Penname: Equinox Chick [Contact]
Real name: Carole
Member Since: 05/10/08
Website:
Beta-reader: No
Status: Member
Bio:
What can I say. I live in London and am obsessed with a teenage wizard and his friends. Am I mad? Probably Do I care? Hell no!
EDIT: Grown? Um, probably not

For my first foray into the realms of fanfiction I've chosen to write about the Marauders. I'll always stick fairly closely to canon as I think JK knows best. Although I've enjoyed reading about other ships I, personally, don't think I could write with conviction about Ginny/Crabbe or Hermione/Mclaggan relationships.

EDIT: ha ha ha ha ha - How I have changed! I'm now firmly in the rare-pair, SSP, and things that aren't quite conventional camp, although I still loves me some James/Lily.

My second chaptered fic (Apparently Asleep) has started a love affair with Tonks/Remus and confirmed my obsession for all things Sirius. *sigh*

I am indebted to Terri (mudbloodproud) for being a great beta and all round amazing person. If it hadn't been for her encouragement I would have thrown in the towel many months ago.

EDIT: I have made a lot of wonderful friends during my past three years on MNFF, including (in no particular order) Natalie, Kara, Hannah/Bob, Jess, Gina, Lea, Lori, Julia, Minna, Emmahhhh, and the fantabulous BB.

I hope Mugglenet and you enjoy reading my words as much as I've enjoyed writing them. Huge thank-you to my niece, Amanda, for being one of the first to catch the Harry Potter bug and nagging me into reading them.


I’ve written a variety of stories, so here is them arranged in categories. Some are cross- referenced. So a James/Lily may appear in Marauder or Canon Romance

EDIT: I haven't written much Harry Potter fanfiction for a while. It is unlikely I'll update the two chaptered fics I first started as they became a little too long and unwieldy. Sorry about that.

Marauder
A Second Chance
Contemplating Lilies
Dancing Queen
First Date Disaster
Flying, Fair Play and the Need for a Firm Hand
It Takes a Wolf to Prank a Dog
Juggling
Learning to Fly
March Madness
O.W.L.s, Quidditch and the Added Distraction of Sirius Black
Peace in Heaven
Ribbons, not Strings
Sixth Time's the Charm
Thank you for your time, Professor
The Lions of Gryffindor
The Lions of Gryffindor
The Sum of the Whole
Veils
Who's That Girl?
Wormtail on the Hogwarts Express



Canon Romance
'i'before 'e' (Percy/Audrey)
A Prize Above Rubies (Isla Black/Bob Hitchens)
Acorns (Bill/Fleur)
Apparently Asleep (Remus/Tonks)
Birthday Girl (George/Angelina)
Bound in the Beating of Each Other’s Hearts (Narcissa/Lucius)
Coup de Foudre (Bill/Fleur)
Dancing Queen (James/Lily)
First Date Disaster (James/Lily)
Five weeks (Remus/Tonks)
Forces of Nature (Ron/Hermione)
Forever Dancing (Alice/Frank)
In The Stars (Draco/Astoria)
Key of the Door (Ron/Hermione)
Kissing the Joy as it Flies (Seamus/Lavender)
March Madness (James/Lily)
Not Quite Perfect (Bill/Fleur)
Reconnaissance (Remus/Tonks)
Sixth Time’s the Charm (James/Lily)
Snowball Fights (Teddy/Victoire)
Until Death (Eaters) Do Us Part (Draco/Astoria)
Veils (James/Lily)
You Dance Divinely (George/Angelina)



Non (or rather tweaked) Canon (apart from one story, these don’t break any canon.)

