What can I say. I'm a grown woman living in London but I'm obsessed with a teenage wizard and his friends. Am I mad? Probably Do I care? Hell no!
EDIT: Grown? Um, probably not
For my first foray into the realms of fanfiction I've chosen to write about the Marauders. I'll always stick fairly closely to canon as I think JK knows best. Although I've enjoyed reading about other ships I, personally, don't think I could write with conviction about Ginny/Crabbe or Hermione/Mclaggan relationships.
EDIT: ha ha ha ha ha - How I have changed! I'm now firmly in the rare-pair, SSP, and things that aren't quite conventional camp, although I still loves me some James/Lily.
My second chaptered fic (Apparently Asleep) has started a love affair with Tonks/Remus and confirmed my obsession for all things Sirius. *sigh*
I am indebted to Terri (mudbloodproud) for being a great beta and all round amazing person. If it hadn't been for her encouragement I would have thrown in the towel many months ago.
EDIT: I have made a lot of wonderful friends during my past three years on MNFF, including (in no particular order) Natalie, Kara, Hannah/Bob, Jess, Gina, Lea, Lori, Julia, Minna, Emmahhhh, and the fantabulous BB.
I hope Mugglenet and you enjoy reading my words as much as I've enjoyed writing them. Huge thank-you to my niece, Amanda, for being one of the first to catch the Harry Potter bug and nagging me into reading them.
I’ve written a variety of stories, so here is them arranged in categories. Some are cross- referenced. So a James/Lily may appear in Marauder or Canon Romance
A Second Chance
First Date Disaster
Flying, Fair Play and the Need for a Firm Hand
It Takes a Wolf to Prank a Dog
Learning to Fly
O.W.L.s, Quidditch and the Added Distraction of Sirius Black
Peace in Heaven
Ribbons, not Strings
Sixth Time's the Charm
Thank you for your time, Professor
The Lions of Gryffindor
The Lions of Gryffindor
The Sum of the Whole
Who's That Girl?
Wormtail on the Hogwarts Express
'i'before 'e' (Percy/Audrey)
A Prize Above Rubies (Isla Black/Bob Hitchens)
Apparently Asleep (Remus/Tonks)
Birthday Girl (George/Angelina)
Bound in the Beating of Each Other’s Hearts (Narcissa/Lucius)
Coup de Foudre (Bill/Fleur)
Dancing Queen (James/Lily)
First Date Disaster (James/Lily)
Five weeks (Remus/Tonks)
Forces of Nature (Ron/Hermione)
Forever Dancing (Alice/Frank)
In The Stars (Draco/Astoria)
Key of the Door (Ron/Hermione)
Kissing the Joy as it Flies (Seamus/Lavender)
March Madness (James/Lily)
Not Quite Perfect (Bill/Fleur)
Sixth Time’s the Charm (James/Lily)
Snowball Fights (Teddy/Victoire)
Until Death (Eaters) Do Us Part (Draco/Astoria)
You Dance Divinely (George/Angelina)
Non (or rather tweaked) Canon (apart from one story, these don’t break any canon.)
Better than Chocolate (Charlie/Tonks)
Heat of Life (Harry/Katie)
Her Tomorrows (Harry/Parvati)
Lavender, blue- A Gryffindor True (Lavender/Blaise)
Love At First Strike (Angelina/Terry)
Orphans of the Storm (Seamus/Parvati/Dean)
Passion Among the Primroses (Arthur/Mafalda)
Predictions of Love (Gilderoy/Sybil)
Ribbons, not Strings (Remus/Rosmerta)
Stars or Carousels (James/Dominique)
Summer’s Heat (Sirius/OC)
Teenage Witch (Charity/Myron Wagtail )
The Happy Couple (Harry/Ginny, Blaise/Lavender)
The Only One (Lavender/Blaise Teddy/Victoire)
The Untrodden Path (Draco/Hannah)
Where We Started From (Dean/Ginny)
Same sex Pairings
Apple-bobbing ( Lisa/Susan)
Close Your Eyes (Hermione/Lavender)
Drowning, not Waving (Oliver/Cedric)
Eyes That Know Me (Scorpius/Hugo)
Forbidden Colours (Tracey/Demelza)
The Dance We Do (Bellatrix/Amelia)
The Hat that Thinks it’s a Chair (Justin/Theo)
Truth Or Dare (Cormac/Zacharias)
Aberforth Dumbledore: A Love that Dare not Bleat its Name
Lockhart, Sprout and Two Smoking Goblets
Passion Among the Primroses
Predictions of Love
The Bacchus Book
Vampire - Ghost Child!
