Hi there! I’m Soraya. I’m seventeen years old and am a proud Muslim British Bangladeshi. I live in East London and have loved reading and writing from a young age. I’m rather obsessed with Harry Potter (aren’t we all?), tea (not a surprise considering I’m a Brit) and good grammar. Recently, I've also got into the Supernatural fandom. After watching the first episode, I had already fallen head over heels in love with Sam Winchester, so it's no surprise that I am now a huge SPN fangirl as well as a Potterhead.
My writing has changed quite a bit over the years, and I think you'll probably notice that, the further down my author page you go, the more the quality seems to drop :P I started posting stories on here at the age of fourteen, and at nearly eighteen, I can see how much my writing has improved since those Dark Ages. So, for that reason, I would advise you stick to the more recent stuff, if you choose to read anything of mine.
Just so you know, these are posted firstly according to what kind of pairing, if any, is in the story, and then in chronological order in accordance to my own canon, not necessarily the order in which they were posted.
My first chaptered fic. It’s terribly written, but I still have a place in my heart for it because of how much fun it was to write. This story has now been deleted on MNFF, but if you really, really want to read it, you can still find it on FF.net and HPFF. (I advise you don't, though :P)
Second Childishness and Mere Oblivion (James/Lily)
Written for Round One (Major Characters) of Madam Pomfrey’s Character Clinic Triathlon, this one-shot is about James and Lily’s relationship getting rockier and rockier after they left Hogwarts, especially when Lily is faced with the trials of being a wife and motherhood. A little smutty.
My Love is Always Here (James/Lily)
This was a belated birthday present for the wonderful Gina/Gmariam, aka the queen of James/Lily. This is mostly about Lily dealing with becoming a mother for the first time and the problems (as well as the joys) that come with that.
There's an Answer (Remus/Tonks)
Written for Sophie/The owl for SPEW Summer Swap IV. Tonks is sent on an interesting baby Auror assignment to do with werewolves. Remus and a dangerous Muggle are thrown into the mix, with interesting results.
Left Behind (Remus/Tonks)
An expanded version of one of my LoveNotes, written for SPEW. It's a missing moment set between OOTP and HBP, where in my head canon Remus and Tonks have been together, in secret, for a few weeks already and Remus is then told to go on his werewolf mission. Slightly smutty.
One and Only (Remus/Tonks)
Written for the lovely Alex/Ithinkrabis2people in the Ravenclaw Christmas Drabble Exchange. This is a missing moment set just after Tonks’s outburst to Remus in the hospital wing at the end of HBP.
Out of My Life (Harry/Ginny)
My only AU (kind of). I tweaked a small part of canon in this -- basically, Harry actually said goodbye to Ginny properly when he broke up with her. Very angsty, and this is only up for sentimental reasons, as I wrote it during The Dark Ages (aka when I was fourteen).
A Different Kind of Magic (Harry/Ginny)
Written for the You’re Having My Baby challenge at SIYE. Ginny finds out she’s pregnant, but Harry receives the news before her and therefore has to tell his wife. This was my first ever story at MNFF. It was written when I was thirteen, and it definitely shows.
A Different Kind of Magic 2: Parenthood (Harry/Ginny)
A sequel, obviously, to A Different Kind of Magic. Ginny goes into labour, and both Harry and Ginny realise what it means to be parents. Again, this was written from Back in the Days.
The Caustic Ticking of the Clock (Rowena/Helga)
Written for the Great Hall Cotillion, this story is my only Founders story so far, and it’s about Rowena and Helga’s secret relationship. I am proud of this one, which doesn’t usually happen :)
Catching Fire (James/Sirius)
This was written for SPEW 007. My prompt was “Embers”, and it’s set just after Remus’s second transformation with the Marauders. James is badly injured, and he and Sirius realise, inadvertently, that they might just have feelings for each other. I like the pairing but still think the story needs work. One day I will go back and edit.
Flicker and Fail (Katie/Leanne)
This was written forSecret SPEW, and my recipient was the absolutely fabulous Alex/welshdevondragon. It’s my take on Leanne and Katie’s relationship from way before they were even at Hogwarts as well as what eventually happens to Katie in HBP, when she was cursed.
Skinny Love (Louis/Lily)
Written for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion. Set during Teddy and Victoire's wedding, Louis helps Lily come to terms with her bulimia. This one was pretty difficult to write.
Blood and Roses (Scorpius/Rose, Scorpius/Dominique, Dominique/OC)
Written for the Great Hall Mysterious Maychallenge, this was my first Next Generation fic about Scorpius, mostly, and the trials he faces after his daughter is murdered.
Broken Glass (Louis/Lily)
This is the story of when Loulily really began. After the deaths of his immediate family, Louis is finding it hard to cope, even six months later. Lily somehow helps. It’s a little smutty. I’m proud of this one, too :)
The Highway of Regret (Scorpius/Lily, Scorpius/Rose, Louis/Lily)
Also written for the Great Hall Cotillion. It’s my one and only Scily. This is all about secret relationships and mistakes people make. Lily’s angry at Louis, and Scorpius has just broken up with Rose; when Lily gets drunk in the pub, things... happen. :P
I Will Lay Down My Heart (Albus/Rose, Scorpius/Rose)
Written for Round Two (Minor Characters) of Madam Pomfrey’s Character Clinic Triathlon. Albus has been in love with Rose for years, but what happened with them when they were younger has put a dent in their relationship. It doesn’t help that Rose is actually in love with Scorpius, either. This is smutty too.
One More Night (Albus/Rose, Rose/Scorpius)
Companion piece to I Will Lay Down My Heart. This goes into more detail about Rose and Albus's changing relationship as well as the aftermath of the events in said companion story. Probably the smuttiest thing on my page. :D Written for the Great Hall Cotillion 2013.