Better than Chocolate (Charlie/Tonks)
Heat of Life (Harry/Katie)
Her Tomorrows (Harry/Parvati)
High (Scorpius/Lily)
Lavender, blue- A Gryffindor True (Lavender/Blaise)
Love At First Strike (Angelina/Terry)
Mirrors (Charlie/Penelope)
Misperception (Oliver/Cedric/Daphne)
Orphans of the Storm (Seamus/Parvati/Dean)
Passion Among the Primroses (Arthur/Mafalda)
Predictions of Love (Gilderoy/Sybil)
Ribbons, not Strings (Remus/Rosmerta)
Shrouds (Hermione/Draco)
Snapdragons (Charlie/OC)
Stars or Carousels (James/Dominique)
Summer’s Heat (Sirius/OC)
Swans (Mollyjnr/OC)
Teenage Witch (Charity/Myron Wagtail )
The Happy Couple (Harry/Ginny, Blaise/Lavender)
The Only One (Lavender/Blaise Teddy/Victoire)
The Untrodden Path (Draco/Hannah)
Where We Started From (Dean/Ginny)



Same sex Pairings
Apple-bobbing ( Lisa/Susan)
Close Your Eyes (Hermione/Lavender)
Drowning, not Waving (Oliver/Cedric)
Eyes That Know Me (Scorpius/Hugo)
Forbidden Colours (Tracey/Demelza)
Fracture (Theo/Justin)
Monochrome (Sirius/Remus)
The Dance We Do (Bellatrix/Amelia)
The Hat that Thinks it’s a Chair (Justin/Theo)
Truth Or Dare (Cormac/Zacharias)



Humour
Aberforth Dumbledore: A Love that Dare not Bleat its Name
Lockhart, Sprout and Two Smoking Goblets
Passion Among the Primroses
Predictions of Love
The Bacchus Book
Vampire - Ghost Child!

Historical
A Prize Above Rubies
Aberforth Dumbledore: A Love that Dare not Bleat its Name
An Outstretched Hand
Shadows Deep

Others (General, D/A, Post Hogwarts, Next Gen)
A Tangled Web (D/A)
All in the Genes (NG)
Chasing the Scoop! (Post Hogwarts)
Christmas on the Outside (General/Trio era)
Dean Thomas and the Reiver Curse (Post Hogwarts)
Diavol (Remus Trio Era)
Every Breath You Take (Post Hogwarts/Next Gen)
Forever Dancing (Alice/Frank)
Friends in Unlikely Places (Post Hog. Hermione)
Growing Old Disgracefully (Post Hog)
High (NG)
Lavender, blue (Trio Era)
Mere Wisps of Light (Post Hog. Draco fic)
Muggles, Magic and Misconceptions (Next Gen)
My Funny Valentine (Post Hogwarts)
Staring into the Fire (Trio Era)
The Waiting Game (D/A)
Whispers from the Past (Next Gen)



Mysteries
The Foolhardy Boys and Parvati, too
Who’s that Girl?
Xanthe Interrupted
Zeitgeist



Poetry
Askew
As They Watch
Beyond Beseeching
Celestina's Songbook: Christmas Edition, Volume 1
Cold Dreams
Draco's Journey
Enslaved
Fairytale of Hogwarts
Flying High
Forever France
Frozen Silence
Hexed!
Hey, brother
I Believed in Lily Evans
Master Barty Regrets
Phoenix Flames
Queen of My Heart
Sirius, Baby
The Daydream Pedlar's Song
The Four
The Labyrinth Mind
Unreconciled

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Reviews by Equinox Chick
 

Watching From A Distance by Gmariam
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 7]

Summary: Past Featured StoryScorpius Malfoy is celebrating the end of seventh year when he runs into a former girlfriend. She brings him over to the Gryffindor table, where he finally interacts with someone he's been watching for a while, someone he thinks about far too often. Their interaction and future plans give him hope, but the night ends with a crushing reminder that he wants someone he cannot have.

Categories: Next Generation Genre: Warnings: Sexual Situations, Slash, Substance Abuse

Word count: 4139 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/01/11 Updated: 06/01/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 06/02/11 Title: Chapter 1: One Shot

You know I love this. I squeed long enough in email. Just fabulous. Sorry pathetic review, but just so you know that I wasn't lying - this is great. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks, Carole. I appreciate your help and am glad you liked it! Thanks for that conversation where it came up, I still can't believe how quickly and easily this came out. It was fun. I wonder what happens next...perhaps he runs into Hugo somewhere in Europe in a few years... ;) Thanks again! ~Gina :)

 

Picking Up the Pieces by lucca4
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 5]

Summary:

A year ago, two damaged people found they made each other whole.

