Mahogany_wand is a student hailing from the marvelous US of A. She enjoys writing, algebra class, horseback riding, and acting. Her favorite thing to write is poetry, she liked learning about slope intercept form, she rides a horse named Poco, and she played an appleseller in the musical Annie. She also very much enjoys reading, sleeping, and playing Zoo Tycoon, as well as Pokemon cards with her siblings.
A little bit more about her for her stalkers: (hello Stalker. I am doing fine today, thank you for checking)
Books: Harry Potter, The Priness Diaries, anything by Neil Gaiman, The Thief Lord, Wicked
Movies The Princess Bride, The Phantom of the Opera, Avatar, Breakfast at Tiffany’s
Actors Johnny Depp, Rollo Weeks, Audrey Hepburn, Gerard Butler, Marylyn Monroe
Artists Vincent Van Gough, Louise Nevelson, Picasso
Bands Coldplay, Green Day, U2, The Killers, Death Cab for Cutie, among others
Poets William Carlos Williams FTW! e. e. cummings and Edgar Allen Poe, too.
Musicals Annie, Phantom of the Opera, Wicked, Singing in the Rain, Kiss Me Kate
Quotes “Dream as if you’ll live forever, live as if you’ll die today.” “Dreaming about being an actress is much more exciting than actually being one.” “I don’t want to be alone, I want to be left alone.”
A note about reviews: (please read!)
M_W truly appreciates reviews, and reads and cherishes every single one. However, because she has an awful tendency to procrastinate about anything that sticks its head under her nose, she may take a while in responding. Thanks!
Kill the Snake
A poem about how Neville must kill Nagini
The Black Lake
A poem about (surprise, surprise) the Black Lake at Hogwarts.
What is Love?
After Lily’s death, will Snape find love ever again? After all, what the heck is love?
Don’t Hate Me Because I’m a Witch
Of all things you can hate your sister for, being a witch is the least of the problems.
Teddy Lupin finds some very unlikely friends in a rainstorm as a child.
Draco, Why Not Me?
Pansy laments over her relationship with our favorite blonde Slytherin at the latter’s wedding.
During the 1920s, a witch from a small town in California runs away from home to reach her top potential.
Summary: This is book two in the "Potter's Pentagon" trilogy. Read "Potter's Pentagon: The Five" first, myesss? Cool.
WARNING: This story contains French people, an internal monologue about a blue orange, adolescent facial hair, good old-fashioned snogging, superstitious truck drivers, a portrait who calls everyone "Mavis," a zoo break-in, some very strange clothes, romantic conflict galore, and Ron Weasley's caffeine addiction. And worst of all, Professor Zabini!
Hogwarts is hosting the Triwizard Tournament, and when one of the members of Potter's Pentagon is selected to represent the school, much excitement ensues. Simultaneously, elections are being held for Minister of Magic, and things are getting busy at the Ministry.
Not to mention the fact that Jordan's made a new Muggle friend without informing her of the itty-bitty fact that he's magical, Haley has found an enchanted diary of dubious origin, Ted's met a werewolf from Beauxbatons, and Emma... well, Emma's not having a good year.
And what exactly is Ivy up to, anyway?
Everyone has secrets. But in the end, the truth will have to come out.
Starring Best Male Original Character runner-up Jordan Potter, Best Female Original Character Nominees Ivy Potter, Emma Weasley, Haley Potter, and Giorgi Anderson, and Best Male Original Character nominee Ted Lupin! Nominated for Best Post-Hogwarts story in the 2008 Quicksilver Quill Awards!
Funnily enough, I know some people veeeery much like your characters. For instance: My brother. He is JUST LIKE Jordan! My friend the_weird_one even calls him Jordan. Also, once in my drama class I met a pair of twins named Haley and Jordan. And the thing about that was Haley looked just like Haley! So yeah. I totally love this chapter, and can't wait for the next one! One last thing: I think Lee is Lily Evans. Thats all! Keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Oh my gosh, people refer to people in real life as people from my story?!?!?! Sorry, that was a bit excitable.
