Hi there! I’m Soraya. I’m seventeen years old and am a proud Muslim British Bangladeshi. I live in East London and have loved reading and writing from a young age. I’m rather obsessed with Harry Potter (aren’t we all?), tea (not a surprise considering I’m a Brit) and good grammar. Recently, I've also got into the Supernatural fandom. After watching the first episode, I had already fallen head over heels in love with Sam Winchester, so it's no surprise that I am now a huge SPN fangirl as well as a Potterhead.
My writing has changed quite a bit over the years, and I think you'll probably notice that, the further down my author page you go, the more the quality seems to drop :P I started posting stories on here at the age of fourteen, and at nearly eighteen, I can see how much my writing has improved since those Dark Ages. So, for that reason, I would advise you stick to the more recent stuff, if you choose to read anything of mine.
Just so you know, these are posted firstly according to what kind of pairing, if any, is in the story, and then in chronological order in accordance to my own canon, not necessarily the order in which they were posted.
My first chaptered fic. It’s terribly written, but I still have a place in my heart for it because of how much fun it was to write. This story has now been deleted on MNFF, but if you really, really want to read it, you can still find it on FF.net and HPFF. (I advise you don't, though :P)
Second Childishness and Mere Oblivion (James/Lily)
Written for Round One (Major Characters) of Madam Pomfrey’s Character Clinic Triathlon, this one-shot is about James and Lily’s relationship getting rockier and rockier after they left Hogwarts, especially when Lily is faced with the trials of being a wife and motherhood. A little smutty.
My Love is Always Here (James/Lily)
This was a belated birthday present for the wonderful Gina/Gmariam, aka the queen of James/Lily. This is mostly about Lily dealing with becoming a mother for the first time and the problems (as well as the joys) that come with that.
There's an Answer (Remus/Tonks)
Written for Sophie/The owl for SPEW Summer Swap IV. Tonks is sent on an interesting baby Auror assignment to do with werewolves. Remus and a dangerous Muggle are thrown into the mix, with interesting results.
Left Behind (Remus/Tonks)
An expanded version of one of my LoveNotes, written for SPEW. It's a missing moment set between OOTP and HBP, where in my head canon Remus and Tonks have been together, in secret, for a few weeks already and Remus is then told to go on his werewolf mission. Slightly smutty.
One and Only (Remus/Tonks)
Written for the lovely Alex/Ithinkrabis2people in the Ravenclaw Christmas Drabble Exchange. This is a missing moment set just after Tonks’s outburst to Remus in the hospital wing at the end of HBP.
Out of My Life (Harry/Ginny)
My only AU (kind of). I tweaked a small part of canon in this -- basically, Harry actually said goodbye to Ginny properly when he broke up with her. Very angsty, and this is only up for sentimental reasons, as I wrote it during The Dark Ages (aka when I was fourteen).
A Different Kind of Magic (Harry/Ginny)
Written for the You’re Having My Baby challenge at SIYE. Ginny finds out she’s pregnant, but Harry receives the news before her and therefore has to tell his wife. This was my first ever story at MNFF. It was written when I was thirteen, and it definitely shows.
A Different Kind of Magic 2: Parenthood (Harry/Ginny)
A sequel, obviously, to A Different Kind of Magic. Ginny goes into labour, and both Harry and Ginny realise what it means to be parents. Again, this was written from Back in the Days.
The Caustic Ticking of the Clock (Rowena/Helga)
Written for the Great Hall Cotillion, this story is my only Founders story so far, and it’s about Rowena and Helga’s secret relationship. I am proud of this one, which doesn’t usually happen :)
Catching Fire (James/Sirius)
This was written for SPEW 007. My prompt was “Embers”, and it’s set just after Remus’s second transformation with the Marauders. James is badly injured, and he and Sirius realise, inadvertently, that they might just have feelings for each other. I like the pairing but still think the story needs work. One day I will go back and edit.
Flicker and Fail (Katie/Leanne)
This was written forSecret SPEW, and my recipient was the absolutely fabulous Alex/welshdevondragon. It’s my take on Leanne and Katie’s relationship from way before they were even at Hogwarts as well as what eventually happens to Katie in HBP, when she was cursed.
Skinny Love (Louis/Lily)
Written for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion. Set during Teddy and Victoire's wedding, Louis helps Lily come to terms with her bulimia. This one was pretty difficult to write.
Blood and Roses (Scorpius/Rose, Scorpius/Dominique, Dominique/OC)
Written for the Great Hall Mysterious Maychallenge, this was my first Next Generation fic about Scorpius, mostly, and the trials he faces after his daughter is murdered.
Broken Glass (Louis/Lily)
This is the story of when Loulily really began. After the deaths of his immediate family, Louis is finding it hard to cope, even six months later. Lily somehow helps. It’s a little smutty. I’m proud of this one, too :)
The Highway of Regret (Scorpius/Lily, Scorpius/Rose, Louis/Lily)
Also written for the Great Hall Cotillion. It’s my one and only Scily. This is all about secret relationships and mistakes people make. Lily’s angry at Louis, and Scorpius has just broken up with Rose; when Lily gets drunk in the pub, things... happen. :P
I Will Lay Down My Heart (Albus/Rose, Scorpius/Rose)
Written for Round Two (Minor Characters) of Madam Pomfrey’s Character Clinic Triathlon. Albus has been in love with Rose for years, but what happened with them when they were younger has put a dent in their relationship. It doesn’t help that Rose is actually in love with Scorpius, either. This is smutty too.
