Summary: Embers in a cage made from bone
slowly growing cold
Albus needed her. She didn’t need him.
He was a shadow of who he used to be; there was no life in him.
She was the one who sucked the very soul out of him.
When all was said and done, nothing remained of either of them. They were human debris.
This was written for, inspired by, and generally blamed on Jamie (Acacia Carter). She’s an amazing author, and I hope I did the video, IKEA table, and her justice.
This is iMusic17 from the house of the snakes writing for the final round in Alex’s triathalon 2012.
Ellie this was incredible. Dark and twisted and ghastly and depressing and shocking and a million other things, yet somehow still something I enjoyed. The descriptions of Albus' eyes were so powerful, and I liked the fact you kept the identity of the girl ambiguous (though I can't deny I'd loved to have worked out who she is!)
I'm really not sure what to say, other than that you made what was really quite a disturbing plot into something beautiful and entrancing... Proud of you my fellow Slyth!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review, Fenella!
Wow. I'm so glad you liked it. It's probably one of the darkest pieces I wrote, and I'm so glad it didn't scare you off, lol. I love describing eyes for some reason, and I honestly don't have a name for the OC. I kind of felt it dulled what I was trying to say. That they were both 'nobodys', and she was just another face in the crowd, yeah? Thank you so much for the amazing review. (and 'she' can be whoever you want!)
Summary: It's the end of seventh year and James Potter has a lot on his mind about friendship, love and how to escape the Girls Dormitory.
I loved this.
Not too cliched, not too soppy, yet still romantic and touching.
I think the thing that makes this so powerful is James envisioning their future, the future we know never happened. Incredibly hard hitting, yet I liked the simplicity of your writing. You didn't say anything outright, you left it to the reader.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the lovely review! For a long time I had the image of James sneaking into Lily's room just to be near her, so I was really glad when the rest of the story fell into place
Annabel is having a bad day. Her sudden and unexpected meeting with a face from her past is unlikely to improve matters.
This was Northumbrian of Ravenclaw House writing for Round Three of the 2012 Character Triathlon. This is now a longer chaptered story.
Nominated for: Best Original Character (Chaptered) story (for the narrator, Annabel) and Best Next Generation Story - Quicksilver Quills 2013
I have to confess this actually made me cry. A someone who absolutely adores Strangers at Drakeshaugh, somehow the thought that James tore apart the two families is completely gutting.
James' realisation that Anna was in fact 'little Annie Charlton' genuinely made me gasp. It caught me completely off guard, I hadn't clicked on to that at all. In fact I promptly re-read this to try and see if I should have realised it earlier!
In terms of the actual content, I thought you handled Anna's heartbreak perfectly. Her conflicted state of mind was really human and natural. James, too, was perfect. Arrogant yet charming with Harry and Ginny's natures just glimpsed.
In order to console me, please post part two soon!
Thank you, Fenella.
I've had this idea in the back of my mind for quite some time. I've always resisted "true" next-gen, by which I mean stories where the Potter kids are old enough to fend for themselves. Strangers, to me doesn't count.
It's probably unfair to load all of the blame on James. Once I decided that neither Henry nor Annie would be magical (and until this story, I didn't let anyone know) I knew that when James and Al went to "that public school in Scotland" the families would invariably drift apart. There is one (tiny) clue to Anna's identity. "Mum" turns to her husband and says "Out, Mike."
I'm beginning to like James. He is, I hope charming. And I hope that Anna has managed to humble him a little. You'll see part 2 very soon, I hope.
Summary: Ginny let her temper get the better of her, and said something she shouldn't have to Romilda Vane, who works for Witch Weekly. It's going to be in the news, and now she has to admit it to Harry first - but its not a conversation she's looking forward to. Rated for the implied relationship between the characters, though both are over 18. Takes place 3 years after the DH battle, epilogue disregarded and Fred still alive.
I'm not usually a fan of anything that defies canon, however with this I'd have to make an exception.
