Very well crafted. I appreciate the balance of nostalgia, sadness, positivity, and celebration.
You have a gift for insightful dialogue that doesn't bog down in text: conversations flow quickly and reveal the characters' tone nicely.
Author's Response: Thank you very much. I';m glad you appreciate this little snapshot of their lives :D ~ Carole~
I enjoyed the convoluted storyline...working back to the beginning. Perhaps you might consider another A/S installment highlighting the events surrounding Al's magical revelation and Sophia's interactions with the Potters?
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! I'm not sure I'll write more of Al/Sophia's story - the main gist of their revelation is that when they both wake up one morning, Al realizes he loves her and decides to tell her. Sophia responds with "okay, cool, you're a wizard. What do you want for breakfast?" And then Al proposes he's so happy. I'm glad you liked it. :)
This is a delightfully playful and well-constructed backstory to the Drakeshaugh saga. Thank you for developing another Harry/Ginny narrative full of oddments and tweeks!!!!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. More Harry/Ginny soon. -N-
The story was well-plotted and nicely written. I appreciate the short, succinct paragraphs, informative dialogue, and progressive action.
I look forward to more of your work.
Author's Response: Thanks, now that I’ve written both a Bobbie-centred and a Lavender-centred M.I.T. story I really must write a Susan-centred one. However, next will be Strangers. -N-
So much information and wonderful action! This is a very nice addition to the post-Battle library. Good job!11
Plot setting aside, the story became much more interesting when the dialogue was injected into the narrative.
Be very cautious as you proceed: the temptation to simply supply information rather than develop interaction between characters is great. Choose your words wisely, both spoken and descriptive. A varied vocabulary will strengthen the reader's resolve to look for your story regularly. While your premise of a hate-to-love (lust?) relationshio between Draco and Hermione is not new, you have an opportunity to bring an unique spin to the 'ship.
Author's Response: Thank you for this awesome feedback! I agree about the dialogue vs narrative. For the purpose of an intro, narrative is what I went with. Hopefully you'll enjoy the unique spin I have planned for this pair.
Thisis DELIGHTFULLY fresh and spot on! Thank you for giving us a little backstory on Ginny and Harry and showing us the precious relationship between mother and daughter.
Author's Response: Thank you. A mother/daughter moment was something of a risk for me, as I'm neither a mother nor a daughter, I'm glad you liked it. -N-
A very nicely crafted introductory chapter. You present the reader with a bit of mystery: WHY did Harry buy the Muggle house? WHAT is the significance of waiting the 4 !/2 years and WHERE had Harry been living in the interim? Will the story reveal the reasons for Harry's avoidance of #12 Grimmauld Place? Is the interaction between House Elf and Master become the foundation for the rest of the story?
I look forward to reading your installments. Good luck!
Great job...keep going!!!!!
Now that you have provided sufficiently long paragraphs in narrative form, please focus more on dialogue and interaction. This is an interesting storyline.