Little did they know that the fault lines were still there, waiting for the right moment to break apart once more.

A companion to ‘Not Broken.’

Nominated for a 2011 QSQ - Best Non-Canon Romance

Nominated for a 2012 QSQ - Best Dark/Angsty Story

This is a birthday present for the absolutely fabulous Jess/ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor.

I owe an indefinite amount of thanks to my super speedy and gorgeously amazing beta Elen� for making this story readable.

And while we're here I should probably mention that I'm not JKR


Categories: Other Pairing Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Mental Disorders, Sexual Situations, Strong Profanity, Substance Abuse

Word count: 2439 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/02/11 Updated: 06/10/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 07/27/11 Title: Chapter 1: Picking Up the Pieces

Awww, a happy ending - sort of - well a hopeful ending at any rate and totally in keeping with the honesty of this story.

Ariana, this is a gorgeous piece of writing. From the first sentence about her nails leaving indents on his back, I was utterly drawn in. I really felt for both characters and wept a bit for their baby.

If I had to quibble about something it would be that I'd like to read more about how they got together especially as they were on opposite sides, although I realise that would take you into the realms of a chaptered fic (so get to it!)

HA! I've realised that Blaise is just like me thinking that Theo's gay. That particular memory made me giggle, a slightly lighter moment in a very poignant fic.

I hope they get their happy ending.

Lovely story ~Carole~

Author's Response: You are so lovely for reviewing this! Thank you :). I am very happy you liked it even though it wasn't totally happy in the end. If you want to read how they got together you should read "Not Broken" which is what inspired this piece (although the writing is ghastly). Theo has been written as gay a lot so I wanted to add that little bit in to make sure everyone knows that in this story NO he's not gay because he has to be with Susan who is not a man. As for their happy endingI really should make the most of the last bit of free time I have this summer. Thanks again! xx Ariana

 

Facades by lucca4
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 7]

Summary: Past Featured Story

When a lavish engagement party ends in tragedy, Teddy Lupin takes on the case, despite its personal ties. What begins as a search for the killer soon turns into something much more, and Teddy is startled to witness the personas of the people he thought he knew melt away in light of the crime.

It doesn’t take long for him to realise that nothing is what it seems to be.

Nominated for a 2011 QSQ - Best General Fiction and Best Same Sex Pairing Story

Nominated for a 2012 QSQ - Best Same Sex Pairing Story.

This is lucca4 of Gryffindor writing for the 2011 Mysterious May Challenge in the Great Hall, Prompt 2.

Categories: Mystery Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Sexual Situations, Slash, Strong Profanity, Substance Abuse, Violence

Word count: 13473 Chapters: 4 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/06/11 Updated: 06/30/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 06/12/11 Title: Chapter 1: The Archangel

Okay, this is going to be a rubbish review because I'm a bit tired and need to go to bed, but I just wanted to say that this story is very good. You're writing - especially at the beginning between James and Teddy - is unbelievably good. Just ... wow.

Ariana, I will read and review the rest of this properly - I promise - but just to let you know that this is fab, and I'm waiting with bated breath to read more ('cept I'm tired and have to sleep.)

Well done. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Oh Carole, thank you so much! I'm very happy you liked the first chapter and everything and thanks for reviewing before you went to sleep :). It was definitely not a rubbish review--this made my day! Thank you again. xx Ariana

 

Never Let Me Go by ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 8]

Summary:

Louis Weasley had always assumed that the worst of his problems had been falling for someone he wasn't supposed to. This was, however, until that very someone turns up missing from one the biggest societal events of the century.

He was willing to break every rule and taboo to find her, but could he succeed where the entire might of the Ministry's Magical Law Enforcement Department failed?