I loved how much detail you went into with Ginny's life, without it feeling too exposition-y and overloading the reader. She was the Ginny we know from the books yet you still made her your own, and it really worked.
The relationship between Harry and Ginny was really intricately woven together, and entirely believable and human. I really felt you made their relationship come alive with the dynamic you gave them.
I thought Ginny's characterisation was interesting, particularly her attitude towards her family. The allusions to her and Harry's intimate relationship were cleverly done, and I liked the fact Ginny seemed to want to keep her family guessing as to how committed they were as a couple.
The only criticism I really have is that personally I felt it unnecessary to stray from canon as it didn't really effect the plot? I guess what I'm trying to say is that I could understand diverging from canon for artistic purposes and all that but I think making this canon wouldn't have negatively effected the story at all, and if I'm honest I can't quite see why you didn't. But that's just my opinion :)
Overall I really enjoyed it, it was well written and I felt you captured their relationship perfectly.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your thoughtful feedback! I am really glad you enjoyed it and thought I managed to bring a level of reality and believability into the characters and their relationship. As I've not written Harry and Ginny before, its very encouraging to know I didn't wreck them on my first attempt :). I understand what you said about the deviation from canon, too. Honestly, I agree; Fred's survival in no way affected the immediate plot and it would have worked just the same, par a few sentences, had I stuck completely to the books. The truth is that I always hate accepting Fred's death, even in the most vague stories and I wrote him to still be alive basically on autopilot and only realised when I'd finished that I had. In my mind, when I write potter fics, his death never happened, so I left it the way I'd first written it, even though I knew it might
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your thoughtful feedback! I am really glad you enjoyed it and thought I managed to bring a level of reality and believability into the characters and their relationship. As I've not written Harry and Ginny before, its very encouraging to know I didn't wreck them on my first attempt :). I understand what you said about the deviation from canon, too. Honestly, I agree; Fred's survival in no way affected the immediate plot and it would have worked just the same, par a few sentences, had I stuck completely to the books. The truth is that I always hate accepting Fred's death, even in the most vague stories and I wrote him to still be alive basically on autopilot and only realised when I'd finished that I had. In my mind, when I write potter fics, his death never happened, so I left it the way I'd first written it, even though I knew it might seem like a useless point to some people. Thanks again (and I'm sorry if this appears twice, since I have a feeling my laptop hiccuped...) Tatty
Summary: It has been nineteen days since the war ended. For everyone involved, it's time to move on and rebuild but can they after everything that has happened?
Wow, this chapter was my favourite yet.
I feel like I completely understand where both Hermione and her dad were coming from in their disagreement. I found the end few paragraphs of this to be incredibly powerful, and the depth of her dad's love and fear for her was really touching, and the last line made me cry. The capitalisation of 'Daddy's Little Girl' was particularly powerful, as it felt like a title she'd always had, but had now lost.
The scenes with Ron were also well handled, they felt like the characters we know yet still damaged.
I can't wait for an update, as truly this was incredibly emotive, and the style of your writing is very enthralling.
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing! Wow, thanks! Yeah, the trouble with this is that they are both right, but neither are going to cave so it's a real stalemate. I'm glad you liked the Ron scenes as well. Obviously they are going to be different people after everything they have been through. Update may take a while as I'm having computer trouble but the story isn't abandoned - don't panic!
Summary: As the Summer Holidays approach, it is time for Sports Day at James Potter's school.
Seeing a story from you always makes my day, and this did the job! I love how everything fits into your timeline, or 'one big story' as I think you put it on your author's page.
With regard to this, all I can say is wow. I think it can be all too easy to forget the extent to which Harry suffered as a child, and I love how you've managed to convey this in such a simple, concise manner without overdoing the emotion. When I saw the abuse warning I guessed that the story would include a flashback to Harry's own childhood as I couldn't quite see a way you could have needed such a warning for James.
A lovely piece, touching with just the right amount of brutal honesty. I hope this means you might be updating Strangers at Drakeshaugh soon!
