I am eighteen and cheerful and in love with words, and one day I shall write something that ends happily.
This was so sweet, and fit so neatly together, especially how you used Victoire's name to make your point. A gold star for referencing Fred--I think I can count the number of fanfictions I've read him in on one hand.
Teddy's POV was a nice touch, as well. You gave him depth and demonstrated his feelings without him knowing them, which is no easy feat. It was a good story, and I enjoyed reading it!
Author's Response: Thank you! I really love Teddy and Victoire\'s characters, so it was fun to write them. :]
Wow. That was good--and serious. I've never really thought about how Lucius was affected by Azkaban, and how that in turn would affect Draco and Narcissa. The little shouting fete was fantastic too. Makes me feel sorry for Draco. Bravo, OliveOil_Med!
Author's Response: Thanks, I\'m glad you like it so much. I once had a professor who was once a hardcore Vietnam protester, and he told us all about returning soldiers and PTSD, and that\'s sort of what inspired Lucius. Anyway, I\'m happy you think I\'m taking good care of your baby.
You've got a pretty unique take on Lily and James here, and I Like It. Lily was hesitant and slightly insecure, and she felt real in a lot of ways the fiery untouchable Lilys don't. James was fantastic as well--usually he's described as a golden boy, but the "bad boy" theme really worked, and his speech and manner were convincing and confident.
I usually have trouble reading first-person fanfic--sometimes I don't make it past the first few paragraphs--but this one drew me in. Positively devoured it. *applauds*
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it! The bad boy idea just drew me in too.
You are sort of a genius.
If we were doing points, I would give you very, very many for being well-researched. Other than a story written by a friend, yours is the only one I've ever read where Luna's sons were referenced. You've no idea how happy that makes me! And more points for referring to Charlie's bachelorhood.
It was a tad bit of the Romeo-and-Juliet stereotype, and Scorpius had a few corny lines, but the title line was utterly perfect and overall it was sweet. The numbers confused me slightly--at first I thought they were to provide some chronology for the story but then there wasn't a 2. Maybe the 5 should have been a 2 and the 6 should have been a 5?
Anyway, it was a lovely read and cheering and now I'm going to go watch the HBP trailer for the eighth time and drink coffee and be in a good mood. Cheers!
Author's Response: Thank you! :) I wanted to make the setting as well-rounded as possible, so I made sure to reference the next-generation facts (I almost missed that Lysander and Lorcan were twins though, oops!) And, yes, I know it was a bit fluffy in places, hehe, trust me, it's not my usual style, but I'm glad you liked it overall. (Ah! But trust me, no R&J intentions! I just found it difficult to ignore the fact that Weasleys and Malfoys don't mix well - plus the story request called for family conflict). Also, there is a 2 - I just ran back and double-checked. It's right after the 1. Enjoy the HBP trailer, I know I certainly did! And thank you very much for the review! :D
Hurray for angry Hermione!
That scene in Malfoy Manor was so, so intense, and your portrayal of Ron's helplessness (which had a sort of post-traumatic stress feel to it) was utterly fantastic. God, I love those two.
The birds line was my favourite. Only criticism would be that the second to last paragraph seemed a little contrived, maybe just didn't sound quite like him.
Great interaction, good story. Cheers!
Author's Response: Thanks for taking the time to review! I always found the scene in Malfoy Manor very interesting - especially in regards to Ron and Hermione, and wondered about the after effect of it on them. Of course, they never really have any time to sit and brood about it, so I wondered how it might finally surface. I imagined it being something that terrified Ron for many nights afterwards, and something that might slightly hinder him (if you get what I mean) so I'm so pleased to hear I pulled that off okay! They really are fantastic, aren't they? :) I'm sorry the second last paragraph wasn't to your liking; I didn't think I'd overdone it, but hey, there you go! Once again, thanks for leaving your thoughts. I really apprreciate it!
I don't know what inspired you to do this in second person, but in writing it so you got into Grindelwald's head more easily than you could have managed in any other POV. There was a sharpness and a drive to his thoughts. It wasn't perhaps quite dark enough, and I figured Dumbledore's infatuation was unrequited, but it was still unique and well-done. Good story.
