Penname: Equinox Chick [Contact]
Real name: Carole
Member Since: 05/10/08
Website:
Beta-reader: No
Status: Member
Bio:
What can I say. I'm a grown woman living in London but I'm obsessed with a teenage wizard and his friends. Am I mad? Probably Do I care? Hell no!
EDIT: Grown? Um, probably not

For my first foray into the realms of fanfiction I've chosen to write about the Marauders. I'll always stick fairly closely to canon as I think JK knows best. Although I've enjoyed reading about other ships I, personally, don't think I could write with conviction about Ginny/Crabbe or Hermione/Mclaggan relationships.

EDIT: ha ha ha ha ha - How I have changed! I'm now firmly in the rare-pair, SSP, and things that aren't quite conventional camp, although I still loves me some James/Lily.

My second chaptered fic (Apparently Asleep) has started a love affair with Tonks/Remus and confirmed my obsession for all things Sirius. *sigh*

I am indebted to Terri (mudbloodproud) for being a great beta and all round amazing person. If it hadn't been for her encouragement I would have thrown in the towel many months ago.

EDIT: I have made a lot of wonderful friends during my past three years on MNFF, including (in no particular order) Natalie, Kara, Hannah/Bob, Jess, Gina, Lea, Lori, Julia, Minna, Emmahhhh, and the fantabulous BB.

I hope Mugglenet and you enjoy reading my words as much as I've enjoyed writing them. Huge thank-you to my niece, Amanda, for being one of the first to catch the Harry Potter bug and nagging me into reading them.


I’ve written a variety of stories, so here is them arranged in categories. Some are cross- referenced. So a James/Lily may appear in Marauder or Canon Romance

Marauder
A Second Chance
Contemplating Lilies
Dancing Queen
First Date Disaster
Flying, Fair Play and the Need for a Firm Hand
It Takes a Wolf to Prank a Dog
Juggling
Learning to Fly
March Madness
O.W.L.s, Quidditch and the Added Distraction of Sirius Black
Peace in Heaven
Ribbons, not Strings
Sixth Time's the Charm
Thank you for your time, Professor
The Lions of Gryffindor
The Lions of Gryffindor
The Sum of the Whole
Veils
Who's That Girl?
Wormtail on the Hogwarts Express



Canon Romance
'i'before 'e' (Percy/Audrey)
A Prize Above Rubies (Isla Black/Bob Hitchens)
Acorns (Bill/Fleur)
Apparently Asleep (Remus/Tonks)
Birthday Girl (George/Angelina)
Bound in the Beating of Each Other’s Hearts (Narcissa/Lucius)
Coup de Foudre (Bill/Fleur)
Dancing Queen (James/Lily)
First Date Disaster (James/Lily)
Five weeks (Remus/Tonks)
Forces of Nature (Ron/Hermione)
Forever Dancing (Alice/Frank)
In The Stars (Draco/Astoria)
Key of the Door (Ron/Hermione)
Kissing the Joy as it Flies (Seamus/Lavender)
March Madness (James/Lily)
Not Quite Perfect (Bill/Fleur)
Reconnaissance (Remus/Tonks)
Sixth Time’s the Charm (James/Lily)
Snowball Fights (Teddy/Victoire)
Until Death (Eaters) Do Us Part (Draco/Astoria)
Veils (James/Lily)
You Dance Divinely (George/Angelina)



Non (or rather tweaked) Canon (apart from one story, these don’t break any canon.)

Better than Chocolate (Charlie/Tonks)
Heat of Life (Harry/Katie)
Her Tomorrows (Harry/Parvati)
High (Scorpius/Lily)
Lavender, blue- A Gryffindor True (Lavender/Blaise)
Love At First Strike (Angelina/Terry)
Mirrors (Charlie/Penelope)
Misperception (Oliver/Cedric/Daphne)
Orphans of the Storm (Seamus/Parvati/Dean)
Passion Among the Primroses (Arthur/Mafalda)
Predictions of Love (Gilderoy/Sybil)
Ribbons, not Strings (Remus/Rosmerta)
Shrouds (Hermione/Draco)
Snapdragons (Charlie/OC)
Stars or Carousels (James/Dominique)
Summer’s Heat (Sirius/OC)
Swans (Mollyjnr/OC)
Teenage Witch (Charity/Myron Wagtail )
The Happy Couple (Harry/Ginny, Blaise/Lavender)
The Only One (Lavender/Blaise Teddy/Victoire)
The Untrodden Path (Draco/Hannah)
Where We Started From (Dean/Ginny)



Same sex Pairings
Apple-bobbing ( Lisa/Susan)
Close Your Eyes (Hermione/Lavender)
Drowning, not Waving (Oliver/Cedric)
Eyes That Know Me (Scorpius/Hugo)
Forbidden Colours (Tracey/Demelza)
Fracture (Theo/Justin)
Monochrome (Sirius/Remus)
The Dance We Do (Bellatrix/Amelia)
The Hat that Thinks it’s a Chair (Justin/Theo)
Truth Or Dare (Cormac/Zacharias)



Humour
Aberforth Dumbledore: A Love that Dare not Bleat its Name
Lockhart, Sprout and Two Smoking Goblets
Passion Among the Primroses
Predictions of Love
The Bacchus Book
Vampire - Ghost Child!