Anyway, it\'s very neat that there are twins named Haley and Jordan. I read that that was one of the most popular sets of twin names in England in 2004 (the year Haley and Jordan were born), which is one reason why I picked those names. YES, I HAVE NO LIFE. ^_^
Summary: If a rose is called by any other name, does it smell as sweet? To Scarlet never realized how much fear a name could provoke. Throughout her life, the name Tonks had become as familiar as her right arm. She is estatic when she receives her letter inviting her to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Despite her happiness, she is confused at the name on the letter. How could one name transform friends into enemies? Who is Scarlet Black? But more importantly, who is she?
This is what she wants to know.
aha! So Regulus is her Dad!
Love it! Keep updating!
Author's Response: But wait, I haven\'t guarranted anything yet! *Does somewhat evil laugh*
Summary: What happens when Luna challenges her friends to a game of Truth or Dare?
hahahahaha... Please update!
Author's Response: I have the next chapter ready, as soon as the mods say that the queue is accepting again!
hahahahaha... Please update!
Author's Response: I have the next chapter ready, as soon as the mods say that the queue is accepting again!
Of Pureblood Dances, Secret Disguises, and Glass Slippers by R_Ravenclaw
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 30]
Summary: In this spoof of Cinderella, Ginny is sent on Auror business to Draco's party in which he has to find a wife. He becomes entranced with the disguised Ginny, who finds she doesn't hate him as much as she thought she would… or at all?
Dun dun dunn... Awesome story so far! can't wait for the next chapter!
Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums: A Potter's Pentagon Love Story by Schmerg_The_Impaler
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 266]
Summary: A companion piece to the Potter's Pentagon trilogy... it's better if you've read the Potter's Pentagon trilogy, but you don't necessarily have to.
It's five years after Emma Weasley and her chums graduated from Hogwarts. Ted and Ivy are married, Haley is working at Madame Puddifoot's while trying desperately to break into show business, Jordan's doing whatever it is he does, and Emma is an Auror trainee working as a guard at the Chudley Cannons' stadium. The Cannons have actually been doing much better lately, due to their new star Beater, Tyrone Thomas. Unfortunately, Tyrone is Emma's ex-boyfriend. OH, THE AWKWARDNESS.
Follow Emma through her awkward adventures told in her usual insane way, as she experiences angst, hilarity, obnoxiously strange people, misadventures involving a deceptively dashing cad, Haley's wedding, the birth of Ted and Ivy's baby, and her own eventual descent into LURRRVE.
Written for the marvellous Vindictus Viridian's Pride and Prejudice NEWTs class on the Fanfiction Beta Boards, based on Jane Austen's fantastic novel, "Pride and Prejudice.".
Nominated in the 2008 Quicksilver Quills Awards for Best Non-Canon Romance Story! And its lovely (haha) heroine, Emma Weasley, received two nominations for Best Female Original Character, while Haley Potter and Ivy Potter each received one! Thanks so much, guys!
I Looooove the Tyrone song!!!!!! And all of the Tyronion in this chapter, basically. I still want more Tyremma, though! TYREMMA ROX!!!!! Onh a differant note, I loved the Twilight reference! HE WAS SPARKLY!!!!! Although you mentioned that you hated Edward, maybe you should read New Moon because there's like, NO Edward in it. (Boo hoo) But yeah.
Author's Response: Thanks so much! I had lots of fun with the Tyrone song. And in case you're curious, there will be SO much more Tyremma to come. Especially in forthcoming chapters. I did read New Moon-- I read it before Twilight! Funnily, I don't really like Jacob, either. I think he's more interesting than Edward, but honestly, he scares me! However, even though I don't like Edward, Haley SURE does!
As I was trying to find The Dark Lord’s Blog to read again, I found out that PP-PAPJP had been updated without me noticing.
