I am a recent member of the Harry Potter fandom, but I have always had a passion for the written word, and I hope to fulfill it here. I live in a relatively boring corner of Idaho, and I like Kokanee and a good book!
So, I suppose you're wondering what's up with my username. Even if you're not, this is how that happened. No, I was not aspiring to be a Gryffindor. I can't think of any house to which I would belong less than Gryffindor, in fact. It was a moment of clarity that I got while I was battling with myself about whether I should want to be Sorted into Gryffindor to be like Harry or to be Sorted elsewhere and follow my own path. I thought it to be much like the contemplative scene in Hamlet when he weighed taking his own life. I'm not trying to be melodramatic. That's simply is what popped into my head when I was trying to sign up to leave a review. :D
Any questions or comments about my work? Please shoot me an email at: firstname.lastname@example.org — I'd love to hear from you!
Awesome! I've always been a Rose/Scorpius fan. This story is a great representation of the peace brought about by the end of the Great War, and that prejudices can often be overcome by a simple, candid conversation.
Well done, hope to read more of your work soon.
Incredible internal dialogue for Hermione! I believe losing the one person in the world that means the most to you would definitely send some into madness.
I love it!
Author's Response: Wow, I think I totally missed this review at the time (but I had house guests for almost two weeks in October so maybe that's why - sorry!) A very belated thank you for the review! I wrote this for a challenge, it was fun and a little amazing to see what popped out of my head. Quite different, for once. ;) Thanks so much for reading this story, I really appreciate the review!! ~Gina :)
I love this story! It's nice to see all those little Slytherin pure-blood maniacs thwarted by one of their own. There are so many places that this story can go, and I would love to read further adventured of Miss Black and the ever-charming Mr Hitchens.
Author's Response: Thank you very much for the review. Mmm, perhaps I will have to write more about them. ~Carole~
Absolutely excellent! The Dementor's Kiss in the perspective of the Dementor is a completely unique perspective, and I think you did beautifully.
I love the fact that Adrien thwarted the Dementor in the end, even if the man was a thief and a murderer.
Extremely well done, IMO.
Author's Response: You're the first to review this story! Yay! I got all excited (as I usually do) when I received an e-mail saying that it was approved! =D I've been waiting for a plot to come into mind...I wanted to write something dark and yet artistic? I'm not sure if that's the correct word lol, but this came into my head one day and I got writing!
First off, I'm really glad you liked my characterization of the Dementor! I didn't have much reference, so it was a nice challenge *smiles* Secondly, I don't usually like killing off my characters, but it suited the situation and I couldn't let it by ^_^
Thank you so much for taking the time to review! I really appreciate it!
I have to admit, reading a story where Teddy isn't going to die a horrible death is nice. :D
Teddy is so good in this story. I like how he is precocious, but not in the typical way. He doesn't often interact with children of his own age, instead spending time with his grandmother. It gives him a more mature attitude toward things, such as trying to make his Gran and his godfather see that he doesn't prefer one to the other. Most children would reap the benefits and milk as much stuff out of it as they could, but Teddy is just not like that. He just wants everyone to be happy. But how you did it and still managed to maintain his childlike demeanour was great. Love that bit.
I was a little unsure about the idea of Harry ever trying to one-up Andromeda, because I sort of always had the impression that he would yield to her in most things, especially if he had any inkling that he might upset her. But that's moot, because that's just my opinion and it's your story; just something to consider, I guess.
I love the bit about the wand. From the moment Henry said that the wand had a phoenix core, I felt soooo bad for Andromeda. It almost felt like Harry had won the strange little tug-of-war. I was relieved that Teddy got to keep the wand, though. I was slightly annoyed with him, despite his good intentions, for trying to give up the perfect wand to make his gran happy. The resolution was great, plus Teddy got that extra connection with his mum.
One thing I wouldn't mind knowing, though, is if there is some sort of connection to Remus in there somewhere. Canonically, he doesn't have a specific wand, so perhaps the length... or that might broach the realm of being contrived. Nonetheless, I wouldn't mind finding some connection to Remus, even if it's his grindylow tank. XD
Lovely story with a happy ending. I don't read many of those these days, so it was nice. Bye for now. :D
This review was brought to you by the Ravenclaw Order of the House Elves.
Awesome, awesome, awesome, awesome, AWESOME!!!!!!!!!
