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I like reading, writing, doing role-plays, playing the guitar and eating soup.

All at the same time.

I am more than slightly obsessed with Neil Cicierega, Colin Firth,
Michael Ball, the Discworld series and classic novels written by such names as Jane Austen, the Bronte sisters and Victor Hugo.
I quite like science-fiction novels, too. And fantasy novels...

I like to knit. Knitting is an immensely relaxing hobby.

I also have a strange addiction to Orange flavoured tictacs.
Freshness in 2 calories!
I found a box of tictacs in Target the other day, and it was THREE TIMES THE SIZE OF A NORMAL PACKET OF TICTACS!
I ate the whole thing in an hour...

Continuing on.

I absolutely adore musical theatre, and secretly sing along to my favourites out in my garage when I think no-one is listening.

Yes, my life is that sad.

I have a crazy Math teacher who is obsessed with failing me because I write fanfiction in my Math book instead of actually doing the Math work assigned.
I don't actually publish my fanfiction, because it's mainly full of ninjas and obscene things like that.


If you haven't noticed already, I get off topic quite quickly. This doesn't happen when I'm verbally talking, but it happens quite often when I'm typing.

I have two cats that like to sabotage me while I'm on the computer by sitting on the keyboard right in my line of vision of the screen.

I also enjoy writing pointless bio's on sites like these, because half the information I write in them is pointless, and no-one ever reads them.

If you do ever end up reading this, good for you. You have just wasted at least 5 minutes of your life.

I apologize for any inconveniences I may have caused.

Have a nice day!

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Reviews by Nova

Potter's Pentagon: The Past (Book Three) by Schmerg_The_Impaler

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: The final installment in the Potter’s Pentagon Trilogy. Read “The Five” and “The Truth” first, myess? Okay!

WARNING! Contains Muggle adventures in Diagon Alley, unusual eyebrows, cheesy clichés galore, psycho Ted, the not-so-lost years of Merlin, a school-wide singalong, the old potato joke, Tyrone’s Princess Bride obsession, Emma’s stubborn denial of the existence of Tyrone’s mustache, a graphic death, a joke shop product as a major plot device, hobo Jordan, Jordan hugging, Jordan pulling pranks, time travel, the Love Shack, angst, and worst of all, Professor Zabini.

It’s the sixth year for Potter’s Pentagon and company, and our heroes learn that in the wizarding world, coming of age has a somewhat weightier significance. Students are busy with an Inter-House Unity Project, Jordan is having weird dreams, Pansy and Ophidias Malfoy have been released from Azkaban, Professor Zabini has a mysterious project of his own, and almost everyone is acting strangely. Meanwhile, at the Ministry of Magic, a man with a vendetta against Ron Weasley is trying his hardest to get him in the biggest trouble possible. Is the only way to save him to travel into the past?

New talents are discovered, new friendships form and old ones change, pasts are dredged up, and, of course, there’s lots of good old-fashioned snogging. And one of the five kills for the first time… while another becomes a casualty of war.

Starring 2008 Quicksilver Quills Best Male Original Character runner-up Jordan Potter, Best Female Original Character nominees Ivy Potter, Haley Potter, Emma Weasley, and Giorgi Anderson, and Best Male Original Character nominee Ted Lupin! Nominated for 2008 Quicksilver Quills Best Post-Hogwarts Story.
Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 09/02/09 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1: In Which Jordan Has A Bad Experience With A Hobo


Duuuh. I'm stoopid.
I DID know that she was called Haley, but I was reading a fic just before this one where the lead character's name is Hayley with that extra little 'y', so I was stupid and got them confused.
Hopefully you can forgive me.


Author's Response: Oh, I don't mind. I was just joking around by trying to get you to think I was explicitly telling you that Haley doesn't die... it's fine, haha, my sister always spells her name "Hailey."

Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 03/28/09 Title: Chapter 14: Chapter : In Which Jordan is Unnecessarily Dramatic

Woo! Updaaate.
I love updates.

Oh, wow. That chapter was like... I don't even know.

I wish Anatoly was a real person. He's just so cool!

There's a couple of weird sentences here and there, like when Jor-jums is e-mailing Giorgi...

'Still, I’ll going to legally come of age, which is exciting.'

It should probably be I'M going to legally... etc, blah blah blah.

And there's a couple of repetitions...

'Her soft cotton dress robes were a pale tea blue, with a square neck and they were accentuated by a square neck and short puffed sleeves.'

As you can probably tell, you wrote 'square neck' twice, without really needing to, and later on you wrote:

'“Here I go!” she announced, skipping toward the restroom to the restroom to get ready for the ball.'

But that's okay. I don't think anyone will care all that much, unless they're among the ranks of the grammar police or something...