Historical
A Prize Above Rubies
Aberforth Dumbledore: A Love that Dare not Bleat its Name
An Outstretched Hand
Shadows Deep

Others (General, D/A, Post Hogwarts, Next Gen)
A Tangled Web (D/A)
All in the Genes (NG)
Chasing the Scoop! (Post Hogwarts)
Christmas on the Outside (General/Trio era)
Dean Thomas and the Reiver Curse (Post Hogwarts)
Diavol (Remus Trio Era)
Every Breath You Take (Post Hogwarts/Next Gen)
Forever Dancing (Alice/Frank)
Friends in Unlikely Places (Post Hog. Hermione)
Growing Old Disgracefully (Post Hog)
High (NG)
Lavender, blue (Trio Era)
Mere Wisps of Light (Post Hog. Draco fic)
Muggles, Magic and Misconceptions (Next Gen)
My Funny Valentine (Post Hogwarts)
Staring into the Fire (Trio Era)
The Waiting Game (D/A)
Whispers from the Past (Next Gen)



Mysteries
The Foolhardy Boys and Parvati, too
Who’s that Girl?
Xanthe Interrupted
Zeitgeist



Poetry
Askew
As They Watch
Beyond Beseeching
Celestina's Songbook: Christmas Edition, Volume 1
Cold Dreams
Draco's Journey
Enslaved
Fairytale of Hogwarts
Flying High
Forever France
Frozen Silence
Hexed!
Hey, brother
I Believed in Lily Evans
Master Barty Regrets
Phoenix Flames
Queen of My Heart
Sirius, Baby
The Daydream Pedlar's Song
The Four
The Labyrinth Mind
Unreconciled

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Reviews by Equinox Chick
 

Before I Forget by hestiajones
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 9]

Summary: Sometimes, the visions are mere flickers “ hazy and muddled. Sometimes, their clarity shakes me out of the limbo. But I’m always sure it is him I see.

I’d have loved to tell you the whole story, but you see, I cannot remember much of it.



Thanks to Kara (Karaley Dargen) for her wonderful beta-ness. :) And Carole (Equinox Chick) for 'Warwick'. ;)

DISCLAIMER: Everyone/everything you recognise immediately belongs to J.K.Rowling. However, the first names of the Death Eaters (except the main characters) aren't canon. The pairing, of course, is mine.

Categories: Same-Sex Pairings Genre: Warnings: Abuse, Character Death, Mental Disorders, Sexual Situations, Strong Profanity, Substance Abuse, Violence

Word count: 6754 Chapters: 2 Completed: No
Published:
08/05/10 Updated: 04/27/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 08/08/10 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Love

UGHHH! MNFF botched my review and cur me off. Take two

I drove into that kiss a year’s worth of longing and ache. I took that kiss as payment for every second of anxiety and frustration he had caused me. But my own exacting hunger soon gave way to tenderness. I thought of his laughter, the way he cocked his head when confronted by something incomprehensible, the way he looked with his hair falling about his face, his rare smiles…and I knew…I knew I was neck deep in love with no way out. ... and that is why I love your writing, Natalie. The phrasing is sublime.

This story is great. Rabastan is such an unused character so you have free rein with him, yet you've made him recognisably your own and so very Slytherin. Regulus, too, is good. I think too many people try to write him as a hero from the start, but he must have been drawn to the Dark side from the start because he would never have joined the DE's. You show him as quite a ruthless character willing to use Rabastan's feelings for him to get what he wanted. Did he feel the same way? I don't think so. He seemed to be using Rabastan to get what he wanted. Brilliantly Slytherin.

Umm, nit pickiness knock if off, I think you mean 'it'. Oh and *cough locker room cough*

But that was all. This is such a good story, Natalie. (thank you, Emma, for getting her out of her block!) ~Carole~

Author's Response: GASP! The locker room! I need to change it before Neil sees it. LOL!



I am having such fun writing Rabastan. Don't much like the guy, but he's vastly entertaining in a morbid sort of way.



I agree that Regulus was interested in Voldemort's regime in the start. I've been rereading DH, and I am pretty sure he was fascinated by the Death Eaters. I don't know if he was evil - I don't think he was. However, I'm fairly sure that while he had the same cruelty which Sirius possessed, he was more cunning and subtle. I tried to show those traits in the way he uses Rabastan.



As for his relationship with Rabastan,you're correct. He does not feel the same way, though he is fond of him in a detached sort of way. And...I can't say more now. EEP!



I'll go and edit those things. Thank you for such a lovely review, Carole!



~Natalie.

 

Promises by Nitwit Blubber Oddment Tweak x
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 16]

Summary: Past Featured StoryPromises.

In the Battle of Hogwarts, Tonks has nothing left but promises to keep.

I'll be back. I promise.

Categories: Dark/Angsty Fics Genre: Warnings: Character Death

Word count: 2431 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/07/10 Updated: 08/08/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 08/09/10 Title: Chapter 1: Promises

Aww, Emma, that's very very sad. You've killed my OTP again *sob sob*. Very well-written. You seem to have got a handle on Tonks as she's torn between love for her husband and love for Teddy. I think there's a third thing that would pull at her, which is that she's an Auror and thus she has the dubious honour of being bound to fight. Does that make sense? I would have liked to have seen that explored a bit more, although you did touch on it briefly when she wanted to go instead of Remus. Brilliant moment there by the way. Oh, and their kiss. Quite perfect.Understated yet so very deep and true.

