Another great one-shot.
I can see why you chose Nott, character don't come much more "Minor" than him. As he was hardly mentioned AT ALL in the books.
I really liked the way you have developed the character. Theodore may not be a Death Eater, but he is, in his own way, as ruthless as them
Author's Response: Thank you.
As you say, other than the fact that he’s “weedy” we know almost nothing about Theodore Nott. It seemed to me that he Nott was a loner, he certainly didn’t join Draco’s gang. I see him as being amoral rather than immoral.-N-
Excellent story! Good to see Albus all grown up.
I think I may have caught one mistake, though. When you mentioned the Potter family home you said Grimauld, shouldn't that be Drakeshaugh? I hate to be a nit-picker in your own canon, but all your stories are so inter-connected that I'd also hate to have an error slip through.
Just putting my keen powers of observation to good use.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review.
Albus is certainly all grown up. Mistake? Perhaps at some point there is an incident which necessitates the Potters returning to London? :-D
So little Annie Charlton grew up to be a foul-mouthed muggle law student. Not at all what I expected. I was sure she was going to turn out to be a witch after your response to my Owl Post comment, and I had a rather different picture of Harry coming to her house on her eleventh birthday.
This also explains why the Potters moved back to Grimmauld Place. The kids were all away at school, the thirty acres of woods just sat ignored, and Ginny and Jacqui had become estranged over James little prank. I should have figured you hadn't made a rookie mistake in Zygosis.
It's a very nicely done story. You have a real knack for getting into the heads of your characters and showing the world from their various perspectives: male or female; young or old; magical or muggle.
I'm really looking forward to the rest of this story, and even more to the next chapter of H&P.
I don't know if this is really the right place to ask, but I have a request. I'd like to see a story by you (my favorite fanfic author) from Hagrid's (my favorite character) pov, or at least with him heavily featured. Perhaps you could do it for your bachelor party chapter of Epithalamium.
Annabel is having a stressful day. She's certainly foul mouthed at the beginning of the story, but don't assume that she's always like that. (Although it's possible that she is. :-D) My owl post comment was deliberately vague. A lot of people wanted one of the charltons to end up at Hogwarts. I thought that would be too easy.
There is actually more to the estrangement that simply the prank. But that's another unwritten story, and it's one which Annie and Jacqui have mysteriously forgotten all about. I was evasive about a Zygosis review, too (yours?). I try not to give away too much in review replies.
There will be more next-gen from me, but not for a while. I intend to concentate on H&P and Strangers.
I'm well aware that I have neglected two very important characters. Hagrid, and Teddy. I'm intending to rectify that oversite.
Ah yes, James is very much like his namesake: bold; brash; charming; arrogant: and the sort of guy that would tend to drift if there wasn't a "Great Cause" to be taken on.
Enjoyed the whole thing a great deal. I most enjoyed the confrontation between Simon and James, and the last line is PERFECT!
Now onto H&P!
Author's Response: Thank you.
James is, I think, still looking for his cause in this story. I have a few ideas about where he will find it.The confrontation was, I hope, fairly understated, I didn’t want a shouting match.
YAY!! A story from Neil with Hagrid in it!
Hagrid has always been my favorite character in part because he reminds me of a very good friend of mine in both appearance and behavior. My friend is also mistaken for Santa Claus by small children, which he finds endlessly entertaining.
The story was very well done. I had no trouble understanding your "preschool dialect", which I thought was about as close as you can get to the way kids her age talk.
So, thanks for another Christmas story gem!
Thanks for the review.
I think that I’ve always shied away from writing Hagrid because of his accent, which I find difficult to write. In a way I cheated here. Using Annie meant that I didn’t actually need to write much Hagrid dialogue.
Pre-school dialect is a good way to describe it. The big question is, will I get the second (and final) chapter “When Jacqui met Hagrid” finished for Christmas. It’s looking unlikely.
Excellent story, not fluffy at all, and a great ending. So I have to ask, Neil... were you a punk-rocker in the 70's or is this all the result of some research into the 70's scene?
Author's Response: This is the result of a lot of research into the 70’s music scene (some of which ended up in the much fluffier “Vault”). -N-