Fenella, thanks for the review.
Every so often I make a mistake with my timeline, but the post-kids section is fairly well plotted out now and the one big story (made of lots of little stories) continues.
Harry himself reminded me of his youth. The flashback wasn’t originally part of the plan. But as I wrote, Harry started to get a bit maudlin, and I realised that this story wasn’t simply about James. I hope to update Strangers and H&P within the next couple of weeks.
Katie Bell fought hard to build a relationship with a difficult and reclusive Draco Malfoy, despite their dire past, but she felt like she was losing him more the closer they came to their wedding date. However, when Draco manages to strand himself far in the past with his newly-discovered Temporal Displacement Potion, Katie follows him back, only to find more than she bargained for.
She found the truth.
This is ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor of Ravenclaw, writing for the Ninth Round of the Gauntlet.
This is easily one of the weirdest things I've ever read - but somehow that isn't a criticism. For me it was more about their relationship than the bizarre time travelling, and as always your characterisation was dead on and believable. Draco and Katie's fractured relationship was so human, and the lengths Draco was willing to go to to 'fix' it were completely believable and flowed perfectly. I must admit I didn't entirely understand exactly what happened with the time jump and why, but I think that will be remedied after I re-read this, and that really isn't a criticism. Your ability to create such a believable story out of such a bizarre situation really should be commended. I'm probably not explaining myself very well but what I'm trying to say is that I actually really enjoyed this and that the weirdness worked!
Oh, Fenella, I will never cease to adore your reviews. :D
This story was weird - weird to write and weird to plot. I had a rough idea of how I wanted things to go down, but how to get there was at the tender mercy of my Gauntlet guide. I can't convey how many annoyed PMs I sent my guide because I was unhappy with being derailed yet again, but I sucked it up and here we are.
Draco and Katie are a ship that shouldn't work, but when you break down the nuts and bolts of who they are as people, they kinda do. I never really thought Katie resented Draco for the necklace thing, because that isn't who she is. I think Draco hated himself for the things the Dark Lord made him do than anyone who was or might've been hurt by his efforts. Overall, I think it's made him a more complex and real character.
I don't blame you for being confused by the plot. I even had to read it a couple times myself to make sure it made sense to ME. I really wanted to have a beta for that purpose, but mine flaked out on me, so it was freeballing from there. Erk. Anyway...
Thank you so much for your visit and ever-kind words. I look forward to your visits, even if I'm a dolt and don't respond quickly enough. *hugs*
Summary: When impulsive new Auror Alice Hamilton is partnered with the more serious and experienced Frank Longbottom, neither is quite sure what to expect. They have a history, after all, and a different way of approaching the job. Yet in a world where dark forces continue to threaten the safety and security of the magical community, they must work together in spite of their feelings--especially when it becomes clear that You-Know-Who is planning a major offensive that will threaten both their relationship and their lives.
I'm really enjoying this. I love how you haven't made Frank and Alice at all cliched, they're interesting and human and I'm looking forward to getting to know them better. I think it's interesting how Frank is intelligent and able to make the link between the goblins and the werewolves, but is not only uncertain of it's significance but also he seems unaware of his own intelligence, something that does remind me of Neville. I'm intrigued as to where you are going with this and can't wait for an update!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm so so glad they are not coming across as cliched...yet. ;) And I hope you enjoy where it goes as we get to know them more. Thank you so much for the lovely review! ~Gina :)
Summary: All Scorpius Malfoy had wanted on the Saturday before Halloween was to spend some time in Hogsmeade alone with his girlfriend, Lily Potter. But Fate appeared to have other plans. Not only is her annoying cousin Hugo Weasley tagging along, but in the aftermath of a violent storm, a body is uncovered.
Working with his boss, Head Auror Harry Potter, to discover the identity of the victim, and the truth of her death, Scorpius quickly learns that not all skeletons are buried underground.
This is a the sequel to High. It is not necessary to read that to understand this, but what the heck, you might just enjoy it!