You hoped with all your might that your child would not be punished for his parents' foolish mistake. I was a bit confused with this bit. Were you saying that teddy's conception was a mistake (quite likely) or that Remus' parents made a foolish mistake that led him to becoming a werewolf. I'm presuming it's the former which makes sense, but just wondered if I'd made an error.

The end was gut-wrenching. Neither could keep their promises, poor Teddy indeed.

~Carole~

Author's Response: Caroleeeee. Thank you so much for leaving such a fab review - all of your lovely comments are greatly appreciated :)

I do see what you mean about Tonks' duty as an Auror, and you're right, it's something that I should have more than likely touched on a bit more, but she seemed to utterly preoccupied during that scene in the books that I didn't feel as if it was high on her list of priorities, if you get me.

Oh, and for your question. Yes, I did mean that Teddy's conception was a mistake - not in the usual way that people take it, but in the risks associated with Remus' lycanthropy, and whether or not that would be passed down to Teddy. Glad to clear that up for you :)

--Emma

 

The Seven Potters by Gmariam
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 21]

Summary: Past Featured StoryHarry is about to leave the Burrow for the final time when his six doppelgangers give him something to think about. Set during book seven and based on the chapter of the same name, but having little to do with it, really.
Winner, Quicksilver Quill award for Best Humour story.

Categories: General Fics Genre: Warnings: Mild Profanity, Substance Abuse

Word count: 1888 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/09/10 Updated: 08/09/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 08/10/10 Title: Chapter 1: The Seven Potters

I nearly had to sue you for the price of a new laptop. I laughed so much at Dirthy!Harry and Super!Harry that I spat my tea out. This is funny, Gina, I do love the way you've got Harry's personalities down pat. They still sound recogniseably Harry (although I think DirtyHarry would be wanting to spend time with Fleur rather than Hermione - ha ha).

Slight crit ... I wasn't sure about the 'Stay in canon, stay in canon.' muttering of DrunkHarry. It was very funny, don't get me wrong, but at that point we were suddenly watching the author write a parody. Sorry, that sounds confusing, but it was a step out of fanfiction at that point. And I feel very miserly for saying that.

I really loved the end. You suddenly got a bit more serious, and that struck me as very Potterlike because in the midst of this dreadful war, they still manage to have a joke at times.

I did enjoy this ... and wow it seems other people did too. OH, and darnit! You're on fifty-three now as well *goes back to Dramione* Well Done! ~Carole~

Author's Response: Hi Carole! Thanks for coming to read this! I'm glad it made you laugh. Don't feel bad about your crit, because I TOTALLY AGREE. It knocks down that proverbial fourth wall between the audience and the actors, so to speak. I am totally aware of that...and yet, I can still hear "Stay in canon, stay in canon" to the strains of "Brother John" so I just couldn't take it out, lol. And it is a bit of a parody, after all - less of a play on Harry's personalities and more of a play on how he turns out in fanfic. I submitted it at another site under the parody category, even. So, I'll leave it for now, but believe me, I am aware of the break. And yes, I'm keeping up with you. ;) Thanks for the lovely review! ~Gina :)

 

Bit of a Nasty Shock by hestiajones
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 17]

Summary: ‘I’m half and half,’ said Seamus. ‘Me dad’s a Muggle. Mam didn’t tell him she was a witch ’til after they were married. Bit of a nasty shock for him.’



You'd love to hear this story, wouldn't you?



Thanks to Emma (Amortentia_x) for the Irishpick! :D And I am not J.K.Rowling, though they all belong to her.



Nominated for a QSQ in the Best Humour category.

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1050 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/10/10 Updated: 08/12/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 08/13/10 Title: Chapter 1: Some witches do know how to bewitch!

ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, This is lovely. Just very funny and I could recognise Teh Irish Banshee's influence here. Oh, poor Liam. Natalie, this was a lovely little snapshot into the beginning of their life together. My only criticism is that it should have been longer. Can you write some more about them. I'd love to know if they stayed together ... ~Carole~

Author's Response: Hehehehe! Teh Irish Banshee can not only wield her Bariche and Oldric Shield well, but come up with cool Irish names, too. ;) Yeah, it should have been longer. D: I think I'll try and add a bit more. Thanks for the review!



~Natalie.

 

Going Against Salazar's Grain by hestiajones
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 12]

Summary: "Sometimes," said Dumbledore, "we sort too soon."





Originally writtten for TTB's ReSorting Challenge. Many, many thanks to Riham (padfoot_returns) for her wonderful work on this story. :D



This story won a 2011 QSQ for Best Alternate Universe in the one-shot category.



DISCLAIMER: I am not J.K.Rowling, though everything you recognise belongs to her. AU because Dumbledore was a Gryffindor. ;)

Categories: Alternate Universe Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1189 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/11/10 Updated: 08/14/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 08/10/11 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Oh, very very clever. Of course he is so manipulative and cunning and clever, so Slytherin is a great choice to put him in. And the way this so carefully foreshadows Snape's story is all good, too.