One More Night (Albus/Rose, Rose/Scorpius)
Companion piece to I Will Lay Down My Heart. This goes into more detail about Rose and Albus's changing relationship as well as the aftermath of the events in said companion story. Probably the smuttiest thing on my page. :D Written for the Great Hall Cotillion 2013.
This was written for the Great Hall-iday challenge for the Operation: Mistletoe prompt, and this was where my love for Loulily began.
This is about how five men in Potterverse dealt with remorse in different ways.
This poem is about how Remus feels about Sirius (not slashy, btw).
Written for the Magic in Music challenge over inPoetry, Anyone? This was set to the track “Obliviate” in DH1 and is about Hermione modifying her parents’ memories.
Written for the Goodbyechallenge in Poetry, Anyone? This was about saying goodbye, and how difficult it could be.
After All This Time
Written for the Deathly Hallows challenge inPoetry, Anyone?. I ship unrequited Snape/Lily, and this is probably the only time Snape will be on my author page, lol.
Written for the MC Kreacher challenge inPoetry, Anyone? This was written from the POV of Bill Weasley after his wife’s death.
Written for the Great Bannermakers’ Hallchallenge. The banner I picked had Merope Gaunt on it, and it’s probably my darkest story; it’s definitely the only one to have a dubious consent warning. It’s about, as you might guess, the abuse Merope suffered from her father and brother.
In Care (Marlene/OC)
Marlene McKinnon, as a care kid, eventually falls in love with another care kid, Jamal Olawumi. But he's a Muggle, and keeping her world secret proves difficult. This is definitely a story I would like to revisit and tidy up.
Just Across the Bar (Sirius/Rosmerta)
Sirius is just about of age, but obviously Rosmerta has misgivings about having feelings for Sirius, who is still a student. Written for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion and also smutty.
Written for SPEW 007. My prompt was “Juggling”, and it’s just a silly piece of dialogue-only banter between Remus and Sirius. Sirius realises Remus likes Tonks, and he tries to persuade Remus to act on his feelings.
Hanging by a Thread (Katie/Oliver)
Written for the lovely Jess/ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor for Secret SPEW VII. Katie is grieving and drowning her sorrows in alcohol and Oliver is trying his best to save Muggles, while trying also to bury feelings for Katie that he thought he had long since forgotten about. There is also, surprise surprise, some smut in this.
And that’s it! Along with being a moderator, I’m also a member of SPEWand SBBC. I hope to see you around on the forums; feel free to contact me via PM or review if you have any questions or comments about my stories!
Yeah, I had a feeling that would be McLaggen's secret :D And what Harry said at the end made me laugh so much -- I'm sure Hermione finding out Zach and Mac are together is one awkward turtle, lol. And that was nice work on Scorpius's part, getting Zach to see Cormac being held in custody.
Anyway, I'm not too sure Proudfoot is the informant anymore... argh, I used to be really good at guessing mysteries, but I guess I'm getting rusty as it's been a while since I've read one. I think there's more to Montague's story with sally-Ann, but hopefully when they interview Zac and Mac they'll get more details. That is, assuming they don't both do a bunk together... but I don't think that will happen, ha.
Right, rambly reviews over! Sorry if none of them make sense -- I am soooo rusty reviewing and a mystery as gripping as this one is bound to leave me incoherent. Well done, Croll, and post the next chapter soooooon!
Author's Response: I cannot resist the zacmackery anymore - Mwahahahahahahaha. Okay Ch 15 should be up very soon and 16 as have them both beta'd and just tweaking. The rest is being written. This is skeltering towards a conclusion, just need to time to get it all down - eeeep.
Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu ~Carole~
Flail flail flail FLAIL
carole did you know that I think you're amazing? Because I totally do :D I'm on my phone in Sweden at the moment and am about to go to bed, but I'd thought I'd review just to say that I have thoroughly enjoyed the ride with scorpy so far and am really looking forward to where things are going to head later on. Btw I have read the next chapter - I just was appalled at one chapter not having any so I thought I would review :3
Honestly, I could go on forever about how amazing this is but I'm not quite surer where to start. There are so many excellent characters in this - scorpius and James and harry and Lily - they were all characterised beautifully and I love the whole murder mystery going on here. I'm really intrigued although I don't think it's mclaggen - possibly zacharias or else someone else mclaggen slept with. Hmm. Anyway I can't wait for tar next chapter :D oh and happy early birthday! One of these days, you're going to fess up and tell me your real age... muabahhahahaha
Heart youuuuu soraya x
Author's Response: Thank youuuuuuu. yayay, this is such a lovely review, and I'm so pleased you're enjoying the story. I need to get cracking on finishing it. I keep saying it will be another three chapters, but then I said that about High (which was supposed to be 3 in total - ha ha - and ended up at 22.)
,br> Hope Sweden is fabulous. ~Carole~ (Oh, I'm 93, btw)
Yay, a welcome breather to all the mystery and action. I think it was necessary to have a filler chapter here, and it didn't even feel like that because you just write so well :)
I think you did a great job of portraying Scorpius's relationship with his family, especially with his dad. I like that nothing is perfect here particularly bearing in mind how everything is far from easy with Narcissa and everything.