Categories: Next Generation Genre: Warnings: Mild Profanity

Word count: 10275 Chapters: 3 Completed: No
Published:
06/07/11 Updated: 11/26/13


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 10/25/11 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 1 - A Leap of Faith

This is the best story I’ve ever read!!!!!

 

You are truly brilliant and I want to have your babies – siriusly – you’re amazing!

 

I hope you write a lot more stuff like this – makes me LOL and cry all at the same time – fab faB FAB.

 

PS: I will read this properly and review later.



Author's Response:

Why, thank you, Croll Teh BAMF Barmaid. I shall thank you even further when you actually READ the chapter, hehe.

~Jess

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 06/07/11 Title: Chapter 1: Prologue

Nooooooo! Where is she?

Jess, great start. I love the fact that this isn't just about a mystery but has a whole other subplot going on. Infact subplot isn't really the right word because it implies it's less important.

As usual, I love your take on the Weasleys. And I am interested in cousin fics having wanted to write one a while ago that didn't get past the closure of the OC class *sigh*. Anyway, I can't wait to read more. ~Carole~

Author's Response:

I knew when I started this that I wanted parallel plots. First, Lucy is obviously missing, and it hits Louis hard. Then he would inevitably have to deal with the conflict between his feelings for Lucy and his familial concern with her safety as well. I just like that sort of internal character struggle, and then a different spin on the next-gen Weasleys is always fun, hehe.

*squish* I shall run off now and write some more. :D

~Jess

 

A Touch of Ice by majestic_ginny
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 13]

Summary: Aurors Scorpius Malfoy and Albus Potter are in charge of the Kenneth Lee murder case. Smart, funny and friendly, Kenny had no enemies. There was no motive for murdering him. Then why was he found dead late at night with a severe blow to his head? The only clues are the missing ring, a cigarette stub and lots of water and blood...

As the two Aurors start investigating, they find a lot of startling pieces of evidence... and not everyone being questioned is telling the truth.

This is majestic_ginny of Hufflepuff trying to finish her fic for the 2011 Mysterious May Challenge in the Great Hall, Prompt 2, even though the challenge is over.

Categories: Mystery Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Mild Profanity, Substance Abuse, Violence

Word count: 14120 Chapters: 8 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/08/11 Updated: 07/14/12


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 07/22/11 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 4

Nooo, it's too obvious. I don't think Jerry did it. I also think that Albus is a bad choice as Deputy Head Auror. He jumps to too many conclusions. Scorpius is much, much better.

I actually think the wife did it. There are endless opportunities for PolyJuice Potion to give her an alibi. Murder weapon - hmmm, looking at the mop and the water, I have a shrewd idea, but I won't give the game away.

Um, one thing that didn;t ring true for me was Scorpius having to buy Rose an expensive diamond ring. I really can't see any Weasley child being that materialistic. Hermione would have more sense than to raise a spoiled brat.
,br> Interesting story, Nadia. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks for the review, Carole! I totally agree with you about Albus. Scorpius would have been much better; you already saw how Scorpius jokes about it. I also agree with you about the ring iin a way, but I've seen loads of nice, un-spoiled brats go crazy on seeing rare jewellery. If you look at it that way, Rose was a girl who was raised in a safe, not-dangerous environment (unlike Hermione, who had to face so many dangerous stuff). so I'm sure that like other girls she'd probably go tipsy about the pink-diamond. I know I did when I read about it in the news, though I knew I'd never get to buy it ^_^. So, Rose was just gushing on and on about it to Scorpius, who finally got annoyed and bought her another ring, hehe. :P Atleast that's my version of the story!

And as for the wife, you'll have to wait and see ;).

Once again, thanks for reviewing! *squishes* --Nadia

 

Hangman by littlebird
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 18]

Summary: Past Featured StoryOn the morning of Hermione’s 18th birthday, Ron hunts as Harry gathers. One boy is successful, while the other is not. At the end of an hour, who is to blame?

One-Shot.

