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hermione210 [Contact]

Hi! I'm Becca.

Current stories (Status updated 4/7/09):

Remembrance- Hiatus for now... Sorry! Last chapter being completely annoying.

The Little Girl In White- my baby. My first mystery, currently being rewritten as the floppy disk with the next three chapters on it got erased. Runner-up for the History-Mystery category in the 2008 QSQs! Thanks everyone!

Someone Beside Me- my first story. One-shot.

Healing Roads is a Gauntlet fic. It's not my favorite fic, but it's not the worst thing I've ever written.

Surviving Christmas Eve is a challenge fic. Again, not my favorite (TLGIW holds that position), but it gets a very strong reaction out of people, and I love it that my writing can affect people like that.

Becca loves writing fanfics, writing in general, reading (especially the HP series and random books she finds at the local library), select TV shows- House in particular- and dancing.

Favorite color: Blue. Favorite HP book: Whichever I've read most recently. Favorite HP character: Lily Evans Potter, Luna Lovegood, and Ron Weasley because they're fun to write. Favorite hobbies: Dancing, reading, procrastinating, and talking in the third person.

Becca hopes you have enjoyed learning about her. She also hopes that you will read and review her stories, but realizes that not everyone has the time to do that. So she simply asks that you give her a general idea of how you felt about a story you read- loved it, hated it, or anything in between. She appreciates your time, but must leave now.


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Stories by hermione210 [6]
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Reviews by hermione210


Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 12/15/07 Title: None

Well, I must admit my first thought was, 'Wow, Snape is CRANKY.' But I suppose everyone's allowed to be cranky once in a while. And besides, it was funnier this way.

And I do like the comparisons between Snape and Scrooge, but I don't know how many kids at Hogwarts would actually know about A Christmas Carol. And Snape seems a bit... extreme here. He goes from SuperCranky!Snape to Can'tStopLaughing!Snape. Overall, though, very good and very funny.

A History Lesson by Seren

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: The Last Battle has come to Hogwarts, and Harry has been taken to fight. Ron and Hermione are resolved to join him on the field, no matter what. Together, with Dean and Luna, they remind the students of Hogwarts just what it means to be not only a hero, but a person.
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 12/01/06 Title: Chapter 1: [Do Not Go Gently Into The Night]

My, oh my, Seren. I really loved this. Your characterization of Ron and Hermione were absolutely amazing.

Hermione, as always, was getting her information from books and using her supreme logic skills to effectively argue a point and get everyone else to agree. She was using some of her amazing speaking abilities to help her even more in her argument, i.e.:

"There are few laws in human existence that ever stay the same," she began, "they change with time and circumstances, they evolve with society and progress with civilization. But amongst the staidness of a mundane existence, there is a beautiful chaos within us. A life force driven by love and compassion, which few seek and less obtain. It is this love that allows a band of strangers, held together only by their shared humanity, to lay down their futures for other strangers."

I also loved how you characterized Ron. Ron was upset that he couldn’t find Harry and was leaning to his other friend, Hermione, for support, as he tends to do. He can be independent, but he also needs his friends. And then his story about the ‘Second Great Muggle War’ was amazing. It showed that he did have a love for history after all, but it showed something else. It showed his great love for fame, but his understanding that fame was not everything.

Absolutely amazing. I plan on reading some more of your fics soon!


A Death Eater's Christmas by the nutty imp

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: 12 Days of Christmas - HP Style - Focuses on Barty Crouch Jr.

(Although I don’t really think that this is that disturbing… I think I still ought to post a warning.)
Warning: This is not a happy and humourous Christmas-sy tale. It gives us a brief look at the disturbing deranged mind of Barty Crouch Jr.

Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 12/03/07 Title: Chapter 1: Winter Snows Challenge # 4

Hey Miel! I don’t think I’ve read any of your poetry before. This is really great! And I love how you had the contrast between Barty Jr.’s song and Barty Sr.’s song. Just a few little nitpicks…

Snow was falling outside, Barty Crouch Jr. shivered…

Maybe replace that comma with a period?

“Dear, he had it coming. He knew the consequences of his action,” the man by her side tried to soothe her.

I’d suggest actions there instead of action.

His eyes hardened as he watched the youth within the Dark cell. “He’s no longer a son of mine.”

I wouldn’t capitalize dark here.

The couple left Azkaban, Bartemius Crouch Sr. looked up towards one of the cell windows…

Again, I’d replace that comma with a period. Otherwise, really great, Miel, you really captured the essence of Jr.’s twisted mind and how Sr. felt and the amazing contrast between the two.

(And I hope that made sense.)