Well done! (6 - possibly or 7)

Author's Response: I do see him in Slytherin a lot. But he was way too bold and courageous and flamboyant, I suppose. Love him in spite of everything. Thanks for the reviewwwww! <3333

 

Taking Direction by WeasleyMom
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 115]

Summary: What if the characters in the Harry Potter films were portrayed”not by actors”but by the book versions of themselves, as created by Rowling? How might things unfold on that set? What would the characters think of the changes made from the stories they’d already lived out… to the ones written for the script?

This fic is a series of one-shots, posted as chapters, each from the perspective of a different character who is dealing with the changes occurring between the book and the script.

 

Holy Movie Canon, Batman! This fic won the 2011 Quicksilver Quill Award for Best Chaptered Humor Story. Thanks so, so much!

 



Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: Alternate Universe

Word count: 5896 Chapters: 4 Completed: No
Published:
08/23/10 Updated: 02/06/13


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 10/06/10 Title: Chapter 2: Babe Magnet

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

I'm so glad you managed to get this on the site. it's wickedly funny and just what's needed to brighten up my day after the hideousness that is Kloves/Yates is unleashed on the world.

And now I know why you wanted Babe Magnet and 'on the pull'. Poor old Harry!

Great fun ~Carole~

Author's Response: Yes, and thanks for supplying the correct terminology for me. :) I hadn't considered the timing of this thing, but I'm glad it went through on the day we learned about the movie Harmony. Gives me an outlet for my rage. Hehe. Thanks for the review, Carole! I'm glad you think it's funny!

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 02/07/13 Title: Chapter 4: Fired Up

hahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahhahahahahhahaha - SHOELACE!!!! Oh, Lori, this is so fabulous! You know, the Weasleys standing there in shock and not doing a thing whilst the Burrow burns has never seemed so wrong until you pointed it out. But, yes, I love Molly's outrage, second only to Arthur's enthusiasm for his workshop. That is so very Arthur.

It's easy to miss the glorious characterisation here hidden in the laughs, but you have it all. Albus is a love, Remus absolutely perfect, Minerva suitably calming. You've summed them up all so brilliantly. And got all the bits I ached over in the film into this chapter.

Can't wait for Ginny crying over Dean, the hideous RoR kiss, and Ron's lines being given to Hermione (that still rankles) .

Love this so much. And am giggling far too much.

OH!!!! You MUST do Draco's suit. you MUST! ~Carole

Author's Response: Yay, Carole, I'm so glad you liked it! This chapter gave me fits, but finally, it is done. I'm glad you reminded me about Ginny crying over Dean--I hadn't thought of that, and the next chapters is the last with content for HBP. Ron's lines and his utter Gargoyle-ness will be addressed, though the main issue with be the H/G kissy-poo.

(Oh, and I think you've already discovered that Draco's suit is covered in the previous chapters. But yes, that is one of the most obvious headdesk moments in that particular film. I will never understand it.)

Thanks so much for reading and for the fabulous review! <3

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 01/19/11 Title: Chapter 3: Saving It for Seven

ha ha ha ha ha - Oh My. Good on so many levels.

Shoelace - ha ha ha ha ha - yes, that was my utter, utter bete noir of that particular film (except for the end and ... grrrr.... you know the bit I mean Mute!Ron)

Draco in the suit just makes it so funny. At least they're able to laugh about something. You couldn;t possibly write a little consolation kiss for Draco with Hermione, could you? ..... No, I thought not. *ducks to avoid Lori's own Bat-Bogey Hex* .

Very funny. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Ooh, I *should* have my own Bat-Bogey Hex! LOL. No kisses for Draco of any kind on my watch, friend. Hehe. I'm so glad you read this and thought it was funny. I did think of you with the Shoelace reference, and I intend to use your Gargoyle Ron at some point... something for him to pout about, at least. I'm so glad I asked the f-list... Draco's suit is a great point that I never would have thought of on my own. Thanks for the review, Carole! I appreciate it!

 

Swimming Lessons by WeasleyMom
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 46]

Summary: Past Featured StorySix weeks after the battle, Hermione puts on a bathing suit for the first time in nearly a year... scars are revealed as painful memories rise to the surface yet again.

I almost submitted this under dark/angst, but at the end of the day, I see it as Ron/Hermione. *shrug* Also, a gazillion thanks to my awesometastic beta Natalie, and to both Neil and Carole for helping me with all things British. :D

I'm thrilled to announce that this story was nominated for a 2011 Quicksilver Quill in the category Best Canon Romance. YAY!

Categories: Ron/Hermione Genre: Warnings: Sexual Situations, Violence

Word count: 1715 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/26/10 Updated: 08/29/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 08/29/10 Title: Chapter 1: one-shot

I think of Tonks and Fleur, how fiercely they loved and how little they thought of things as trivial as scars on the one they loved. Ron is like them, and suddenly, so am I. OH Merlin, Lori, that line is so bloody good. This whole story is wonderful. So very touching and true! I usually dislike first person, but it is absolutely the right choice here for Hermione and you really crept into her psyche.