This story has been nominated for the 2012 Quick Silver Quills: Best Dark/ Angst Fic



Categories: Dark/Angsty Fics Genre: Warnings: Mild Profanity

Word count: 2844 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/09/11 Updated: 06/15/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/02/12 Title: Chapter 1: One-Shot

Enjoyed this, which is a horrible thing to say when Ron is going through such agony, but you really got into his head and showed us exactly how he was feeling.

I'm trying to pick out the moments I liked best but it's a hard job. When he was about to kill the rabbit my heart was in my mouth and then I gaped at the connection with its eyes and how if it had had green eyes it would have died. So bitter, Ron.

The master stroke, I think, was the end where we realise he's not actually wearing the locket. Although I suspect its proximity still affects him, having it around his neck - like a noose, as you said - must intensify these feelings incredibly. And at that last line, I realised the reason for the title.

Great fic. ~Carole~

 

Summary: Passing a few hours in each other's company while waiting for their mates to escape detention, Sirius and Remus embarked on a good, old-fashioned game of Truth or Dare. But which one had the most potential for tension between the two: honesty, or the courage to do something that had thus far only occurred in his wildest imaginings?

Categories: Remus/Sirius Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1341 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/10/11 Updated: 06/10/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 06/11/11 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

I liked it. That's saying something because I never ship this pair unless it's in a threesome with a glamorous Hufflepuff called Carole.

I liked the banter between the pair - expecially Sirius' thoughts on girls - he's such a gentleman - NOT. I also thought the friendship was well done here. It wasn't just their attraction to each other, but there was a deep bond. of friendship as well.

A slight crit (but feel free to ignore me) is that I think they sometimes came over as a bit too adult for their age in their words, but then that's probably because the teenage boys I remember and see around London are inarticulate and can only communicate in grunts. With their friends they're probably delightful specimans - *snigger*.

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU, for not using the bloody Astronomy Tower as their meeting place at midnight. If you'd done that I think I'd have deflisted you.

Darn it, this cat still has me beat. ~Carole~

Author's Response:

I really wanted this to be a dialogue-heavy piece, which I haven't really done, like, ever. As you know, I'm far more narrative in my style, but this was a fun departure. I'm still not sure if this story is any good or not, but if I can at least create a halo of plausibility around it for your sensitive canon-shipping eyes, then it must have some redeeming quality.

As for their not-quite-right speech for their age... woops. I'm not really sure what you mean specifically, but I do know of one part that probably fits the bill. I suppose I cba to change it, lol.

Hearts, Croll, for the read, despite the totally deceptive name of the category, inflicting such slashiness on you. I shan't do so again! But I prolly will.

~Jess

 

Traitors by majestic_ginny
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 2]

Summary: The Goblins are a fierce race, known for their vicious and blood-thirsty rebellions. They do not mix well with humans. Then why are they holding a conference with all the senior members of the Ministry of Magic? Bill Weasley suspects something is going on.

What happens when the goblins revolt against the Wizards in Gringotts? Can Bill and the others escape in time?

Based on a true story.

Categories: Post-Hogwarts Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Mild Profanity, Violence

Word count: 2118 Chapters: 2 Completed: No
Published:
06/11/11 Updated: 06/22/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 06/12/11 Title: Chapter 1: Prologue: Plans

Interesting .... I can't wait to see what is going to happen. I'm worried for Kingsley, if he's the Minister. If it's Fudge, though, then I don't care - you can kill him off early -LOL.

Good start, Nadia, and an original take on a rebellion in the Magical World. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing, Carole! It really made my day! *squishes*. Sadly, the Minister is Kingsley, as the story is post Hogwarts:( ... (I'd have loved killing Fudge off, though :P). Thanks for your compliments, hon, and once again, thanks for reviewing! --Nadia

 

The Lady Hufflepuff by minnabird
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 4]

Summary: Much has been made of the rift between Gryffindor and Slytherin and Slytherin's subsequent flight from Hogwarts, but history has all but forgotten the tragic end to that night.

For, when Slytherin left, his faithful lover followed...

Tied for Best Poetry in the 2011 Quicksilver Quill Awards (!!)