And yayay Daphne! :D I do love how you've written her here. Oh and the present from Lily was so sweet. As was the appearance of Teddy. Sorry, I realise my review is steadily worsening and probably doesn't make much sense -- basically I enjoyed this a lot and I can't wait for the next chapter :D How many more chapters do you plan it to be? (And I totally get that that can change -- I mean remember my Sirius/Rosmerta had an accidental second chapter, lol)
Well done! :D
Author's Response: An accidental chapter I could deal with ... ha ha ha. Soraya, my love, I'm not sure. I've written chapter 11 and I'm definitely past the middle. I'm think 15/16, but need to make sure all the ends are tied up.
Thank you so much for the review. I have loved writing this story (so far) not just because it's Scorpius/Lily but because I've moved away from straight romance and into a plotty fic. And thank you for appreciating that the chapter was breather. It is necessary for the story (pssst, there's some information hidden there somewhere - mwahahahahah) but also it's part of Scorpius's story to show the interaction with his mum and dad.
Thank youuyuuuuuu and I hope you enjoy the rest Carole
Yayayyayayay. I've always been familiar with the lyrics of this song but have never actually listened to it, so I hunted down the Glee version on YouTube and put it on as I was reading. And I giggled at the hints of Remus/Sirius (oh, them two are just soo sneaky lolol) and definitely approved of how well you mixed the lyrics into the story. Really well done, Gina. I have a weird liking for love-related magic (like, I was reading a lovely Sirius/Remus where Sirius was under the influence of Amortentia, which was rather fun) when the two participants do actually like each other, too, especially when it kind of pushes them into doing what they normally wouldn't do because of whatever reason. (I have no idea if this makes any sense, lol.)
I love your effortless hold on these two -- even after binge-reading James/Sirius and James/Remus, I still adore James/Lily when done well, and of course you did it extremely well, just like you always do because you are Teh Queen of All Things Jily :D Anyway, this is an awful review, but your story was lovely and has cheered me up a lot :)
Author's Response: A very belated thank you, Soraya! I'm so glad this cheered you up at the time, and really appreciate your lovely compliments. I'm also glad you listened to the Glee version, because that is my favorite of all and that totally inspired this. And yes! The hints of Remus/Sirius, hahahaha! I had fun with this, tough as it was. Thank you again for the wonderful review! ~Gina :)
Hello, Maple! :)
Well, I have to say, even if I hadn’t been your Secret SPEW recipient, I would have featured this anyway, because I enjoyed reading this story so much. There was a lot that I loved about it, including Louis and Lily’s characterisations, the style and just how convincing their romance was. When I first read it, I was really pleased to see the inclusion of so many of my prompts, especially the lyrics, but also the tea and honey, which gave the story such a comforting and homey feel to it.
I love the way you set the scene in this story, with the rain and lightning. Not only did this give your story a really British feel (since all we ever talk about is the weather!), I also thought it added a bittersweet tone to it, and considering the issues Lily has with Sean and the open ending, I felt that was very fitting. I think the thunder and the rain were perfect in representing Lily’s conflicting emotions and her fieriness, which is definitely one of my favourite character traits in Lily. As well as this, the setting emphasised the hurt/comfort elements in the fic, which I thought was really important in creating chemistry between Louis and Lily, like the fact that Lily had gone to Louis twice in a month about her boyfriend already. There was something really endearing about Lily relying so much on Louis without necessarily realising it :)
Your use of detail is what I think set Louis apart from Sean and is definitely what made Louis’s characterisation so strong throughout. I liked that Louis seemed bookish and that you showed rather than told that through him enjoying a book; it was a great way of establishing the foundations of his character and making him so very likeable. Also, the motif of tea and honey (a lovely combination, may I add), really highlighted how considerate Louis was compared to Sean, especially as Louis always makes it right and Sean doesn’t. The pairing was set up so well in that way, particularly, again, how Lily seemed to subconsciously appreciate Louis.
The character who was the most fleshed out and felt the most human to me, though, was Lily. It’s interesting that Lily had insecurities about being built like a guy -- I don’t think I’ve ever come across that in fanfic before, or in OF, for that matter, but it definitely fits, given she’s a Quidditch player. Speaking of Quidditch, I thought the way you weaved that into the plot was really well done, and it also said a lot about Lily’s character that she was always blaming herself for losing. There was a vulnerability about her that you caught so incredibly well in that, and it reminded me of Harry being maligned in a similar way by Cormac. For that reason, of all the Lily-centric stories of yours that I’ve read, this one is by far my favourite, because I could so clearly see Lily’s weaknesses and her inferiority complex, and this resonated with me so much.
That said, it was great that the story also had light moments and sexy moments, too. Lily being drunk definitely brought out the feelings in her that I don’t think she would have acted on otherwise, and with regards to style, her drunken dialogue was spot on, particularly Lily saying,“Hello yourself, handsome”; the line was funny, but it was also clear just how much Lily must have had to drink to be that brazen. Also, I have to say, that whole scene in the shower was very convincing! I loved how it was never smutty or graphic but was still incredibly sensual purely because of the situation they were both in (particularly Louis’s lack of attire). The unresolved sexual tension in the scene after Lily had cooled off also brought out how caring Louis was, to the point where he refused to take advantage of her. Your characterisation of him was fabulous.
This is my favourite story of yours, Maple, by far. I agree with another reviewer, though, that a sequel would be lovely, because I really want to know if they have a relationship, and I would love to know how they get there if they do, so I will have to keep my eyes peeled! Excellent work.