This was written for the Great Hall-iday challenge for the Operation: Mistletoe prompt, and this was where my love for Loulily began.
This is about how five men in Potterverse dealt with remorse in different ways.
This poem is about how Remus feels about Sirius (not slashy, btw).
Written for the Magic in Music challenge over inPoetry, Anyone? This was set to the track “Obliviate” in DH1 and is about Hermione modifying her parents’ memories.
Written for the Goodbyechallenge in Poetry, Anyone? This was about saying goodbye, and how difficult it could be.
After All This Time
Written for the Deathly Hallows challenge inPoetry, Anyone?. I ship unrequited Snape/Lily, and this is probably the only time Snape will be on my author page, lol.
Written for the MC Kreacher challenge inPoetry, Anyone? This was written from the POV of Bill Weasley after his wife’s death.
Written for the Great Bannermakers’ Hallchallenge. The banner I picked had Merope Gaunt on it, and it’s probably my darkest story; it’s definitely the only one to have a dubious consent warning. It’s about, as you might guess, the abuse Merope suffered from her father and brother.
In Care (Marlene/OC)
Marlene McKinnon, as a care kid, eventually falls in love with another care kid, Jamal Olawumi. But he's a Muggle, and keeping her world secret proves difficult. This is definitely a story I would like to revisit and tidy up.
Just Across the Bar (Sirius/Rosmerta)
Sirius is just about of age, but obviously Rosmerta has misgivings about having feelings for Sirius, who is still a student. Written for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion and also smutty.
Written for SPEW 007. My prompt was “Juggling”, and it’s just a silly piece of dialogue-only banter between Remus and Sirius. Sirius realises Remus likes Tonks, and he tries to persuade Remus to act on his feelings.
Hanging by a Thread (Katie/Oliver)
Written for the lovely Jess/ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor for Secret SPEW VII. Katie is grieving and drowning her sorrows in alcohol and Oliver is trying his best to save Muggles, while trying also to bury feelings for Katie that he thought he had long since forgotten about. There is also, surprise surprise, some smut in this.
And that’s it! Along with being a moderator, I’m also a member of SPEWand SBBC. I hope to see you around on the forums; feel free to contact me via PM or review if you have any questions or comments about my stories!
Summary: A poem about the deaths of the Potters.
Hi, Meg :) I'm sorry for being such an absent SPEW buddy. Things have been so busy for me lately; I really haven't had much time on my hands.
You may or may not know that I normally am very snobby about poetry, and that I very rarely enjoy poetry that doesn’t rhyme in some way. Yet in your poem, the way you’ve structured it is ingenious, and I loved your minimalist approach to the words. The minimalism enhances the rawness of the feelings in the poem, and given that I have just written — essentially — James and Lily Potter’s deaths (in the epilogue of Checkmate), I understand how powerful the emotions there would be.
Your choice of words — “billows” and “blemishes” in particular stood out for me — were wonderful, and I really loved the lyricism in your poem. My only criticism, really, is that it could have been longer. I honestly felt like you described the emotions so well, and the whole premise of the poem is brilliant, but at the same time, there is something... unfinished about the poem. I think, perhaps, if you expand it a little, it will have more of a completed feel to it. Yet, maybe that’s the beauty of your poem: it was like you took a snapshot of Lily and James’s death and put it into a poem, which is why it stands by itself.
A lovely, lovely poem, SPEW buddy, and I really hope you write more.
Author's Response: Sorry about the lateness of my response. Real life has just been very busy over the past several months. I wrote a poem in the same style as this in eighth grade, which was honestly a statement to a teacher that loved long poetry. (For future reference, I don't like long poetry.) To respond to your criticism, I can't think of any way to expand it without breaking the flow of the poem. I felt like ending with James and Lily's deaths was a natural way to end the piece. When I wrote this poem, I had a picture in my mind, and in the poem I tried to describe that picture. I wasn't trying to tell a story, which may contribute to the unfinished feeling. I really appreciate your review, which was much longer than the poem, and I hope my response is half as coherent as your review. -Meg
The harsh realities of life separated them, but the even harsher realities of death brought them back together. But could an apology bring back the loss of innocence?
A companion piece to Hollow Soldiers.
This story has been nominated for a 2011 Quicksilver Quill Award: Best Dark/Angst Story.
Well, Jess, tell Xelina happy birthday from me, and that she has a very fascinating name :)
Despite its dark tone, I really liked this fic. I never really read stuff about Padma or Michael. I tend to stick with the Gryffindors and Slytherins for some reason, and I sort of forget about the Claws and the Puffs. Call me cruel, but there you go :) And that's my own house, as well! Perhaps it's because in the books, the Gryffindors and Slytherins are the main focus, really. The Gryffindors more so, I suppose, but the Puffs and Claws, while still being characterised, tend to be in the background -- with the exception of Luna, of course.
Shamefully, for this very reason, I can't actually remember when Lisa Turpin's name was even mentioned in Harry Potter. It can't have been a big thing, otherwise I'm sure I would've remembered her name. Still, this was a great premise to base a story on, although I would've liked to have known more about why Lisa was in a coma in the first place, and what caused her to relapse the way she did. I have a strange feeling that that's already on your author page, and I will trawl through it later, but if you haven't wrote one yet, Jess, I suggest you do so -- NOW.
The memory, while being surprisingly short, said so much more than its length. The interlude was timed perfectly and it really intensified the moment. I can imagine Padma's pain because you painted the picture so very clearly, so well done on that. It must've been awful to see your boyfriend with a prostitute, taking drugs. I mean, that's just...ugh. What I thought was most effective was that you didn't waste time on description or anything -- you just got straight to the point and I think, here, you proved to me that quality really is better than quantity, because the memory spoke volumes.