A Prize Above Rubies
Aberforth Dumbledore: A Love that Dare not Bleat its Name
An Outstretched Hand
Others (General, D/A, Post Hogwarts, Next Gen)
A Tangled Web (D/A)
All in the Genes (NG)
Chasing the Scoop! (Post Hogwarts)
Christmas on the Outside (General/Trio era)
Dean Thomas and the Reiver Curse (Post Hogwarts)
Diavol (Remus Trio Era)
Every Breath You Take (Post Hogwarts/Next Gen)
Forever Dancing (Alice/Frank)
Friends in Unlikely Places (Post Hog. Hermione)
Growing Old Disgracefully (Post Hog)
Lavender, blue (Trio Era)
Mere Wisps of Light (Post Hog. Draco fic)
Muggles, Magic and Misconceptions (Next Gen)
My Funny Valentine (Post Hogwarts)
Staring into the Fire (Trio Era)
The Waiting Game (D/A)
Whispers from the Past (Next Gen)
The Foolhardy Boys and Parvati, too
Who’s that Girl?
As They Watch
Celestina's Songbook: Christmas Edition, Volume 1
Fairytale of Hogwarts
I Believed in Lily Evans
Master Barty Regrets
Queen of My Heart
The Daydream Pedlar's Song
The Labyrinth Mind
Summary: Renee Madison is the new student who is good at magic and has an independent attitude.
Edward Bones is a seventh year who is confident about who he is and what he wants.
The become friends easily, but when a Christmas Ball is held, they both find that there is a stronger form of magic than either had expected.
I am GinervaPotter213 of Hufflepuff with my entry for the Melting a Winter Heart prompt from the MNFF Beta Boards.
This is a good story. I do admire writers who can write with total conviction using OCs. I can't seem to do that at all. I like Renee and Edward very much. I'm definitely going to read the rest of this when it gets validated.
I do have some nitpicks. *sorry being Scrooge*
Some of your language is quite American. I know Renee is American, so that's fine but I don't think Edward would refer to the holiday as 'break'. “My mum says that you can come over break. If you want,” he added, looking hopeful.
He'd be more likely to say "come over the Christmas holiday." Sorry, that's very minor - it's the Brit in me.
The other nitpick is that you've got the characters 'rolling their eyes' quite a bit. Be careful, because if a phrase is overused, it loses its impact. It hasn't yet but I would try not to use it too much. There's a certain character in the banned book *grins* that is continually rolling his eyes and after a while it detracts from the story.
I did enjoy this and am looking forward to the Yule Ball. Carole xxx
Author's Response: Hey Carole.
Thanks for the advice on Brit-speak. I appreciate it, as I'm not British myself. And I don't think that I've got everyone rolling their eyes quite as much in the next two chapters :]
Thanks for the review! *hugs*
Summary: A little yellow poem you might construe as you desire.
I'm imagining Molly and Arthur. The first oart of the poem is before the Battle of Hogwarts, and the latter after Fred died and perhaps there were no Weasley children living at home. Well, that's what I'm imagining, and it's making me just a little bit sad.
It's rare that I find a free verse poem that flows as well as this. Initially, I wasn't sure about the lack of capitalisation at the beginning of the lines, but then that would have interrupted the flow and made the rhythm jolting. Basically, leave it the way it is because it's wonderful.