Many, many thanks to Kara (Karaley Dargen) for not only beta'ing this story, but putting up with the tortuous search for a title.
Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling, but I think you know that.
Uncovered by Death won the 2013 QSQ for Best Chaptered Next Generation Story. Thank you very much.
This is seriously intriguing me, I have no idea who it could be! I like how you haven't made Cormac a stereotypical villain, he's complex and I really want to know who it is that planted the wand! (I'm starting to think it might not be a 'her' though... hmmm)
I hope you update soon and that Scorpius finally gets to spend some time with Lily haha!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review :) - I am so pleased you're finding this intriguing as I've been trying to not reveal too much. It's very hard writing a mystery when you know the answer - hahahahah. I should be updating soon as have two chapters written, but I do need to get cracking on chapter 12. Thanks again ~Carole~
I adored this chapter. Fast paced, but not so fast that I couldn't keep up with the goings on. I particularly liked the interactions between Harry and Scorpius and Harry and Tamara, though I did find it a bit odd that it hadn't occurred to her that a wizard wouldn't have needed a key to access her documents.
The ending was amazing, you built up the tension so well (and I can't wait to find out what Scorpius's revelation was!).
Author's Response: Thank you so much. My feeling with Tamara is that she's been without magic for so long that she's become complacent. She wouldn't have taken magical precautions, and also, her will had more or less slipped her mind because she made it in a hurry, and also didn't think it was about her money ... sort of.
You'll find out how Scorpius worked it out in the next chapter. :D Thank you again ~Carole~
Yay a sequel to High! I genuinely squeeled when I saw you'd posted this, and I can't say that excitement has subsided much.
I love the dynamics going on here between the characters, and it's nice to see Scorpius and Lily's relationship still going strong despite the distance between them.
I'm really, really intrigued as to who the body belongs to. The fact she's in Hogwarts robes only fuels that further, and I've spent the past few minutes ransacking my memory for a missing girl, unfortunately to no avail.
I can't wait for you to update, I'm desperate to know where this is leading and also to get my Scily fix!
Author's Response: Yay! First review! thank you very much; I always chew my nails until the first one's under the belt. Now I can relax.
Mwahahahahahahaha - the identity of the victim will become apparent at some stage. Oh, and I think Scorpius is waiting for his Lily fix, too - ha ha. Poor boy ;p
,br> Thanks again. ~Carole~
There's so much I loved about this, the intricacy with which you've established Katie as a character in just one chapter is astonishing, I feel like I know her already even though there are still so many unknowns regarding the whole predicament she's in. Her denial of being an alcoholic was particularly profound, as it really is reflective of the state of mind many alcoholics get them selves into, where they've persuaded themselves but not anyone else that they don't depend on alcohol.
Oliver is fascinating, and I can't wait to know more about how on earth he ended up as a bartender in the Hog's Head, and I thought the fact that he couldn't help but be attracted to Katie even in her dishevelled state to be a particularly interesting insight into his character.
I'm really looking forward to reading more of this,
Author's Response: Fenella! THANK YOU for the review! :D
I am so glad you enjoyed this. To be honest, I really think this was a shaky start, and it was only thanks to Gina, my first beta, that it straightened out enough to be readable, at least. And I am really happy that you think Katie's characterisation was good so far -- she is not an easy character to relate to and even less an easy character to translate onto the page, so yay to you liking her! :)
And yayayayay to you liking Oliver! Not gonna lie, if I wasn't already married to Louis (not to mention countless other fictional men, lol), I would so marry him, too. But maybe that's just me XD You will find out why Oliver is a barman in the next chapter, which I will post soon. You'll also find out more about Oliver's feelings for Katie, because they're not new at all. :P
Thank youuuuuuu, Fenella, for the lovely review! I hope to see you on the next chapter.
Even though I had my suspicions as to where this was leading, the Katie/Leanne relationship and it's eventual tragedy was still devastatingly powerful, particularly Katie's admission that she wished they'd had more time together. I thought the manner in which Leanne's death came about was interesting, as it's something that very nearly happened in DH and like the Trio, Katie had no idea about the taboo.