Quidditch and Love by Ivona Queens

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Arianna Perry just wants someone to talk to, maybe even be her friend. Charlie Weasley wants someone to like him for who he is, and not because of his Quidditch talent. When Ari and Charlie meet, a strong friendship bonds the two. However, being "just friends" seems impossible to both...but is risking their friendship for a possible love worth it?
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 10/21/06 Title: Chapter 1: The Plan

Hi, Ivona Queens!

I just wanted to drop in and say that I loved this story. Arianna was an amazingly believable character. I liked how you gave her different personality traits- determination, for one. Arianna was afraid of flying, but she did it anyway. She was afraid many times during her friendship with Charlie, but she kept going and it paid off.

There was no doubt in my mind, throughout the entire story, that you had almost climbed into Arianna’s head- Charlie’s too, for that matter. You kept true to what we know about Charlie from cannon, but gave him more of a personality than what we see in the books.

Anyway, back to Arianna. She would stand out in a crowd of people even if I was five miles away. You knew exactly what she was like and how she would react. You never contradicted yourself- I’ve read fics where people talk about how smart the character is, but then they write a scene where the character fails a test they studied for. Or where a character is just so brave, but then they are too scared to face something slightly scary. Arianna was scared, yet determined, the whole time. She was persistant and kind, funny and confident. There was never one instance where I said, ‘Oh, she shouldn’t have done that! I thought she was ___!’. Great job, and I can’t wait to start reading the sequel!

Author's Response: Oh, wow! *bows* Thank you!!! Ari was much easier for me to write, partly because she\'s a girl, and partly because she\'s my own creation, so I don\'t have to follow the rules of cannon. I think that we really start to see Ari\'s character when she asks Charlie to stop calling her \'Arianna\' - by using her full name, she\'s still hiding her personality. With a nickname, she\'s more herself, and you can know her better. I hope you like the sequel!! =)

Something Out of Nature by stardust

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Remus Lupin and Lily Evans run into each other in Diagon Alley and have a pleasant talk over a pleasant meal. Two friends discuss cabbages and kings to wear out a long lunch hour, and end up discovering things about each other’s lives that neither had had a chance to glean before. (Oneshot. This is my first fic, so reviews are very much appreciated!)
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 12/06/06 Title: Chapter 1: Summer, 1977.

Hello! I loved your story, but that’s not the only reason why I’m reviewing- I wanted to make a few comments about your characterization of Lily and Remus.

I loved how you gave Lily back her mischievous side where you were talking about how she threatened to turn Petunia into escargot. So many authors forget about the frogspawn and nose-biting teacups Petunia mentioned in PS/SS. However, I think she lost her personality at the end, where she shied away from Remus after figuring out that he is a werewolf. I think that Lily wouldn’t have done that- she values friendship and is very loyal.

I think, however, that you kept Remus very in character. At the end, when he was talking about how ‘the wolf had no hold on him’… It was all very IC. Good job!

I hope to see more from you soon- and congrats on the QSQ award!


Author's Response: Thank you, Becca! I\'m happy you enjoyed it and happier still for the constructive criticism. Let me say how glad I am that you pointed out what you felt to be OOC with Lily. I quite agree that she\'s a loyal friend, and my only intent was to portray her momentary shock/impulse, not to imply any real wavering. Lily\'s being \"ambushed\" with information, if you will, in the situation; it was a rather selfish occurrence in plot to encourage a bit of a reaction from Remus. Lily deserves better than that, though. =) I\'ll keep your comments in mind if ever I get around to reviewing the second half. This story is almost a year old and I daresay a bit of editing is long overdue. Thanks so much again!

Ariel and The Triwizard Cup by Purplemage

Rated: 6th-7th Years •
Summary: Get inside Ariel Sachs' head as he tries to survive his last year at Hogwarts. The Triwizard Tournament is going to be hosted once again after twenty-three years and Ariel is going to find himself in the middle of it. He soon learns that in love and war anything goes and that things are not always what they appear. A story of jealousy, gossip, teenage hormones and first love. (Rated for later chapters)

QSQ Award for Best Male OC, Ariel Sachs

QSQ Nomination for best Same-Sex Pairing Fic

I can't thank enough my wonderful beta Lys. Without her this fic wouldn't be posible.
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 08/23/06 Title: Chapter 9: An Article and a Revenge

Hi, Harald! I saw others praising your work in the CR, so I decided to check it out.

What a lovely story. I absolutely love Ariel! And he's got a date! Yay! I felt so bad for him when Christian started dating Ivy. I love how you've portrayed everything about him. His love of sleep, how his mum thinks he doesn't write often enough, how he and Nessa get along- I just love it!!!!!!

I can't wait until Chapter 10 is validated! (*pokes almighty modlies* Validate Chapter 10 PLEASEEEEEEE) I will definitely be following this story from now on!