Ivy was sort of an emotional mess in this chapter, wasn’t she? Ted got attacked so she was sad, then she got all teary because she saw he was alive… pregnant women, I tell you. I had a bit of a problem with how when Ivy was sobbing she soaked through the newspaper. I think this is a bit of an overused cliché. I also think it is humanly impossible to soak through a newspaper by crying unless you are an anime character.
The Tyrone part was funny. I think that underneath all his bravado, Tyrone is just a down-to-earth weirdo who likes gardening. He was very nice to give Emma his tee shirt. I don’t know why he was so upset about her tracking mud on his carpet—after all, he lives in Godric’s Hollow surrounded by wizards so he could just cast “scourgrify!” and it’s all better.
I think that Wolfgang was used for a bit of comic relief this chapter. After all, all you see of him was a letter including his extremely extended full name. I thought that was what my English teacher says is “borderline silly—the point between believability and complete goofiness” or something like that. It’s just there for the purpose of being ridiculous.
I thought your PAP summary was hilarious. I really have to pick that book up this summer. I can only imagine how the classic will play into your story.
Keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Hey, there! Ivy definitely was an emotional mess... oh, but she didn't soak through a whole newspaper! Just one sheet of newspaper, which is very thin material! That would be hilarious if she soaked through the whole paper, though. And yeah, I didn't think about tracking mud on the carpet!
As for Wolfgang's name, though, there is some significance behind that, not just because it's silly-- though I did use that for comic relief. Not only are his names symbolic, so are his brother's-- but we don't know them yet! MWAHAHA! One thing I will say, though, is that Wolfgang was named for Mozart... but his brother is the musical one, not him.
I was a very happy camper when Tyrone and Emma tangoed. Tyremma 4 eva! (Yes, that is their ship name.) Oh, but that porcelain kitten? What IS Haley, like an Umbridge wannabe? Sorry. I'm feeling sort of like Emma today. Bad Ted. Grr... But otherwise a fantabulous story! And I can't wait to read PPIII! The past, right? I'm hoping for some Tyremma juice...
Author's Response: Whoa, did they tango? I thought they semi-waltzed! Did my hormones kick into overdrive and make the little scoundrels tango instead? As for the porcelain kitten... hey, Haley likes cats. And I have a few porcelain kittens of my own. *Shrug* I used to buy them from the dollar store obsessively when I was like seven or eight. Hey, I thought I made up the ship name Tyremma like three years ago! Great minds think alike! If I'm not mistaken, I think PPIII (catchy name!) was just accepted. And there's LOADS of Tyremma to come, I'll tell you that!
WHY MUST TYROONIE BE SO MEAN?!?!?!?!?!? Although I am a rather Roonster fangirl, so I guess he isn't that meany bobini zhuccini.
Author's Response: Hahaha... meany bobini zucchini... throw \'Zabini\' in there for good measure... Thanks for reading!
Summary: “Parked all right, then?” Ron asked Harry. “I did. Hermione didn’t believe I could pass a Muggle driving test, did you? She thought I’d have to Confund the examiner.
“No I didn’t,” said Hermione. “I had complete faith in you.”
- DH P604, UK Edition
The story of how Ron learned to drive.
Hannah! I was amazed at how well written this was. Ron and Hermione were so in character that it seemed like this could have actually been a companion piece to the HP books. I was amazed at how well you captured the driving experience (something I don't know yet, but I can imagine) and getting your license in Great Britain. This story was absolutely brilliant and I can't express how much I enjoyed reading it! ~M_W
He loves her, but they are over. She loves him, but hates him, too. Neither is willing to take the step needed to get back to each other. Then, one ring changes it all. Can she forgive him in time to save him from himself?
Warning: I tried an open ending. Rated for use of expletives...
Wow. Just wow. This story was absolutely beautifully written!
I think that you were able to accomplish a difficult task; writing Draco/Ginny without getting out of character.
i think that the lyrics were in all the right places, and the story had an almost poetic flow.
What a great story!