Categories: Poetry Genre: Warnings: Character Death

Word count: 551 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/13/11 Updated: 06/16/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 06/25/11 Title: Chapter 1: The Lady Hufflepuff

I reallyliked this poem at the time you wrote it, Minna, and with the added verses, you've only improved it.

I know the original poem reasonably well, so I didn;t have to read it to appreciate waht an excellent job you've done with the rhyme and rhythm in this version. I also appreciate the pairing. So often we see Rowena and Salazar paired up, and Helga comes across as the dumpy one who likes cooking, but here she's a real living, breathing and loving person. *sobs*

“She’s kept her vow,” spoke Gryffindor In husky tones: “She’ll leave no more. She was the best among us four, The Lady Hufflepuff.”

My favourite set of lines. that was really lovely.

Great poem. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks! Glad you liked this poem. I think it needed the extra verses all along but I was just like "MEH get it over with" when first writing it. As for pairings - I always see Claw/Slyth and Puff/Gryff for some reason but I liked Helga/Salazar because it's more fun for the idea of loyalty which I wanted for this poem for some reason. Also - whoever says that's all there is to Hufflepuff - dumpiness and cooking - needs to get their head examined. After all, she was one of the four greatest witches and wizards at the time - and also probably the nicest. I love her "I'll take everyone and treat them just the same" philosophy. (Sorry - I am way too loyal to the fictional founder of my fictional house. -rolls eyes- Ignore my ranting). Thanks agin for the lovely review. -hugs-

 

Flight of the Beetle by voldiegirl
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 3]

Summary: A poem detailing the arc of Rita Skeeter and her mischief and mayhem.

Categories: Poetry Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 108 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/15/11 Updated: 06/16/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 11/21/11 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Hello there. I like this poem. It's simple but tells a very good story about Rita. I was impressed with the rhyming here because it doesn't seem at all forced but fllows very well.

Staring each stanza with the word 'Beetle' was a great idea. It gives the impression that we're reading about an 'it' with no personality, so when you change it to 'Skeeter' it feels far more forceful that we're reading about a woman.

Excellent poem, I enjoyed reading it. ~Carole~

 

Raindrops by Gmariam
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 248]

Summary:

He returned with a quiet sadness and a surprising new responsibility to keep him focused. She returned with a misplaced bitterness and the matching position that forced them to work with one another. Yet fear, resentment, and stubborn arrogance kept pushing them apart, even when they were meant to be together.
Winner, Quicksilver Quill for Best Canon Romance. Thank you!!


Categories: James/Lily Genre: Warnings: Mild Profanity, Sexual Situations, Substance Abuse

Word count: 88679 Chapters: 28 Completed: Yes
Published:
06/20/11 Updated: 12/20/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 07/30/11 Title: Chapter 8: Chapter Eight

No no no! Why is she angry with him now? Come on, Lily, stop being horrible and wake up to the fact that Prongs is lovely.

*sigh* This is a glorious fic. I love every second of it, but was especially impressed with Dumbledore and Remus. Yes, I just adore your Remus - he just feels so right.

The moment when James thought about his mum was so touching. I admit to my heart melting just a bit at his obvious sorrow.

You do realise that if you don;t complete this story, I will have to Crucio you.

Just sayin' ~Carole~

PS: What's wrong with you? James didn't get beaten up? Are you developing a conscience?

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 10/03/11 Title: Chapter 14: Chapter Fourteen

Awww, lovely kiss. This is a great Chapter, Gina. At last they're finally seeing each for who they really are. This is a beautiful moment, and I can quite see how it inspired the rest of your story. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks, Carole! I'm so glad you found a chance to come back and read a bit of this, it means a lot to me. I think you've probably seen the pic in one of our art chats. I really loved the artwork and still really like this moment for them...even if it doesn't work out right away, lol. It really did kick off the whole story, and look where its gone-my longest one yet! Thanks again for reading and for the lovely review! ~Gina :)

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 07/01/11 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter Two

Yeah, looosen up, Evans, you horrible girl. UGHH! Don;t like her much at the moment, although having snogged (and possibly shagged) and relative of Vernon's I can see she's suffering from PTSD. That was a good detail, btw. She's not quite so perfect and in control, is she? Serioulsy, I can see they're all suffering from the incident the year before and poor dead Kieran. But really, give James a break. HIS MUM HAS DIED!