Must stop fangirling or I'll never finish my *coughDramionecough* Brilliant, though. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Um, did you just say fangirling? Excuse me a moment... *faints dead on the floor and recovers as quickly as possible* Hehe. Yay, I'm so glad you like it! That was my favorite line in the original drabble, as I meant it to mark a point of healing for her. Not complete healing, of course, but I think every little bit matters. Thanks so much for the happy review!

 

Tales of the Battle by Northumbrian
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 274]

Summary:
Over fifty people died at the Battle of Hogwarts. There are dozens of stories of loss, betrayal, heroism and sacrifice. These are some of those stories.

Nominated for: Best General (Chaptered) story – Quicksilver Quills 2011


Categories: General Fics Genre: Warnings: Mild Profanity, Violence

Word count: 49415 Chapters: 25 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/28/10 Updated: 03/31/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 08/29/10 Title: Chapter 1: The Calm Before

What a fantastic idea. Neil, I love this, especially at the end when you bring in the dreaded Irma Pince. This is so clever, and I look forward to reading many, many stories of those who didn't fight. PLEASE tell me you're going to do Trelawney.

You've caught the voice of the characters well. Irma's 'Best get something to drink now.' isn't grammatically correct, but it's the way people speak. PERFECT. Oh ... constructive criticism... ummm, make it longer? Apart from that, healers should be capitalised, I think. Great job. ~Carole~.

Author's Response:
Trelawney, I have 21 more names on my list but Trelawney isn't one of them. I''ll think about it. What about Augusta Longbottom? Many of the characters are combatants and three (at least) are Original Characters (one being Mark Moon, so I'd probably best let the Opaleye know (-; ).

So far nothing is longer than 3000 words.
Neil

 

On the Wings of Scarlet and Gold by lucca4
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 15]

Summary:

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing."

A war is brewing in the Wizarding world. Hogwarts is not the safe haven it used to be. Students are beginning to consider the unthinkable, desperate to save those they love. The corridors are filled with eager spies who are too young to realise the severity of their decisions.

In the midst of it all, the Marauders are closing in on their last year of schooling. James is learning that letting go is sometimes the only way to move forward. Lily discovers that what she was looking for all along is right in front of her, while Sirius and Remus struggle to keep the group together, each in their own way. And Peter begins to realise that he can be more than a tiny piece of a large puzzle, perhaps the most dangerous epiphany of all.

Sides must be taken, a war must be fought, and prices must be paid—some higher than others. Choices are made that will undoubtedly change the course of the future. And from this darkness, the phoenix must rise.



Categories: Marauder Era Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Sexual Situations, Strong Profanity, Substance Abuse, Violence

Word count: 7329 Chapters: 3 Completed: No
Published:
09/09/10 Updated: 10/28/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/26/10 Title: Chapter 1: The Final Return

Hi there. I do like some Marauder action, so clicked on this expecting something light ad then you write something totally different. The warning at the end from Dumbledore was a timely reminder that the Marauder era was a dangerous one - so well done.

Not sure what to make of Sirius. He seemed vicious towards Lily, and I can't quite believe he'd bad mouth her to that extent, so i suspect there's something else going on here. Did James really take the rejection that hard? Or is something else happening in Sirius' world? Peter having a girlfriend is good. It seems to be breaking them up a bit, and that line about the trolley lady not recognising speaks volumes about his role in that gang. Great characterisation.

Not keen on Sirius calling the girls 'maraudettes'. I do hope they don't call themselves that and it's just his strange idea of a joke.

Matthew Parker seems a decent enough bloke (and a Hufflepuff YAY!)

Nice first chapter, anyway.

~Carole~

Author's Response: Thank you so, so much for reviewing! It made my morning :]. I'm glad you liked Dumbledore's warning. Sirius can be a little hotheaded at times, and he has a few issues with Lily. I might have overdone that scene, now that I reread it. And don't worry--the "marauderettes" is *not* what Lily and her friends call themselves! I'm happy you thought Peter was satisfactory, I've had the hardest time writing him. And I'm so glad you liked Matthew--there's more insight to his character in the next chapter. Thanks again for reviewing! xx Ariana xx

 

The Shopgirl by Apollonious
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 5]

Summary: Since she left Hogwarts a year ago, Verity Maddox has had four jobs. Now, nearly destitute, a month behind on rent, and able to afford only minimal food, she is desperate for a job.

Everything changes when she takes a job working for the Weasley twins. Not only can she live without fear of starving or being evicted; Verity herself is changing.

Categories: General Fics Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Mild Profanity, Sexual Situations

Word count: 4913 Chapters: 2 Completed: No
Published:
09/11/10 Updated: 03/24/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/15/10 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Weasley's Wizard Wheezes

Hellooo. This is interesting. Verity is an underused character - probably because we don't see much of her - but you seem to be developing a good back story for her. I like the differences between Fred and George. Fred obviously fancies her (tut tut he took Angelina to the ball, he shouldn't have been noticing other girls!) but George is obviously suspicious about something. What is it he doesn't like? One of the answers to the questions.

My only crit, really, is that I get twitchy when Muggle books are mentioned in the Potterverse. Hermione never read any, and although I think she would have done, using a real book just strikes me as not quite right. It's bringing RL into the Potterverse, if you see what I mean. But that's very, very minor and I know lots of people disagree with me.