Oliver... oh my gosh I love him. I mean I've always loved him, but i feel like you've captured his spirit perfectly. His intensity and insecurities came across wonderfully, and his determination to coax the truth out of Katie seemed really in character.
I found the last paragraph particularly powerful, 'after kicking out the closest person on earth she had to a friend'... she's pushing him away and I like how you've had her acknowledge that, yet continue to wallow in her despair.
Can't wait for an update!
Author's Response: Hello again! :D
I don't think I intended for there to be major shock factor in anything that really happened -- so I'm glad you thought the backstory about Katie and Leanne's death was still powerful. I'm not sure if you've read Flicker and Fail, which is kind of a prequel to this story and details a lot more about Katie and Leanne's relationship. Not that I'm self-pimping or anything XD (It's actually not as strong as some of my other stuff, so you don't have to read it or anything, lol.) And I'm hoping the backstory wasn't an infodump or anything.
Yayayay, you like Oliver! :D I do love him, not gonna lie. I'm so glad you do, too, and yay to you liking the last line as well. That one didn't come easy for me.
Thank youuuuu for the lovely review! I'm so glad you're enjoying the story so far, and I hope to see you on the next chapter. :)
Is your intention to leave me a sobbing wreck?! you succeeded!
I didn't see that end coming at all! Breaking my heart :( They have to be together, and whilst I hope that Katie will be able to accept his love now that she's been punished, at the same time I'm worried she'll push him away even further :(
Sorry for such a rambling review, but the problem is you've gotten me so emotionally attached to these characters that I just can't let them go! Sequel pretty please?
Sorry for not being very coherent. Or constructive for that matter, but I loved this story a huge amount and your ability to create characters we care about such a huge amount in such a short amount of time is incredible. Oh and I'm now quite significantly in love with Oliver...
Author's Response: Awwww, Fenella, I'm sorry I made you cry! (Not really, lol.) No, honestly, I'm flattered you enjoyed this story so much, even if it maybe didn't go the way you wanted. I purposely left the ending unresolved because I think there's a lot more to their story to come, but in ways, Katie did come full circle and get over certain issues.
Haha, I'm so emotionally attached to them both as well! I really do want to write a sequel as well as a couple of companion pieces (I was thinking of writing Colin/Lisa at the very least), although I'm not sure how much of that I'll be able to write given exams and stuff :( We'll see. I definitely do want to write more OliKatie, that's for sure. I'm really glad you enjoyed the story, because it was fun to write (*coughespeciallythesmutcough*) and thank you for all the lovely reviews!
I feel kind of like a stalker, but what the heck I'm gonna review again regardless!
I read in your response to your previous review that you didn't feel like this was a particularly strong chapter, but I'd have to disagree with you! I thought it was subtle in how you further developed Katie and Oliver as characters, particularly in revealing how Oliver ended up in the Hog's Head. It doesn't seem contrived, in fact it seems perfectly logical that Oliver would have simply walked out on his dream in pursuit of something bigger, something right. I like how this shows how much he's grown since we saw him in the early books, he used to be so focussed on winning that he failed to see that anything else was more important (for instance when he told McGonagall that he didn't care if Harry's broom was cursed as long as they still won in PoA), yet here he clearly has realised that the world doesn't revolve quidditch. I guess what I'm trying to say in a very rambling way is that you've taken what we know of Oliver as a boy and matured him into a man.
I loved Katie's visit to the church, I found it incredibly emotive, and as religion isn't a topic often dealt with in HP fanfic, and I like how you didn't portray it as some illogical muggle fad, but instead as something that drew Katie in as a means to deal with her grief.
Oooh and the last line was amazing, I'm someone who firmly believes that the first and biggest step to getting over depression is realising that it can and will be okay again, so I found Katie's epiphany perfectly fitting regarding her state of mind.
Love it, and I'm also loving how steadily you're updating!