I heart you for adding just one more bittersweet chapter to what has to be my favorite fan fic EVER. I hold this story closer to my heart than all but two of JK's own works, and I truly mean that!
I was so happy that Tom felt just that slightest shred of remorse, enough to stay with Keeds forever and ever. Who knew I'd ever be hoping for a happy ending for the most evil wizard that walked the planet, but you have done that, and it was fabulous.
Exquisite epilogue, quite exquisite.
PS Frick on a stick with a brick! I had to submit this review like a half dozen times before it would post properly.
Author's Response: :D Thanks for such a lovely review. I'm glad your effors paid off and it finally posted. So glad you liked it :D
Absolutely precious and immensely hilarious. Well done, and thanks for sharing. :-D
Author's Response: I'm glad you found it funny, I thought about putting it in the Humor category but wasn't sure if it was quite that humorous. Thanks so much for reading it and leaving such a nice review, I appreciate it! ~Gina :)
After time, Goyle deals with Crabbe’s death.
Hi there, SPEW buddy!
You’ve chosen a very looked-over character for which to paint an intimate portrait. Goyle isn’t exactly what one would call a thinker, but in Azkaban, there would probably not been much to do other than that.
At first, I was a little put off with the repetition of certain things, such as: ‘The inside of the room was cluttered; it was a surprise that he found his project every time. It was a surprise that he didn’t get lost.’ However, when I read over it again, I looked at it from a different perspective. When I talk things out with myself, which is much like thinking aloud, I suppose, I do tend to repeat myself. Now, when I see it as a personal mental narrative instead of just a regular narrative, it makes much more sense to me.
I really like your use of simple words and phrases. Goyle is the furthest from a genius that one can get, so making him sound loquacious instead of simple in his words would have been disingenuous.
To be honest, I myself always pictured things going on between Crabbe and Goyle. Even after they ditched Malfoy, they still spent a majority of their time with one another during their seventh year. Either they were the best of friends or they were just a bit more than that. I personally don’t have the cojones to write about it, but I think you did so beautifully. I don’t think I’ve ever even seen another Crabbe/Goyle story, so we can add unique to the list of pluses to this story.
I think one of my favourite aspects of the story was when Goyle, instead of being grateful that the ‘Gryffindors’ saved his life, he wondered why they couldn’t save Crabbe, too. It just shows that he really did care about Crabbe as much as he cared about himself. I like to think that everyone, no matter how evil they seem, has a shred of decency inside. I really love how you bring forth Goyle’s. He loved another human being as much as himself, and that’s a step in the right direction for his recovery after Azkaban.
Another thing I really like is how you separated Crabbe and Goyle in terms of their relative cruelty. To me, it’s interesting to see them not put in the same thought or in the same breath. Crabbe is the cruel, slightly sadistic one, whereas Goyle is more passive and less inclined to kill. To most, they’re basically interchangeable characters, but I adore the fact that you made them individual. This site could use more Crabbe and/or Goyle stories.
I do have a consistency nitpick. Toward the beginning, you note that the Dark Lord had sent them all to guard the diadem, but in DH, they followed Harry and company into the RoR to bring him to Voldemort. They had no idea what a ‘die-dum’ was or whether it held any real significance. Draco was the only one who noted that the diadem would hold importance if the Trio was looking for it at a time like that. Perhaps, with a minor bit of editing, that could be fixed for canon compliance, which I assume what you’re aiming for.
All in all, I really loved this story. You took a first person POV piece and you made it pensive, not ponderous. It wasn’t angsty or whiny; it was honest and full of all the right questions for someone like Goyle to ask of himself and of the universe. Very well done, and I’m glad I picked this story of yours to read.
Take care and happy writing,
You just lie there before me, before my canvas, while I immortalise your being - while I give your life purpose - through colour and shape. People are going to look back on this work and say, “She was important.” They will say that you had a life with meaning.
Is your life meaningful, my dear?
Here sits an artist. Before him, his subject. Where will this piece of art take them? And where have they been before? For in the future lies the past and in the past there lies no future. Follow them on their journey through time and paint, through canvas and passion.
An entry by the opaleye of Slytherin to the Lofty Learning One-Shot Challenges: The Science of Portraiture
Ah, the memories...
I am, of course, referring to the way-back-when time that I was a scared little bunny of a newbie and never left reviews for anything I read. Well, I'm here to rectify that a bit.
