'Ello! My name is Sylladi, and I've finally put another story in the queue! It is called "The Heir Apparent," a name which will play an unusually crucial role in the plot later on. I am trying something new with this piece of writing, and it is definitely the most mature piece I've ever written. The first chapter, which is called "First and Last," should hopefully be up any day now, and if you like it even half as much as I do then I will be very happy!
I just started writing the second installment of "Heir," which will be called "Riddle with a capital R." I hope to have it finished just after chapter one comes out of the queue. I am very excited as to where this story is heading!
As for more about me, I am a first-year college student now, with a major in communications/writing, and I hope to someday work as an editor at a publishing company.
Also, I hate to tell you this, but my previous fanfic, The Sabina Affair, of which I had written many more chapters than ever appeared online, has been lost. I have tried to remember as much as I could, but the ensuing chapters have never again met my satisfaction, and I am sure they will not me yours. Therefore, The Sabina Affair has been permanantly halted. I am sorry to those who I know loved it. :(
This was good and original! I love that Sirius is still alive!!! Anyway, keep writing! I need more! Just one thing, watch out for repeated words and phrases, they mess with the flow of your story. :)
Author's Response: Thanks for the advice I will keep it in mind, I need the concrit.
To be honest, I loved the idea, but not the actual story. Sorry. The letter from Ron is actually what turned me away, it sounded too out of character. The flow of his words, and the words themselves, were too pompous for Ron. It almost sounded like Percy or Hermione. If this was intentional, it wasn't well explained.
Sorry, not my cup of tea. I'm glad other people like it, though. You can never please everyone.
Author's Response: Fair enough, I was never entirely convinced by that part either, to be honest. Thank you for explaining why you didn\'t like it properly and politely ... not everyone would do the same. =)
I'd just like to point out a few things:
1. you blow a "gasket" when angry, not a casket...
2. the pictures on Bernard's walls are all artsy shapes, so I doubt that you wanted one to look like "steak." Unless that was just to show that Ron really does think about food all the time.^^
Hope that helps. Overall a pretty good story. I will keep reading.
Author's Response: That does help. Typos will be the death of me! ;) I'm glad you like the story overall!
Well, now I simply must keep reading, only to see who this woman is...
I started reading your story because someone said my fic reminded them of yours. I'm afraid that maybe the same woman is now coming back in both (although not as literally in mine, if that is the case).
And I have one typo that really bothered me:
"bronze" should be "brawn" when Bernard was insulting Ron. Although I must admit this mistake made me giggle. I was just imagining a metal Ron walking around somewhere...^^
Author's Response: Alas, I always have some typo or other! I'll try and fix that; thanks for pointing it out!
Congrats X2pttrclue32 on such a good story! I will certainly keep reading, as you continue to post more chapters.
However, I would like to point out that some parts of this chapter contain repetitions of the same word, like year and dead, that can become a little annoying. Also, "Magical Law" appears twice in a row in the letter from the ministry of magic.
Anyway, great job, good story!