The transition back to the present was smoothly done, although I did wonder what happened to Padma and Michael when she had that breakdown. I feel you could've gone into more depth about that, as it seemed to be...missing, somehow. Even just a sentence would've sufficed, to be honest, just to tell us what happened in the gap.
Finally, I think you portrayed Padma's and Michael's self-hatred so very well in this fic, and I think that that was so effectively done that it deserves (unheard) applause from me. The fact that Padma's friend was as good as dead and was going to die any time soon and supposedly, the only thing Padma could think about was herself speaks volumes about her character. Similarly, with Michael, he clearly showed that he hated himself, but this time, I think it was justified. The thing with self hatred is, in my opinion, that while it's never healthy, sometimes -- just sometimes -- it shows your humility more than anything, and I think you've displayed that fabulously in this fic. So overall, Jess, ta for writing, and let me know if you've written or are planning to write any Lisa Turpin fics, since I'd love to know her side of the story.
If you haven't noticed, I have an affinity for very minor characters. Lisa is the most minor of all, since she was only mentioned in JKR's class list for Harry's year. She never made an appearance in the books. What I wanted, though, was to show how painful memories and past events could tear people apart, but it could also bring them back together. What happened to Lisa occurred during the battle, and that story will come eventually, but this was meant to focus on Padma's pain from all that had happened and how it had affected her broken relationship with Michael. Hopefully sooner rather than later, I'll get that prequel written.
I'm glad you picked up on the self-hatred both of them were harbouring. Michael hated himself for betraying Padma, and Padma blamed herself for whatever she had done to drive him to it. She simply didn't understand that things just don't work that way.
As for what happened right before the memory sequence... nothing, really. As soon as she was fit, they went straight for St Mungo's. I didn't remark upon it because there was nothing there to relay, honestly. She cried for a while, he held onto her, she stopped crying, and they left. I had originally had a bit like that in there, but it sounded too 'He did this. She did that. They did this.', so I cut it. Trust me... it sounds better the way it is, lol.
Drugs are a delicate subject to tackle in fan fiction, because they are often used as a plot device or, worse, glorified. I didn't want to make my story about the addiction, but rather about loss and maybe a bit about healing. And though there is a fair amount of hidden backstory, most of it is fairly easily gleaned, at least enough to understand the toll something like a comatose friend could affect a group of people who had been together for over half a decade.
Anyway, I'll stop rambling now. This was an excellent review, and I'm humbled that you chose my story to visit. Take care and happy SPEWing!
Summary: Al and Rose contemplate how to say those three little words.
Hmm. This is interesting. I've never heard of Albus being paired with Rose, since they're cousins. But it's not uncommon for cousins to marry, even first cousins, so I think you did a good job with it. I do think it was a little on the short side and that you could've made it a bit longer, in order for a full plot to develop. I wonder how Harry, Ron and Hermione took to Rose and Albus going out? That's something to think about, if you ever plan on writing a sequel. This was intriguing and well written, so well done.
Author's Response: I've always pictured Albus and Rose together, because they were, in my mind, inseperable friends. I don't know if they'll get married, I don't usually think past my plot. I'm not quite sure....I still see them as kids, not really as married adults. Harry was releived that Albus chose Rose, and not some freaky Slytherin, Ron was happy that his daughter had someone as nice as Al, and Hermione was just happy he wasn't on the dim side. Ginny, however, thought it was hilarious and never got over it....=)
Summary: Teddy Lupin appears to be surrounded by love and happiness, yet sometimes death and loneliness overshadow everything he does.
Hi Katrina! I know I promised you a ginormous review a while back, so I'm sorry it took so long. I blame it on RL — exams and revision and exams and revision and...you get my drift.
This story was a lovely way for me to have a break, so I'm glad I chose your story to read and review. Teddy/Victoire, while not being my OTP, has always had a special place in my heart, and I was very happy that you kept him paired with Victoire. What annoys me is when people ship Teddy with anyone except Victoire, because I honestly can’t think of anyone except her to be with him.
I think I’ll get the nitpicks out of the way first, and then I shall ladle on the praise.
I saw your friends there, and I went to wave to you, but there was no sign of your turquoise hair.
It took a couple of reads of that sentence and then the next one to figure out that you meant Teddy wasn’t there at all. At first, I thought Teddy was there, just not with turquoise hair. I think it’s better if you have the sentence like this:
I saw your friends there, and I went to wave to you, but you weren’t there.
Or something like that, anyway. Just...I got the wrong impression, that’s all.
“I wonder what it was like for him to be here, all alone, scratching himself to bits, trapped inside a monster.”
I paused at this. Surely Remus did more than scratching himself? I was under the impression that Remus bit himself, not just scratched. That sounds like a bit of an understatement, to be honest, so I would suggest changing it to something a bit...stronger.
Also, the way you sometimes used Victoire’s family’s names — like Harry and Fred. I kind of feel like she’d refer to them as Uncle Harry and Uncle Fred. But maybe that’s just me, because I come from an Asian family and we have to address our elders by their titles and not their names — as in, aunty, uncle, etc.
But they’re tiny, tiny things that don't even really need changing, because what overrides my nitpicks is the style and the thoughtfulness in this piece. Lately, I've actually been getting into second person, and since you’ve pulled off second person before, flawlessly, may I add, I wasn’t apprehensive when I saw it was written in that way. And I kind of think that it wasn’t exactly in second person since you used “I”, but I'm not an expert on this kind of thing. Whatever the style is called, you made brilliant use of it.