Author's Response: Thanks for the amazing review! I love how you found some interesting symbolic thing for the thunderstorm. That was really just me experimenting with description, but I'm glad it worked none the less :) I am so glad you liked the characterisation of Lily. To a certain extent, I was worried that she was coming across as super melodramatic and unrealistic, so I'm really glad that worked. Eep, I'm so glad this went over so well with you, especially given how unsure of it I was. As for a sequel...I have no idea how that would go ahaha :) Maple
Croll! Ooooh it’s been so long since I’ve reviewed you D: I still have your High sequel to review, and I will do once these gorram mock exams are over, promise.
Anyway, I rather enjoyed plot-hashing with Jess over her Drarry and then reading it, so I was really interested in seeing what you would do with yours. I think Drarry is a really subjective pairing that, despite its popularity, doesn’t always work/requires one or both characters being at least a little OOC for there to be the required chemistry. Well, that’s what I always thought before Alex and Jess proved me wrong :P Aaaand I'm sure you will, too. (I’m writing this review as I go, btw.)
I love the nod to Theo/Justin (Thrustin? XD) here :) It was a nice way to begin the story and I like the idea that Justin would want to, as you so eloquently put it, sew up the tears in magical society. And I giggled at the costume party bit. I also thought it was good of Harry not to be too judgmental of Theo for who his father was/his house.
Everyone wanted to play Father Christmas and bring some jollity into his life, unable to accept that although he was alone, he wasn’t often lonely.
That was a great way of expressing Harry’s mindset. I totally get where he’s coming from -- just because he’s alone doesn’t mean he’s lonely. Also, :( at Harry/Ginny not being Harry/Ginny anymore but yayyyy to Dean/Ginny! :D I really like how Harry and Ginny seem to have split fairly amicably.
LOL -- Harry as a vampire! Oh, that made me giggle so much. And I'm glad Justin made it clear that Theo wasn’t a bad person or anything just because he’s Slytherin; it’s also definitely IC of Harry to have a slight distrust despite everything, but yay to Justin making things clear with Harry anyway.
On another note, Justin is so adorable in how bloody posh he is, lol. It’s strangely endearing and I think you’ve done a brilliant job of his characterisation.
Lavenderrrrrrr yayayayayy I love her costume. There’s something really creative about her here that makes her instantly likeable (of course, she’s already likeable to me, but you just make her even more likeable ;) ) and that was great use of the whole Flame-Freezing thing -- I love how you can find little details in the books that most people forget and make it your own, Croll. Wonderfully done.
“Is Pansy Parkinson here?” he wondered out loud.
Lavender pulled a face and helped herself to a vol-au-vent. “Not seen her, but then I haven’t really been looking. Godric, Harry, please don’t tell me you’re about to rebound into her arms; that would be ...” She shuddered.
Hahahahahahahaha. I have actually read a couple of good Harry/Pansys, but I do love it when a ship is joked about in a fic, hehe.
And ooooh you had Draco and Pansy engaged? Interesting. Yay to Draco breaking it off, though, because that means he can shag Harryyyyyy lol.
Awwwww Harry raising his glass to Dean was nice. NGL, for no reason whatsoever, I felt a bit wibbly when Harry said “Dean’s a mate”. Maybe it’s just my Harry/Ginny feels (yeah, apparently I still have them D:) or something. But yeah, great line. :)
Nooooooo I feel so sorry for Harry after he walked in on Dean and Ginny :( Oh, Croll, you’re making me have all these feeeeels.
OMG I had no idea this story would be so angsty! Not in a bad way -- not at all, because you write it so well -- but I kind of thought this would just be a bit of a laugh, nothing more. Oh, how wrong I was. Poor Draco.
Speaking of which, he’s pretty damn smexy. Even in a pirate outfit, lol. No wonder Harry fancies him, hehehehe.
Yayyyyyyyy those are my favourite Drarry lines EVER. Great use of them without it seeming to be shoehorned in or anything. :D
I also think their competitiveness and the inclusion of Quidditch is what makes this so, so canonically accurate and in character the whole time. I love Draco’s snarkiness throughout; his jibes against Ron stop him from being completely redeemed, and yet I can definitely see that he’s not as bad a person as Draco-bashers make him out to be. I’m glad you got him bang in the middle, because your characterisation of him is perfect. :)
“No doubt it surprises you, Potter, but I believe in fidelity. My parents may not be ideal in your eyes, but they never strayed from each other. And that’s how I was brought up. I wasn’t with Pansy when I met Marcus, and it had ended a long time before I got back together with her.”
I love this. There’s so much said about Draco’s character and his morals here, and again, you’ve redeemed him, I think.
And yayyyayyyyyy they KISSED! Woooooot! I'm glad Draco stopped and that Harry finally admitted his obsession with Malfoy was more than just an obsession. And the smut (well, kind of, haha). Aaaah I always have found Drarry hot, and it certainly was here. The morning after scene gave the story closure, particularly Draco’s conversation with Walburga.
Anyway, apologies for such a rambly review, and for the definitely non-SPEWness of it, hehe. This was a fabulous story, Croll, which I thoroughly enjoyed. Now I think I might be off to find some Drarry art on tumblr because you have just made me ship them pretty damn hard. :D
Author's Response: Thank you for the review! It's so fabulous to wake up to something so comprehensive. Personally I love stream of conscious reviews because they make me giggle at the unfolding plot.