Author's Response: Nooooo, you're not a stalker! I thrive on reviews, so never feel like you're stalkering or doing anything wrong by reviewing because EVERY author loves them :D
Yaaaaaay to you liking this chapter in spite of my issues with it. I think the problem I had was that it was a bit of a filler chapter -- nothing really happened -- but I also know that I needed a filler, too, because I needed to establish a few more plot strands. I am so glad you liked how I've developed Katie and Oliver's relationship. I do love them as a pair; however, I also think that they both have their issues that need resolving, at least a little, before one of them makes a proper move. Katie, of course, is still half-convinced Leanne is still there, and Oliver is struggling with feelings he thought were long since buried at Hogwarts, while at the same time not wanting to take advantage of Katie (understandably given how vulnerable she is).
For some reason, I've always thought Oliver would make a hot barman (Jess agrees with me on that XD) and on a more serious note, I do think there would have been issues with Quidditch teams during the war especially if there are Muggleborns on the teams (and there are bound to be some, at least). He was focused on winning in Hogwarts, but yes, he's obviously come to terms with the fact that the world certainly doesn't revolve around Quidditch. Yaaaaaaaaay to Oliver maturing as a man, hehehehehe. He is in his twenties now, so of course he's not going to stay completely maniacal forever (though you do see his more argumentative side sometimes later on).
Okay, I'll be honest -- the main reason Katie visits a church is actually because I had to go to Christmas Mass with my school (I'm not Catholic, though -- I'm Muslim, ha), and I found it really interesting, especially the sense of unity that I could see in the church amongst those who took Communion and everything. Soo that was a little... not self-insertion, as such, but just a bit of real life in my story because I was totally stuck at that point. Katie isn't particularly religious -- she was more jealous of how united everyone was in the church as well as the couple she could see there.
I'm so glad you liked the last line! I think these chapters are pretty short (there are three more to go, by the way), but I also thought there were natural endings to some chapters so it made sense to break them up so. The whole story is about 18k and is already written, which is why I'm updating so quickly! :) I'll probably have it all posted within the next week. Hold on tight, though -- you're in for a bumpy ride, hehe. There are a few more plot twists to come; this is just calm before the storm, if you will. :D
Thank you again for the lovely, thoughtful review. Come June, I will so be nominating you for the Best Reviewer fQSQ, Fenella, because I get warm and fuzzy every time I read a review from you, so thank you very much! :)
Summary: Albus is a rebel without a cause. Rose is the one he left behind for a revolution. When everything is crashing down around them, will free-thinking be worth the cost? Who will end up paying the price?
*Title is taken from 'A Little Fall of Rain' from Les Misérables.
This fic is for (and was betaed by) Soraya, the captain of this ship. Written for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion.
I'm a little bit lost for words.
I like how this wasn't about the revolution, not really. It was about love and bravery.
Harry's piece was heartbreaking, truly truly heartbreaking, and his anger at the Aurors who had defied orders and killed Albus was extremely powerful. But it was the last line that caught me off guard, that dealt the final blow in my attempt to hold off tears. I didn't see that coming at all, in fact I re-read the entire story to see if I'd failed to pick up on something. Wow, just wow.
Author's Response: Fenella <333333
Thank you so much for the amazing review. I'm so glad you caught on the major themes (I know I was being a bit cryptic). And Harry ... I felt so bad for him and for everything that happened.
The last line. I wasn't sure what people were going to make of that. The only hint I really gave to the fact that Rose lived was this: "The wound is on her side, thank Merlin, not her stomach, but something seems off. The rain couldn’t dilute the blood enough for there to be this much, could it?" I'm so glad you liked it; I really wasn't sure about this. Just, thank you. <333333
Summary: “I’ve always been chubby. Admit it.”
“You’ve never been skinny, Lily, no. So what?”
“So I don’t like it! So I want to actually look like I’m related to everyone else and not be the bloody odd one out. Is that so bad, that I want to be -- beautiful? Really?”