I really like how you began it, because it just made it sound more real, the way you used just the one word at the beginning. And the way Victoire addressed Teddy throughout the story was just in such a loving and caring way. It really was like they were meant to be. The way she listed the events, how she realised why Teddy was so special to her and why she loved him...it was beautiful, honestly.
In fact, this story has a poetic quality to it, an almost lyrical one, and it’s got nothing to do with being based on a song. It’s just the words you’ve chosen and the questions Victoire asks that make me just go “Aww” every time. And the way Victoire tries to assure Teddy that he's been through so much and that he doesn’t have to live up to Harry, and that he’s her hero...that was just so sweet.
If there was one thing I could change in DH, it’s Remus and Tonks’ deaths. It really made me cry, and it saddened me to know that Teddy would be brought up an orphan, just like Harry. In the same way, though, I can’t imagine what Teddy’s life would be like if he had his parents, any more than I can imagine Harry’s life with his parents. Victoire is definitely one wise girl, and you portrayed that beautifully.
I loved how Teddy’s hair became mousy when he was upset. That’s just so incredibly Tonks, and it was a lovely tribute to her, so I smiled when you put that in. I also really appreciated that Victoire didn't make a big hoo-ha when Teddy was crying. Boys/men cry — it’s a fact. It’s far from a miracle, I can tell you, so I was very, very glad when you had him as a normal boy, or as normal as you could get, given who his parents were.
Thank you very much, Katrina, for your lovely, lovely reviews, your much-needed criticism, the praise you give me that I never, ever deserve and most importantly, for writing stories like these, which touch my heart and make me remember why I bother writing/reading fanfiction.
P.S. I'm sorry if you got two notifications for this review. First time round the formatting was messed up, so that's why.
Author's Response: Soraya, this was such a lovely review!! It really made my day!! And sorry about the slightly late response... I have changed the first thing about Teddy's hair - I wasn't thinking about the fact that he could change it instantly when I wrote that sentence. As for Remus - I think you're right, I didn't really capture how terrible it was... I have tried to fix it, but I still don't think it's great. Somehow it works though, because it's in Teddy's dialogue and he really can't imagine what it was like for his father... if that makes any sense. But thanks for the comment. With the family names - this was something I actually thought about quite a lot. I'm not sure if you missed it, but in her direct speech, Victoire refers to "Uncle George". I didn't use it in the body of the text because even though I was using Victoire's voice, I wanted to focus on Teddy, and I don't think he would say uncle/aunty. Plus since I mentioned Harry quite a few times, it just sounded a bit clunky saying "Uncle Harry" repeatedly. But it was certainly a valid question. I have no idea what this style is called, I just like playing around with different perspectives and tenses. In this case, it really came from the song. But thanks for saying that I've pulled off second person before and that whatever the style I used in this is called worked for this story as well. I have to say, I was a little bit apprehensive about it. I wrote this story in about 1-2 hours, and even though it's one of my least read, it's almost the most reviewed of all my stories. I'm glad you liked the opening - not wanting to sound arrogant, but I do too. I think it contrasts well with the title, and it captures Teddy's emotion. I'm glad you found Victoire loving and caring and that her and Teddy fit so well together. Teddy's a character who I've always felt drawn to, and I just love the idea of him officially becoming a part of the Weasley clan, which presumably he has grown up as a part of. And I think Teddy would be one of those people who never realises how much he means to others. Mostly because his father was like that and Harry is like that, and I think in a slightly different way Tonks is too. This is also why I think he would think that he shouldn't complain or grieve, because he has it so much better than Harry did. That you say that it's beautiful and lyrical really means a lot. I agree, Remus and Tonks' deaths are tragic, but you're right, I can't imagine Teddy not being an orphan. I'm glad you thought Victoire wise - I think seeing someone you deeply care about try to bottle up their pain when they have every right to feel it would be quite heart-wrenching. And yes, I agree. Boys/men certainly cry, though perhaps not as often as some females. And I don't think Victoire would have any weird ideas about it not being manly to cry... after all, she just really cared about Teddy. I'm so glad that you enjoy my reviews, yours are certainly helpful and I love seeing your name appearing in my inbox. You've really given me very high praise in this story, and I can't think I deserve it. So thanks. Also, if you read Gina's reviews below, I am thinking of writing a companion to this story from Teddy's point of view. So look out for that. ~Katrina
Awwww. Carole, I was just trawling your author page because I was craving some Remus/Tonks, and I came across this :) The story is so sweet and the style is rather quirky which I found adorable. And it was just so well-written -- I liked how you intertwined old traditions with new. And I so giggled whenever I read "young wizard", lol.
Anyway, lovely story, Carole, and it's certainly satisfied my need for a Remus/Tonks story :) Well done!
Megan Jones had managed to successfully dodge all the normal pitfalls of adulthood: marriage, children, and the need to impress anyone. She didn't understand why everyone insisted that she was miserable, when she was, in fact, enjoying her current lifestyle.
Who would've thought one night could change everything?
Squee, Jess! Here I was, feeling very down and craving a good bit of fanfic, and I remembered you mentioned somewhere that you invented Megan/Charlie, so I thought I'd trawl through your author page and find the story :)
And once again, you have converted me! Megan Jones is a character I've never really considered, because I honestly can't remember when she was mentioned in the books. But you wrote her so well, and her characterisation was such an interesting interpretation of what she could have been like.
