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Reviews by midwife_witch

Roses Of Yesterday by Raven_Stag

Rated:48 Reviews
Summary: In the three years since Harry left Hogwarts he secluded himself away from those he loves. Wrapped in his own depression he receives a phone call that promises to change his current fate forever. Not only is chapter seven up but EIGHT as well!
Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 1: Prologue

Ron and Luna's wedding? Hmmm... Okay, you have me hooked. A good start, though it shares the same proofreading errors that seem to plague most fanfics ("somewhat" is one word, not two, lack of subject-verb agreement, etc.). Work on the writing, but your ideas sound good. Off to the next chapter!

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 2: Call from the Past

You're really good at building "what happens next?" interest. However, a little more backstory would help to make these first two chapters hang together. For example, how on earth did Harry and Hermione go from near-inseparability in school to virtually no contact now? And why on earth hasn't Harry opened that package after three years? This may all become clear in later chapters, but for now, it doesn't quite ring true. Still, kudos to you for writing at all -it takes guts and creativity to write for a fan base like this. :)

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 3: The Leaky Cauldron

Okay, pretty interesting. So Viktor's back on the scene, eh? Interested to see what you'll do with that. BTW, it's "announced" not "enounced".

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 4: Abduction

Have you seen "When Harry Met Sally"? You're probably too young, but this scene has a lot in common with the one where Sally cries on Harry's shoulder after her ex gets engaged. Still lots of proofreading mistakes ("a sleep" instead of "asleep"), but your dialogue captures Harry and Hermione's voices well. Since dialogue is always harder to write than narration, that's a pretty good accomplishment.

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 5: For Always

A. Harry would never turn down a request for help from Hermione. B. Hermione would never (at least not as of book 6) say someone "didn't have the balls" to do something. This chapter strains the limits of credulity. The ring is a nice touch, though, and helps make sense of your mention of French in the first chapter.

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 6: Tea At the Weasley's

Nice ensemble piece - you capture the feel of these four old friends hanging out together quite well. I especially like how you handled Ron: Grown up, but still a bit spastic. :) I didn't really buy Harry's declaration of love, though - it's just too abrupt, and you don't give us enough insight into how he arrives at this conclusion. All in all, though, a good chapter.

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 7: Betrayal

Very nice! Hermione falls for the kind of trap that usually gets Harry - a very clever twist. And who among us ever really trusted Viktor Krum? Well done!

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 8: The Graveyard

It feels like there's a chapter missing here that explains how Harry wound up at the graveyard. And Voldemort spends way too much time explaining himself. This slows down the really strong lead-up you had coming into this chapter.

Spirits in the Future by JessicaH

Rated: 1st-2nd Years • 587 Reviews
Summary: Voldemort attacks the Potters, James and Lily try to protect their beloved baby boy. Then suddenly they're in a house they do not know. Harry isn't with them and they don't know what happened. Where are they? And who are the redhead children running down the stairs? Why have they been sent? The story is placed in the future, years after Voldemort's death, but danger is still lurking. Features Harry/Ginny and Ron/Hermione.

Joint winner in the genfic category of the Multifaceted Fanfiction Awards
Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 10/01/05 Title: Chapter 13: Quidditch match

Ouch, just when I think the movies aren't ruining my memories of the books... Thanks for setting me straight. I introduced my 7-year-old daughter to this story yesterday and now she's tearing through it. We really love the story; thanks for writing it.

Author's Response: Thank you for reading it. I'm glad you are both enjoying it.

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/29/05 Title: Chapter 13: Quidditch match

I'm thoroughly enjoying this story, but just one little quibble: Wasn't James a seeker, not a chaser? I'm at work and don't have my books with me, so I can't check, but wasn't that the whole point of him playing with the Snitch in OOTP?

Author's Response: According to the films he was a seeker, but according to a JKR interview he was a chaser. The books don't state anything on the matter so I'm choosing JKR's word over the films here.

And I'm glad you are enjoying the story.

Master of Enchantment by Subversa

Rated: Professors • 196 Reviews
Summary: Winner in the Best Mid-Length Story and Best Romance categories in Round One of the Most Potente Passions SSHG Awards.

It begins the summer after Seventh Year, when the war is raging on, with an unexpected moment of tenderness. What is this inexplicable feeling Hermione experiences? And how can she get Snape to discuss it with her, when all he wants to do is avoid her? Rating for last chapter, only.
Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 04/27/06 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 3

EWWWWW!!!!!! I can't believe I'm reading this. You're a really good writer; it's just that the thought of Snape and Hermione makes me ill. Ah well - on with the story.

Author's Response: I discovered fan fiction here on MNFF, just about a year ago. When I saw the pairing of SS/HG I was horrified. I won\'t even tell you how I felt about the slash. But I read Ancientgirl\'s stories, and I was hooked. So, I can appreciate how you feel about it. As for me, I\'ve scarcely come up for breath since I began, about a year ago ...

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 04/27/06 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 5

Okay, this is all very good right up to the Journey song. Maybe it's because I grew up hearing it relentlessly overplayed, but it takes this story from weirdly Interesting AU to cheesy. I mean, I'm a total creampuff and I can't hear that song without sneering; Snape would never in a million years put up with it. Otherwise, great chapter. Who knew Hermione was such a randy little thing? :)

Author's Response: Awww, you are severe on my muscial taste! It\'s okay, I can survive it. I\'m still chuckling. Please remember it was my first fan fiction attempt. I\'m (slightly) better now ;)

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 04/27/06 Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 6

Excellent. Can't think of how Ron and Harry will react when they get those invitations, but excellent.

