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Reviews by turquoiseturkeyz

A Granger-Weasley Disturbance by HermioneG

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Neville Lonbottom struggles to finish his homework, but that is difficult. And it does not become any easier when Ron and Hermione arrive, bickering...
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 06/13/12 Title: Chapter 1: A Granger-Weasley Disturbance

I loved this so much! I am a little dubious of the accuracy though but... WOW!

Talking To My Head About It by HermioneG

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: I didnt do that, I didnt do that, I didnt do that, I didnt do that, I didnt do that, I didnt! It didnt happen. Its never happened. I didnt do it, I didnt do it, I didnt do it, I didnt do it, I didnt- OH, GOD, I DID! A slightly amusing one-shot about Lily Evans.
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 06/13/12 Title: Chapter 1: Talking To My Head About It

I think I am falling love!
You are an amazing writer.

What Would You Do? by ron lover

Rated: 6th-7th Years • Past Featured Story

WINNER! in the 2010 QSQ for best Canon Romance story. Thank you so much!

I take a deep breath so my voice won’t shake.

“What would you do if we died tomorrow?”

He takes a step away from me, but still keeps me in his arms. “What?”

“What would you do if you knew that we died tomorrow?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“Don’t give me that, James. You know that we are going to die soon. There is no point in pretending that we aren’t.”

James and Lily have a conversation two days before Halloween.

Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 06/15/12 Title: Chapter 1: What Would You Do?

I think I am going to cry. This is most fanominal, a genuine piece of art. I love this one shot. I think you mastered the one shot with finality. I do not need more.

Author's Response: Wow. That is quite the review. Thank you so, so much. I am deeply grateful for this review. I truely am happy that you enjoyed the story.

Grave Days by Northumbrian

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Front page: THE DAILY PROPHET 4 May 1998


Editors Note: At the request of the Ministry for Magic this Official Statement issued by the Office of the Minister is produced full and unedited.


This official statement has been compiled with the assistance and co-operation of Mr Harry Potter.

“Lord Voldemort” was, in fact a man named Tom M. Riddle, son of a witch, Merope Gaunt and a Muggle, Tom Riddle Senior. The Ministry has decided that in all future official publications Riddle will be referred to by his given name.

There has already been much speculation and wild rumour regarding the events at Hogwarts School. The Ministry can confirm that Tom M. Riddle was killed at dawn on the morning of Saturday, 2 May. Riddle was disarmed by Harry Potter while in the act of firing a killing curse at Mr Potter. The curse killed Riddle rather than its intended target.

Continued on page 4


Despite the Official Ministry Statement (published above) we are no closer to receiving an answer to the question on the lips of every witch and wizard in the country. Where is Harry Potter?

It appears that Mr Potter left Hogwarts School early yesterday morning, apparently in the company of his close associates Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley. An attractive young Ministry clerk, who did not wish to be named, told The Prophet “He’s at the Ministry, having an important meeting with the Minister. My friends and I saw him. He asked us out to the pub, but we had to turn him down.” This statement is at odds with a report from the Portkey Office that Mr Potter has fled the country, travelling to Australia with his companions.

Continued on page 2

The days after the battle were days of grief and mourning. Grave Days.
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/16/12 Title: Chapter 2: Emotions Exhumed

In the 6th paragraph from the end, the first sentence might have a typo you did not notice, "anyone about else about the Horcruxes ". Other wise I like it very much. Though, and I might be late in saying this but, this plot seems to have rush forward, a bit, in the middle. It is only my opinion and I am sure you had a reason.

Author's Response: Ellorah
Thanks for letting me know. I’ll fix the typo. It took me two reads of your review to spot it! This was the first fanfic I started, and you’re probably right about the pacing, it certainly rushed towards the conclusion. Chalk it up to inexperience (although I’m probably still making the same mistakes). I keep meaning to take another look at this story.

Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/18/12 Title: Chapter 1: Sepulchral Mist

I always thought that Hagrid might have been close to the Creevey brothers, I was under the impression Denis rather admired him after the ordeal before the sorting ceremony in book four. I would have guessed at his attendance to Collins funeral.
I suspect that like you said earlier inexperience or it never having occurred to you might might played a part in his absence. There really seemed to be little flaw in this and is quite good if it is your first work.

Author's Response: Ellorah
I will admit to ignoring Hagrid in all of my stories. It’s an oversight which I really must try to remedy.
The fact that the first story I chose to write was novel-length probably says more about my inexperience as a writer than anything else. My many betas (especially the ones for this story) deserve a huge thank you.

The Mind of Arthur Weasley by Northumbrian

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
The kitchen at the Burrow has six occupants, Harry, Ginny, Ron, Hermione, Molly and Arthur. The youngsters look nervous. Arthur suspects that they are up to something. What is going on inside…

The Mind of Arthur Weasley

Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 06/27/12 Title: Chapter 1: The Mind of Arthur Weasley

So cute! I love his affection towards the end.
Your one-shot puts words to a speculation I had of Arthur's behavior a while back.