Author's Response: Yay!!! A fellow Gryffindor!! I\'m so happy you decided to give my story a chance! I can\'t wait either till chapter 10 gets validated, *pokes mods with Becca* Thanks for the review!

Between a Chinese Fireball and an Amaryllis by Purplemage

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: "Sometimes, just sometimes the right decision is not always the one that makes the most sense."

Heather hadn’t wanted to see Charlie Weasley because she knew it would awaken many memories and feelings she had put to sleep a long time ago, but once she saw him she couldn’t help, wanting to know what he had been up to. Where had her lost love gone?

This story was the first price winner for the Weasley's Wizard Wheezes one-shot challenge .
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 10/28/06 Title: Chapter 1: Between a Chinese Fireball and an Amaryllis

Hey Harald!

I absolutely loved this one-shot. The way you presented Heather’s personality made her unbelievably, well, believable. She was happy and excited when she was around Fred, George, and Ginny, authoritative around Birger, and carefree and kind when around Charlie. It is, of course, human nature to act differently in different situations, and I was amazed at how I saw you manipulate that little bit of human nature in your story.

To me, it seems you really climbed into the character’s minds. You had Fred and George react with shock when they couldn’t believe something, but had them quickly get over the shock as they do in the books. You had Ginny holding a grudge against Heather for hurting Charlie, but had Ginny forgive her. You had every bit of their characters down. You didn’t contradict canon, or yourself, in any part of the story. You had them react in ways that I would expect any person to react, so that really made this story more believable for me.

Can’t wait to start reading more of your stories!


Author's Response: Hey!! Characterization is my favorite part of writing, co I\'m happy it shows and that you think is good! This is the first time I wrote Fred and George, I\'m so relieved I didn\'t make a disaster of them. For me, Ginny is one of the hardest characters to write, seriously. I never get her, but it seems that I did a decent job this time around. Thanks so much for the review!

Bound by lily_evans34

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Hedwig reflects upon her life, and her relatioship with Harry. Written for the One Shot Owls challenge by lily_evans34 of Ravenclaw.
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 08/01/06 Title: Chapter 1: Bound

What an interesting story. It was very interesting to see your perspective on what went on in Hedwig’s head.

I really liked your descriptions, especially in the first paragraph. You used beautiful, precise words to accurately describe a scene.

I also liked the fact that you gave Hedwig complex emotions. She’s always seemed much more perceptive than many of Harry’s other friends. In real life, I don’t think owls think like that, but that is one of the beauties of the magical world- anything is possible. I thought it was very interesting to see how she felt when Harry started to withdraw from his friends.

Great job all around!

Author's Response: Thank you! I\'m glad you liked the way I wrote Hedwig!

Hope by Hermione2723

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Dedicated to all the Hurricane Katrina refugees. As Harry helps fix up Godric's Hollow after the final battle with the few people who aren't out celebrating, he comes to realize how selfish people can actually be.
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 06/30/06 Title: Chapter 1: Hope

Wow. That was amazing. Really sad, but amazing. I loved it. Good job. No, I take it back. Great job.

What She Was by AlexisTaylor

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Post WWIII, Charlie returns home for Christmas, and finds at least one person who has changed. Hermione/Charlie
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 04/04/07 Title: Chapter 1: What She Was

Well. I, for one, am amazed.

I don’t normally read much Hermione / Other Character, so I was surprised at how much I enjoyed this. The way you set the stage for this scene made me totally able to understand every single reaction that the characters had.

I also loved your descriptions. They were so vivid that I felt as if I was watching it unfold before my eyes, instead of reading about it on this wonderful site. Especially when you were describing Charlie’s reactions to what the Death Eaters did to the dragons, I felt that Charlie was a real person and that the dragon’s really had been abused.

All in all, I think you did an amazing job. I hope you keep writing!


Something In The Water by Seren

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: He's Harry, little Harry the Seeker who was small and stubby and cute in the same way your stuffed animal is cute. Katie Bell's got a problem. Post-War.
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 04/04/07 Title: Chapter 1: Something In The Water

That was a very creative plot line. I haven’t seem much Harry/Katie around here, and I must say that I really liked the way you wrote it.

I was very impressed at how you kept the characters in character at all times, which I think is very hard to do with Harry. I was also impressed that you wrote in the present tense, and that you wrote WELL in present tense, as I think that present tense is very hard to pull off.

I loved how you wrote Katie’s thoughts at the beginning. I felt that she really saw Harry for Harry, and not as the hero who saved the Wizarding world. If these characters were real, this would definitely be an important aspect of their relationship, which helped make the scene all the more realistic.

He's Harry, little Harry the Seeker who was small and stubby and cute in the same way your stuffed animal is cute.