Emma should be more accepting toward Hayley and Anatoly! They make such a cute couple!

I can't wait to see how Hayley's 'powers' develop.

Good luck with your school musical!


Author's Response: Oh, I'm SO glad you liked this chapter! I worried it'd be too overdramatic. And yes, it would not be a Schmerg_The_Impaler story if it wasn't riddled with typos! ^_^ Now, I'm not suggesting at all that Haley and Anatoly are a couple, but I do have so much fun writing them together-- and Emma is being a poopface. :-( Actually, Haley won't be developing any outstanding magical powers. I don't know if I made this clear, but Jordan isn't becoming a Seer because he's Merlin's heir, he's Merlin's heir BECAUSE he happens to be a Seer. Likewise, Haley won't be getting any braver because she's Gryffindor's heir. She's Gryffindor's heir because she's so brave! But we will be seeing more of her bravery later in the story.

I'm really looking forward to our musical! I'm the Queen of France and in the ensemble, and I think it'll be a lot of fun. But we only have less than a month to put it together-- yikes!

Nott On Your Life by Schmerg_The_Impaler

Rated: 3rd-5th Years •
Summary: Theodore Nott has had quite his share of adventures, thank you very much. Bravery has never been a Slytherin value. But when he stumbles across a corpse, Theo begins an adventure that includes carnivorous plants, bizarre food items, a disturbingly amorous butcher, lots of blood and gore, plot twists galore, the rhyme I just made, and a little bit of the Grim Reaper thrown in just to spice things up.

I suggest you read at least one of the previous Theo Nott stories ("To Be Or Nott To Be" and "Oh No, Nott Again!") so that this will make more sense to you, but if you don't, that's your funeral. Oh, ha, ha, aren't I just chock-full of puns today?

I am Schmerg_The_Impaler of Hufflepuff House, and this is my submission to Gauntlet Number Seven!
Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 11/25/08 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1: As If Things Weren't Weird Enough Already

First Post! :D

Argh. Cliffies! Of course we all want to know... Who's in the meat locker?

Another great story, Schmergo.
A couple of small errors, like forgetting letters in words and end brackets... but they don't matter :)

Update soon!

Author's Response: Oh dear, I am just full of typos! It's great to get my first revieeeew, though!

Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 01/10/09 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2: And More And More Violent....

*GASP!* Whyyy was I not informed of this update!?

Probably because I am stupid and haven't been bothered to check.

I'm certainly on a roll today. 2 reviews already, and I haven't even been awake for 2 hours.

*superhero music* REVIEW TIIME!

Oh wow, this is REALLY chock-full of action.

Woooah. This is one craaazy story!
Who would've thought that Argus Filch was behind it all. Well actually Mr. Deathly was...

CONTINUING ON! *trumpet noises*.

YES! GO ABERFORTH! He's so cool with his goats and all. If he was my granddaddy, I would use it as my comeback. If someone said I was ugly, I'd be all like... 'YEAH!? WELL MY GRANDDAD FARMS GOATS!'

Sorry. I'm not in my right mind today.
And I haven't even eaten any tictacs!
I haven't eaten ANYTHING for that matter...

And I'm glad that my stupid reviews make you smile. Usually when I go on crazy rants like I do in reviews, people tend to think that I'm inconceivably odd.


I'm really sorry.

But I love the story.

I think it's fantastickalickious.

Goodbye, now!

Author's Response: Ah, you're just bent on making me happy today. And yes, this CERTAINLY IS one crazy story! But... you should so know by now that I love making Argus Filch my evil mastermind... after all he DID buy all of Voldemort's evil powers off of Bay!

I love, love, love Aberforth. It would be awesome if he was my granddad. HEY, AND THEN WE COULD BE COUSINS!

Hanky-Panky: A Potter's Pentagon One-Shot by Schmerg_The_Impaler

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: It's that time of year. Time for an untimely winter ball, and Emma Weasley is not thrilled about Tyrone Thomas' relentless pursuit if her. But will his terrible singing and creepy stalker-ish antics woo her at last? And what the heck is Jordan Potter up to? DH is very disregarded. No Albus Severuses here.

I am Schmerg_The_Impaler of Hufflepuff House, and this is my submission to the Winter Snows thingy, in the "Melting a Winter Heart" category.
Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 12/23/08 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Aww! That was so cute. x3
You should make Giorgi and Jor-jums get together in further chapters of 'The Past'. That would be awesome :D.
Wow. Who would say no to some-one serenading them in the middle of a Potions class while wearing a home-made suit of armour?

Merry Christmas!