On the day of Teddy and Victoire's wedding, Lily Luna Potter faces some home truths.
This is babewithbrains of Ravenclaw writing for the 2013 Great Hall Valentine's Day Cotillion.
This story has been nominated for a 2013 Quicksilver Quill Award: Best Next Generation. Thank you!
Aww, this was really touching. You dealt with such a sensitive issue in a way that made it seem completely human, and I could easily understand why she was doing it, to me it made perfect sense. Her insecurities were so well developed in such a short amount of time, especially her belief that whilst no one other than Roxy ever commented on her weight they were all thinking it. I found that interesting because we so often are convinced people are thinking about us when they probably aren't. Louis... was perfect. I love your Louis, I love how he sees straight through her even though she thinks he doesn't understand.
I like how this acts as a kind of prequel to your other stories, and it was lovely to see their relationship developing and getting an insight not only into Lily's insecurities regarding her weight but also towards her blossoming feelings towards Louis. I'm going to have to start shipping them soon!
Really I have no idea why you're unsure about this, I thought it was lovely, understated and as always your characterisation was dead on.
Author's Response: Fenellaaaa! Yayay, are you going to review everything I write or something? Because I'm definitely not going to stop you, lol -- thank you so much for reviewing this so quickly! :D
I'm glad you liked the way I dealt with the issue of bulimia. It certainly isn't something I'd write about lightly, and it means so much to me that you could see her reasons behind doing what she did and her insecurities about her weight.
I am so happy that you like Louis! :D I do love him. He's kind of my husband, lol. I think that's part of Lily's attraction to him -- the fact that he can see straight through her and can understand her is definitely something she admires about him and is what makes her slowly fall in love with him.
This is very much a prequel of my other stories (I seem to have written them backwards, ha -- I started off with Glass, then The Highway of Regret and then Broken Glass and now this story). I didn't want it to read like I needed you to have read the others to understand this one, if that makes sense -- I want each story to work in its own right, which is why my beta hasn't read the other Loulily stories, as far as I know. On another note, yayayayayay, I am so glad you're shipping Loulily! :D I've already converted Ellie, so welcome aboard the ship, hehe.
I'm really flattered that you enjoyed this so much, Fenella! Honestly, you are one of my favouritest reviewers ever. I really appreciate it. :) *heart*
Summary: You promised yourself you'd never hurt her, but there are times when you wonder if, by protecting her, you are just breaking her.
I really, really enjoyed this. I'm not sure how to convey my emotion without sounding like a slightly hyper two year old, so I'll settle for AMAZING.
The characterisation and development you managed in this was astounding. Considering it's a one shot, I feel like I know both Teddy and Lily perfectly. Nothing Teddy did surprised me, because you developed him so well from the cautious ten year old boy to the thirty two year old man.
Lily... perfect. Exactly how I imagine her to be, chatty and confident on the surface but more complex underneath. The snapshots were of perfect length, enough to deeply explore the different stages of their relationship, but not so long that it felt laboured. The second person narrative was interesting too, as it allowed you to explore Teddy's character more deeply without getting bogged down in his noble/self-sacrificing nature.
Oh and the fact you had Harry be the one to tell Lily to 'be proactive' was amazing, as it totally fits with his character and how supportive he was of Remus and Tonks, and of how many relationships (including his own) suffered because of people's inability to be proactive and act on their feelings.
The comparisons you drew between Teddy/Lily and Remus/Tonks were amazing, and I may actually have to start shipping Teddy/Lily after reading this. In case you hadn't gathered by now, I love it. I think some stories change how you look at certain characters and this is definitely one of them, as I've previously been a firm advocate of Teddy/Victoire.
On that note, I like how you didn't brush over the Teddy/Victoire relationship, and simply had it as a stage Teddy had to go through to develop and learn, much like Ron with Lavender.
I think I may have to add this to my favourites...