Ha - see you've got me all riled and involved in the story. Well done, Ginaaaaaaaaaa! ~Carole~

Author's Response: That's sort of what Lea said, about not liking Lily. :) But you've caught on exactly to what I was getting at with that guy at the wedding, so thanks for that. Thanks for the review, I'm glad you enjoyed this chapter! ~Gina :)

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 07/01/11 Title: Chapter 3: Chapter Three

Hi there. First off ... Stick that in your cauldron and boil it. that line had me roaring my head off very loudly. Very inventive turn of phrase, Gina. (Edit:OOOH, it was from Lea)

All in all, I am really enjoying the twists and turns of this story, although I did get confused at the change in POV and thought you'd made an error and had copied and pasted parts of the previous conversation. I realised what you were doing, of course, and also remembered a past convo we'd had, but ... I'm not sure it quite works. I think what I'd do is not repeat the conversation at the beginning of her POV, but maybe start from her locking herself in the bathroom, a line of his conversation coming back to her (the line about Anastasia having taste, perhaps) and then launch into Lily remembering the horror of the wedding. That was scary, btw, and I really empathised with Lily at that point. It was a minor flaw, however, and probably no one else would be confused like me, but I thought I'd mention it.

Oh and hell, I hate myself for this, but James calling her a twat is pretty offensive for a boy to call a girl. It does mean female parts (ahem) but is generally aimed at men and is considered funny, but at a girl it's not as funny.I know she can't hear it and he's exasperated with her, but I think Remus would give him a look, or something. Or change to 'cow' or 'bitch', but then I don't find those words that offensive and others (including my kids - ha ha) do.

Um ... sorry, that all sounds rather negative and I don't mean to be because I'm genuinely enjoying this story and can't wait for the rest. The Slytherins are great. Not cardboard cutout villains, but fully rounded and still evil - hee hee.

Get this finished! ~Carole~

Author's Response: Hi Carole! Thanks for the in depth review. I appreciate your opinion - even if I disagree. :) Although, I don't disagree completely, to be honest. I'm not sure how I feel about the repetition of certain things either, but I did think showing things from both POV would flesh out a mutual encounter a bit. Plus, I really needed to show different things happening to them, but at the same time - particularly, James running into Avery outside while Lily was with Mark inside. As for James and that word - yes, you've mentioned that you don't like it. Yet James is really ticked at her, and he's not saying it to her face. And you know how much I struggle with my British insults! ;) Really, if that's the only thing you've picked on here, I'm thrilled. I thought for sure there would be more, lol. And it wasn't what I had there originally, only my first choice was misspelled and not quite vehement enough anyway. I'm glad you liked Lea's phrase, since we couldn't use the one we wanted, lol! And I'm glad you are still reading and enjoying the story. Thanks so much for the review!! ~Gina :)

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 07/22/11 Title: Chapter 7: Chapter Seven

awww, this is a lovely chapter, but also pretty sad.

"You started it!" she called back, knowing it was immature. He turned back to her, his head cocked sideways as he looked up at her. "And you've ended it. 'Night, Lily." He walked away, leaving her confused once more. She thought his shoulders seemed a bit more slumped, but perhaps she was only imagining it. She decided to give it one last try. That conversation there is really poignant and I'm really sad for James. Hmm, speaking of James - you've hurt him again! really, Gina, I thought you had a crush on the guy and yet he's suffering again *sigh*. Natalie will not be happy.

The conversation with Snape was great. I find it unlikely they never spoke again as they'd bump into each other and it must be hard giving up that habit after everything they shared, even after the Mudblood incident.

Lily really is getting het up by Anastasia - ha ha ha - get over it love!

Right, get on with the next chapter. I need my Marauder J/L fix.