Author's Response: Awww, thank you! And merry Christmas to you, too. And, um, I would NEVER say no to anyone who serenades me during class! The "Lord Tyrone" is based on an incident that happened my freshman year of high school. We were sitting in chorus, when all of a sudden, this dude comes in in tights and yells, "PRESENTING... PRINCE ERIK!" And a red carpet unrolled, and this guy comes inside wearing a home-made suit of armour and he says to some girl, "Elissa... willst thou goeth to Homecoming with me?" It was the cutest thing I have ever seen.

Everything We Could Have Been by redcastle

Rated: 6th-7th Years •
Summary: With Ron's constant snogging of his new girlfriend, Lavender, Hermione is never around. Yes, she was jealous of Lavender and upset with Ron, but what was she doing all this time? The rise of Voldemort, constant pressure in school, and her love for Ron are clear issues in her life, but what if Hermione was struggling with other problems—problems no one else, save one, knew about? What if, while in love with Ron, she found herself falling in love with someone else—someone none of her friends, nor herself, would ever have expected? This is the bittersweet tale of the love that blossomed between Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy during their 6th year at Hogwarts and beyond.

**UPDATE:** I am sorry for taking such a long break. I am now rewriting the story from a third person perspective because I just feel it is my stronger style and I feel I could not describe things the way I wanted to simply from Hermione's eyes, especially because she could not know Draco's thoughts, which I would like to include. I hope to finish the new Prologue in a few days and hopefully it will be validated quickly. I will probably just delete the current chapters as soon as the new version is accepted. Please continue to review and let me know what your opinion of the new version is. Again, I am so sorry. Future updates will be announced on my livejournal account so please follow there and comment. Thank you for any fans left out there who believe in my story. I am also looking for a beta to please look over my chapters before I submit them. Send me a message on the forum (username: redcastle) or on livejournal (username: cherryredcastle) if you are interested.
Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 03/15/11 Title: Everything We Could Have Been

I never got to read the other version of the story, but just from reading the Prologue, I'm really enjoying the style. I'm a sucker for Hermione/Draco, so keep posting!

Our Little Secret by Kerichi

Rated: 6th-7th Years • Past Featured Story

It was like a wizard tale. The clever Slytherin helps a hag who later repays the debt. Except that Rose Weasley wasn't a hag, and Scorpius didn't expect to call in the favour.

*Winner of the 2010 Next Generation QSQ award*

Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 03/15/09 Title: Chapter 3: Questions

"He said Miley Siren can't sing!"

Haha. Do I detect a hint of Miley Cyrus, maybe?

Great fic, this one. It's really interesting and leaves you hungry for more...

I love the sneaky chemistry between Rose and Scorpius, It makes the story all that more exciting.

Just as always, your work is fabulous.
Keep up the good work!


Author's Response: Chapter six (which validated a little while ago) mentions Britney Sparkles, so there may be more than a hint, heh. Thank you for loving the chemistry. Neither of them is going to come right out and admit an attraction, but if they're put in a position where they can act on it... ;)

Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 08/28/09 Title: Chapter 23: Decisions

But I don't want it to end! D:

Although I haven't left any reviews previously, I've followed this story since the beginning ant I'd have to say that it really is a great piece of writing.

I really love how you've left the story at just a point that we as readers can use our imaginations and create our own endings for Rose and Scorpius' relationship. (Unless, of course, you're writing a sequel!)


Author's Response: Thank you for following the story! (and telling me you were reading. :) I will write a sequel, but it won't be for a month or two (Remus and Tonks are demanding an alternate ending where they live and fall for each other all over again), so you can compare what you imagined happened to what will! ^_~

Harry and Lord V: Beauty and the Beast Gone Potter by Schmerg_The_Impaler

Rated: 1st-2nd Years •
Summary: Yet another ridiculous Harry Potter musical spoof by yours truly, this one is set during Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, to the tune of Alan Menken, Howard Ashman, and Tim Rice's brilliant musical, Beauty and the Beast!

If you like this, go to my profile and read some of my other parodies, of West Side Story, Wicked, Sweeney Todd, High School Musical, Les Miserables, and Phantom of the Opera!
Reviewer: Nova Signed
Date: 07/07/09 Title: Chapter 1: ACT ONE



That was awesome.

Beauty and the Beast has been my absolute favorite since I was a kid, so combining Beauty and the Beast and H.P is just mind-blowingly FANTASTIC.

If this was ever put on stage (with your lyrics, of course), Terrence Mann would be a great Snape.

Off to read Act 2!


Author's Response: Oh, wow, thanks! I've wanted to be in Beauty and the Beast for the longest time, and I've missed THREE opportunities to try out through various horrible circumstances. Poo. :-( I've always thought Terry Mann would be a great Snape, too, if he had a prosthetic nose! It's like we're the same person, hahaha. Though actually, I really want to see Terry Mann playing Frollo in Hunchback of Notre Dame.