Penname: lily loves sirius black [Contact]
Real name:
Member Since: 04/23/12
Website:
Beta-reader:
Status: Member
Bio:
[Report This]
Reviews by lily loves sirius black
 

Cartoon Heart by Padfoot11333
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 4]

Summary:

Adrian didn't know how he'd fallen for her. He didn't want to.


And even though he could not think of leaving her, she acted, every moment, as if she could leave him without thinking twice.

Nominated for a 2013 Quicksilver Quill - Best Post/Hogwarts.



Categories: Other Pairing Genre: Warnings: Mild Profanity, Sexual Situations

Word count: 1114 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
09/27/12 Updated: 09/28/12


Reviewer: lily loves sirius black Signed
Date: 09/29/12 Title: Chapter 1: be a bright red rose and come bursting the concrete

I don't know...but I found it to be lacking in some aspects like her reactions to him,the ending wasn't too good also.....I think so u should rewrite this with a few more details because the storyline is but the description isn't.
I have read some of your stories and i think that you can do much better.

Author's Response: Is there a reason that you didn't like the ending? I think it was necessary to the story, even if it didn't turn out the way that you wanted. I'm also not sure why you think the storyline was better than the description. This piece was mostly description-based, and there really wasn't much of a storyline. I intentionally wrote it like that, so saying that you don't like the description is really quite a bit like saying you don't like the story. I'm glad you've read some of my other stories, but I'm at a bit of a loss to understand why you would review this one and not the ones you thoroughly enjoyed.

Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Against the Dying of the Light by starscribe 3rd-5th Years
A first war story. As the Order is plunged into a war for which they are unprepared...
Tom Riddle and the Cave of Living Waters by alittletiefling 6th-7th Years
What would happen if Tom Marvolo Riddle had been adopted by well-meaning squibs?...
Pensive by foolondahill17 1st-2nd Years
Or, seven times Severus Snape wanted and could not have Lily Evans. "The glass...
FEATURED
Whatever Happened to Saturday Night by Simply Being 3rd-5th Years
A short tale of the Marauder's friendship and its subsequent demise. Songfic...
Love is Like a Wrong Turn on a Cold Night by lucca4 6th-7th Years
Michael Corner muses on his short-lived relationship with Daphne Greengrass...
Maps by the opaleye Professors
Tell me, is the rose naked Or is that her only dress? -Pablo Neruda Four...
Pineapple in the Library by 1000timesingoldenink 1st-2nd Years
It's late on a Sunday evening, and Neville has a couple of questions...Why is...
CATEGORIES