that was lovely - very sad, but very well written. Good job!
Hello! Lovely job on this fic!
Robbed of true familial love until the cold fear of death and harsh reality of war grasped my parents by the throat and they became true parents; protecting not only a legacy of Malfoys’, but their only child. And for once, we became a family during that pitiful time of existence that the Dark Lord reigned from Malfoy Manor. My father was nothing but a shell of the man I once looked up to; my mother was the glue that held us together during that time of distress and trial.
I really liked this line- I think it emphasizes the irony of Malfoy's situation very well. All those years that he spent as the arrogant spoiled boy didn't mean as much as those few months that his family actually had to spend together, and the irony that in times of distress, it is not his arrogant, aggresive father that held them together, but his mother. I liked this part in the book, that the Malfoys became more human in that part of DH, so good job reflecting that here.
I was a lost and broken child at the age of seventeen; fragments of a person I was never meant to be, but always thought I could become.
Hmm, while this was a really good line, I was a bit confused by the end of it- do you mean being a DE? As in he always thought he could become a Death Eater, but now he's only a fragment of one?
I loved the description of Malfoy's relationship with Scorpius, it's very realistic and I liked how you brought out all of Malfoy's feelings, the dark ones and the proud ones, and the happy ones - it makes it that much more well-rounded.
Overall, this is a lovely 'shot about how Malfoy must have been feeling- it's very realistic and I think you've done a lovely job!
Author's Response: Thanks for your lovely review, Evester! XD I don't know exactly what I meant by that line, it was more poetic than anything, and it flowed. It is actually one of my favorite lines of the story.
Very good chapter. Can't wait for the next one! Did you write the sorting hat song - it's very well, er... written. Haha. Anyway, I really like your two characters Luke and Gordon, they are very well developed so far- so I can't wait for more!
Author's Response: Thank you Evester! I certainly did write the sorting hat song, I\'m sorry to say, and I\'ve already had the thorough displeasure of writing more for the other books! I have, after all, had plenty of practice in the beta wanted thread!
\r\nI\'m delighted that you like Luke and Gordon, I\'m rather fond of them myself. The development of their characters is probably the most important aspect of the books, so it\'s good to know they\'ve already got someone watching them. :)
\r\n...and believe you me, more is already on the way...
Another good chapter. I like how you portrayed Luke, Gordon, Bill, and the others very much. I loved the race scene - it was very original and funny, and I can def. see Bill doing the things you had him do, you seem to have him down pat.
Can't wait for more, and I'm willing to bet that this is NOT the last time Luke has a run-in with Snape and those whom I am assuming are Slytherin bullies. LOL.
Author's Response: Thank you very much Evester! That race scene seems to be favourite of most people who\'ve read the book. :) As for Bill, what can I say? It must be a mutual appreciation of long hair that brings me closer to him. :)\r\n\r\nI\'ll try and keep uploading, and you wouldn\'t get very long odds on those two bets either! :) Thanks for reviewing!
In fifth year, Sirius along with James and Peter managed the difficult Animagus transformation. In fifth year, Sirius played the ‘werewolf prank’ on Snape. One was an act of loyalty, brotherhood, and friendship; the other an act of betrayal, vengeance, and recklessness. This story spanning the Marauders' fifth year will deal with both these incidents, as well as Sirius’s increasing rejection of everything having to do with ‘The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black”.
Wow, another really good chapter! I think you show Remus' conflict between his friends and the rules very well, and I especially liked how he was about to tell them off when they finally told him about being animagi. Very well done.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I love getting feedback! I enjoyed writing this chapter a lot because I could throw in that conflict between Remus and the others - and I\'m happy it read realistic to you.
I just found this story and have read the past chapters in one go- and I just wanted to say that this is a reallly excellent story. your characterizations are perfect- and refreshingly not-cliched at all. I love in this chapter in particular how much thought you put into the animagus transformation- I've never thought of what you actually have to do, but your ideas are very realistic. I also loved how you had Peter do it first, everything just fit really well.