I remember reading this when it was brand new. I just couldn't comprehend how someone could crawl around in the head of such an unknown character and still manage to convince me that this was really him, that this was the true Rodolphus. I love that fresh face that you put on every story as you take an unknown pocket in time and make it into your own, and this is yet another win for you here with PH Rodolphus. Even Narcissa is a different shade of herself here, but it was still her to me.
I suppose I do have one thing that I would want to nitpick, and it's in the following part:
How could I love her dark, unwelcoming eyes when I had your seductive grey ones in which to lose myself? I could stare into your eyes forever, my dear. Do not close them yet.
I will use this colour to render your eyes immortal, Narcissa. It will not do them justice; none of my paints could ever do such a thing, yet it is the best I have. I want Lucius to look at this painting and see your eyes staring back at him. I do not want them to be just anyone’s eyes; I want them to be yours, endless, lost to him in an eternity of nothingness.
It does read like a purposeful repetition theme, but I suppose seeing the same word five times in that short expanse and that word isn't 'a, and, the, you'... it's me being weird. Ignore me if you want (lol, I would). Just thought I'd attempt to be a helpful reviewer. :D
Again, such a fabulous fic, and it is a testament of how good you are by defailt alone, because even though this is one of your very first fics, it's still far and beyond 75% of anything on the archives, and you are better still today.
'Ello there, Miss Alice!
Congrats on the QSQ win, dear. You've written something with such stunning imagery, from the simple days of being in school to Andromeda having bloody nightmares about her children she didn't even have yet being killed. Though there is nearly no canon information about Andromeda, it just feels right for her. She would be in such a precarious place emotionally after giving up her entire familiar world for Ted, so naturally it would haunt her.
I think the thing I like the most about this fic is that it focusses on such simple things, like the cat and the day to day doldrums. The wedding is downplayed in a sense that the dream about the cat stomping the kids was more poignant and meaningful to her than her marriage.
I thought it was interesting how paranoid she was about her children ending up like Bella and Cissy. It's almost a relief to me as a reader to know that her daughter is almost as opposite of them as one can get with her lack of the poise that was so high in stock for the women of the Black family.
All in all, it was a fascinating trip into the mind of Andromeda Black Tonks. Her emotions and fears seemed real and probable, which is so different from most D/A pieces that melodramatise such things.
Ta for now, and until we meet again, etc...
This visit is a gift of the Ravenclaw Order of House Elves
I’ve always been your secret, never good enough to you’re your family about.
Just a minor oopsie, thought you'd like to know. :D
Ok, now on with the good part! I love Rose/Scorpius unconditionally, so yay for another story. I like the first person format, because Rose, as a Weasley, wears her heart on her sleeve, but as a Malfoy, Scorpius would not; that made me glad that the story was from his perspective. The scenarios are so believable, because I can really see Scorpius growing up just like Draco, prejudice oozing out of every pore, and I can also believe that Rose would sacrifice her life for the one she loves, no matter how poisonous that love may turn out to be.
All in all, it was extremely well-constructed, and IMO, well told. Thank you for writing this. :-)
Author's Response: Yay, a positive review from Jess! *SQUEEEEE* I'm particularly pleased that you liked the first person perspective, as writing in first person is so controversial and easily done poorly.
Nominated for the 2010 QSQ Awards for Best Poetry!
Ah, now here is where, in my mind, you have reversed the roles as they lived in my head. I always pictured Ginny as the one with the nightmares and Harry as finally dredging himself up by himself for her sake.
But as I read this, I can picture her, watching him sleep his troubled sleep, worried that he might not come back from his private hell the next time.
As you know, though...I don't believe in them as a couple, so I'm pretty jaded to the concept that she would be able to bring him back from his purgatory of nightmares.
All in all, minus my pedantic ramblings, I really enjoyed this sonnet, and I even found myself reading it in iambic pentameter in my head, lol.
Until we meet/I stalk again!
Author's Response: See, I said I have my canon moments and this is certainly one of those. I'm surprised you read this poem, Jess! But I'm glad that you enjoyed it despite the pairing. The prompt for the challenge was
I love how she tried to tell the Hat what's what, and it stuck her in Slytherin,as well as her reaction to her brother's dismay with her new House, as if he were shocked and ashamed.