The other nit-pick is that in the book, Verity's uniform was magenta coloured robes, the same as the twins.

Great idea, Olivia, and I can't wait to read the rest. Ughhh, and Larry is HORRIBLE! ~Carole~

Author's Response: Wow! Thanks for the review, Carole! I worked rather hard on Verity's back story, so I'm glad you like what I've done so far. Yeah, I agree, Fred really shouldn't have been looking at other girls, but he was a sixteen-year-old boy at that point. No offense meant to sixteen-year-old boys, I'm not that far off sixteen myself. The Muggle book reference is mainly to show the awkward juxtaposition Verity is in. She's a witch (obviously) but she isn't very good at magic and she's Muggle-born. I thought something like P&P would be relatively safe. I know about the magenta robes. Trust me, they're coming. Thanks for the review! Olivia

 

Magnetism by Nitwit Blubber Oddment Tweak x
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 6]

Summary: Magnetism.

This isn't love. This is an absorbing, compelling, compulsive addiction. Your thirst for him is unquenchable and all-consuming, yet his presence only makes you yearn for him more. There is no antidote, no remedy to these feelings. He is your drug. You are the addict. And the high he gives you is incomparable to any narcotic-induced hit.

Categories: Same-Sex Pairings Genre: Warnings: Sexual Situations

Word count: 1665 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
09/11/10 Updated: 09/18/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/18/10 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Nooo, evil manipulative Teddy. Can't have that. He's my utter love bucket. the pride and joy of my two favourite characters. Emma, what are you trying to do to me?

I have to say, I loved this writing, but I was a little bit distracted by desperately needing to know who the two lovers were. At one point I thought it was Draco and Ron (oh wow I want to see that!) then it was James and anyone I could think of with blue eyes, and I was a bit iffy cause James is a bit young. Ignore me I'm rambling ... Teddy and Fred. Mmm, interesting because you have the cousin connection there too. Good characterisation of Fed and through his eyes Teddy as well. So well done for that.You manage to convey some quite beautiful moments here. Fred's angst and his loathing for the situation are really apparant. And the allusion to it being like a drug is an apt one.

Second person. I'm not a huge fan, you know that, but it's well sustained and not too dominating in this fic, but on the whole I'd rather see this as a third person piece. Ignore me, I'm kinda cranky tonight.

Did enjoy this partly because I always love reading your work. So evocative, Emma. ~Carole~

 

Summary:

Growing up fully immersed in the early sixteenth century English aristocracy, all Anne Boleyn ever wanted was the chance to make her own choices. When she is suddenly thrust into the magical world of wizards and witches, her life is forever altered.

The seventh son of a seventh son sifts through papers on his desk in the Headmaster’s Office. His cousin, the six son of a six son, toils in the shadows bring his brethren down. They both know that the support of Anne Boleyn will be essential.

This is the tale of Anne Boleyn, her efforts to preserve justice in the face of adversity, and her influence on society that continues to this day.

At the beginning of this tale, one may wish to note that Anne has five fingers on her right hand.

Everything is not what it seems.

This story is down for revisions. You can still read the prologue, though.

Categories: Historical Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Mild Profanity

Word count: 1165 Chapters: 1 Completed: No
Published:
09/12/10 Updated: 02/09/11


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/15/10 Title: Chapter 1: Prologue

OOOh, I like this! What an original idea, and I can't wait to see what happens. I take it this Zabinii is an old Gryffindor, so is his spiteful cousin a Slyth, I wonder? Really intrigued to read the rest of this. Well done! ~Carole~

Author's Response: I'm glad you're interested! Indeed, the spiteful cousin is a Slyth. There's quite a lot of non-canon Zabini family backstory in this, and it will be revealed as time goes on :) Thank you so much for reviewing! Peace, Virgil

 

Summary:

All Teddy Lupin had ever wanted was to be the kind of man his godfather was. He even followed in Harry's footsteps and became an Auror.

Harry wanted nothing more than to be the father that Teddy would never have, but work and obligations always seemed to get in the way. Before he knew it, Teddy was all grown up. How had he missed all those precious moments? He knew he had to make up for it somehow.

After all, they had all the time in the world, right?

 

This fic WON a 2011 Quicksilver Quill Award: Best Post-Hogwarts Story



Categories: Post-Hogwarts Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Mild Profanity, Violence

Word count: 6160 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
09/15/10 Updated: 09/19/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/20/10 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Noooooo. What's happening here? Emma outs him, you kill him. Poor Teddy! Jess, this is very interesting and such a great story. I do like Harry not being quite such a perfect family man. His guilt over neglecting Teddy is obvious, but he still never does a bloody thing about it - tsk tsk - slaps his wrist at that.

I liked all the action scenes and your DE's were suitably ebil. This is silly but my favourite bit was when he thought of Rowle as a 'lummox'. My dad used to use that word so I was giggling at that.

Mmm, nit pick - but not of the Brit kind - this is a canon pick. In the Epilogue (everyone groans) Harry mentions that Teddy comes round for dinner about four times a week, so I'm not sure they would have been so estranged. Although you could say the relationship had vastly improved in the past few years so that could account for the frequency of his visits. Perhaps you did and I'm not reading properly (excuse me, it must be catching *snort*)

I always enjoy reading your portrayal of canon characters, especially the ones we know so little about, because you always present them ion a fresh way.