Can't wait to read more!
Author's Response: Yay, new reader! Thanks for leaving a review! I\'ve read many, many marauder-era stories, and it\'s hard not to have any cliches, but I do try to stay away from as many as possible and be as original as possible. Since we have no idea how animagus works, I tried to come up with something, so I\'m glad it sounds realistic. Thanks for all your comments. Next chapter is in queue, so hopefully it will be validated soon.
Hi! I really liked this story. I thought you wrote Ron and Hermione really well.
"conniving goblin Griphook"
-LOL this is exactly how I think of him...
"We defeated a troll, You-Know-Who can’t be much different, can he?”
And about the laughing thing, I really liked it. It was very realistic, because a little thing like that WOULD set them off when they were under so much pressure. Especially Ron.
Overall, great story, and I can't wait to see more!
-Perfect Ron humor. I can see him saying this. Loved it!
-Evester from the Badger Bar
Author's Response: Ooh, hi Eve! Thanks for reviewing...you seriously just motivated me to put the next chapter in the queue. I\'ve been putting it off FOREVER...why, I really don\'t know. I\'ve just never had the time to make a couple finishing touches. So...I hope it gets accepted!
*sigh* What a lovely, beautifully written story. I adore your writing and can't compliment it enough...lol. Thanks for this little insight into Albus' life as a kid, and I'm still fangirling the notion of you writing a sequel!
I really liked the little twist you threw in, that Rose Cottage didn't really exist or was like Brigadoon, it was very interesting and I thought it was lovely the way it brought the story full circle with it's mystery and all.
Anyway, you did such a great job with this, as you did with The Letter, and I can't wait to see more!
Author's Response: Gosh, you'll make me blush! Lol! Thanks awfully, and for the fangirl plug for a sequel as well. I haven't decided quite what to do yet, but I'm sure it'll come to me in time. I'm very glad you enjoyed it. Your comments are greatly appreciated.
Oh, I loved this chapter! Very well written. The chosen one thing sounds really interesting -is your story going to cover Albus' life - or is there going to be a sequel?? Please?? haha. Great job though.
Author's Response: I\'m not going to cover a lot of Albus\'s life in this one, just the first few months or so and then an Epilogue that picks up when he\'s about 7 years old. As for a sequel, time will tell. We\'ll see. Thanks for the vote of confidence, though!
Oooh, so the truth comes out! I rather thought Harry was impersonating Lucius Malfoy... I guess not.
I love this story so much, by the way! Great job!
Author's Response: Yes, I fooled a lot of people with that one. I knew everyone would think it was Harry, so of course it COULDN\'T be, could it? Heh, heh! I\'m glad you like it. I\'ll try to get the next one up very soon.
Hi Kayla! I read your story last night, but wasn't logged in to review. So here it is:
I really liked this- so well written! I just have one little thing to suggest: You keep saying that "Rio was one of the boys"- I don't really think it's necessary because you illustrate that beautifully in the scene when she's with the boys in the compartment (or at least I thought so) But other than that, which is really minor anyway, I really liked this and can't wait to see more! see you!
I really liked this chapter- it was well written and got the plot started really well. Haha what a team those two will make- the werewolf and the vampire.
I loved the end- "For once, she felt normal"- it's so in character with what you've told us about Dacia.
Loved it, and can't wait to see more!