Also, I liked how you wrote the tension between them, especially considering the fact that they just met, lol. Anyway, lovely story, useless review from me, hehe. Well done :)
And here I thought my notifications were working again >.>
Glad you liked it. To me, the 30-somethings who are independent are a woefully underrepresented demographic in fanfic. And, of course, I couldn't let this go unremedied. Megan is that person people always talk about behind her back, speculating why she's alone and simply not accepting that she chooses to be. In a way, she's probably the closest I've come to self-insertion in fanfic, because I'm that way myself. I understand that drive to not compromise my wants and values for the sake of companionship.
Charlie and Megan's story will be continued soon (though hopefully before Lea's next birthday, hehe), in which we find out whether Megan really does go to Romania and why Charlie doesn't want to go home.
And this was so not a useless review. It made me smile and nod to myself that this was one of my favourite things I'd written this year. :D
Wow. Wow. Mere, this was so hauntingly beautiful in terms of its style. Never before have I read something that took my breath away so much simply by you wrote it. Your words were so carefully selected and in general, this piece was just gorgeous.
You wrote in third person present tense -- which I always thought was a rather difficult style, and yet you pulled it off and made it look effortless, so well done on that. The use of present tense made me feel more in the moment, and even though it was written in third person, I still felt a personal connection to Percy, especially as the story progressed. I really felt in touch with his emotions throughout, and the way you portrayed Percy's guilt, his self-hate, his regret -- you just nailed it, Mere. And I congratulate you on that.
Before I continue dishing out the praise, I'll get the nitpicks out of the way. You had a few typos, such as:
It if wasn’t for the look Mum had given him
I'm assuming you meant to write:
If it wasn't for the look Mum had given him
He sits there are stares at George.
I think you meant:
He sits there and stares at George.
The nineteen-year-old witch fixed her blue eyes on him piercingly.
You used the past tense here, and I think you were meant to use the present, as in:
The nineteen-year-old witch fixes her blue eyes on him piercingly.
"Firewhiskey" should always be capitalised, as far as I know.
Finally (as far as nitpicks are concerned) the use of "Mum" instead of "Molly" or "Mrs Weasley", given that this is written in third person, seemed a little odd, to me. But maybe you were trying to add to the personal feel of the story? I don't know.
Percy's characterisation, I think, was spot on. The fact that he couldn't bear to look at George because he looked exactly like Fred...oh, that was just awful. But you nailed it. (And of course, I meant awful in a good way, if that's possible.) What I really liked was that you didn't get all the Weasleys to just forgive him like that. They were all still uncomfortable with him. No surprises there. And then George's reaction to Percy was just so terrible. So terribly accurate. And he was portrayed brilliantly -- as a grieving twin, one who had lost his other half, in a way. I think you really hit the mark with George. His demeanour was so flat and grief-stricken, which is just so realistic, even if it is more than a little depressing.
Percy trying to drown his sorrows in drink is not unexpected. I'm really glad you confronted the not-so-nice aspects of life in this fic, because it held true to both canon and RL. I know you were saying in the controversial topics discussion in SPEW that if they have a place in RL, they should have a place in fanfiction too, and you displayed this brilliantly and sensitively here.
By the way, I don't normally comment on summaries, but yours was an amazing one. I find it so difficult to write summaries, and I have to say that your ones are so very intriguing -- and they most definitely live up to the actual story! One thing that I do have to mention is that you didn't have a strong profanity warning. Now, I have no problems with strong language, since I use it quite regularly in my fics (but not that much in RL) but still, I think it would've been good to have a warning.
I really liked Harry's comment about the gnomes, and the whole meeting in the Hog's Head about remembering the fallen was very well done. What I like the most about this fic, Mere, is that you've not made it cliched or anything. More often than not, I read Post-Hogwarts stories when straight after the battle, everyone acts like they're on happy pills or something. It's ridiculous and certainly not realistic, given how many casualties there were in the battle. So I really loved how you portrayed the grief of the survivors in this fic, because it was a far truer portrayal than a lot of Post-battle fics. You've managed to interweave your stunning prose with your great characterisation and your incredibly moving plot, making me sympathise with a character that I never liked very much until the end of DH when he appeared. And for that, I commend you highly and thank you for writing such a wonderful story.
Author's Response: AHHHHH thank you SO much for this wonderful review, Soraya! I think I'm still blushing from all your praise. I'm so glad that the present tense comes off as effortless because it really wasn't! The opening line came to me in present tense, but the through out the rest of it I had to constantly remind myself I was writing in present, not past. >.> Thank you for those nitpicks. I'm *facepalm*ing repeatedly for missing some of those. I'm glad you like my summary! I pride myself a little bit on my summaries, so it's always good to hear that someone likes them. :D As for the warning, though, this story is rated 6th-7th years and I think there's only one particularly strong word... Or maybe I just swear too much, haha. I'm glad that you pointed out the gnome part because it's one of my favourites, but it's also one of the parts that I was a little unsure of how it would be received. :D Thank you so much again for this fantastic review. It makes me so happy to know that this story came across as a realistic portrayal of the aftermath of the Battle. :) <3Mere
Summary: Sofia seeks refuge within the walls of Hogwarts from the bloodied and terror-filled streets of Krakow. Yet she is not entirely welcomed. The moment she reaches the cold shores of England she experiences jealousy, loss of identity, the perils of war and the question of her right to exist.
Nominated for Best Historical in the QSQs 2011.
Oooh! I knew Sofia would be going to Hogwarts eventually. I really like Dumbledore's characterisation here, by the way. Almost always in fanfiction, even after DH came out, Dumbledore's portrayed as a really, really nice guy. But in your story, you've shown he has flaws and he's not as perfect as he might seem.