The other reason this reminded me of Molly and Arthur is because it is so food orientated and Molly is so often associated with the kitchen (she's the provider of stews, cakes and large breakfasts). I love the food related imagery as well - the golden notes, thick as clotted cream - just perfect.
If this is Molly and Arthur, then I hope they get back to discovering some happiness - it all seems rather empty for them. Hopefully they'll have grandchildren coming to stay, or perhaps they just need time to adjust and find each other again.
Oh, I'm a bit sad now. This poem has made me think, very much, and that's quite rare for a fic - let alone a poem.
Thank you! ~Carole~
Summary: Harry has seen many Christmases; some of them were cruel and cold, others were what a Christmas should be – a holiday of love, celebrated with family and friends.
Will this year be as bright as the best Christmases Harry has experienced? Or will the memories of decades back close in on him?
OH! OH! OH! I get to marry James SIRIUS Potter! YES!
Seriously, Bine, this is a lovely story. I was reading it and smiling all the way through and then you snuck in a mention of the Dursleys and I started to feel all sad. I adored your house-elf and these lines stuck out particularly.
I turned around, facing the small creature. Her big pale eyes reminded me of Kreacher, but her dressing style was very similar to Dobby’s; right now, she was wearing an old skirt of Lily’s, its colour not at all matching the bright green shirt she was dressed in and which had been a Christmas present to her from Ginny years back already. She loved the cloth to pieces and cared for it with a dedication that was only surpassed by the love and care she had shown towards our children.
Weeny nit-pick (and I feel very scrooge-like for saying this)
br> ‘The Healer forbid travelling at all if her condition doesn’t change.’ I think that should be forbade.
This is a great Christmas present but I do hope my feckless husband saves some of that Pinot Noir for me!
Author's Response: *gigglesnortygiggle* I'm glad you like it. :) And no, it's not scrooge-like for you to nitpick. Thank you for the lovely review. Merry Christmas.
Summary: Nine year-old Snape is all alone and hungry...
What a brilliant story. You've really portrayed how miserable Snape's life is with his parents. Finding the honey - and then his reaction to it - was masterful.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it... it was a very random story I think I typed in ten minutes (based upon bad personal experience with honey). ;)
Summary: “I’m not spending these holidays with you. Have fun being miserable’ is what he really said,’ Tonks thought as an ice cold feeling chilled her heart and her body.
In the midst of a blizzard, Tonks stood in a woods, deciding if she could go home. Home, a place with her mother, who left her family when Tonks was nine years old. Home, a place where Sirius would never visit her again. Home, a place where her heart did not dwell and where her thoughts could not rest.
To be staring at her house, though, had been a difficult journey. Through a pile of work, a blizzard, and a meeting with a handsome stranger, Tonks found herself wondering if she could go home.
But during these holidays, Tonks must confront the past and realize where her home truly lies.
Wow! What a story, MorganRay. I'm glad I picked this up in the review circle. I'm a huge Remus/Tonks fan and this is a totally new take on them - well not so much them but Tonks' relationship with her mum is wonderful.
‘I don’t think of you as damaged. You’re more than your curse,’ Tonks hollered, and then, Remus grabbed her by the arm and drug her behind the Burrow’s shed so they couldn’t be seen. Tonks scowled and said, ‘Are you afraid I’ll make a scene?’
These lines, for me, just encapsulate Tonks and Remus so brilliantly. Fabulous!
I liked Bjorn, he was intriguing. I must look out for him
Okay I do have some nit-picks. basically, there'sd a few Amercanisms that I noticed. 'Mom' for 'Mum' 'asses' for 'arses' and 'panty hose'. We don't have panty hose in Britain - we say tights. However that's all really, really mionr and I'm only saying it because I'm being a pedantic English Chick!
Great story and your characterisation of Tonks was spot on! Carole xxx
Author's Response: Yeah, my British isn't quite up to par, I know. I can't believe I let 'mom' slip through. I guess I tried to really encapsulate the relationship in the last scene where they play in the rain. My whole idea is that Remus runs away from that moment while Tonks embraces it. Also, Bjorn appears in Winter's Last Chill, and I kind of brought him back in because he was the perfect OC for that moment. Thanks!