Author's Response: I like the sound of that: \"the werewolf and the vampire.\" Won\'t they make such a duo? It\'s funny you mention that last sentence because the last quote of the chapter was what my beta liked.XD I really love that ending, and I\'m glad you pointed it out. Thanks for the review Eve! :D
Ah, excellet start to the story - I love it already. I'm just a little confused though, is Kalama's mother a muggle? (I am supposing she is reading the Daily Prophet) It's interesting that you have her keeping up with the magical world and all that. Anyway, nice start, and I will definitely be back to read the rest ( I don't have time tonight... :P)
Author's Response: I'm glad you like the story. I know Kalama's family can seem a little confusing in the Prologue, so I'll explain. Kalama's mother is a Muggle, yes; but her father and her mother's first husband (not the man yelling at her to get off the roof) was a wizard, making Kalama a halfblood witch. After her father, Joseph, died, Kalama's mother still wanted to remain in touch with the wizard in world for the sake of her daughter, and that is why she reads the magical newspaper. Kalama's little sister, Ewa, though, the yelling man is her father and she is all Muggle. I hope that cleared things up.
I'm back! Oh wow, what a climax. Kalama certainly has her dark side, doesn't she? Can't wait to read the next chapter!
Author's Response: Well, fire is a very passionate element. So we're going to go through a whole gamet of emotions in this story.
I really loved this story- it was so emotional and beautifully written. The line about Lily being the beginning and end and climax was really good and the whole part about Peter was absolutely perfect. I mean, it just seemed so much like Peter's point of view- watching his friends from the sidelines and leaving safely through the "exit doors"- *shiver*
congrats and good job!
Author's Response: The whole thing with Peter was my favorite. Thank you very much, eve!
What happens when you find out your whole life has been a lie? How do you react when the people you trusted, believed in confess to hiding a secret that changes everything you believed about yourself?
Hermione Granger is about to face that situation.
The war is over and life should be simple. She should be planning her future with the man she has loved since she was 11. But now, she doesn’t know who she really is. As she struggles with the grief of lost friends, she also deals with the grief of the loss of everything she believed about herself. Can she open her heart enough to let Ron help her deal with this, or will this secret drive them apart?
Lovely chapter, Terri. I've always wondered what the house would have looked like, and your depiction is very realistic. Great job all around!
Author's Response: Thank you for your review. I just went with what I imagined it would look like from the clip in the movie. The next chapter is still at the house, so once the queue opens, I'll submit that. Stay tuned, lots more to come. Terri
Wow, what a cliffie. LOL. Anyway, I am just reviewing for the first time here, and I wanted to say that I love your writing style and this story, even though we don't know what's going on yet. LOL. I also liked Harry's speech to Snape, and him saying he may never forgive him, it feel much more realistic than trying to make Harry suddenly, like, love Snape. Great job.
Author's Response: Thank you for your review. Each chapter I have written just seems to end on a cliffhanger. As for Harry\'s speech to Snape, that was one of the easiest parts to write. I\'m glad you enjoyed it. It was what I pictured Harry saying if he got the chance to talk to him after DH. Thanks Again. Terri
Just popping back in to say you are NOT a bad writer, you are a lovely writer! LOL.
Author's Response: Thank you. I have a problem with self-depreciation. But that definitely went toward my ego! I better go deflate my head, too. . . haha. Thank you again for the o-mazing review and all your support on the forums! ~Katie
Aww, this is good! Very well written. I'm not really sure why Hermione and Ron stopped hanging out, even if they didn't want to be in a 'relationship,' but the emotions themselves are really well written. Good job relating the story to the song, as well! I've always wanted to try a song-fic, and there are a lot of good songs out there, haha.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! About the whole relationship thing. . . I was having some difficulties with that. I decided short and sweet was best, but now I wish I had explained it a little more thoroughly. The problem is, everything made so much sense in my head, I thought everyone else would catch on just as quick. . . I\'m such a bad writer, lol. Thank you again for the great review! ~Katie
Very good! I can't wait to read more of this! I loved how Sirius and Remus seem to have a big role in Harry's life, I've always felt so bad that Harry didn't know them growing up. Good luck with the rest!
Author's Response: Sirius more so than Remus because Remus has so many problems with his life, but I agree. After hearing about the Marauders and such, I\'ve been wondering for a long time how it might be different if Harry knew them and got to grow up with them. ^_^