~Carole~

Author's Response: Hm, yes, there are some sad things, left unsaid, I suppose. I'm glad you picked that out of their conversations. And I'm glad you didn't find Snape too random. I agree, they must have had some contact, and I'm sure it was hard for them. Thank you so much for the lovely review. I've just sent Lea the next chapter but I'm worried it won't live up to expectations after the amazing reviews from you and Lori! I hope you continue to enjoy where this tale goes - thanks again! ~Gina :)

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 06/21/11 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter One

Gina!!! Lovely approach to this. I am really intrigued by the backstory, so I demand you tell us what happened in Hogsmeade.

Remus is sweet in this. (I suspect a certain person's influence *scowls*) and James is sadly baleful. But I think you've excelled yourself with Lily. She is snarky and also witty, but bad tempered enough to make me want to shake some sense into her. James is LOVELY. Give him a chance!

Look forward to reading more. (Oh, and I'm not getting my favourite authors updates atm. I didn't get Jess' story either.)

Thanks for another classic. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks for coming by to read this, Carole. I'm glad you liked the beginning. I have to admit, I wasn't sure whether to plunge into this idea or write that bit in Hogsmeade, so hopefully I'll be able to write that someday as it is a backstory I'd like to tell. Lea said something similar about Lily but the next chapter does get into her mean spirited attitude a bit. I don't know about another classic, but I had to give it another go because they are my OTP. Thanks again for the lovely review! ~Gina :)

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 08/09/11 Title: Chapter 10: Chapter Ten

No no no. I will be away so can't read next week (although the kindle could well work, so you never know.) Great story. Sirius is coming over all deep - ha ha. And poor Mark - can he get together with Cynthia? ~Carole~

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 07/14/11 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter Four

I love this chapter. The banter is brilliant, especially at the end when they're planning the party.

I could go through this and point out my favourite bits but actually that's too difficult. Okay, I'll have a go. For me, my favourite part is the way you've caught James. I love the fact that he hates the others being his 'bodyguards' and also that you've shown so brilliantly the bonds between the four of them. Peter is excellent. Not muttering darkly in corners but a full Marauder who has worries like the rest of them. I love Sirius, too. (Who is his mystery girl - or is it a boy? 0-0)

Gina, this is one of the best chaptered Marauder/ JamesLily stories I've read because it has a plot, back story and very genuine interractions between the characters. Brilliant. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Wow, thanks Carole. I really appreciate the review. I don't know if it's quite that brilliant, but I'm glad I've got some things down right, lol. I do like writing James. The mystery girl is not a boy, no, lol - but she has appeared before, thanks to you. *whistles innocently* I don't know if she'll appear again, but I've set it up in case I need it. I could say so much more but that would give away the magic so I won't. Thanks for reading, and a tremendous thanks for the nomination! I hope you enjoy the next parts, I will tell you there are some interesting things planned and it will be my longest yet...Thanks!! ~Gina :)

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 07/20/11 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter Six

Awww, noooo, Madam Pomfrey spoils the moment. Gina, that was an amazing chapter. The flashback to Hogsmeade lived far beyond the high expectations that I had for it. I'm so entranced with this story. It is superb. I think I particulalrly like Remus in this. Too often it's Sirius and James together, but here Remus has a much more prominent role.

I like your OC's - Anastasia is making me laugh because I think I've known a few girls like her. Mark is lovely, but I feel a bit sorry for him. he's been dealt a marked hand given what we know of James and Lily.

Keep writing!!!!! hee hee ~Carole~

Author's Response: Oooh, yes - I feel bad for Mark too. Not Anastasia. Glad you like Remus, not sure how he took the lead other than he probably spent a bit more time with James seventh year since he was a prefect and James was Head Boy. And Sirius is off with someone else who may or may not appear (and no, it's not you, lol) I'm so very glad the Hogsmeade bit lived up to your expectations. I'm still not entirely sure if this was the place for it, but this is where it put itself. It will be fun to write someday. :) Thanks so much for continuing to read this - and of course I'm going to keep writing! I couldn't stop even if I wanted to! ~Gina :)

 
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