Summary: Fred Weasley’s death left a hole in everyone’s hearts. Fred is given the chance to visit his family to help them with their grief. Follow his visits to each of his family members.
Oh, Terri, you know I love this story and even though I've read this chapter before, I still got a shiver down my spine at this point.
“Are you ever going to stop blaming yourself?” came a voice from the shadows.
Percy is so often seen as just a pompous prat that it's nice to see him written with a bit of depth. I love that even though he's feeling guilty and sad, he still manages to get annoyed with Fred at the end.
Lovely story. Carole xxx
Ahhh, I love this story. I'm so glad all the ghosts got a chance to see their family and friends. Your Albus is brilliant. So perfectly wise and I love the line that Fred is happy to have his friendship. He seems to have accepted his death now.
Hmm, nitpick - I bet you're waiting for this one. Nymphadora!. I think Ghost!Tonks would have given him hell for that. Also I wondered why Ginny was playing Seeker, when I thought she liked being Chaser. (Did I miss something in an earlier chapter?)
Lovely to see Sirius misbehaving - ah, what a man!
Now, if my theory about Peeves getting worse depending on the mischief-makers who inhabit Hogwarts at the time, I can't imagine the chaos if Gred and Forge had been there with the Marauders.
Lovely story, Terri. I will keep this in my favourites file.
Summary: Sirius and Regulus steal themselves away and have an excursion towards the suburbs of London. What awaits the brothers?
Me again, Bine,
I loved this in the Brawl and I love your extended version. Regulus taking Sirius' hand at the end is so touching. As a Londoner, I always picture Grimmauld Place in Kensington and this journey could well have been to my own Lon don suburb (I knew I'd met him!). You have a wonderful turn of phrase and your use of description is excellent. I do have one or two nit picks.
an underground came in, - you mean and underground train.
And the station nearest to our house was one of London’s underground net.
I think it would read better if you wrote, And the station nearest our house was part of London's underground net.
The red wagons ran past, and even after the last wagon was gone, the play of light tricked my eyes and mind to see more and more wagons. It looked like magic, this illusion in red. Muggles, though, would surely describe this phenomenon as solely science. They had no sense for the beauty of magic. Wow! That line is amazing.
Author's Response: Thank you, Carole. :) LOL
I love getting reviews from you. Short, precise, but with so many SPEW qualities. Shame you haven't yet applied. *hugs* I'll look into the corrections of your nitpicks.
I like this story. I like it a lot. You have managed to convey so much longing from both of them. It had me, the reader, urging them to kiss far sooner than they actually did. You held the tension and interest superbly.
I like Daniel, too. He seems fun. I guess I should scoot over and read the other story in the hope he's in that. I like the interplay between him and Scorpius.
I do have a small nit pick, and it's purely a personal one.
‘You’ve got to understand how confronting it is for me,' . I'm not sure about the word 'confronting'. It doesn't seem to make sense but then I do understand what you're saying; I just don't think 'confronting' is an adjective. 'Confrontational' perhaps?
Great one-shot and you should definately write more of this. They're a nicely totured pair and the Ron/Draco dynamic will be amazing in your hands.
Author's Response: Aw thanks, Carole. Unfortunately, I didn't think of Daniel until this one shot. I would have liked to have had him in Reluctant Love, but oh well. You have a point about 'confronting'. I'll have a think about it. :) You're right, it would be good to involve Ron and Draco somewhere along the line. Thanks for the review! ~ Cassie
Summary: Dominique has always loved Teddy. The only problem? So has her sister...
What a glorious story. There are so many lines that I want to pick out as my favourites, but then that would mean me writing my own one-shot as a review. For now I'll content myself with:
She’s the sun, and I’m just the pinprick of a laser.
I love her interraction with Bill. And the fact that he does understand his daughter only too well gives me hope that she'll get over Teddy some day. She has to, otherwise life would just be too cruel for her.
