My name is Geoff, and I'm too old-fashioned to have a Facebook page, so what you see here is what you get.
I came late enough to Harry Potter that I never had to wait for the next book to come out. Still, Harry isn't Bertie Wooster: he has but one real story to tell, and the day came when it had been told in full. It turns out, though, that hijacking the characters and settings, trying to recapture the elusive feel that made the originals so successful, is a lot more challenging and fun than I expected it to be.
I'm a complete amateur at this: my real job doesn't involve literature, publishing, or popular entertainment of any kind.
If you make it to the end of any of my stories, please consider leaving a review.
Summary: The McKenna's are back from a relaxing vacation in the Canary Islands. Eager to get back into their daily routine, Mrs. McKenna is shocked to discover that her knitting patterns are gone. Even more perplexing, there is a picture that does not belong to the family, and the people in the picture are moving.
I've no idea where this is going, but I shall follow and find out. Good on you for working with all original characters.
Author's Response: Thank you taking the time to read Chapter 1 and to write a review! You're actually the first person, who is not my mom, to review a piece of my creative writing. Please feel free to criticize any of my work so I can learn what I need to improve.
Samuel Radley is a wizard born without magic. Coming from a family with generations of witches and wizards, his brother Adrian has never really understood why Samuel has been left without, especially when there are others, with no magical blood at all, who somehow find themselves able to do magic. As he enters his fourth year at Hogwarts, it seems that the Ministry are finally starting to do something about this imbalance and Adrian couldn't be happier. All around him however, there is resistance to the new laws, and suddenly Adrian finds himself an outsider in his class and abandoned by his friends, when all he's ever done is love his family.
This is coolh5000 of Slytherin writing in the Great Hall chaptered challenge, for the Phoenix Rising prompt. I am pleased to say this story won in its section!
I am also really thrilled to say that Adrian Radley won the Chaptered QSQ for Best Original Character 2013! The story was also nominated in the Best General category.
Great start to a story with an excellent premise. The striking moment is that reaction when Theia sees the Muggle family: a shot of pure jealous hatred, from someone who might have thought she didn't have a jealous bone in her body. Dramatic emotion, yet it rings completely true. You didn't really even need to pursue it: by the end of that first paragraph ("How does it happen?") we already have all we need to know for now.
One criticism: you have a few viewpoint changes in this prologue, and I'm left wondering who the rest of the story is going to be about. Theia? Adrian? Or Samuel himself? I guess the next chapter will clear this up.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review :) I've had similar feedback about overdoing it a bit in the prologue so perhaps I need to go back and revise parts of it. This was always going to be Adrian's story, but I wanted to separate the prologue a bit and decided to make it more of a multi-pov to give the reader an introduction to all of the characters. I hope you'll continue reading! ~coolh5000
Summary: Growing up as a member of the Malfoy family, Valeria has always struggled to conform in an intimidating environment and to the strictest of demands. Until one fateful day when she finds herself completely cut off. Lost, adrift and facing destitution, she finds help from the unlikeliest of benefactors. The opportunity arises to build a new future for herself, and her life will take an unexpected turn...
Nice story - it has that moreish quality that marks good writing. You obviously have plans for where this story is going, but it's great that you aren't rushing it: it's been worth spending a few chapters with this character first.
Summary: The year is 1543, and the heir to the Malfoy estate, Lucius, encounters the young Lady Elizabeth Tudor in the grounds of Hatfield House. It is a meeting, he later discovers, of his mother's engineering, for it is of the utmost importance that he strikes up a friendship with the King's daughter. But the Lady Elizabeth has a powerful protector in her governess, and only the highest political machinations can overcome the will of Kat Champernowne.
In the ensuing Tudor power struggle, no one factored love into the equation, least of all Elizabeth.
Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling, but I think you know that by now.
This is Equinox Chick with her fourth entry for The Great Hall Cotillion.
I like it. I don't know whether you could get away with sending Elizabeth to Hogwarts, but if not, I'm sure you have something just as interesting planned for her. How long is this story going to be?
One quibble: the year is 1643? Surely you mean 1543?
Author's Response: AGHH! Yes, I do mean 1543 - thank you so much for pointing that out! I have all the dates on my timeline in front of me then muck up when it comes to the summary - hahahaha. Thank you so much for the review. I know you're an excellent historical writer so I hope the rest of the story passes muster. Hmm, Elizabeth at Hogwarts would be interesting, but, alas there's too much data for her being around during her teens to make it feasible. Okay, this story is for a challenge, so it has to be under 15K, so I'm working on around the 5 chapter mark. However, I'm becoming increasingly fascinated by the Tudors (which I hadn;t really looked at since school) so there's a strong chance that this will be the first part of a story about her.
Thank you so much for the review and for pointing out my ridiculous error!
Summary: The Wizarding World is in trouble; the werewolves are rebelling, the giants are becoming restless, and the newly elected minister is weak and easily manipulated.
Despite these problems, however, life goes on and Albus Potter is beginning his fifth year at Hogwarts.
If this short first chapter is anything to go by, this story is going to crackle along. I look forward to it.
Summary: The year is 1717. Marja de Draak receives word that her brother has gone missing and takes a fast ship to Cochin, determined to find him. Once there, she finds more danger than she ever anticipated: all along that coast, travelers have learned to fear the name of Joris Janszoon, a pirate who believes he cannot be killed. And N. Vikram, the man investigating her brother’s case, is determined to see justice done. Fate has brought them together; now what does it have in store for them?
Intriguing! This well-constructed opening chapter sets things up without wasting words or giving too much away. I'm looking out for the next installment.
Summary: A penniless thief, a carefree prankster, the school's golden boy, a rich player and a blue-blooded aristocrat.
For these five, it was never a question of just getting good marks, or trying to avoid detention. Everyone always told them that Hogwarts would be some of the best years of their lives, but nobody mentioned how difficult life could be, or what would happen to their friendship along the way. However, despite their struggles, they always remembered this- you'll never have friends like the ones you make when you're seventeen.
I was disappointed to get to the end of this and realize that it's only one chapter (so far). I like the way it touches on the Epilogue, but isn't tied to it, instead setting off in a direction and style of its own. The kids in this one are almost more reminiscent of those in The Casual Vacancy than Harry Potter, but that needn't be a bad thing if you can make it work. Interesting use of the multiple first-person POV - was it the upcoming plot that suggested that?