I find your portrayals of the Slytherin girls believable and unique. Who would guess that big, brawny Bulstrode was really a semi-outcast and insecure?
All in all, I like this one as much as a first, and I'm looking forward to your future installments.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for understanding my story! I think Millicent has to be insecure because the Bulstrodes are an old, pure-blood line, but she is definitely listed as a half-blood in JKR's notes. She is not so much "outcast" as "knowing her place". She gets ahead in Slytherin by taking orders. You might say the same for Crabbe and Goyle, who are in fact pure-bloods, but depend heavily on the Malfoys' patronage. And, yes, despite your sympathetic response to Tracey, I'm afraid she is a true Slytherin. I'm just trying to tell the story from her point of view. So I hope you continue reading when she ceases to be likable.
Ah, another reason to not like Roger. I know he's a 'good guy' and all, but drat, I believe I don't like him. Poor Tracey, stuck for the next five years with a House full of people that hate her, but I believe she will do her utmost to either rectify the situation or get them all back.
I'm seriously getting into the Slytherin POV. Keep it up!
Author's Response: Dear Jess, The ease with which one can learn to think like a Slytherin is woryring, isn't it? Imagine what it's like when you live with them all day long! Roger didn't mean any harm (after all, the vast majority of Ravenclaws DON'T care about blood status) but of course Tracey is now in the mindset to blame her brother for everything that goes wrong. Obviously she'll have to stop blaming and start using her Slytherin cunning if she wants to improve matters. Don't worry, I promise you she will! Best wishes, GhV
Ah, brilliant girl! It's nice to see her back in the fold, so to speak.
One thing that most people forget is that the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws were not nearly as enamored with Hagrid as the Gryffindors. They didn't hate him as the Slytherins did, but there was not a whole lot for our inestimable half-giant.
At least they didn't like Umbridge...that would have been unfortunate. They merely recognized the need to be in her good favor for the sake of their social statuses and future career opportunities. It's hard to fault them for that, not to mention the desire to never seen the wrong end of that black quill.
In conclusion, after quite a bit of pedantic rambling, I thought this addition was brilliant.
Just a few minor issues. You mention Draco being attacked by the hippogriff 'last year', but it was the year before, in Third Year. Also, in this sentence: "I stopped thinking about the Firewhisky crate and focussed instead on the books stacked beside his bed", I believe there is only one 's' in focused.
Anyhoo, that's enough of my jabbering. :D
Author's Response: Thanks, Jess, ~ I don't have a beta reader so a few mistakes are slipping under the radar here. I can't remember why I said "last year" for the hippogriff incident - possibly because the execution date was only 18 months ago, hence "last calendar year". But if I need to make a more serious revision of this chapter, I'll correct these points too. ~ No, I don't believe the Slytherins LIKE Umbridge! I don't think it occurs to them to perceive human relationships in those terms. Does Draco like Vincent and Gregory? Does Millicent like anyone? I feel that Daphne frequently resents Pansy, yet she still describes her as her "best friend". ~ Thanks for your continued support. More follows soon. GhV
Ah, now I dislike Roger slightly less, because he helped her stick it to the Slytherins...but he's still a jerk, lol. I guess buying back favor is a tradition that extends to all the Houses, considering her Bones (Hufflepuff) Grandmother offered it.
Congrats on getting them to push your story through the queue so fast, I wish I could get them to do that for me.
Author's Response: Hi Jess, ~ I'm glad you saw a better side of Roger here. He just doesn't see the impact he has on his sister; he has no idea that she has so resentful, or what he contributed to the problem. ~ I don't know that Hufflepuffs would "buy back" favour; it's more a question of being nice to people regardless of what they have done to you. I actually think Tabitha Bones (nee Twillfit) would have been in Ravenclaw, where the perspective would be that wise people always try to neutralise their enemies and make as many friends as they can. I doubt that Tracey understands the differences between these three points of view; she just knows that "buying" people like Pansy costs more than she can afford to pay. ~ Thanks for reviewing. More to follow soon. Best wishes, GhV
Ah, poor Tracey, second fiddle yet again!
I hated it for her that she had to cheer for her brother just because everyone else was. It sucks, having to appease everybody to fit in, which is why Luna Lovegood is such a fascinating character, because she doesn't care at all. Tracey is almost the antithesis of that, and not too many authors delve into the mind of Slytherins not named Malfoy.