The other part of the story that I really liked was when Teddy followed her out and told her how amazing she is. We've had Dominiques side of the story; her view on how fantastic Victoire is, and then we see Teddy telling her that she is too amazing for him. WOW!
Okay, one samll nit pick.
I figured that Teddy and Victoire would all apart. I think you mean 'fall' and not 'all'.
I adore your writing. You have a wonderful turn of phrase and convey so much in so few words. What I particularly love about this, and some of your other one-shots, is the way you really grab the interest of the reader and manage to keep our interest until the very end.
Ellie has always been green-eyed with jealousy over her older sister’s ability to do magic, and Marie has always taken pleasure in flaunting her magic in her younger sister’s face.
Refusing to acknowledge her own feelings, Ellie can’t help wondering, what was this feeling in the pit of her stomach, which only came when Marie was near?
It’s all left to Ben, the older brother, to sort everything out. But will Ellie ever manage to see the simple pleasures found in watching, or will her jealousy never go away?
This is an extraordinary story. I think everyone that reads the Harry Potter books feels like Ellie. We all long to do magic too (How many of you out there waited for your Hogwarts letter?), but for us poor Muggles it will never happen.
You know something, it really made me feel sorry for poor old Petunia having Lily as a sister.
I adored this line:
She has long, pin-straight, midnight-black hair, which shines and shimmers constantly with never a hair out of place. At Christmas time, when we were younger, she used to make fairy lights appear in her hair, using her magic. It sounds cheesy, but it truly made her hair look like a dark night sky, with the stars shining clearly, lighting up the world. Oh, I'd love to have hair like that. You've managed to give Marie, Mary-Sue type looks but in a totally non-Mary-Sue way. We don't see much of Marie, but we don't like her much.
Well I've been trying to find nit picks but I can't. This is a lovely tale.
Congratulations on your first validation; the first of many, I'm sure.
Author's Response: Haha, you know, my cousin used to read Harry Potter. And when he turned eleven, I sent him a letter that he had got into Hogwarts. But he saw right through it :( I used the wrong colour ink.. [sighs]
You know, I must say, I've always felt extreemly sorry for Petunia. It isn't any wonder she ened up the way she did.
Thank you :) I was pretty proud of my discription in this story, actually. So I think that was my favourite part too :).
Thank you :) -Lex
Summary: The year is 1979 and the Marauders are out of school and working for the Order. One Marauder is about to get married, one is finding life outside school harder than even he expected, one is about to turn traitor and one is about to fall in love.
When Sirius Black flew away from the two Muggle policemen with James Potter on the back of his motorbike, he didn’t know he was about to come face to face with the one person who could change everything.
Abigail Sampson was a shy, unassuming girl when she went to school at Hogwarts. She was friends with Lily Evans, but not the Marauders. She graduated and went to work for the Ministry. What very few people knew was she also went to work for the Order.
What happens when this shy girl finds herself working with one Sirius Black to discover the truth behind his brother’s disappearance? Could this quiet girl hold her own with the legendary Sirius Black? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This story starts immediately after J. K. Rowling’s prequel which she wrote for charity. If you can find a copy to read, I would suggest reading it before reading this story. Of course, you don’t need to read it to understand this story, but you may feel as if you missed something in the beginning of this story. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By the end there will be a slight hint at Alternate Universe. I believe what happens in this story was possible, but it strays a bit from what we know of in canon. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is the prequel to my story The Unknown Heir. Though both stand on their own.
I love this! You have perfectly captured a moment after the prequel. Well done and so original. Your characterisation of the Marauders is, as ever, perfect. And you know how much I like my Marauders. Lily and Albus were good too. James and Sirius don't quite realise how much trouble they're in, do they?
As Sirius walked out of the kitchen, James pulled Lily into his arms. He knew her fears were justified. The sad part was, there was nothing he could say or do to alleviate her fears. Working for the Order was dangerous, just as it was the right thing to do, and he planned on continuing. This line just about says it all. It stopped me smiling because I remembered that they were working in a dangeous world.