As usual, your description is lovely and I'm really, really enjoying this story so far. It's a shame there haven't been many reviews for this, but I think that this is a very underrated story. Well done and looking forward to the next chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your ridiculously kind words! Your reviews really motivated me and I've just completed chapter five, hopefully chapter four should be validated soon xx
Oooh, this was good! As usual, I'm sort of on the go while reading this, so it won't be long. I liked the way you began it with the dream and everything -- it was an interesting way to start a chapter. And the idea of Kindertransport sounds great!
Dumbledore has been characterised really well too and once again, your description is definitely your strong point, although I have to say, I think Mrs Brigham is more than a little annoying. Lovely chapter again!
Author's Response: Aha, you'll learn to love her! She's not all bad! She has a rather interesting daughter. I'm glad you liked the chapter; I really look forward to your reviews, they're always so nice :) Thank you so much for reading xxx Good luck with your exams!
I don't have much time but this was a great chapter! This was an authentic chapter and it was very well written. Well done!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! It's just lovely knowing you've kept coming back for more!
This was possibly the best chapter yet. A lot more went on, and I really think Sofia is very well fleshed out as an OC. I've come to like Mrs Brigham, although as a Muslim, I did sympathise with Sofia when she didn't want to eat the bacon sandwich, even though meat was difficult to get hold of as it was during the war.
I think that as we move on in the story, Sofia will prove to us that she can wheedle her way into anything -- she certainly managed to persuade Mrs Brigham in this chapter. I reckon it'll prove to be one of Sofia's talents. And I love how you haven't suddenly got them speaking perfect English -- it takes a while for you to learn no matter how young you are.
I have a feeling the Polish students will be facing a lot more grief from their fellow pupils, and I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Update soon, and well done!
Author's Response: Thank you very much, that's a lovely review. The bacon sandwich is actually pretty important as the fiction progresses, as strange as that may seem, and you are spot on with Sofia's talent! She's very good with persuasion and words. Thank you for your lovely review. :)
Wow. Your writing is so poetic in its description -- it's an art that not many writers have, so kudos for that.
I loved your characterisation of Dippet. It was very well done and you gave him a good character, basing it on what we saw in CoS. I also thought that Dumbledore's was really interesting, especially the way he referred to Grindelwald. I found this really intriguing, the way his mindset was still in Greater Good mode.
And then they rejected her! Somehow I have a feeling she'll just turn up there anyway and get a job in Hogwarts or something. Or at least in Hogsmeade. Hmm. I think you've done a great job on Sofia so far, same with her parents, and the ending of this chapter was just beautiful. Like I said, you have the rare talent of making your descriptions poetic and just... gorgeous.
My only suggestion at the moment is to make chapters longer. This chapter is pretty short, and while I adored the ending of this one, I do think that it'd do you good to join maybe two of them together. But it's your choice, at the end of the day -- your story, after all.
This was a great chapter and I'm interested in the plot development from here. You have taken a never-used-before premise of a Muggleborn Polish Jew and that in itself takes a lot of courage. I think you did a great job so far and this story deserves far more reviews than it has received so far. I'll probably get round to reviewing again tomorrow and then I'll be up to date :)
Author's Response: Thank you so much! The chapters do get progressively longer, there's one in the queue now that's about 2000 words I believe, and the one I'm writing now is currently at 2000, with more to come! Sofia will get to Hogwarts eventually as a student, but hey, I can't make it easy for her ;) Thank you so much for your kind review! It's really nice to know that I have a loyal reader out there :)
Summary: When Sirius's plans for Hogsmeade backfire, he ends up taking Lily Evans to Madam Puddifoot's instead, only to find James is not at all happy to see them sharing a tart. And when James's date kisses Sirius, Lily storms off as well, leaving him on the floor covered in chocolate. Yet things are even more complicated than they seem…
This is Gmariam of Ravenclaw writing for the 2011 Aprils Fools' Day Challenge in the Great Hall, Prompt 3, Marauder Era.
Aaaah, I loved this, Gina. I'm sorry, I can't leave much more of a coherent review after such an LOL-worthy story. Hahahaahahaahaha. That was hilarious, and it's made me love Sirily. Wonderful :D
Author's Response: Thank you very much, Soraya! I'm glad you enjoyed this and had a good laugh. I had a good laugh writing it too. I have to admit I'm sort of intrigued by Sirily (don't let Carole hear me say that, lol!) so it was fun to play with that here. Thanks so much for the review, and for the nomination! ~Gina :)
Summary: Humiliated in front of the entire school by the purple-faced Pomona Sprout, Gilderoy Lockhart plots a grand revenge. His weapon of choice - a goblet full to the brim with steaming cocoa.
But has he underestimated the redoubtable Head of Hufflepuff House?
This is Gmariam of Ravenclaw and Equinox Chick of Hufflepuff writing for the 2011 Aprils Fools' Day Challenge in the Great Hall, Prompt 2 - Don't You Dare Prank Me!.
Disclaimer: We are not JK Rowling. If we had been, then there'd be far more stories about the Marauders in print.
This story is dedicated to our flist - especially the lovely Natalie (hestiajones). Enjoy!
Thanks for the on-the-hoof beta job, hestiajones.
Giddling madly, our story has been nominated for a 2011 QSQ for 'Best Darn Story Ever On The Archives' - okay, I mean Best HumoUr.
Wooow. I was laughing through the whole thing! Seriously, the end just had me in stitches. Definitely cheered me up today :D
I don't know what to say! This was just so funny and I thought Lockhart's characterisation was spot on, as was Pomona's and Minerva's. Snape's, however... I was a bit confused at the end. Did he... you know... with Lockhart? LOL.
