Summary: The year is 2017. Despite budget problems, NASA and ESA have spent billions on the design and construction of a new spacecraft, entirely in secret. Why? It employs a form of propulsion that could make all others completely obsolete, a form of propulsion as secret as the project itself: Apparition. Hermione Weasley and Cho Chang have been chosen for the test flight, and the first artificially enhanced Apparition is about to be attempted.
As interesting a concept this is for a story, the terminology and technical aspects are overbearing. Sorry...this is just not going to fly (no pun intended) and the length of time since your last submission is proof.
Summary: So it's a Fred and a George who've bowled her over in the corridor of this train. Angelina and the Twins in six acts.
This is lovely: a nice balance of interaction, intrigue, and background. Readers new to HP would not catch the references from the books, which makes this story very special to those who have become attached to the characters from the early years. Great job.
Author's Response: Hi, baby54boomer!
Thank you so much. I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
Thanks for reading and for the review!
That's what Colin's pictures do to you - they make strange folks out of the people you know.
Colin has an eye for detail. So does Dennis.
This is a wonderful piece; thoughtful, revealing, and artfully constructed. The Colin we love is given dimension and life. We can see his raised eyebrows and exuberent smile as he waits to snap another photo. His passion for "capturing the moment" fairly radiates from the page. Dennis's memories touch our hearts.
Author's Response: Hello there!
Wow, what a lovely review! I'm sorry for taking so long to respond. The Creeveys are such a sad story, even sadder because we hear nothing about them after the final battle. I'm so glad you found Colin a rounded, realistic character full of 'dimension and life'. He certainly is exuberant! Such a contrast to Dennis. Thank you so much for this lovely review again!
Summary: As N.E.W.T.s quickly approach, Lily Evans struggles with her once-perfect boggart spell, while James Potter cannot seem to master the Patronus Charm. A strange journey through a long-lost room within the castle guides the two Heads through their troubles, leading them to an unexpected end where they find much more than the ability to master their magic.
This is Gmariam of Ravenclaw writing for the Great Hall Cotillion Challenge.
Great story...I hope you can maintain the tight prose and descriptive narrative throughout.
Author's Response: Thank you very much! I hope I can too. I have a word limit so it will have to be tight, lol. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, I really appreciate it! ~Gina :)
Summary: Lucy Weasley is so damn tired of being normal. She wants to stand out. She wants to be full. More than anything, she wants to lose weight. And she does. She gets so thin that she begins to disintegrate.
Scorpius Malfoy has watched Lucy fall apart for the past year. He wants, more than anything, to help her get well. Much like Lucy, he feels like he hasn't done anything worth remembering. This, he thinks, could be his chance.
I am Padfoot11333 of Hufflepuff writing for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion.Three times nominated for a 2013 Quicksilver Quill - Best Non-Canon Romance, Best Dark/Angst, and Best Next-Gen. Thank you everyone!
Self-acceptance and the need to be loved for self; is this what you are wanting the reader to glean from Lucy's experience?
In which Miss Johnson meets an old friend.
This is Northumbrian of Ravenclaw writing for the 2013 Great Hall Valentine's Day Cotillion.
Very nice. I appreciate the backstory and intertwined personal info on Angelina and how George is involved. Good job.
Author's Response: Thanks. I've been thinking about this one for some time. George has been involved with Angelina for years, without ever being involved with her. -N-
Summary: It's the longest start but the end's not too far away... It took Ron and Hermione years to finally get together but after just eighteen months everything is starting to crumble around them.
Hashing out the age-old arguments of "you don't unerstand" and "when have I ever" can seem endless. Thank you for breaking the loop and moving Hermione to action. PLEASE do not send her to Patrick: provide Hermione with a neutral landing place where she can think/postulate/decide. You appear to have created an obstenate Ron and a forgiving Hermione; now open her eyes to the reality of their doomed romantic relationship and move her along pragmatically, with closure and a purpose!
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing! This story is kind of all about breaking the loop of their old arguments and the two of them growing up because of that. I know what you mean about the Hermione going to Patrick idea and I promise this won't be that type of fic. Anyway, I hope you enjoy what is to come!
Interesting turn of events.
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing! Haha, yeah, interesting would probably be the word to use here.
Excellent reveal! Thank you for quickly addressing Patrick's self-absorbed hypocrisy. No reason to drag out Ron's concerns/apparent jealousies and leave the reader conflicted.
The narrative is tightly constructed and the interaction pleasingly quick. I look forward to the next installment. Will we find Ron wallowing in a Firewhiskey stupor? Will he surprise us all and end up at Hermione's parents'? Does he demonstrate a yet-unseen maturity and return to Grimmald Place? Please do not have him commit an act of childish stupidity...give us a positively surprising resolution and a come-full-circle dialogue between Ron and Hermione that will help them start anew.