Author's Response: LOL! Isn\'t that the truth? Thank you for the review!

Harry Potter and the Needed One by king

Rated: 1st-2nd Years • 74 Reviews
Summary: SPOILER WARNING! Events in HBP are discussed. This story picks up immediately after the funeral as Harry and his friends leave Hogwarts on the train. During the summer that follows Harry’s sixth year he begins his lonely quest to destroy Lord Voldemort. He finds two of the items that he is seeking and a truth he has been attempting to avoid. This chapter covers the trip to London on the Hogwarts Express after Dumbledore’s funeral. Why are Professors McGonagall and Flitwick on the train? Why is Hermione crying on someone else’s shoulder? What is Percy Weasley up to?
Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1 Bound for London

_So_ much better than the average fanfic! Even though it's categorized as a romance fic there's non-romantic substance to it that's believable. Better yet, Harry doesn't burst into tears (which everyone else seems to have him do). Well done you!

Author's Response: Harry's tough, it takes a lot to make him cry.

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2 The End of a Long Hard Day

Again, excellent! Great idea putting Kingsley in Hermione's group, since he's the one most likely to make it onto the Muggle news. So much for the idea that he'll be the new OotP leader, though... Keep up the good work!

Author's Response: Thanks! I like Kingsley Shacklebolt but... it was just another way of shaking up poor Harry.


Rated: Reviews
Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/05/05 Title: None

I agree with your first reviewer - subtle, and nicely done, if a little hard to envision post-HBP. Watch your editing - a few syntactical errors slipped through. Keep up the good work!

Author's Response: Yeah, sorry, I forgot to include that this story was written as though HBP never happened (because that's how it is in my mind :-P). Thank you so much for your review!

The Swing by tonks442

Rated: 1st-2nd Years • 66 Reviews
Summary: A neglected swing in the yard of the Burrow is more than it seems in this fluffy R/Hr short short ficlet. Written Pre-HBP.

Over 3000 reads and only a few reviews! Please, please review! Thank you so much!
Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 09/26/05 Title: Chapter 1: The Swing

Sweet, in a low-key sort of way. I'm not sure Ron would behave this calmly and sensitively, but we can always hope, can't we? In any case, I liked the framing device of the swing and the Engorgement Charm was a clever touch. Keep writing!

Author's Response: Lol, we sure can hope! Thanks for reading!


Rated: Reviews
Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 11/28/05 Title: None

I'm really liking this story. The part about Molly fretting at the Burrow was especially poignant. Only one minor quibble, though: Harry and Ginny making love in the Gryffindor common room? Puh-leeze... Even if it is Christmas Break, that's a little public for a couple that's trying to keep their relationship under wraps. The Room of Requirement would almost certainly have appeared for them if they were that desperate. :) Otherwise, bravo!

Author's Response: Of course it would have appeared, but no one else is there, and Harry isn\'t really being as discreet as he thinks he is now is he? Anyway, thanks for the great review. You can find chapter four if you follow the link in my profile to my LJ.

Never what it seems by Rons chick

Rated: 3rd-5th Years • 277 Reviews
Summary: Ginny is now 24 years old. She is well-known and famous. But during a press-conference, memories of her past begin to come back to her. She goes back to the summer she turned 16. The summer that changed her life. But Hermione and Harry are acting strangely. What is really going on? POV of Ginny at first and then changes! HBP spoilers.

I Know It's Been A While, But CHAPTER 17 IS UP!

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 04/20/06 Title: Chapter 1: Back in time

Please please please use paragraphs! And don't keep switching points of view/using unclear pronoun references. This is a potentially interesting story that's being undermined by your writing style.

Author's Response:

Author's Response: Eeek. Harsh. Umm, you are right, actually. Sorry about that. This was my first fanfic ever and I didn\'t have a beta for the first couple of chapters; therefore, they suck. I hope you read the rest of the story, tho. It gets better, I promise! And - just for you - I will go back and edit the first couple of chapters, now that I am better at writing. Manda*

The Time is Now by Hermione816

Rated: 3rd-5th Years • 1038 Reviews
Summary: The most succinct summary ever!! My "Book 7" told with revolving POVs from Hermione, Ron and Harry's perspectives. It's got it all! Romance, mystery, intrigue, Horcruxes, humor, international travel, house-elves, new characters, Voldy, the Burrow, and at least one wedding...

Reviewer: midwife_witch Signed
Date: 05/04/06 Title: Chapter 28: Curiosities and Treasures

You won't kill any of the Trio? Okay, then, you must not be part of the "totally evil Snape"school, because why would he just stun these two instead of AKing them if he were evil? Hmmm... Something to think about. Anyway, I wholeheartedly agree with the reviewer who complimented your ability to write an authentic-feeling setting. I loved the cobblestone street, and I also loved the fact that the witches' laughter made Hermione miss her own close friends. The parallel photos were inspired as well. All very telling (and tender) details. Well done!

Author's Response: Thanks much...also, as I queried below, who says Snape is evil?? And remember, I write based on canon - there\'s nothing equivocal in HBP that says Snape was doing anything except exactly what Albus Dumbledore told him to....more soon...stay tuned!