Okay two nit picks. One, I'm afraid, is a pet peeve, so feel free to ignore.
So that’s why we haven’t gotten an owl from the Ministry yet.
'Gotten' is very much an American word. We don't use it in Britland and Sirius certainly wouldn't have used it in that era.
When we the two of you realise you are not invincible?
I think you mean 'will' not 'we'.
Minor, minor quibbles in a wonderful story. Are we going to get an insight into Wormtail's betrayal? Or will we find out why Sirius and Remus mistrusted each other?
Summary: Born to and raised by the Hawthorn family, Melody and her sister are everything a respected Pureblood family could ask for. However, when Belladonna is sent to Beauxbatons, Melody is faced with the prospect of entering Hogwarts alone.
Fully expecting to be placed in Slytherin or Ravenclaw, Melody is given the shock of her life when she becomes a Hufflepuff.
With her sister in another country, her family miles away, and friends no longer talking to her due to the disgrace of being placed in another House, Melody has never felt so alone. To top that, the people surrounding her are from social backgrounds completely contradicting of her own. People she never expected to spare a second glance, she is forced to live with: Muggleborns and Halfbloods.
Everything that she has ever been taught or led to believe is being challenged. All that her parents have told her is being proved wrong, and Melody no longer knows what to believe. Everything is completely unfamiliar, and she is scared she may be changing. But Melody needs to learn that sometimes change can be a good thing. And sometimes, it can be exceptional.
This is intriguing. I like the characterisation of the twins. Everything seems to be very correct, very perfect, in their world. But you can already see signs that Melody isn't quite so correct. She's not content to let her sister write the letter; she has to disturb her.
I'm a bit...err...iffy on the choice of house elf name, simply because Sambo has some racist connotations from the 30's, but I'm sure you weren't aware of them at the time (especially when we discussed the name - eeek).
One other nit-pick, (although it actually fits with the story so might not be an error)
hair prefect, blank expression.
Do you mean 'perfect'. It's funny because 'prefect' fits in a Percy Weasley type of way.
All in all, I think this is a great beginning. Your description of the room is lovely and the two girls are beautifully set up for any future tension.
After all, it would not do to disrespect the Master of the house. That line sent shivers through me. Carole xxx
Author's Response: Haha, thank you, Carole. I love your reveiws.
Uh, I don't really want to change the name of the elf, simply because I have none other. But I honestly had no idea [blushes]. Oh dear. Sorry.
Yes, lol, that was an error. I have no idea what prefect hair would be. Haha.
Thank you :) -Lex
Intriguing story. At last I understand why she didn't marry Savaric. I enjoyed this very much. The tension throughout the tale is very well spun. I also enjoyed the characterisation of the pair.
I do have some nit picks:
and that she had learned playing it by her brother. To me this reads a touch awkwardly. I would rephrase it to something like 'and that she had been taught by her brother' or 'and that she had learned playing with her brother'
If you would like to play again, without the attitude,
I think that the phrase 'without the attitude' is an anachronism. It seems far too modern for someone like Isla Black. In my opinion, she'd be more likely to say 'If you would like to play again without this aggressive attitude' or, perhaps, 'without the harsh manner'.
Good story, though. I wanted to punch Savaric's smirk off his face at the end and it's not often I get so involved in a story - especially a one shot. Carole xxx
Author's Response: lol Carole. And thanks a lot for the review. I'll look into the sentences you nitpicked.
Summary: In James and Lily’s seventh year, everything changes. A war has begun, N.E.W.T.s are approaching, and James is suddenly acting like a whole new person. Lily doesn't know what to think or feel anymore, but it may well be that the events of one moonlit night on the grounds, combined with a dash of Greek mythology, will settle her head and her heart once and for all.
What a fantastic story. I love the way you've incorporated the Greek myth in it. And Lily's line: Maybe Artemis didn’t mean to be so cruel… is a masterstroke. Mary is portrayed well, although it's a small part, I felt a good connection to her, as someone that Lily would have trusted. I thought Sirius nicking all the bacon was very funny - I do hope she got her own back.