Author's Response:
Thank you.
Arhur has always intrigued me.

It Takes Two (a Duet) by Northumbrian

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: A typical day in the lives of Mr and Mrs H J Potter suddenly becomes far from typical when Harry makes a chance discovery.
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/11/12 Title: Chapter 1: It Takes Two (a Duet)

My mother received 6 girls from my father before she finally had a boy with her ex-boyfriend. I usually find it hard to connect with any of the small details in your stories despite the fact the you are obviously a consistent and quality writer. I will presume it is because you actually live in England (I am American). It was nice to finally read about family, as mine is 300 or more strong. I do however find that Harry is a little off in this one but he seems to come to terms with his crazily obvious mistake. All in all it is really well put together, it flows smoothly and enchantingly engaging even with it's cliche plot.

Author's Response: Thanks for the review.
I’m sorry that you find it difficult to connect with the “small details”. I’m a British writer, writing about British characters in a British setting, so I’m curious about to what “small details” cause you problems. Harry was, I hope, no more “off” than most blokes who accidentally discover that they’re about to become fathers. The story was written for a challenge on another site, and I had to work within the confines of that challenge.

Fred and George's Busy Day by Northumbrian

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
WINNER of the BEST GENERAL story – Quicksilver Quills Awards 2010.
In the weeks and months after their eldest brother’s wedding Fred and George Weasley continued to run their business. Two decent honest and respectable businessmen, they had no involvement at all in any illicit conduct. They certainly didn’t get involved in any anti-Voldemort activities. Definitely not. No. Not them. Never. They wouldn’t. Honestly.
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/14/12 Title: Chapter 2: Fred and George's Busy Day

Ha Ha Ha! That was brilliant! I can imagine this as their departure into hiding! I loved this, it was a very neat expression of Fred and George's personality!

Author's Response: Thank you.
Fred and George, fearlessly fighting Voldemort by making Deathe Eaters look foolish.

Sleepless Night by Northumbrian

Rated: 6th-7th Years • Past Featured Story
Summary: Life with the Potters is always interesting. What emergency could haul Deputy Head Auror Harry Potter from his bed in the middle of the night?
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/15/12 Title: Chapter 1: Sleepless Night

I am a little embarrassed to say that this is the fanfiction that told me you are a guy. I usually reserve judgement but I failed while reading all your other fiction. I came back to read this again and remembered my epiphany.

Author's Response: It was this one? Fair enough, this, and First Sight are probably giveaways, although having said that, I suspect thar The Question is a giveaway, too. -N-

Moon by Northumbrian

Rated: 6th-7th Years •
**WINNER in the BEST ORIGINAL CHARACTER (Mark Moon) – Quicksilver Quills Awards 2010.**
Meet Mark Moon, a bailiff in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement (Scottish Office). Mark has girl problems, or a problem girl, he isn't certain which. The girl is named Lavender.
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/19/12 Title: Chapter 4: Transit

Ten point for alliteration in the first sentence!

Author's Response: On rereading it, I wonder if I ovedidi it. *sigh* -N-

The Secret Diary of Hermione Granger by Northumbrian

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Four years after the Battle, a strange desire draws Hermione Granger. What could possibly make her visit Malfoy Manor?
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 06/24/12 Title: Chapter 1: The Secret Diary of Hermione Granger

Absolutely brilliant! I thought it was most magnificent.

Author's Response: Thank you. -N-

Spontaneity by Northumbrian

Rated: Professors •
Summary: Hermione (and Ginny) chose to return to Hogwarts to study. Harry and Ron joined the Auror Office. It's the Easter holidays, two weeks home from school for the girls, but their boyfriends are both working. The all important NEWT exams are approaching, Hermione's revision schedule is already carefully planned. Will she find time for Ron? What about Harry and Ginny?
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/13/12 Title: Chapter 1: Hermione

Do you reflexively respond to every review? I can imagine some do no more than compliment, but it is nice to know that you care about your readers personal opinions. I was a little wary as the "fluffy smut" progressed but it cut of nicely. I have read many smutty but badly written stories (there are some that are nice, though); yours leaves a lot to the imagination.
I think I can connect to Hermione's point of view the most as she is reviled to have read about the deed before having done it. A fine point to make for a girl, who no doubt, reads millions of books both muggle and wizard.
In response to your answer to my It takes two review, I know nothing about British speech patterns, geography, and small social norms than what I have siphoned from J. Rowling, Philippa Gregory and (most the silly) Downton Abbey; I generally like to make a connection to the authors description of a location with what I have seen. It is nothing you should be offended about.
~ Ellorah

Author's Response: Ellorah
Yes, I reply to every review. Even a simple “Great” will get a “thanks”. If someone is interested enough to leave a review, then they deserve to get a reply.
My personal view is that leaving a lot to the imagination is the best thing to do. Even competent professional writers tend to avoid writing raunchy scenes. Hermione will always try to prepare herself by reading. By the time Rose is born she’ll probably have a couple of shelves of pregnancy and baby care books. Ron won’t have read any of them. :-)
I’m well aware of many of the differences between English (US) and English (UK), as MSWord calls them (personally, I call the latter English :-D). I try to retain the Britishness of the stories, I hope that I don’t overdo it. The social mores of Downton are slightly outdated, but not as much as you might think.