~Carole~

Author's Response:

Hmm, so you're not throwing things at me for killing of baby Teddy. I feel a bit safer now, lol.

I wanted this to be sort of a moral story that teaches us to live in the now, because who the hell knows what tomorrow will bring. I was sort of inspired by the song Cats in the Cradle by I believe Harry Chapin. Harry keeps getting disctracted until he realises that he's missed so many of Teddy's most important years. He does improve, however. When Harry summons Teddy to his office and asks him to come over for dinner that night and as much as he likes, that was the start of the repairing of the relationship. That's when Teddy was 'over four nights a week' and found time to meet/fall for Victoire. 

Oh, and do be careful about reading properly. Some of that, er, literary, 'it makes me think' might get on you. I hear it burns like a mofo.

Lovely review, and I thank you for your glowing words. *hugs*

~Jess (who is going back to writing her Katie/Oliver smut)

 

Summary:

To most lycanthropes, it is a curse. To one, he relishes it and the power it gives him. Who is this one?

See Fenrir Greyback and his transformation from man to beast.

 

This tritina was written for the Department of Mysteries Challenge in the Poetry Anyone forum of the Beta Boards. By some miracle, it won first place. (love you, Jules)

This poem was also nominated for a 2011 Quicksilver Quill Award: Best Poem



Categories: Poetry Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 141 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
09/15/10 Updated: 09/16/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/17/10 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

You already have a review for this on PA, but another can't do you any harm .. I suppose. I really love this poem. It is so insightful and really made me think about the pain of transformation. Greyback's enjoyment of that pain was terrible to imagine, but so fitting for the depraved beast he was ... and makes Remus' revulsion of himself that much more meaningful.

The wonderful thing about your tritina is that the reader doesn't notice the repetition of the end lines - always the trickiest part. A well-deserved winner (she says through gritted teeth). No, I really mean it. Brilliant idea, and superbly executed. ~Carole~

Author's Response:

Haha, lovely review, dear. I still can't believe it won, because yours kicked so much more ass. I suppose I've always wondered why the hell someone could enjoy being a predatory monster so much. I've had this fixation with Remus lately, so thinking about what makes him, well...him, has become a ponderous affair to me.

I'm glad you liked it, considering I wrote it on my lunchbreak at work while watching Days of our Lives on TV. :D

~Jess

 

Ariana by inspirations
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 2]

Summary: Who killed Ariana Dumbledore? This is about the pain, the guilt, the not knowing.

Categories: Poetry Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Violence

Word count: 174 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
09/17/10 Updated: 09/19/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/19/10 Title: Chapter 1: Ariana

Hello Spire,

Well, this won't be a SPEW quality review, but a few lines to tell you that I like this poem rather a lot. You managed to convey a whole ream of emotions here from guilt, remorse, grief and the agony of not knowing. This was quite wonderful. I', supposing that this is from Albus Dumbledore's POV but actually it could fit Aberforth as well. I think he probably felt some guilt too, although Albus would have shouldered the majority of the burden, I imagine.

As a poetry form, the tritina is hard to get right because it can sound repetitive. I think you avoided that trap by using some normalish words at the end of the lines. It didn't come over as forced in any way. I'm not sure about the last line, though. I think it's too long - and although I love the sentiment expressed I'm wondering if you could chop off the last part (hoping I'm being deceived). The trouble with that is that you lose his hope that he didn't do it. Hmmm, not sure now, perhaps it doesn't matter.

Lovely lyrical poem, Spire. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks, Carole. :) Personally I imagined this to be from Aberforth, but when I read it afterwards I decided it could really fit either brother. I guess it depends on the reader. -hugs- xx

 

Different in the Morning by Gmariam
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 19]

Summary: Seventh year is almost over, and after indulging in the kitchen a bit too much, James inadvertently reveals his deepest fears for the future. Lily realizes he is not quite who she thought he was, and admits to something she had never really considered before.

Categories: James/Lily Genre: Warnings: Substance Abuse

Word count: 12404 Chapters: 2 Completed: Yes
Published:
09/17/10 Updated: 09/30/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 10/01/10 Title: Chapter 2: Part Two-The Day After

"Game?" she asked, eyeing him curiously. "I guess so. Our game." She seemed to think about it. "I like it, our game," she offered. My utter, utter favourite line that just about sums up the whole 'thing' between James and Lily. OMP (adfoot) You have so totally caught this pair. I'm shamefullyfangirling you because you've done this superbly in such a short story. Okay, I had reservations about Lily last time, but here, she's just brilliant. Hmm, I said that was my favourite line but then they went and kissed and I was laughing with them, (and crying too because they're going to die) Damn it, I'm all sad and happy now. I need to get back to some good old James/Lily.