I'm glad you liked the lines about Lucius/Narcissa being faithful to each other. They get a bad rep in fanfiction - mostly deserved - but really there was nothing to suggest that they were unfaithful to each other, it's just that people don't like them.
I take it the angst line in your review was when Draco jumped - heh heh. I really had fun with that bit because I knew he was never going to jump. Slyths have a strong urge for self-preservation after all.
I debated about using Dean as Ginny's new bloke because this isn't a follow up to the other story, but I couldn't really think who else to pair her with (I did think of Oliver at one point). In the end I went with Dean because they had history, but also I needed someone we knew she could get passionate with so it basically emphasised the fact that her and Harry towards the end had been flat. :( Ilove Harry and Ginny, but I can't see them as passionate together. No real idea why but possibly because they've known each other for so long and since they were kids.
I had a much more explicit scene in mind when I originally wrote this story, but as I got towards that bit I decided I wanted it to be more subtle. I'm glad you still thought it was hot.
Soraya, thank you again for the review. Greatly appreciated (Oh and check out 'chosenprat' on tumblr for Drarry art, she has a whole blog dedicated to them :D)
Hi Carole :)
What a fabulous story! I remember you saying on LJ that you weren’t sure about it, but honestly, you shouldn’t be so worried, because I’ve enjoyed reading this so far and think you deserve far more reviews. I’ve read quite a few Flonks stories before, and I can say with certainty that this is the best one I’ve ever read. What I love about your writing is how you make characters who are often heavily abused in the fandom, like Fleur (but also Lavender and Romilda), likeable and human, in spite of her Veela heritage. And, having read both Fleur and Tonks in your writing before (in Coup de Foudre and Apparently Asleep respectively), it was no surprise to me that they were both characterised incredibly well here, too, and that their characters, above all, were what pushed the story forward.
First, though, the style of this story was one of its many strengths; it was dialogue-heavy, and it worked because of the French accent, which was never distracting but only added to Fleur’s character. I especially liked her mistakes in English, such as when she says “feetsteps”, and her misunderstandings of English sayings, like “taking the mick” and “scrapes”. It was funny and realistic, with the snippets of French making Fleur’s English sound really broken. There was also something really sweet about Tonks correcting Fleur when she did slip up in English which made Tonks’s character even more caring and brought out her Hufflepuff qualities.
I loved just how vulnerable Fleur appeared in this. While I think she put on a front of fussiness and perfection in GoF, I agreed with Tonks in that it was a relief that Fleur was “Flesh and bones like the rest of us”. That was a great line, and the fact that Fleur was doubting her own capabilities and also had insecurities, like her thoughts about her so-called friends, made her much more of a sympathetic character. She’s a lot more relatable here than in canon, and I could understand why she wanted someone who would disagree with her and tease her, something that Roger clearly is not. I was also reminded of how young Fleur is in this, by her having the same worries any normal teenager would have about her friends distancing themselves from her and Fleur perhaps not fitting in much, in spite of her beauty. I can remember you saying something about how sexuality can be really fluid at a younger age, and I guess that’s true for Fleur, because her attraction to Tonks as “Edwin” doesn’t seem to go even when she finds out Tonks is really a woman.
Speaking of which, I wasn’t sure “Edwin” was Tonks at first, but it was confirmed when she made the comment about Cleaning Spells. I think that’s a mark of how convincing Fleur’s narrative was (even in the third person), because I was never completely sure it was Tonks until she finally revealed herself. And her characterisation was so spot on, exactly like Tonks was in canon -- I liked her sheepish comment after Fleur first kissed her: “Er, well, you started it, but ... er... yeah ... sorry.” There’s something so unapologetic and cheeky about your Tonks that I couldn’t help but laugh, because I think it’s just like Tonks to point out that Fleur was the one who started it and for her to find the situation funny more than anything. But at the same time, Tonks was thoughtful, too, particularly through her gesture of giving Fleur the salve for the dragon task. Also, I really liked the moment when Tonks morphed into Bellatrix and explained how good looks didn’t necessarily mean anything; it reminded me of how Tonks clearly had issues, too, with her own family. Like Fleur, that kind of imperfection is what makes Tonks such a well-rounded character for me.
As for Roger, I liked that while he obviously wasn’t the right person for Fleur (the fumbling with the coffee, the fact that Fleur didn’t enjoy kissing him), he wasn’t painted as a bad person as such, which was a welcome change. For example, I liked that he kept trying to reassure her that she should have come first and that her dragon was the fiercest, even if Fleur might have wanted him to disagree with her a little more. I also thought it was interesting that Fleur, despite her incompatibility with him, still regarded him as “the one ally she seemed to have here”; the emphasis on her loneliness really brought out just how human Fleur was. I also thought Roger’s considerateness and effort in taking dancing lessons was actually rather endearing and made him likeable, in a way, so while I don’t ship them, I can see at least the initial attraction Fleur might have had with Roger.
Although your story was mostly character-driven, I liked how you weaved the plot in with GoF. I was able to follow the timeline really easily, especially with the inclusion of the Hogsmeade visit and then the first task, followed by the Yule Ball. I was intrigued, also, by Tonks’s assignment -- I was wondering how you would explain Tonks impersonating Savage -- but it made perfect sense to me, since she did say she was really good at concealment and disguise because she was a Metamorphmagus. I can definitely see that happening, and having read several gender bender SSP stories, I have to say that this is one of the most unique due in part to the lack of Polyjuice Potion.