Still enchanted, still reading, and still like Tracey. :D
Author's Response: Dear TBONTBAG, I thought your comparison with Luna was very perceptive. Luna, despite her fantasies, has a fundamental honesty that constantly shipwrecks the deceit of people around her. Tracey, who is firmly pragmatic, has a fundamental DIShonesty that will refuse any information that is too uncomfortable. It's telling that you can sympathise with her anyway; such character flaws don't erupt in a vacuum. Thank you for your support, GhV
Hmm, poor Tracey, being stalked by Roger's legacy, even after he was long gone.
She really seems to be adapting to the Slytherin lifestyle, which she's properly using to her advantage.
It is unfortunate that Susan took her words as callousness and mean-spiritedness, because I really think that Tracey was just trying to paint a picture of better things for her cousin, whi didn't take it like that at all.
And nobody to love? That supremely sucks for her, because she couldn't love her brother for all the misery and neglect he had caused for her, and her parents lost her favor because of their adulation of Roger and their omission of her own achievements. Hopefully, she finds someone with which to share her life, not just someone who has visions of Galleons dancing in their head.
Author's Response: Yes, Tracey is by now utterly Slytherin in her approach. You're right, she was genuinely trying to cheer Susan up; but a more empathic person would have recognised that talk about money was a ridiculous strategy. Tracey is not happy about what happened to Aunt Amelia (unlike, say, Millicent), but nor does she greatly care. As for whether she loves anyone... Nobody springs to her mind at present, but perhaps she's overlooking something or someone? Tracey is not yet evil, but she has reached the stage where her habits and her environment are making it increasingly difficult to change her course.
Ah, even though she's not one of the bad ones, Tracey is a true blue (er, green, I guess) Slytherin, because she managed to make a potions accident and a Muggle textbook turn her into a gazillionaire. Cunning and ingenuity were Salazar Slytherin's strengths and his love, which Tracey has proven to have in spades, so brilliant for her!
I really like how you made her friends with Theo, who I thought was not a bad guy, just a guy in a bad situation. I'm also really glad nothing bad happened to her family and she could finally get over her hangups about Roger and move on with her life.
In essence, her dislike of her brother ended up giving her everything she ever wanted, because that=her Slytherin sorting=the potions accident=finding out about the attack on the cobbler=her reading that chem book=Tracey making diamonds from almost nothing. Wow, that's a long equasion, lol.
Well, in closing, I think this was a very good story, and you brought life to a background character about whom most would not have given a second thought, and you did so brilliantly. Thanks for writing, and I hope you've got more stories cooking in your head.
Author's Response: Thank you for all your support throughout this story, Jess. Tracey knows where her real friends are, she has got over Roger and she's going to be rich - so I hope you think that's a happy ending. ~ I didn't think it was realistic to turn her into a saint, so she's still selfish, but she has chosen not to be evil. Same for Theo, of course - his coldness and selfishness were caused by his father's bad example, but now he's chosen to get over it and will be morally normal. ~ I think Tracey might have worked out the diamond formula even if she hadn't been propelled by her resentment of Roger and the influence of her Slytherin friends, but I've no idea HOW it would have happened. Her story would have been altogether different. Did you notice the only chapter in the story that did NOT contain the word "diamond"? That's a clue to how Tracey's mind was working all along! ~ I did wonder whether it was worth publishing this story, given that Tracey is neither a major HP character nor very admirable. Thank you for letting me know that it was the right thing to do. Best wishes, GhV
Ah, to be the forgotten child! It's always a painful ordeal to be the offspring that received less adulation and more of the short end of the stick.
Nice touch, by the way, putting her in the Harry Potter closet (even real estate agents call it that, now). There are remarkable parallels between her home life and Harry's when he lived with the Dursleys. I just hope her lot improves at school, as well, because I like her. :D
In terms of style, the first person seems very fitting for this piece, because it allows you so much room to outline her insecurities and perceived shortcomings so well, as you have done. I am looking forward to further chapters!
Author's Response: Thank you! And congratulations on being the first to review this story - I didn't think it would even be visible yet. You know, I didn't think of the "Harry Potter closet" parallel, but you are right. I wonder what my subconscious was doing? An important difference between Tracey and Harry is that her parents DO love her. They are just worn down with adult worries, such as money, and don't realise that they are overlooking her. The story is finished, so I hope to move the chapters through the queue quickly. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. GhV