Aw, thank you! It's one thing to find out that someone likes my story. It's quite another to hear someone review it thoughtfully. It's funny; I was trying really hard to keep Draco/Ginny from getting stereotypical or OOC. I can't even listen to that song anymore. I had it on repeat for forever and a day while I was writing thes tory and now every time I hear it I have to turn the radio off. It's pretty funny, actually. But I digress. Thank you.
Summary: It is a blustery day in Hogsmeade, and Arthur and Bill Weasley are minding their own business. That is, until they each receive letters instructing them to mind each other's business in a most intrusive and rather final sort of way.
But this is not just about Arthur and Bill. They happen to be a small part of a much bigger, much more ambitious scheme that they know nothing about, run by a frighteningly powerful organization. What exactly is going on, and what exactly will Arthur and Bill do?
Written as an entry for the Gauntlet, by Schmerg_The_Impaler of Hufflepuff house (most of the Bill bits) and Neville's Girl of Slytherin house (most of the Arthur bits). Probably the strangest thing either of us has ever written.
Oh, my sparkly Edward! BITE ME! Sorry. I am a bit odd at times. You mentioned in a review that Edward Cullen isn't really your type, so that PROBABLY meand Jacob Black is. I'm just guessing.
This is an oddly cool story. I think it's cool! Hooray for oddness!
Author's Response: Hahahaha. My best friend is madly in love with Jacob Black, but from the little I've seen of him, he seems... angsty and emotional and overdramatic. Isn't there anyone who's happy and fun and awkward and goofy and eccentric?
Summary: The final installment in the Potter’s Pentagon Trilogy. Read “The Five” and “The Truth” first, myess? Okay!
WARNING! Contains Muggle adventures in Diagon Alley, unusual eyebrows, cheesy clichés galore, psycho Ted, the not-so-lost years of Merlin, a school-wide singalong, the old potato joke, Tyrone’s Princess Bride obsession, Emma’s stubborn denial of the existence of Tyrone’s mustache, a graphic death, a joke shop product as a major plot device, hobo Jordan, Jordan hugging, Jordan pulling pranks, time travel, the Love Shack, angst, and worst of all, Professor Zabini.
It’s the sixth year for Potter’s Pentagon and company, and our heroes learn that in the wizarding world, coming of age has a somewhat weightier significance. Students are busy with an Inter-House Unity Project, Jordan is having weird dreams, Pansy and Ophidias Malfoy have been released from Azkaban, Professor Zabini has a mysterious project of his own, and almost everyone is acting strangely. Meanwhile, at the Ministry of Magic, a man with a vendetta against Ron Weasley is trying his hardest to get him in the biggest trouble possible. Is the only way to save him to travel into the past?
New talents are discovered, new friendships form and old ones change, pasts are dredged up, and, of course, there’s lots of good old-fashioned snogging. And one of the five kills for the first time… while another becomes a casualty of war.
Starring 2008 Quicksilver Quills Best Male Original Character runner-up Jordan Potter, Best Female Original Character nominees Ivy Potter, Haley Potter, Emma Weasley, and Giorgi Anderson, and Best Male Original Character nominee Ted Lupin! Nominated for 2008 Quicksilver Quills Best Post-Hogwarts Story.
So today I’m trying something new and writing my review on my Word Processor before I submit it, a first for all mahogany wands.
For starters! This chapter has been out for over a week, and I’m only just getting around to reviewing it! Maybe I’m just lazy, or maybe I’ve been too busy reading Reaperman by Terry Pratchett, who matches Giorgi in sheer eccentricity. Many apologies, Schmergo.
I would like to comment on Ivy. Being my least favorite character, I am rather biased against her, but I must commend her for her stubbornness.
Haley always makes me smile. Her chocolate thing with Lupin was hilarious. Antoly is so sweet! I think Haley should marry him in PAPJP, if she has to marry someone.
Only one question- how will Teddy’s diabetes play a part in Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums? Maybe it won’t…
I like this whole chapter, on a scale of 1-5 *stars* I would give it *2.75* good, but not great. Can’t wait for next chapter!