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing! I'm really happy that you liked this chapter! There will be no 'childish stupidity' (I hope anyway) with Ron getting drunk and having a fling or something like that. I've seen it in a lot of stories and I don't think he would make the Lavender mistake twice personally. Obviously I can't say what will happen but I hope you enjoy it :)
Summary: On the night of her oldest brother's wedding, Lily Luna Potter is nursing a bruised heart. When she is charmed by the strange, handsome Scorpius Malfoy, she makes a mistake that will change her life..
I hope that future postings are in multiple chapters. The heightened conflict becomes tiresome when the reader is left without resolve too many times.
So Frank and Lily have history?? Perhaps a bit more infomation, please? And how does Scorpius play into Lily's life...is he a true foil to Frank or will he court Lily into a lasting relationship?
Author's Response: Thank you for the honest review. I understand what you're saying, as material length is always something I debate over in my head. I think normally I err on the side of shorter attention spans (like my own), but I suppose I didn't consider your point, so it's definitely noted. I will go into further detail of Frank and Lily's history, and Scorpius' role in Lily's life will also become pretty evident.
Thanks for reviewing.
Summary: Healer Hugo Weasley is forced to relive a rather painful part of his past when a patient turns out to be the girl he has always loved.
This is Ginny Weasley Potter of Hufflepuff House, writing for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion.
Okay, I get the "Hugo loves Annie, Annie loves Grey" conundrum. Enough said.
As for Annie's present injuries...in light of Grey's abusive history with her, I surmise the Muggle car accident is a ruse...more likely Grey caused the mishap himself. Perhaps Hugo has the same thoughts? And Annie's "condition"...my first jump was that Annie is pregnant; followed by the "accident" to terminate said pregnancy by a very jealous Grey. Would not all of these possibilities give Hugo more incentive to deck Grey like he did?
Good luck with the classes!
Author's Response: Well, to be honest, Annie is probably the most annoying OC I've ever written. I get irritated with people who sacrifice their self-respect, and I've seen it happen so much, it's probably come out of me in the form of a fic, ha! And yes, you're right. Annie wasn't knocked down by a 'Muggle car'. She was abused again. And Hugo knows this, which is why he's angry at the beginning. And this is also why Hugo is specifically called to treat Annie. Grey is aware that any other Healer could report him, but Hugo might not. Hmm. He's mostly wrong. I'm guessing Hugo would report this anyway.
And the 'condition'. Ha! Remember how I said this is last-minute and unbetaed? That's what's attributed to the 'condition'. :p Okay, no, Annie isn't pregnant. Not with Hugo's kid, even if she is (ten years' leap, remember?) In the original plot, Annie was supposed to die. She wouldn't wake up when Hugo tried to awaken her, and then after a lot of complicated medical stuff, she'd die. Her comatose 'condition' is what Hugo is thinking of over there I started writing that part, but it was too late in the night (or early in the morning, if you will -- about 4:00 AM) so I decided to cut it off by just letting her wake up, but having Hugo hit Grey anyway, because this is his chance, hehe. Hugo just took out all his anger on Grey. :p
Oh, classes are going fine, thank you for the review! :)
Summary: The wizarding world picks up its pieces after the war and apart from the inevitable grief from the loss all around, everything seems to be peaceful. However, little do Harry, Ron and Hermione know that this is just the calm before the storm, because there is something else that they have to come face-to-face with: life.
Auror training. Death Eater chases. Hogwarts. Relationship hurdles. Even without Voldemort around, Harry, Ron and Hermione may just have to come to terms with the fact that life can never be normal for them.
So many of these grief-and-moving-on stories leave the readers fatigued in the heavy psycho drama. I hope that you are able to breech the normal platitudes and create a narrative of hope and positivity that is rooted in the understanding that death/grief do not have to consume the living.
Author's Response: Oh, well, honestly, I'm not a fan of writing grief. I've had enough of it to last me a lifetime, even without having to write fanfiction about how bad it can be, so no, this story is a lot more than just how they slowly overcome their grief for Fred. It's novel-length, and I have the girls going to Hogwarts, the boys training as Aurors, and... well, you get what happens, don't you? The funeral was just a way to begin the story. I want to show Harry and Ginny's, and Ron and Hermione's relationships develop, and this was a good place to start. Thank you for reviewing, and hope your doubts are cleared! :)
Summary: Hermione was his daughter and, therefore, was as perfect as a ten year old could be in his eyes. Sometimes the rest of the world didn't agree though.
You've constructed a very thoughtful, tender story of Hermione's relationship with her dad centered around the emerging magic we've all come to love about her. I wish you would have taken the story further, providing the conclusive meeting with Professor McGonigal and subsequent resolve to Hermione's quest to know "why." That being said, this brief look into Hermione's heart-wrenching pre-Hogwarts days stands alone as a reminder that no one is without personal doubt on the cusp of potential greatness! Good job.
