Hey, love your story, just want to point out a spelling mistake. In your story summary, "steeling" should be spelt "stealing". Please keep writing!
Lily Evans and James Potter share absolutely nothing in common, not even their feelings for each other. Lily, perceived as a ‘model student,’ detests the handsome, popular, Quidditch star James, who she thinks to be something of a git. James, on the contrary, has been infatuated with Lily for years, and has let her and the whole school know it.
As time progresses into Voldemort’s ‘reign of terror,’ the two have to learn to trust, tolerate, and love each other.
Please note, this story is incomplete, and will likely remain so for a long time. I apologize!
what i surprise! i certainly wasn't expecting that but it adds a whole other dimension to the story. well done. i feel so sorry for lily and james. please update soon!
I'm really enjoying your story so please keep writing. It's also nice to read a story that has proper grammar and spelling! Keep it up!
Great beginning to the story, I'm going to keep reading. Also like the way James and Lily interact - it seems plausible
Author's Response: Thanks! I try to make James and Lily speak in a way I know that real people would actually speak to each other. I'm glad the effort paid off!
Wow. I think this is the first story I've read involving two completely original characters as the main romance. I'm very interested in further developments. Keep up the originality!
Wow, you had me right to the end! Great storytelling. I totally thought it was Harry, Ginny and Malfoy! Loved it!
I like the parallels drawn between Harry and Lupin...they really fit. I also like the awkwardness between them because neither of them feel completely comfortable. Really interested in reading more if you have more to write!
Hey, just wanted to say keep writing because it's really sweet. I really like Hermione and Draco together and he is so nice in your story. Please update soon!
Wow, what an interesting perspective on James and Lily's early interaction. I also like the way you are presenting the story, some parts in present time and some flashbacks. Looking forward to the next chapter!
Author's Response: Thanks there ^^ Hope you like the next chapter -MM
Some really nice imagery there, you can really feel Tonk's pain. Well done on a sad piece - will there be more?
Author's Response: Thanks so much! :D Yeah I've written another poem, from Remus' point of view, which will be in queue very soon.
And no, contrary to beliefs very likely impressed upon you by this summary, I'm not a gormless prat.
Well... not entirely.
Yay! A different perspective on the Mauraders! I really like your James Lily interaction too. Is there going to be more to the story? I'd love to read it!
Author's Response: Yay! I am very fond of this particular perspective, she is my current darling, so the fact you don't want to chase her out of the Potterverse with a pitchfork is good news. And Lily is one of my absolute favourite characters in this story, there will definitely be lots more of her. And yes there's more--at this point, fifteen chapters more! *grins* Thanks for reviewing. ~Kim
A really original piece, your story really made me think. You captured an alternative path really well and made it believable. I got your message clearly too...what an amazing piece of writing. Well done!
Author's Response: Hey, thank you very much for your review. I'm glad that you thought the themes of the piece came across clearly, and that the whole thing was believable. It wasn't a difficult piece to write; the whole thing seemed to flow as I worked on it, so I was worried that I wasn't struggling enough for it! Thank you very much for your support.
Yes, I am kind, and do try to see the beauty in everyone, but I am a little wrapped up in myself. I have too many thoughts.
WARNINGS: Angsty, upsetting, some mild language and fighting later on. Not an average teen James/Lily fic.
You're story really touched me and I loved it. So many emotions, so much passion, so much regret. A fresh perspective too - I like the way James and Sirius disagree about Lily. Thanks for writing this.
Author's Response: :D thanks! Chap 3 in que!
Nice, really nice. I like seeing Fred as an individual and also investigating Angelina's character more, as she seems overlooked in the books. Great work.
Love it! Fantastic! Finally, reading something that's mostly grammatically correct, congratulations. It makes for a much nicer and easier read. I also like the storyline, very original and intriguing.
Wow! Nice work. Just a couple of comments. I like the way you don't reveal the identities of the characters until the end, as it prevents the reader from making judgements without considereing the situation. However I'm not sure about Tom Riddle Snr's reaction to discovering his wife is a witch and that he never really loved her. I think he would be more upset about the fact that she is a witch, which seems abhorrent to his nature as I imagine it, rather than an emotion such as love. Also, maybe a little more time and contemplation is required to have a greater impact on the reader. By extending the anguish Tom Riddle Snr feels, you could really make the story believable. Otherwise well done!
Well, it certainly wasn't bad! I think there's lots of room for development of these two very complex characters you've chosen. I also think its good to have a plot as well as a romance...I can see the Wolfsbane Potion becoming a greater part of the story.
Ps: Paragraph 1: Ron Weasley, not Weasely
Author's Response: wow thanks!!! im so excited because you reviewed!!! i have the story done already but i will work on it more and i will make it have more depth. Thank you so much!!! P.S. thanks for correcting me!!! im gonna go change it right now!! -Pam
Wow, how original! Very different from anything else I've read recently, and in a great way. Are you thinking of expanding this to a longer story? There is lots of potential. Thanks heaps for the great read!
Author's Response: I am thinking of doing more on this--maybe a companion piece. But I won\'t have time for a while. I want to finish my story at Ashwinder (Shades) first.
A great story, really moving and touching. Can't wait for more. You've incorporated the flashbacks really well, they flow nicely, which is hard to find! And great grammar and spelling too. Excellent, I really enjoyed it.
Author's Response: Thank you very much! I\'m so glad the flashbacks are working for you. I was concerned that it would be confusing going back and forth between past and present. Thanks for saying it\'s touching. That\'s very sweet. And it\'s nice to hear that the mechanics of it are good, too. Thanks so much for reviewing!
Wow, what a powerful piece - this is what struck me after reading your work. I like the anonymity you've given to your characters...even Harry, the person we all know well through the books, takes on a kind of nameless transparency within your story. You've portrayed him as more than the Harry we know, and it works really well. I also like the actual personality of your original character. The hindsight she displays is particularly relevant to your theme of history, looking back, and to the written histories. This is something that you could explore more, the truth's relationship with history and how this is important for the characters...but perhaps that something for another story. Well done on a really thoughtful and inspiring piece.