I thought the two chapters flowed well, and I liked the slow progression of Fleur’s attraction to Tonks, starting with her attraction to who she thought was Edwin, especially with the opening image of the wizard eating the peach. It’s such a simple thing that drew Fleur to Tonks in the first place, even if she did think Tonks was a man, but it was also very sensual, and considering your qualms about if the story was sexy, I definitely think it was from the outset. The physical chemistry was evident from the start, as I think Tonks doesn’t act like a man at all (even if she isn’t particularly ladylike either), and I like that Fleur notices this, too, however subconscious those thoughts were to begin with -- like Tonks’s hand not being sweaty and her not kissing Fleur’s hand in the way I suspect a lot of guys probably did with Fleur. And when they finally kissed properly at the Yule Ball, it was amusing to see Fleur lose her cool a bit and at last voice her sustained attraction to Tonks, even knowing she was not Edwin.
Overall, Carole, I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. I would really love to know where things go from here, and I eagerly await the next chapter :)
Author's Response: I really should have replied to this a long long time ago, but I was, quite honestly, gobsmacked by the fabulousness of the review, so didn't know how to reply. Thank you so much for this, for as you know I have had huge issues with this which lead to me adding, deleting, then adding smut and then trying to keep it under the 15k (which it is - thankfully).
Thanks again. My response is inadequete, but I very much appreciate it. :) ~Carole~
Oooooooh! Lovely story, Nicole :D I'm reading this for SBBC, and I think I've reread three times now because the style was just that good. You have such a way with words, and the photos in this story were so vividly and beautifully illustrated by your rich use of language.
But at the same time, I also think you really captured Dennis's voice here. I could practically hear him narrating the story, and I could tell how much he missed his brother :( I love Dennis as a character, having read a couple of excellent stories featuring him (as well as this one, of course :) ), as I think Colin's death was really significant in DH for Harry alone -- and here I could see how much it affected his brother, too.
My favourite section was definitely the end one, especially because of that last line where he points out where Colin is in the picture. Gahhh. A lovely end to a fab story. Well done :)
Author's Response: Soraya! ♥
Gaaah, what a fabulous review! Thank you SO MUCH! I'm so flattered at all the wonderful compliments you left. I'm really glad you thought the photos were vivid; there is a lot of clutter in it, a lot of unnecessary detail because Dennis sort of notices them.
And Dennis! :( I'm very fond of him as a character as well. Such a sad story, the Creeveys. I'm glad you thought Dennis' voice was clear and well-written!
Thank you so much once again for this lovely review, Soraya! It's absolutely made my day! ♥♥
I love this! :D It takes a HELL of a lot to be able to convince a reader of a pairing when you show one half of hte pairing being so much older while teh other half is still a baby (not sure if that makes sens,e lol), and in second person, no less!
My favourite line is "So? She's hot". I'm not sure why -- I love how colloquial it sounds but at the same time shows the height of Teddy'sn attraction to Lily. I think the slow progression of this attraction was done so well by dividing the story into sections the way you did, and I liked the end result (well, of course I would, hehe). I would love to read a companion piece to this, though, bcause I want to see the rest of the family's reactions! Fab fic, Maple. :D
Author's Response: Heehee, thanks for the review, Soraya, it totally made me giggle! I am so glad that second person worked - it's such a scare to try and use it lol. Family reactions, huh? That would make a fab fic! ~Maple
Written for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion by Acacia Carter of Hufflepuff.
EEEEEEEEEEEE! You, my dear, have the unfair advantage of making any slashy pairing totally UNF even though we don’t get to see any yummy action. How do you do it? Because this is so fabulous, Jamie, and you really do need to have more faith in yourself because I really enjoyed it :)
Hahahaha, Luna is just hilarious and very much in character with her eagle eye intuition; I love how bluntly she just said that Neville didn’t like girls. Aah, that still makes me giggle.
And AWWWW NEVILLE IS SO ADORABLE. (I don’t even care that I’m shoving capitals at you, lol -- it's your own fault for writing such a squee-worthy story :P) That bit where he smiles shyly is so cute. And Oliver is totes UNF. Seriously. (Well, naturally, he would be, but he’s even more hot in this story for some reason. Great job :D) I like how they both kind of hesitated about how long they’ve known each other and how they’re pretty much polar opposites, since Neville doesn’t fly and Oliver is obsessed with it. Ooh, and I love the detail about Neville falling off his broom -- that is something I didn’t really think about, but yeah, that explains why Neville doesn’t like flying.
Mmm, I hate to be a canon nut, but I do have a slight quibble about Neville having never met Oliver -- they seemed to have been bringing in bodies from the grounds together, if I remember correctly, so they must have been at least a little acquainted with each other (insofar that they would have had a conversation at least). Just something I thought I should mention.
Heehehehehehe, the tattoo! :D Gah, that just makes Oliver even smexier, damn it. And awww, Neville made tea, bless him.
And yaaaaaaaaay, Neville finally worked up the courage to kiss him :D Aww, that was a really lovely ending to a fabulous story that I thoroughly enjoyed! I apologise for the complete and utter lack of professionalism in this review, but it’s your fault for writing them so well, lady. :P Well done!
This is Eleanor Lupin of Hufflepuff writing for the 2013 Great Hall Valentine's Day Cotillion!