Excellently written, Carole and Gina. You guys need to collaborate more often XD
Summary: It's 2012 and for Charlie Weasley, life in Romania with his dragons is good. Okay, his mum doesn't stop nagging him about his love-life, but at least she's not attacking his hair with scissors. The only cloud is the Ministry of Magic's threat to slash their funding. What Charlie needs to do is charm the visiting Ministry official. Unfortunately, he hadn't expected it to be his brother's prim ex-girlfriend.
Will she slash his budget? Or can he make her change her mind?
This is Equinox Chick of Hufflepuff and this is my entry in the April Fool's Challenge ~ Prompt #3 Next Gen.
A huge thank you to Sarah (SapphireatDawn) for beta'ing this at record speed.
Inspiration for this pairing came from Julia - she features in the fic ... sort of ...
Disclaimer: You must know by now that I'm not JK Rowling.
Carole, I loved this! (I mentioned on the LS about how I don't review everything I read -- well, this is one of them. *hangs head in shame*)
Anywho, what an original rarepair. I never, ever would have thought that Charlie and Penelope had any kind of connection, but you made the pairing so believable. I liked how Penelope was frosty to begin with, but then she loosened up eventually, with a good old drink, ha ha.
Charlie is one character in the fandom who I've seen with so many different people -- Parvati (in Alex's The Winged Lion -- dunno if you've read that but tis excellent), Oliver, and, of course, Tonks. I liked the mention of Charlie/Tonks too, actually; after reading Apparently Asleep, hehe.
Oh, and I loved the ending. It was quite open, but from the mentions of Charlope in some of your other work, they do get together in the end. Yay to that :D I'd love to see a sequel, actually, but no pressure of course.
Fab story, Carole!
Author's Response: Thank you. Julia suggested the pairing ages ago on LJ when I was scratching around for a challenge. I like Charlie and the thought of him being with Percy's ex (who sadly gets tarred with the same brush as Percy, poor lamb) interested me.
There should be a sequel, I do have one very clearly in mind, and yes, there are hints of Charlope in High and ... um ... Jominique (another sequel possibly). I have read The Winged Lion (not sure I finished it, actually, so must check that out) and I've read some Charlie/Olivers. I like Charlope too much now to switch, but pre-each other they can have all the fun in the world - heh heh heh.
Thank you very much for reviewing ~Carole~
Summary: Dominique Weasley’s life is a mess. At seventeen years of age, she’s in her final year at Hogwarts, and things couldn’t be going any worse. She’s failing most of her NEWT classes, her perfect mother is driving her crazy, she’s practically a magnet for trouble and she hates Felix Thomas with a burning passion.
And now she’s pregnant.
This was an interesting start to the story. I once read a story when Lily got pregnant, but never Dominique. She's quite a minor character, and I think you fleshed her out quite well. Having said that, Rose, in this chapter, was a little...monotonous. She was just sort of...there. I hope you characterise her more in the next chapter, because I think you have an intriguing story here despite that. Oh, also, slight nitpick:
"He's gonna get his ass kicked by..."
It should be "arse" and not "ass" because Dominique is British, not American. And I'm not entirely crazy about the "gonna" but that's your choice, I suppose.
Anyway, nitpicks aside, I'll be interested to see where you go from here, as overall it was a good start.
Thanks for your review! I get what you mean with the ass/arse thing though, but I stand by the 'gonna', just because its so informal and it's just what Dom is like. Rose is too blah in this chapter, I agree. I'll definitely be characterising her more, just not the next chapter, because she's not really in it.
I actually did read the pregnant Lily one - A Moment, A Love by jenny b? That's turning into quite a good story, but other than the concept of teenage pregnancy, it doesn't really have much to do with Saving Dominique. I've also read a pregnant Rose one. I don't think, if I'd chosen Lily or Rose, that they could have done my storyline justice.
Anyway thanks for the criticism! Every little bit helps; I'm trying to get this fic just right!
Hannah Abbott was up to her eyeballs in a business she scarcely knew how to run. Out of money and sleep deprived, all she could do was grind out day after day, but she couldn't last forever that way.
And then Neville walked into her pub and into her life. Things might've started looking up, after all.
First of all, happy birthday, Lori!
I'm always in the mood for some Neville/Hannah, and I was squeeeing when I read this, Jess :) I just loved how touchy-feely Neville was, and the best thing was, he wasn't even aware of it, so I couldn't even blame the poor boy. This obviously isn't a SPEW review, more a squee one, but I hope you don't mind. I just woke up to this, so I just had to let you know how great it was. But that's no surprise, since you wrote it ;)
I hope you write another Neville/Hannah soon!!
Actually, I've been sitting on this plot bunny for a while, and Lori's birthday gave me a good reason to dust it off. As my first job was in the restaurant business, I felt a commiseration with Hannah's borderline slavery to her business. Neville did only start out as wanting to help her out as a friend, but in the end started looking forward to his visits as she did.
Thanks for the review. I would ramble some more, but I still haven't written my Brawl drabble yet. o.O
Summary: Remus had never really considered the possibility of having a girlfriend. But is there a girl out there who can change his mind, who can crawl under his skin until her existence is what ties him to life?
I must say, Katrina, that when I first saw the summary and read "Remus/Marlene" I almost didn't click on it, because I'm a firm Remus/Tonks shipper. It's always been Remus/Tonks, tbh, but I do enjoy the occasional guilty pleasure of Remus being with someone else. It makes a nice change :)
I thought that the story's pacing was a bit...hmm. I don;t mean this in a bad way, but I kind of felt that while it wasn't rushed, at times, things went a little too fast or too slow. I also felt that since this was meant to be a romance fic, you barely focused on Remus, and spent more time on the other Marauders, which struck me as a little strange.