I'll Miss You by Quill And Ink

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: September first was not a day Hermione was looking forward to. As she boards the train, she
must say goodbye to those she loves.
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 06/14/12 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Artfully written, the passion and detail of the characters reflects your dedication to the story written. There is definitely a note to be taken on your understanding of Joanne Rowling's writing style.

Swimsuit Quidditch by Northumbrian

Rated: 6th-7th Years •
It is Ginny’s twentieth birthday, and she wants to play a game with Harry.

Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/15/12 Title: Chapter 1: Swimsuit Quidditch

Oh! Classic Ginny! This has put my sexy, teenage chest club flirting to shame!

Author's Response: Thanks, this is certainly ginny being naughty. -N-

Strangers at Drakeshaugh by Northumbrian

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
The locals in a sleepy corner of the Cheviot Hills are surprised to discover that they have new neighbours.

Who are the strangers at Drakeshaugh?

Nominated for: Best Post-Hogwarts (Chaptered) story - Quicksilver Quills 2011
Nominated for: Best Post-Hogwarts (Chaptered) story - Quicksilver Quills 2012
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/18/12 Title: Chapter 1: The Drop Off

I only realized last night that when you mentioned chocolate biscuits you meant cookies (American). I should really have payed more attention as I really did know better.
I like this story and I can not help looking for the next chapter. It was the first I read of yours.

Author's Response: Ellorah
Cookies are simply one sort of biscuit. :-) Oh, the joys of writing for an international audience.
I’m working on the next chapter, but it’s proving troublesome.

Players Rites by Northumbrian

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Ginny Weasley is about to play her first ever professional Quidditch Game. Why aren't her team mates ready?
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/20/12 Title: Chapter 1: The Changing Room

Ahhh! Rituals, the perfect way eat, open doors, kill, fart, and win International games!
(You do not want to know about the farting)

Author's Response: I don't? I'll take your word for it. :-D -N-

Is Draco Malfoy a Git? by Northumbrian

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: This important question needs to be answered. Reputations are at stake.
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/19/12 Title: Chapter 1: At the Wizard Courts

What in the world was the original case about?
I say guilty! (I say so as I doubt it will lead to any harm and in addition make Ron oddly happy)
Please tell me it was not about the portcuffs.

Author's Response: The original case?
Thi is the only story which I don't consider to form part of my timeline. Simply because I don't think that wizards are stupid enough to allow the ridiculous UK libel laws to become part of wizarding law.

The Professor and his Landlady by Northumbrian

Rated: 6th-7th Years •
Summary: Neville and Hannah make several life-changing decisions. Luna helps, too.

This is Northumbrian of Ravenclaw writing for the Great Hall Cotillion
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/18/12 Title: Chapter 1: The Professor and his Landlady

I am a little sad to say I can not judge this very well. It was a lovely little mix of confusion and failed communication I loved it but my ability to scrutinize the characters parts in this story ends there. *Sigh* Ah, well! Love for the story should satisfy you, yes?

Author's Response: Ellorah
It always does, thanks :-)

April Fool by Northumbrian

Rated: 6th-7th Years •
Summary: George's birthday is never truly happy. Will this year be any different?

Great Hall Cotillion story No.3 from Northumbrian
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 07/13/12 Title: Chapter 1: April Fool

Hot Damn! (inside joke)
You pin pointed Fred and George's separation! The background to Fred and Angelina was flawless! I can really imagine Fred's separate motive.
This dose make me wonder about J Rowling's decision to kill Fred in The Battle; she can't have given him more lines and prominence though all the stories just to kill him for the inevitable breaking of our hearts. I do not believe she is that cynical. Yet, I still wonder...

Author's Response: Ellorah
The Fred/Angelina/George thing puzzled me, and this was my solution. I’m fairly sure that JKR did give Fred prominence in the knowledge that she’d eventually kill him. Not because she’s cynical, but because I think she knew she had to kill a Weasley in the battle, because the death of someone else really close to Harry would be the spur to the final act. Frankly, Percy and Charlie were safe, because not enough people care about them.

The Heart's Translation by noblefate

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Lily Evans hates James Potter; he's reckless, careless, hopeless. James Potter loves Lily Evans; she's feisty, forward, firm. Over their years at Hogwarts, both of them change, and their love eventually becomes the stuff of legend. This is the story of how that love started and how it touched the lives of everyone they knew.
Reviewer: turquoiseturkeyz Signed
Date: 06/14/12 Title: Chapter 1: And So It Begins

I liked the descriptions when you started off but somewhere on the train your details started rushing away in hast for the next event. It was fantastic, but please take your time. Love is all the more wonderful when you have to wait for it.

Author's Response: Thank you for the critique. I felt like it was descriptive overload at the start of the chapter, but I'll keep in mind what you said as I work on the rest of the story. ~ Megan