Author's Response: REAPERMANNNN! Great book! Good for you, I love Discworld to bits. My favourite books in that series are "Going Postal" and "Night Watch." No need to apologize for not reviewing; other people should be apologizing for reading my stories instead if Discworld. Ivy is my least-favourite character as well, but I do like how stubborn she is, especially later in this book (honestly, I think you'll probably like Ivy at the end of the book-- I do, at least).
Haley DOES get married in "Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums," but I can't tell you anything more about that. The only reason why I'm even saying that much is because it's in the summary! I wuvs Ani, though...
The diabetes thing isn't in "Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums," because that story does not include spoilers from "The Past." A lot of things that happen in "The Past" don't apply in "Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums" because I posted that first. Also, Ted's diabetes isn't important to the story as a whole-- it was really more of a red herring, to be honest. Thanks for the reviiiieeeeew!
This review will be short, since my arm is fore from my flu shot and I need to go put ice on it. I know that's an awful excuse, but I'm just kind of sore. Like Emma's bum. Ha ha. That part made me laugh. This chapter was adorable, I lurved the Tyremmaness. Tyronion is so cute with Fido! I like toads.
Also, just randomly, I got sorted on the MNFF beta boards! I am a proud claw, or Sprout! Oh, and you wanted someone to hug you cuz you're Hufflepuff? Well, I am mahogany_wand of the Ravenclaw house and I'm hugging my Hufflepuff, Schmergo!
I was sort of sad this chapter, though, cuz absolutely no Ted in person! No Mr Sunny Side Up! *Tear tear*
I loved this chapter, and on a scale of one to ten I would give it a 9, for Tyremma juice! Woot! Update PAPJP sooooon!
Author's Response: Awww, sorry about the flu shot. And glad you liked the gag, I edited that in at the last second just before submitting. COngrats for getting into Ravenclaw! Unfortunately, you were the only person to hug me, but that's okay! Sorry about the lack of Ted, but the previous chapter was very Tedfull, and I promise you'll end up seeing a lot more of him. And I'll tried to update P&PP soon!
EEEEE! More Potter's Pentagon! I am super scared for the 5. I DON"T WANT ANYONE TO DIE! And Ronnie- poos in trouble, too. CLIFFIE! Fantabulous story so far, cant wait for more! (That rhymes!)
Author's Response: Hello! It's lovely to get reviews from you again! Well, you know someone dies in this story, but not until chapter twenty-something, so nothing to worry about yet. Hope you enjoy the rest of it!
Hoorah! Hooray! PPIII was updated! This was a wonderful chapter! The disgusting food contest made me LOL. Only Tyrone would eat something like that. Although I think if Ted had been playing he would have totally won. After all, his favorite food seems oddly like the food Tyrone was eating... Hmm...
Oh, Schmergo! You mean, mean, author! How could you do this to us?! A cliffhanger? NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! PLEASE UPDATE ASAP!!!!!!
Author's Response: Thanks so much! You know, I think Ted definitely WOULD have won, but the thing is, Ted wouldn't think of mixing together things for the point of being disgusting. He'd probably sit there looking bemused and go, "There's nothing at this table that would be gross mixed together! Everything looks good! What do I do?" ^_^ Now, now, now, do you even know me at all? Of course I give you a cliffhanger ending to a chapter! That's what makes me Schmerg_The_Impaler! Mwahahahahaha!
Aww, this chapter is very nice! I don't think I've reviewed it since it's been out, but I've been wrong before. So! Onto the review-ing.
I liked this chapter. Not my favorite, but I liked it. I liked the introduction of Anatoly, he seems cute. (Even though I've read ahead, I'm speaking as if this is the latest chapter. Just because of a CERTAIN LACK OF UPDATES.) I liked the Jordy-poo in this chapter. He seems very angsty, and there's a lot of him in it. That didn't really make sense, but I don't feel like going back to change it.