Author's Response: Thank you!!
That was good. Really, really good. As in, I had to keep going and read the other two chapters before I came back to review.
Al is interesting in Slytherin. I'm not sure that's really where he'd be, but Slytherin Al NextGen is the most fun. Scorpius in Ravenclaw with family difficulties is also fun, and he had a quick tongue and enough dignity that he could be still a Malfoy in demeanor and yet be totally different from his father in almost every way.
Simon is cool. I like him. That almost never happens with OCs for me, but he was necessary to give the story a bit of balance, and had personality to match. Bravo.
Slytherin has double potions with Gryffindor, not Ravenclaw, but if they're in their NEWT levels, they're all lumped together, right?
That was lovely and long and oh so twisted. I can't believe this chapter hasn't gotten more comments. You had a lot of everything-going-wrong moments, and every time Scorpius tried to fix it or blame someone else it just got worse. Explosive and fun.
Mr Malfoy was not a likeable character. The...unlikeableness wasn't a bad thing, but he radiated an eccentricity, clung to the old ways and the past with an aloof desperation more reminiscent of Lucius than Draco. Also, Simon and Rose were in the beginning of the chapter a bit, but neither really show up after the first scene. Maybe a letter or a Floo, some mention to indicate they haven't completely disappeared would have been nice.
Tension was good, though. You really seem to have thought it out. The house elf's speech, the scene in the Shack, the article and Al moving on with Aiden, and of course Draco's hostility all make Scorpius' poor treatment of Al understandable, even if Al didn't deserve it. And Al was appropriately snarky in the end.
*skips off to review last chapter*
All's well ends well. *smiles contentedly*
Angry Scorpius was probably was my favorite thing in this chapter, but Astoria and Draco's howler was a close second. I was laughing my head off while they were interrupting each other, it was brilliant. And then Lily's outburst right after that, and James "looked quite beyond himself"? Got to be the understatement of the century.
Yeah, once Scorpius got going, it was like he couldn't stop. Besting Aiden in defense of Al...when he and Al weren't on good terms...ack, it made me happy.
the Chinese thing was a nice touch. Good story. Cheers!
Ha! This was a riot.
Biased as I am against third person, this story was really funny, cute, and loaded with foreshadowing. You probably could have cut the earlier bit about corrupting Harry, unless the gentlemanly talk was the corruption, because that just leaves us wondering what he would have done.
I think you only did it in one place, about halfway through--lady's man, instead of ladies' man.
Oh, and the Madame Puddifoot's line was a gem. Much enjoyed it. Cheers!
Author's Response: Thank you for the kind words and the corrections, as well as taking the time to review!
No one stole from Scorpius Malfoy unless he allowed it.
*A Scorpius/Rose Halloween story*
This is pretty cute, a nice quick read with a good Scorpius and a dollop of the old House rivalries to make it run. Very much in the Halloween spirit and all.
I've no doubt you'll manage Nanowrimo just fine, but best of luck to you anyway. Cheers!
I think there will always be House rivalries--ensuring fun for writers as well as readers. ;)
50K words in a month is more than I've ever written in that short a time span, but I'll do it if it...well...makes everyone want to kill me for acting mental, LOL.
‘I thought he would come… I expected him to come,’ he said, ‘I was, it seems, mistaken.’ Then Harry Potter stepped out of nowhere, and silence fell so completely that the Death Eaters could hear the fire as it crackled, and the breath of the massive giants, and the chink of a small stone that Potter dropped – ”
“Potter dropped a stone?” Roxanne interrupted, frowning.
“Yeah,” Scorpius replied, bemused.
The title sums it all up, really. Roxanne Weasley doesn’t spend EVERY Hallowe’en wandering lost in the Forbidden Forest, duelling masked villains and battling forest trolls. Not without a good reason, anyway.
A next-gen fic written for the Ravenclaw in-house Hallowe’en rarepair challenge.
unusual pairing, cute story. kudos for referencing one of the hallows and george's daughter. I enjoyed reading it. Cheers!
Author's Response: Yay, thanks! Great to hear you actually enjoyed it. I didn't think anyone would, to be honest! Thanks for the review!