Awww, this was so sad, Nora! D: But it was so well-written, too. Well done on a strong fic -- you had nothing to worry about, by the way, because I would never have guessed taht this was your first SSP. I thought you did a fabulous job of putting across unrequited love in this fic. I also can definitely see how Eloise may have misconstrued Hannah's words, which just makes it even sadder :(
But I think your biggest strength in this fic is the imagery -- it;s not necessarily poetic in all places, but the images you create are so strong and make the story all the more vivid. I think you did a great job in getting into Eloise's mindset and establishing her voice here, too, and I just hope she finds someone who loves her back one day, because I do like your portrayal of her. Excellent fic, dear!
Author's Response: Sorayaaaa <3 Thank you so much! I'm SO glad you liked this. Writing it even made ME a little sad, actually! I'm glad that Eloise's voice worked. In the future I think I'll write something else that gives her a happier ending - there's a couple of characters who I think I could see her with in her future. Again, thanks for the review. :) ~Nora
OOOOOOOOOOOH This is so intriguing, Gina! :D This won't be very long, but I think you've got a fantastic setup here, with a lovely action/adventure type feel and yet retaining the romance element that you do so damn well with this pairing in particular. I love Lily's characterisation, especially her refusal to call James James -- but then her weakness by having trouble with banishing Boggarts. I know we talked about this, so it's familiar to me, but anyway, if you had any issues, they really don't show here because I thought you've done a brilliant job in this first chapter. Now, onwards and upwards! :)
Author's Response: Thank you for the review, Soraya! I'm so glad you'll still come by to read some J/L, heh heh. And I'm glad you found the beginning interesting enough. Thanks so much for talking things out with me, it really helped! ~Gina :)
Yayayayay, I think you did a another great job with this chapter ;) I love how James and Lily bonded here and managed to teach each other things, and I think it's great how they managed to overcome the obstacles in the maze. and I knwo it's not really mentioned here but I love teh idea of this being Rowena's maze. my main quetion is if there is soemthing of value in the middle and whether or not this is going to be retrieved. I shall have to wait and see! And I love the whole thing about Lily finding out about James being an Animagus -- very well done :D
Author's Response: Thank youuuuu! I had so much fun with the Animagus bit. I don't think I'll ever get tired of that, you know? I'll just keep writing different ways until JKR gives us the real story and then I'll cry. Haha. They did bond here, that was sort of the point working up to the end. As for the middle of the maze - heh heh, I had fun with that. Thanks so much!! ~Gina :)
It wasn't that strange! I loved Dumbledore and I think you did a great job of giving James and Lily the closure they needed, both in terms of what they needed to do and with regards to their romance :D And I think there was a very Potterish feel to it because they were in a weird situation and were then saved (kind of?) by Dumbledore.
Anyway, these reviews are pretty useless, lol, but I basically enjoyed this story quite a bit, so well done! :)
Author's Response: Thank you once more! I'm glad you enjoyed the story. I still think it's out there, but hey, I've written J/L every which way under the sun so I have to try something different, lol. I could just picture Dumbledore knowing about this and talking them through it with his twinkling eyes, can't you? And I have no doubt Rowena has this secret room in her castle too. Gah, I love these two. Too much. Thank you for reading, I really appreciate the reviews!! ~Gina :)
Fabulous chapter, Croll! I am enjoying this so much and am sad to see it nearly finished :( Gahh this is definitely one of my favouritest stories by you (I know I say this about a LOT of your stuff but damn it it's your fault for writing so well!) mainly because the characterisation of everyone present is just perfect. I love Oliver and his thoughtfulness, and I love Charity for how she very clearly has tried to shake off her feelings for Oliver but isn't able to. And I really liked how, despite Charity not really being interested in Quidditch, Oliver still thanked her for everything. She sounds like a fabulous teacher. :)
That's it, I think! Sorry for the awful review -- my brain is kinda fried right now, eep. But I look forward to the next chapter!
Oh, actually, one more thing.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE COW BISCUITS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Author's Response: COW BISCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUIIIIITTTTS! Hahahahahah, thank you so much for the review. I have adored writing this story and tried not to self insert, but the cow biscuits were too wonderful to ignore. ~Croll~
Carole, this was really interesting! :) Honestly, I expected the usual scenario (or at least what seems to be the usual scenario) of a teacher giving a student detention and then something going on there. This was therefore very unexpected in a good way :)
Charity is a lovely teacher! I would love to have been taught by her -- I think you did a great job in making her a really likeable and well-rounded character. Also, I giggled at Professor Sinistra's comment about not smiling till Christmas :P
And poor Oliver :( I can see how this kind of classroom discussion could get nasty, even if it is a really interesting discussion they got into. I think the way you presented a classroom situation and kept it so engaging with teh dialogue was fabulous, especially the things they were learning in Muggle Studies, because that's one subject I've always been curious about. I think you did a great job with that, and I liked Oliver's appreciation of Shakespeare in particular ;)
Anyway, I would love to see where things go from here, Croll! :D This was a great start, and I am intrigued, especially as this is when Oliver is in fourth year -- I'm guessing anything that happens with them would probably take place when he's at least a little older? Anyway, update soon, and once again, YAYYYY COW BISCUITS :D
Author's Response: Cow Biscuits to you, too.