I really liked how this description was written. It shows another aspect that makes Harry and Katie’s relationship seem extremely real. It also reminded me a bit of how Harry kept trying to convince himself that his feelings for Ginny were brotherly in the beginning of HBP.

All in all, I’m very impressed at how well you wrote this ship. Well done!


Blood Ties by Sly Severus

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: A young woman feels as though she has lost it all, until she accidently runs into someone from her past.

For the December Challenge, The Winter Miracle Option. By Sly Severus of Slytherin House.
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 12/15/07 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Wow, this is really wonderful. I haven’t read a lot of fics that were centered on the dynamics between Bellatrix and Andromeda, and I’m really glad I read this one. When we see Bella later in her life, most of the human element is gone, but she must have had it some time, and it’s great to read a story about one of those times.

A few nitpicks- When she finally spoke all the warmth had left her voice. I’d put a comma between ‘spoke’ and ‘voice’ here.

“You’re welcome,” Bellatrix replied as she walked off to the nearest store to buy her niece’s presents. Erm… St. Mungo’s isn’t in Diagon Alley. I don’t think it’s even located near there. And I doubt there are random wizarding shops sprinkled around London where Bellatrix could buy a toy broomstick, among other things. Maybe she Apparated to Diagon Alley? I don’t know, but this just wasn’t making sense to me the way it is now.

“I didn’t even know you had a daughter. With the Mudblood, I suppose. What’s wrong with her?” I love how you have Bella being insulting and caring at the same time. It suits her.

She may be the daughter of a Mudblood but that’s not her fault. She’s still my niece. Aw! Bella does have heart.

Overall, very well written. I truly enjoyed reading this story. Keep writing!

Author's Response: Thank you!

All I Want for Christmas is Peace by crazy_purple_hp_freak

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Christmas won't be the same now that the world is at war. This year, all that Ginny hopes for is for everyone to be alive; she hopes for peace.

Parody of "All I want for Christmas is you"

Second in the Prompt #2 of the Winter Tales Challenge!
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 12/15/07 Title: Chapter 1: All I Want for Christmas is Peace

Suzie, I have no words to describe to you how I’m feeling right now. It’s sad, but happy, hopeful yet despairing… You see what you do to me?

In all seriousness, though, this is really good. I’m especially in love with that one part near the end where it talks about ending it all even if it’s just for Christmas. It reminded me so powerfully of what my English teacher told us last year when we were reading All Quiet on the Western Front- about how the opposing troops called a truce on Christmas and were playing games with each other in no-man’s-land, but the day after Christmas they went back to trying to kill each other. It struck a chord then and it’s striking one know as I read your poem. I don’t know why- something about that whole Christmas spirit thing, even in wartime, just makes me get all mushy inside. (Great, now I’m going to melt… water will be all over the floor… I’ve got to go back outside and repair my snow-intestines.) You did a great job, Suzie. Keep writing.

Fools by GringottsVault711

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Percy seeks salvation, and is given an unexpected reaction from the woman in whom he seeks solace. [Percy/Penelope].
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 03/26/07 Title: Chapter 1: Fools

Wow. Just… Wow.

I’m amazed. This is utterly different than the normal characterization a person sees of Percy Weasley, and I must say I’m very impressed. You took a person who seemed to be a traitorous, self-centered, pompous jerk and showed WHY he seemed like that. Not only that, though, you took it a step further. You showed that he felt sorry for seeming like he does, how he wishes he could take it all back. And I’m absolutely amazed.

In this one-shot, you showed an incredible amount of development of the relationship between Percy and Penelope. You showed how they felt about each other, how Percy apologized for the actions that made Penelope think badly of him, and how they felt about each other after. You took their relationship from rock-bottom and raised it up so that is has the potential to soar in the sky. Your charictarization was perfect, while being just far away enough from the standard characters that you could tell that you had made the characters your own.

You have an amazing writing ability. Please keep writing! I’d love to see more of your Percy.


Nothing Gold Can Stay by dumbledorefluertwins

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Natures first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower,
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf,
So Eden sank to grief.
So dawn goes down to day,
Nothing gold can stay.

Ginny takes an early morning stroll, and remembers.

Poem by Robert Frost. Character death is only mentioned.
Reviewer: hermione210 Signed
Date: 12/15/07 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Wow, Evie. This is so amazingly well written. I have no nitpicks (which is a shock for me- my one friend once called me the Grammar Queen and told me I was way too strict with my ‘subjects’, so pat yourself on the back for that one), but I must say I love the contrast in here. You have all these images in the beginning, where the world is quiet and perfect, but the moment is fleeting and all those images come back in the opposite of what they were. Even Ginny’s point of view changes- from seeing the day as something to get through to looking forward to it. You really did a wonderful job with this.

Author's Response: Thank you! :D ~Evie