I have a few minor - eeeny weeny nitpics. Firstly, it should be Defence not Defense because they're at school in Britain and secondly, Mary's surname is actually Macdonald without the capital D. Really, really nitpicky of me to mention it, in what was otherwise a wonderful story and a great read. I hope to see a lot more.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your wonderful review!! I'm glad you enjoyed my portrayal of Mary and Sirius - this is the first fic I've written with canon characters, so it was a challenge to keep them from getting OOC. I'll go fix Mary's surname right now. As for changing 'defense' to 'defence,' I'm still internally debating it, because J.K. actually spells it the American way in the American versions (which are the ones I've always read). Anyway, I feel kind of fake when I use British spellings in my writing, since I'm American. But I haven't decided yet; I may very well change my mind tomorrow. Thanks again for taking the time to read and review!
Your relationship with Fred existed almost entirely within a broom cupboard.
You and Fred: a Hufflepuff and a Gryffindor, two complementary souls. In a world where nothing is certain, you find comfort in a dusty third-floor storage room.
OHH! Chelsea, I've only just discovered this. Well, that's a lie. I'd heard it was good, but this is the first time I actually read it .. and it's wonderful. Your Hufflepuff is so real in this. We don't discover her name, but she is so alive. Well done! What I think I like best about this story is the fact that it's not a mushy type of fluffy love and the heroine admits that it's not really love. That is such an honest things to write.
Oh, a bitter, bittersweet love story,. heartrending, heartbreaking and just beautiful. Can't possibly enthuse anymore but it did make me cry. ~Carole~
Author's Response: ♥ Thanks, Carole! I don't know what to say, but *blushes*. I'm glad you liked it!
Summary: Everybody has dreams, and Lily is no different. She has grown up reading the same Fairy tale stories and has started dreaming about her Prince Charming. What she doesn't know is that her prince is right in front of her always asking her out. She continues refusing going out with James until the dream shows her that her prince is James.
A James/Lily one shot, which ends with a kiss.
"Ahh, you see, I can be a nice sensitive bloke at times. I wasn't nicking her bag, as you so accurately guessed and no ... I wasn't about to gill it with newts eyes or any of that stuff that padfoot was thinking."
"Oy! Prongs. Leave me out of this. I didn't dare suggest such a thing. Nice snog you got there from the lovely Lily. Shame she hadn't brushed her hair or anything, but , well, I don't suppose you were bothered by that.
"Bothered, course not. It's not every day that the girl you've been pining for launches herself at you in such an unexpected way and then snogs the life out of you ... and all this before breakfast."
"Or beakfast, as Afifa wrote which might be something completely different."
"Moony, you are such a kill-joy. Leave the nitpicks back in the trunk where they belong."
"All right, Padfoot, keep your long hair on. I was just pointing out ..."
"Well don't. It was a wonderful story, and the way Afifa wrote about my dream was beautiful. I'd wuite forgotten that. Ahh, I used to wonder who my handsome prince was."
"Didn't you honestly know it was me?"
"Hmm, well for a long time I rather hoped it was David Cassidy... but ... I suppose you'll do, Potter."
Guys, will you get out of here, and take that cheese-eating traitor with you. Afifa, my dear, that was a great story. I LOVE that Lily took control and kissed him, and James was very IC - totally surprised by her sudden volte-face. Loved it! Technically, the description in the dream was great. I really felt as if I were in a magical world. Well Done ~Carole~
Author's Response: Hahaha. XD Have I mentioned to you, Carole, how much I love you? Lol. Well, now I am, ily. :D
You know I had to look up the Cassidy guy. >.> He's good looking... maybe. I guess he must have been considered hot in the olden times. What's it, 60 years? lol. You've done your research though. I'm impressed. :D
I'm glad you liked the one shot, hon! :D And thank you for pointing out the typo. And for the comments and the lovely review! :D
Summary: Rosmerta finds that life is much more monotonous than she thought-- all until Sirius Black shows up in the middle of the night and shows her simplicity is what life's all about.