Soraya, thank you so much for the review. Hmm, I wanted to write this as a teacher/student that's as unsquicky as possible. Basically everyone seems to think of the Snape and someone, but the female teachers could have been as young as I've made Charity, and it's not entirely squicky if the boy is of age, in my opinion. I also decided a long time ago that this wouldn't be a kept in detention accidentally brewing Love Potions scenario - ha ha ha. Thanks again ~Carole~
Oliver is so hot. I love him. *heart* I think you did a great job here, Croll -- I particularly like how Charity's attraction to Oliver is very much a gradual thing and she didn't think of him in *that* way until now. Also, I was so ready to call you out on the Apparating thing -- lol -- but then it was a dream! Hehehehe.
Seriously, though, I am enjoying this so much, Carole! Only you could make me root for a student/teacher pairing -- I mean, I have nothing against it in the slightest, but I generally find the fandom!student/teacher consists of Snape putting Hermione, Luna or Ginny in detention and then he shags them with teh cauldron bubbling in hte background or something, lolol. This is far more plausible.
Well done and update soooooon! :D
Author's Response: Yayayayayay - thank you for the compliments; it means so much to me that you think this plausible. Yes, the detention thing is a little overused, and speaking personally, even with seven lovepotions, a locked dungeon, and the threat of Crucio, I still couldn;t fancy Snivellus - hahahaha.
Ha - I knew I'd have to mention the Apparating thing because someone would have read Hogwarts: A History and will be picky - hee hee - but I suspect Charity caught up in the throes of passion would have forgotten all about it.
Thank youuuuu! ~Carole~
Yayayayayayayayay,that was fab! :D :D :D
Gina, I know you had trouble with this, but honestly, I really enjoyed this final chapter, even though I knew the plot twist and everything. (Kind of reminds me of the fact that I could still watch Being Human after spoiling myself, hehe.) And speaking of Being Human, I absolutely loved the whole thing about passing over and all that. Graham came full circle and finally accepted his fate, which I think you needed. I think teh reason this story ended so satisfactorily was because you gave Graham closure. Well done on an excellent story and a really powerful ending. :D
Author's Response: Thank you so much! Yes, another story we talked about and I spoiled you on but you helped me so much so thank you for that and for reading it and for reviewing it! I really appreciate all your help. I'm glad you enjoyed it and found it worked well enough. Definitely has that Being Human vibe at the end, I think. It was fun to write until I got stuck, lol but I'm glad the end was effective. Thanks again for everything! ~Gina :)
I am Padfoot11333 of Hufflepuff and this is my second entry for the Great Hall Cotillion.
Ooooh, interesting story, Lily! :)
I love pretty much any trio era minor character pairing; this was an excellent example of one, and I liked the dialogue between Ernie and Lisa. I thought there was quite a bit of physicality in their relationship which really helped in developing it and making them have good chemistry, and I liked how sparingly you used the lyrics, too.
the one thing I will say is that I do think it's a bit short. For me, Ithink you could have expanded things, extended the timeline, because I feel the characters didn't quite get the closure they needed. I also think it would be good to develop their relationship furhter. Just a thought -- I've noticed this in a couple of stories, not just this one, so I thought I would point it out. :)
Anyway, I did enjoy this. Good lukc with teh cotillion and sorry for typos -- this is why I shouldn't review late at night :3
Hey Pooja! So I am slowly working my way through the Cotillion fics, and when I came across yours, I'll admit that I was wondering how you could make the pairing work, because I've never come across Cedric/Penelope before. But I did like your take on it, and I think it was plausible, especially after what we see of Percy in GoF.
I really liked Penelope's characterisation here. I think you got into her head really well -- from the start, when Cedric died, I could definitely feel her grief at what just happened. It makes me sad to see their relationship was basically non-existent in the end :( It shouldn't have been, but at the same time, I get why they weren't together in the end. That is one thing I really like about this story, Pooja: it's realistic, with a plausible ending, and I'm glad you went down that route because it worked really well for you. I think it also showed Cedric's imperfections, and that's important -- if I remember correctly, you were saying how you didn't like how perfect Cedric is in a lot of fanfic. I get that. I don't think you had that here at all, especially because he was the one who eventually turned Penelope down.
Anyway, this is an awful review, but I enjoyed this! Good luck with the Cotillion, my dear :)
Author's Response: Hellow, Soraya! So glad you stopped by. :D I have a lot of fics to read too, and it has been a busy month for me. But, haha, I was wondering how I'd make it work myself. I just had a set of situations that I wanted to write, and I had Cedric and Penelope. The entire Percy thing struck me right in the end, actually. :D
I am really, really glad that Penelope's characterisation agreed with you. I wanted to get her right -- I wanted her to be justified in liking Cedric, and also to like him for something apart from his looks. In the books, there's no mention of Cedric and Penelope even interacting, but I guess a story could be woven between them. They couldn't end-up together, of course, because we get to know later in the story that Cedric is with Cho. But then I noticed that automatically, it seemed that all the characters were concerned about how Cho was doing, which meant that even if Cedric did have another secret relationship with anyone else, we'd never know.
Cedric in the books comes across as perfect too, actually -- mainly because we see him from Harry's PoV, and Harry has a major complex there. This is misinterpreted in many fics as Cedric being perfect. But he couldn't possibly be that way. But I'm really happy that he comes off more realistically in this fic. :D
This is a perfectly fantabulous review, and thank you so much for this! :D Good luck to you too, and *hugs, hugs, hugsssss*