I just wanted to let APoE readers know that I'm participating in Nanowrimo. It may be a little while before you get another update. We'll see. :)
Summary: A short character-study exploring Remus' feelings in the days after Hallowe'en 1981.
(The world is strange; strange and old and sometimes dead, but mostly, it is living.)
Story discussed in the DADA class on mugglenet's fan fiction forums.
You have a lovely way with words. I know you write poetry, too, so perhaps this explains it. There is such a rhythmic flow to your writing--the way the words and syllables are stressed and placed really makes the meaning and feeling in this piece shine.
For some reason, the line evening is a false pretender really captured my interest. It sounds like a song title, and you can just imagine the emotional story that is laced between those words. Anyhow, you do Remus justice here. I also liked the bit with Dumbledore, where they both know that Remus is lying, yet neither feels the need to address it. So true to both characters. Anyhow, I hope you continue to write wonderful stories like this. You're very talented.
Author's Response: Thank you so much, cor_leonis. I think you\'ve found out already that every metaphor, word - or at least I try - are put and placed in a way to express emotions and tell of a story past. I am happy the dialogue sounds well. That spesifiyed time with Remus and Dumbledore I especially tried to do justice: it was one of the time there was a real conversation, and due to the importance of it I had to convey the feeling that those two person stand close enough to each other to understand that the other don\'t want to talk about it. In general, I wanted to convey the feeling of companionship, and that Dumbledore wasn\'t there to ask out about it, but to just be there. Be the comforter. Because Remus severely needed it at that time, and it was those words - those wise, deliberate words of Dumbleo (which I too used a lot of time on) - was the beginning of turnaroud for Remus, and therefore to the story too.
Summary: Sirius has always wondered what fear really is like. Told in second person, this is a non-rhyming poem exploring Sirius's feelings of fear.
QSQ Poetry Award Winner.
This was really lovely--evocative imagery. I'll be the first to admit that I am completely clueless when it comes to writing poetry, so my knowledge (or lack thereof, really) is limited to what I like, and how I interpret it. But this is really very telling of fear. I really like how you structured your poem, with the breaks and the pauses and the interjections. It reads like art, if that makes any sense. My favorite lines were:
all guesses, all mere
hollow thoughts without that
room for slight correctness,
based on not-facts,
and nothing else.
I think it describes Sirius' situation clearly. Well done. :)
Author's Response: I wasn\'t much into poetry before, either; it started four months ago reading the works of William Carlos Williams (you know who he is?), and took off from there, to be honest. And I think I\'ve written, in that time, around twenty poems, this being one in the middle. You know, that part was my favourite as well: it was one of those sentences that just came. Thank you very much, cor_leonis. :)