Gina, sorry for the rubbish review, but this is just ... love. I am adding to favourites. *sob* ~Carole~

Author's Response: Ah, I'll take a rubbish review like that any day! Thank you so much for reading the second part. I'm really glad I could get them right (especially considering I hadn't really planned on continuing.) It took me a little while to really figure out the very end. Your comments about Lily did make me think and I fleshed her out just a tad here to get it right. Did you see my use of 'clever dick'? Was that okay? Thanks for that! And thank you so much for the lovely review, it really makes my day. ~Gina :)

 
Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/18/10 Title: Chapter 1: Part One-The Night Before

Hello,

Yes, it's me! Had to read your story because a) it's J/L and I'm on that ship and b) it's written by you. *beams* I like this. I love the premise, and James comes over as wonderfully tortured and very different from the irresponsible prat we usually see. James, in fact, is wonderful here. You have a great understanding of his character.

Your writing as always is wonderfully descriptive. I adore the scenes by the lake and when he's swimming. The plot too is good, simple but very effective.

I do have a nit pick or two (sorry) Sirius's uncle died. Apparently he was also blasted off the family tree, so Sirius was keen on going to pay his respects to a fellow black sheep." Sirius in OOTP says Alphard was blasted off the tapestry because he left him some gold. So, I don't think he'd have been blasted off at the time of the funeral because wills take a month to process according to Hermione and Scrimgeour.

The other thing was that I was unsure about Lily here. She came over as very naive about what was happening in the world. She's going to be in far more danger than pure-blooded James and Sirius, despite them being blood traitors and fighters. Yet she seems almost disconnected from what is going on in the outside world. As a witch who has a real connection with the outside world due to her Muggle parents, in my opinion, she would be far more aware than those who were brought up solely in the magical world. At one point I wanted her to get really angry with James because he was banging on about his worries, whereas she's the one who faces persecution. I'm not saying that James didn't have a right to moan because I think it's clear that he was worried and scared for all the right reasons - including his concern for her. James, as I said, was bang on the money, but Lily felt a bit off in places.

Damn! I feel mean now, because I genuinely loved the story. It flowed well, and had a great story. The moments when he was puking were so funny, I was so pleased he didn't try to kiss her - ha ha ha. I can't wait for part 2.

~Carole~

Author's Response: Hi Carole! Don't feel mean, lol. I appreciate the review and am just glad you came to read this. I really, really enjoyed writing it. Do you remember when Natalie's status said something about writing a drunk character? That's where I got the idea. I don't mind your nitpicks. As for Sirius's uncle, I will reread that bit in OotP. I can tweak that line easily. I still imagine him being a bit of a black sheep (ha - I just got my double meaning, lol!) but perhaps he wasn't blasted off until later. Easy fix, that's why you are the timeline queen! :) As for Lily...hm. I can totally see your point, that's for sure. All I can say is that I deliberately wrote her that way because I wanted them both to be slightly different than usual - ie, James with his fears for the future, and Lily with her slightly naive but hopeful plans for the future. She is ready to move on, excited to be starting her own life - she doesn't share James's trepidation about the future, she's far more positive. I guess that comes across as ignorant, but she doesn't see it affecting her in terms of having to fight like James does. Talking with James makes her realize just what life post-Hogwarts will be like with the war. I address it in the next part but I'll be sure to flesh it out a bit so she is more the character readers know and recognize (even though she is in my head - just got to get that out.) I hope that makes sense, and I hope that you enjoy the next part and how things resolve. Thanks so much for reading this story and leaving such a nice, detailed review! I really appreciate the feedback!! ~Gina :)

 

Patterns in the Smoke by Inclination
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 4]

Summary: "Regulus thinks it’s better than way, easier. He tries not to think of fragile bone-masks and bodies that are already dead when they hit the floor with a hollow thump. " Regulus introspective, Regulus/Snape.

Categories: Dark/Angsty Fics Genre: Warnings: Dubious Consent, Mild Profanity, Sexual Situations, Slash, Substance Abuse, Violence

Word count: 1158 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
09/18/10 Updated: 09/19/10


Reviewer: Equinox Chick Signed
Date: 09/20/10 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

I clicked on this because the pairing intrigued me and I'm glad I did. I like your style of writing very much and thought you portrayed Regulus brilliantly. I think this shows how he got in far to deep to something he didn't fully appreciate when he first became a DE and his reliance on alcohol at the end shows a soul beginning to change.

I'm unsure about Snape. Not because of his eternal 'love' for Lily blah blah blah, but because I can't really see him making the first move like that. I almost feel that it would have been better if Regulus had kissed him first. He never made any moves with Lily and he knew her very well, so to suddenly launch himself at Regulus seems almost out of character.

The scene back at his flat was excellent especially Snapes revelation that he knew the people Regulus had killed. Made me think he'd just killed Lily's parents. I'm slow on the uptake, so was I right?

Good story ~Carole~

Author's Response: Wow. Thankyou so much... it may sound cheesy, but I'm a huge fan of your work, so the fact that you said you liked my writing style is a huge compliment (and this is my cue to turn bright red). I'm really glad you enjoyed Regulus' characterisation... and as for the Snape, part, I guess as I was writing it, it just felt like the right thing to do. I think Snape and Regulus are just two very lonely people... to me, it made sense to throw them together somehow. You were right about the couple Regulus killing being Lily's parents... I wondered if people would notice that, seeing as even my beta didn't :P Thankyou again for your review, I'm glad you enjoyed it :)

 
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