Other Pairing: Sirius/Rosmerta
Written for the Slytherin Co-Author Valentine's Day Challenge by Mistletoe and Rhi for HP.
This is a good story. Poor Rosmerta, barmaids/landladies have a rotten life at times. I'm glad Sirius was able to bring some light into her life. As a side note, I was equally pleased to discover that she looks like me - short and with brown eyes - I knew I was his type!(and I used to be a barmaid)
“Nourishmenus summonus, foodus conjurus,” That line made me giggle along with Rosmerta.
The use of the word 'baseboards' is not one I'm familiar with - is it the same as 'skirting boards' - minor britpick there - sorry.
Seriously though, what I like about this story is that you haven't gone down the cliched Sirius-as-sexual-predator route. He's nice to her and although they're indulging in a mild flirtation it's just a very brief (but gorgeous) kiss.
Author's Response: Thanks, Carole! I'm going to go ahead and give Rhi the credit for that line. It made me giggle too when I read it :D And thanks for the Britpick... I'll look into editing that. I was rather happy with the Sirius we wrote because it's so easy to go too far in both directions with him,.... he was at a pretty happy medium here :D Thanks for the review!
Summary: When Cupid's wayward arrow is shot into a crowd of Slytherins, Gryffindors and Muggles, Lily Evans' life gets very complicated.
This is eternalangel from Ravenclaw that is submitting this to the Cupid Gone Crazy challenge.
This is an interesting and fun story for the Valentine's challenge. I really like the pairing of Lily and Regulus - that's novel. Lucius and Petunia made me laugh - especially when she calls him pookie. (LOL)
I do have some nit picks. First, Molly Prewett was Molly Weasley - she had Bill in 1970 and Lily's second year begins September 1972 (this is me being a canon nut!). Secondly, Alice wouldn't have been Alice Longbottom because that's her married name. Thirdly, Bellatrix wasn't at school the same time as Lily - she was ten years older. Sorry these are all very minor canon things and they don't, by any means, ruin what is essentially a funny story.
Regulus fixed his eyes on Lily, those unforgettable grays, and a faint blush tinged his cheeks. I love this line so much. Regulus comes across as such a well rounded character and Lily seems very interested in him.
My favourite bits are the dialogue between Petunai and Lucius. So OOC, but just how they'd be like if hit by arrows.
Author's Response: Thank you very, very much for my first review. I shall go back and fix some of the canon mistakes (I can't believe I named Alice with her married name...). I really appreciate the feedback and will fix what I can (though I don't know if I can work Bellatrix out of the story).
Summary: Remus Lupin and Potions class have never been the best of friends. And then he brews something unusual... “It’s like some kind of liquid Imperius! You tell me to do something and I want to do it!” Sirius shouted.
I MUST have swallowed some of the Potion. I need to review... Very clever story. You've characterised all the Marauders brilliantly and it's good to see a Remus who's standing up to his friends. Peter's good as well, not a tagalong or a total idiot, but a proper Marauder.
I do have a slight nit-pick, but it's more a peeve of mine, so feel free to ignore. I'm not keen on the Remus/chocolate references. The reason he handed out chocolate in POA was because he knew his Dementor remedies - it doesn't mean he was a chocoholic. I think it's turned into a bit of a fanfiction cliche.
That aside, this was very funny to read, and I couldn't stop grinning all the way through. Fabulous!
Author's Response: I'm glad you found it funny--and that you were compelled to review! Oh, I know why Remus gave Harry the chocolate, and I know it's a fandom cliche, but hey--chocolate makes me feel better during certain times of the month, so why wouldn't it work for a werewolf? (Wink) I don't always use that cliche, but it just--happened. (And I didn't know if I could say, "He's taken along his caffeine pills."). Anyhow, I'm glad you liked it--it was a lot of fun for me to write! Thanks for the kind words! Diane