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing! Yeah, the story would have had much more fulfilling ending if there was something like that, haha. I might write something along those lines in the future though, to put poor little Hermione out of her misery. But yeah, thanks again for reviewing :)
Summary: Molly wants to throw a party, but Arthur doesn't feel like celebrating.
So many different storylines you could persue from this narrative...perhaps you won't mind if someone else picks them up and develops them in future???
Actually, this is a very nice sketch, revealing heart-felt emotions in various stages of healing. Good job to you!
On the day that Teddy Lupin begins his new life with Victoire Weasley, his bride, Lily Potter's heart breaks.
This story was submitted for the Milestone Celebrations competition and was voted into 1st Place. Thank you so much for your support!
This story has also been nominated for a 2013 Quicksilver Quill Award: Best Next Generation Story.
Sentimentally sweet. Observant. Complete. I would have changed one thing: the final kiss between Teddy and Lily. He should have kissed her cheek, maintaining his position as godfather and new husband to Victoire. The kiss on the lips was inappropriate.
I think we've all had that crush that would never happen, and sometimes we're the last ones to know that they'll never happen. It's not difficult to draw inspiration for this kind of scenario. And I think Lily deserved closure in this, but so did Teddy.
As for the kiss, I had it as a cheek kiss in the first draft, but I changed it for a specific reason. Teddy knows what it's like to be in love with someone who loves you back, and he knows the difference between 'just a kiss' and a 'real' kiss. The former is what it is, and the latter is something special; he needed to show her that no matter how much she loved him romantically, he just didn't and never would. I tried to convey that in the narrative, but maybe I should go back and poke it a bit and clarify that. Maybe it was inappropriate, but in the end, it was effective. Lily was the one who broke it off because she understood that. Teddy will probably tell Victoire about this one day, but only when he is sure that Lily has healed and moved on. At that moment, it wasn't his secret to tell.
Anyway, thanks as usual for the visit and the review. :D
Summary: The Hogwarts teachers are facing the first school year after the Battle of Hogwarts. How can they help the students, and the whole community, heal? What will it take to feel as if the world is back to normal?
Thank you for composing this piece and reminding us that we must work through paralyzing grief/sorrow/pain; accept what we cannot change and make better that which remains.
Author's Response: Our better nature is to seek happiness and not wallow in ceaseless suffering, but sometimes it takes a specific effort to move in that direction. As Patricia said at St. Stephen's Church, "Act as if..."
Summary: 31st October, 2001. Hermione, at the end of an average day at work, remembers a not-so-average day she had ten years ago that changed her life in every way. Trio friendship fic.
This is a delightful read, capturing the Trio's quirky inter-relationship just right. The dialogue is tight without being stilted and the humor is spot-on. Thank you for keeping Harry and Ron clueless and Hermione cautiously sentimental. You tied their first and present Halloweens together nicely.
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing! I'm really glad that you think I got the trio right in this. They are my favourite part of the books and it's fun playing with them like this. Part of me thinks they will never grow out of being clueless and sentimental.
Summary: Harry and Ginny visit Gringotts, and find a priceless treasure.
Wonderful storyline, bringing Harry and Ginny to Gringott's. I had never considered the restoration of magical portraits before, nor the possibility of Harry owning one of his grandparents. You have once again crafted a fun, thoughtful, and imaginative narrative that honors the Potter legacy while intertwining whimsy and sentimenality.
Thanks for the review.
The portrait made its first appearance in “The Badly Fitting Coat” and Harry’s grandparents will reappear occasionally. This is one of the fluffiest things I’ve written, I think.
Summary: Fifteen years after the Battle, Ron and Hermione reminisce.
Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling, but I hope she'd like this.
This story was inspired by a reminder from halfaslug on tumblr - thank you. I dedicate this to her, and Lori (Weasley Mom) because they love Romione so much. (Well, what's not to love?)
Very well crafted. I appreciate the balance of nostalgia, sadness, positivity, and celebration.
You have a gift for insightful dialogue that doesn't bog down in text: conversations flow quickly and reveal the characters' tone nicely.
Author's Response: Thank you very much. I';m glad you appreciate this little snapshot of their lives :D ~ Carole~
Summary: Albus remembered her, through everything that happened. And he just wanted to go back to where it all began, where everything was fine.
I enjoyed the convoluted storyline...working back to the beginning. Perhaps you might consider another A/S installment highlighting the events surrounding Al's magical revelation and Sophia's interactions with the Potters?
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! I'm not sure I'll write more of Al/Sophia's story - the main gist of their revelation is that when they both wake up one morning, Al realizes he loves her and decides to tell her. Sophia responds with "okay, cool, you're a wizard. What do you want for breakfast?" And then Al proposes he's so happy. I'm glad you liked it. :)