No
Published:
12/31/69 Updated: 12/31/69


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/13/04 Title: None

Its alright - looks like there's the potential to turn into a good story. Although the bit with Ron was pretty quick, and since it consisted mainly of conversation, I didn't really "feel" for it. But nice overall.

 
Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/22/04 Title: None

A little lacking in the area of fullstops, don't you think? And sometimes I missed the difference between double quotes and single quotes, so the flow was interrupted.

 
Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/17/04 Title: None

I thought it was OK. I guess you can take your time because there are a lot of other Hermione/Draco fics that are being updated.

 

Addicted by Lady Wolf
Rated: [Reviews - 35]

Summary: Skeletons in the proverbial closet? Hidden talents that drive one mad? Obsessive compulsive behavior? All this and more can be found within this trilogy of insanity. Characters admit their addictions and, for the most part, have nothing to be ashamed about.

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: Slash

Word count: 2806 Chapters: 3 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/14/04 Updated: 11/16/04


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/16/04 Title: Chapter 2: Addicted Two

Darn hilarious! 9/10...although this chapter was more culturally specific than the last, so I didn't get a few jokes.

 

by
Rated: [Reviews - ]

Summary:

Categories: Orphan Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 0 Chapters: 0 Completed: No
Published:
12/31/69 Updated: 12/31/69


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 04/07/05 Title: None

A little tip: have you noticed that 5 sentences start with 'As he' or 'As she'? It would sound a bit better if there wasn't so much repetition. Other than that, I think the story can go pretty far.

 

by
Rated: [Reviews - ]

Summary:

Categories: Orphan Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 0 Chapters: 0 Completed: No
Published:
12/31/69 Updated: 12/31/69


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 01/07/05 Title: None

The jokes were definitely good. One thing that you might want to avoid though is using the same word twice in consecutive sentences. But it's still hilarious.

Author's Response: Avian020391- Thanks for reading and reviewing my story! I'm glad you thought it was funny. I also appreciate the advice and tried to watch out for that when I wrote the second chapter. Thanks!

 

by
Rated: [Reviews - ]

Summary:

Categories: Orphan Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 0 Chapters: 0 Completed: No
Published:
12/31/69 Updated: 12/31/69


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 11/30/04 Title: None

Wow...well, written, going good!

 

by
Rated: [Reviews - ]

Summary:

Categories: Orphan Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 0 Chapters: 0 Completed: No
Published:
12/31/69 Updated: 12/31/69


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 01/04/05 Title: None

Virtually Impeccable! Definite 10/10, but sometimes your lists get too repetitive. Sugestions...um...how about Felix concocts a potion that sends all his potential opponents bonkers - it could open up some humorous possibilities. For some reason I'm thinking of Neville making unexpected comments on erotic paralellograms. But Whatever.

Author's Response: Suggestions always appreciated! I'll throw in something similar...errotic paralellograms? Sure, why not! Thanks for the review - update coming soon!

 

Summary: This is basically Ron's diary. It doesn't really get funny until part two. This takes place sometime after fourth year. This is just Ron writing down...well whatever you write in a diary! Oh there is a little bit of language and a little bit of crude humor. I hope you like it!

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 3915 Chapters: 4 Completed: Yes
Published:
12/12/04 Updated: 02/17/05


Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 01/06/05 Title: Chapter 2: PART TWO

Chapter 2 was darn funny, but I really didn't like the crude humour. Anyway, i'm giving your story a ten just to boost the rating (because it definitely deserves a better one).

 
Reviewer: Avian020391 Signed
Date: 01/11/05 Title: Chapter 3: PART THREE

Excellent random humour! My sister didn't appreciate it, but she is 18. When you're 18, anything that isn't comparible to Wodehouse (she claims for hilarity, I claim for a lot of useless words) is branded as 'stupid', so don't listen to her. The point is to make people laugh, which this story is VERY GOOD AT. My sister is over my shoulder spouting scornful comments like 'that didn't make me laugh' while I endlessly spite her in this review. She still, however, thinks I am an annoying bug, but I'm now just ranting (now she calls me and annoying ranting bug and...oh forget it, this must sound like such a crazy review. I wouldn't be surprised if people think I'm schizophrenic).

 
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