But they were just little things, and overall I thoroughly enjoyed reading this fic. I'm glad you didn't get Remus to reveal all to Marlene and Lily about him being a werewolf, because that would just spoil things, to be honest, and it's quite cliched to do that. I also found it fascinating that you didn't use the whole SexGod!Sirius cliche, even though I've got a soft spot for that cliche, since I Siriusly do love him :D
I also liked Remus' uncertainty about having a girlfriend. That's very Remus-like, especially because he was quite insecure about being a werewolf and everything. Peter was portrayed well, and not Bedwetting!Peter or Loser!Peter or Can'tGetGirls!Peter, because they're all my pet peeves at the moment. I think he was probably that "fat little boy" when he was younger, so I liked your take on how he became more attractive as he grew up.
I did hesitate upon reading that Sirius told the Marauders about kissing Alexa. I mean, girls do it, because they're girls, but sure guys just like to mind their own business in that ballpark? I know you did get Remus to say that that was enough in terms of details, but still, I think it's unlikely that Sirius would tell his friends about it, considering how haughty he could be at times (or, you could say, arrogant) he wouldn't really want to tell his friends about an embarrassing first kiss. But yeah. That's just what I think :)
I wanted to leave you a review as a thank-you for reading and reviewing every posted chapter of Checkmate within the space of a day. I don't know how you did it (I spent three weeks reading all of Alex/welshdevondragon's Thin Red Lines) but I'm very grateful for your reviews, because they mean a lot. So thank you, and well done, and I hope this review puts a smile on your face as much as your reviews did to me :)
Author's Response: Thanks so much for this long and detailed review, Soraya! I'm definitely a Remus/Tonks shipper, too, but this idea came to me, and it doesn't exclude Remus/Tonks, so I thought I'd write it. I think a lot of your points are valid. To be honest, this was a very rushed story, because I knew I'd be busy and wouldn't have time to fix it up properly for a while and I prefer to finish things... if that makes sense... I'm now considering deleting it and re-writing it. Perhaps I'll re-write it more as a Marauder Era fic, because I think you're right, I focus too much on the other Marauders for this to be purely a Remus/Marlene. In a way, though, I think Remus would be very influenced by what his friends thought and believed. I'm glad you liked my characterisations of Sirius and Peter - I tried to make them a bit different. Particularly Peter, because I don't really like how in a lot of fics he seems like a loser or someone that the Marauders don't trust, even at Hogwarts. I think that's unlikely, because James and Lily (and Sirius) trusted him with their lives... so it must have come from somewhere. I wrote him like that because I think above all he admires and wants to be like James, and James couldn't get Lily so Peter was trying to prove that at least in some things he was better than James. I'm not sure about Sirius telling about the kiss... (I've never been a teenage boy lol). I think Sirius is the kind of person who hides his own insecurity by being loud and telling people more than he should. So by telling his friends this, he knows he'll put them on the back foot because they'll be embarassed and he won't have to think about the fact that he feels he failed with girls or something like that. Which is why I had James looking at him, able to read him, because James knows that Sirius has this underlying insecurity. Anyway, I'll definitely think about cutting that bit... Thanks so much for reviewing, and I'm glad you appreciated my reviews on Checkmate. ~Katrina
Summary: Coming home late from an Auror assignment, Ron faces a conversation he didn't expect... at least, not for a few more years.
Just a fun little one-shot, dedicated to Lori (WeasleyMom), the Queen of all things Romione.
Aw, this was so cute, Lisa! This is in no way a SPEW review, but I just wanted to say that I love your Romione stories just as much as Lori's. They're lovely. :) And this one was great -- it really bridged the gap between Rose's and Hugo's births, while remaining clean and innocent. So ta for writing, and well done. By the way, are you going to finish Beauty and the Beast, or The Metamorphmagus and the Werewolf any time soon? I'd really like to know where it's going, so I'd love it if you could update :D
Author's Response: Thanks Soraya! I'm glad you reviewed, even if it wasn't a spew review. ;D And you like my R/H as much as Lori's? That's quite the compliment!
The next chapter in B&BoTMatW is almost done, I'm just too lazy to finish it. XP Man, Soraya, you've read that, too? Do you read everything I write? Not that there's anything wrong with that... >.> I'm just curious as to why. I don't think I'm the best writer on here by far... Oh, and clean and innocent is my forte. I'm glad you noticed it. =D
Summary: For Remus Lupin, Easter has always been his favourite time of year. It has nothing to do with chocolate, he tells his friends, and everything to do with timing...
Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling or the Easter Bunny, but here's a little Easter gift for everyone at MNFF.
Thank you Natalie (hestiajones) for beta'ing this story and for being all round a ... a ... amazing.
Aww!! Squeeeeee!!! This was lovely, Carole. While I don't celebrate Easter, I have to say that I love it anyway -- even though I hate chocolate (looong story) it always makes me smile to see little kids going on Easter egg hunts or eating tons of chocolate. And I really liked how you tied Easter with Remus, and how this also tied in with the title. This was a beautiful fic and I really enjoyed it. Is it compliant with Apparently Asleep? And WHEN are you going to update that? I'm on tenterhooks on where you left off so please please please post the next chapter soon. And enjoy your Easter!
Author's Response: Thank you, Soraya. I celebrate Easter insofar as I buy Easter Eggs but that's about it. Uhm ... Apparently Asleep *shamefaced*. Okay, my plan, because I have at least 5 WIP's, is to complete some of the shorter chaptered fics first so I can concentrate on Lions and AA. Hopefully this means that once I get back to them, I will be able to crank out the chapters quickly. Well ... that's the plan. I also really want to get back to AA because I want to write about Bill - ha ha. Thanks for the review ~Carole~