Author's Response: Hey Fenella! Your review has left me with many warm tinglies! Eep, I am so excited when I am able to convince people of a pairing they wouldn't ordinarily ship, so I'm glad it worked :) Thank you so much for all your lovely comments, they really made me happy :) Maple
Summary: The year is 1543, and the heir to the Malfoy estate, Lucius, encounters the young Lady Elizabeth Tudor in the grounds of Hatfield House. It is a meeting, he later discovers, of his mother's engineering, for it is of the utmost importance that he strikes up a friendship with the King's daughter. But the Lady Elizabeth has a powerful protector in her governess, and only the highest political machinations can overcome the will of Kat Champernowne.
In the ensuing Tudor power struggle, no one factored love into the equation, least of all Elizabeth.
Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling, but I think you know that by now.
This is Equinox Chick with her fourth entry for The Great Hall Cotillion.
Woah. I loved this story (and how quick you've been updating), it was such a fascinating coupling and I loved how much history was interwoven with the plot. But what I really, really loved was the curveball at the end. I did not see that coming at all! Actually, the thought did cross my mind when she named him Arthur but I was still caught completely off guard when all was revealed! Amazing. Sorry for the rubbish review but I'm still in shock! Oh how I'd love this to become canon!
Author's Response: Thank you, Fenella. I updated quickly because I had it all written , plus it was for the Cotillion, so I needed it all posted before 1st March. I have to admit that I'm pleased the way this turned out. I'd had the idea before Christmas, but you know what it's like, most ideas never work or don;t turn out the way you think they will. This did deviate from the original idea as I discovered a lot more of the facts rather than relying on the film 'Elizabeth' but the end scene with Lucius was the first thing I thought of.
Thanks again for reviewing ~Carole~
Summary: It's the longest start but the end's not too far away... It took Ron and Hermione years to finally get together but after just eighteen months everything is starting to crumble around them.
I found this a really tough story to read, not because it wasn't written well, but actually the polar opposite: it was written too well. It was too believable that Ron and Hermione would get themselves into this situation, and that's what made it so heartbreaking and frustrating. Your characterisation of them both was dead on, and this is one of the few times I've felt Ron's true spirit has been captured by someone other than JK, so many others get him so totally wrong yet you haven't, you've shown insight into his faults whilst still understanding the positive aspects of his character and not making him into the dim cliche that it can be so easy to. I like how you kept to canon, whilst still deeply exploring the fractures in their relationship, and not glossing over the fact that they do rub each other up the wrong way; always have done and always will do. I think this is honestly the best Ron/Hermione fic I've ever read, as it's almost painful in it's brutal honesty about their characters and how life and relationships aren't perfect, yet this is what makes it so good. For me, the ending was perfect, as you had them acknowledge the fact they have some major hurdles to overcome, but still restoring that hope that they will do so. The line: "I know. I'm not trying to fix everything... I'm -- I'm promising that I won't ever stop trying to." really captures this for me, and perfectly encompasses their relationship. Also, your inner monologue of Hermione's thoughts after Ron's (second) proposal so perfectly captured the essence of her need for logic and reason, whilst showing how she is still capable of emotion and how she's can overcome this: 'This was a decision that took deep thought and careful consideration. It needed time and logical reflection. Pro and con lists. Serious internal debate. An objective plan for the future. Research. Eight hours sleep and a healthy breakfast. A clear head.'
I don't really know what else to say other than that, truly, you should be really proud of what you've achieved as not many people are capable of creating such a painfully believable story, and even fewer can truly understand the Ron/Hermione dynamic. Thank you for a wonderful read.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! Ron is my favourite character in the series and I love him as much for his flaws as his strengths so it really means a lot for you to compliment my characterisation. Same with his relationship with Hermione. Everything in canon shows that they are going to have these moments when they get caught up in drama, but deep down they mean the world to each other. Fairytale, ride-off-into-the-sunset romances may happen, but this isn't one of them. But, like you said, that is what makes these two so much fun to write/read. Anyway, thank you so much for the lovely review! It totally made my day. Hope you enjoy the last couple of chapters :)