I'd rate the chapter a 7.5/10, good, but not fantabulous. I understand that it was necessary to the plot, though. Generally chapters are.
On a totally different note, I'm reading Maskerade now, which is just the Phantom of The Opera, but Discworld-ized. It's amazing! I kept thinking of your Harry Potter Phantom son parodies while I listened to it, though. I wish there was a good Discworld fanfiction website...
Author's Response: Thank you! I have fun with Anatoly... I ended up liking him a lot more than I thought I would when I first created him. You might like the next chapter... it's very... Jordan-ful. Ooh, I LOVE Maskerade. I think the witches books are underrated; they're hilarious. (I'd LOVE to play Nanny Ogg in a play of any of the witches books; I think I'd be quite wonderful at it, heh.) I don't know if I'd want to write Discworld fanfiction, though, because what makes it so good is Terry Pratchett's lovely writing style, and it really wouldn't work without that style. And trying to impersonate it would just be a pale similarity.
OH NOOOOOOO!!!!! TEDWARD!!!!! I hope he doesn't die. And about what Capshaw did, with the whole Zabini/Potato thing, once my friend the_weird_one did that with one of our teachers, and once she did it with Miley Cyrus. Oh, and I loooove the Tyrone song! There's this boy that was in my English class who TWO (the lovely weirdo) and I call Tyrone, cause he's JUST LIKE Tyrone Thomas! JUST LIKE HIM! So we've been annoying him with that song. Yurp.
Ted is soooooo like Seth from Twilight! They're both nice, pure, and werewolves. Mmm hmm. I think that's all... OH! Wait! I WANT TYREMMA JUICE! And more of the wonderful Tyronion in general.
FINALLY!!!!! Great chapter, and Update PAPJP, PLEASE!!! I'm a desperate little monkey, here!
Author's Response: *Pets Teddy* Oh wow, The_Weird_One did something like that? Sounds hilarious... as for that Tyrone guy in your class... awww, that's great. Is he nice? Because if there really is such thing as a stereotypical 'dumb jock' who happens to be impossibly good-looking AND nice AND a fan of "The Princess Bride," then I think the world would implode. You know, Ted does remind me of Seth a bit. Guess what, though? My favourite character from Twilight is Leah. (I'm not a fan of the series at all. Leah amuses me, though. And sometimes I like Emmett, too.)
Hoorah! An update! this chapter had a lot of teh Jorjums, so I liked it. I thought it was so awesome that he's a seer! The only thing this was missing was Giorgi. She needs to send Jordan a crazy email! I'm short on time, so sorry about this short review. Great chapter, 9/10. Very, very good. Yay! Also, just some random trivia, did you know that cows are magnetic? And the 2009 Merriam-Webster dictionary is going to include the word meh? Have to go do my homework. More apologies for the short review.
Author's Response: Thank you so much! But... I never said that Jordan was a Seer. He is *considering* the *possibility.* Luckily, we will get to see Giorgi IN PERSON in either one or two chapters. Also, I had no clue that cows are magnetic,but I DID hear about 'meh,' and I got very excited! I told my brother, but he didn't seem as excited. He just said, "Meh."
Poor Ivy! I can't believe she still has to visit the Malfoys!
On a lighter note thought, I thought that the picture of the 4 babies was so cute! I think Jordan's expression totally suits him. Great story, can't wait for more!
Also, long live toad! And slimy but cute Tyrones!
Author's Response: Thanks so much! Yeah, I feel bad for Ivy... but I also feel bad for the Malfoys! They don't know what they've got coming! ^_^ I had so much fun making up the part about them as babies... it has nothing to do with the plot, I just put it in there for fun.
I was at the zoo today with my friend, who I will call Xim (because he likes Invader Zim and he was Cardinal Ximenez for Halloween) and we were talking about what animals looked the tastiest, and we saw this really cute frog, and this little girl in a Hannah Montana shirt goes, "IT"S SO ADORABLE!" And he goes, "It looks delicious!" And the girl looked absolutely terrified. We were just cracking up.