Penname: Archaeopteryx [Contact]
Real name: Accio Name!
Member Since: 11/02/06
Website:
Beta-reader: 0
Status: Member
Bio:
I love unusual ships (but I'll read any of them, really) and most humor, but I don't write too often.

Yes, I know something messed up on All They Wanted (previously All You Wanted, changed for copyright reasons) when I submitted it that kept it from being spaced correctly.
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Favorite Stories
 

Snapshots of Sirius by Slian Martreb
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 7]

Summary: Five snapshots of Remus's life with Sirius.

Categories: Remus/Sirius Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Sexual Situations, Slash

Word count: 1941 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
12/12/06 Updated: 12/22/06


Summary: What happens when you cross Ginny Weasley with the death of Harry, a tyrannic Voldemort, unwanted fame, and the betrayal of her best friend? You get a very pissed off Ginny, with an agenda for revenge.

A dystopic version of what happens after the final battle, and a bad (in a good way) Ginny that certainly takes her revenge on Voldemort in spades. The 'girl-power' super heroine you've all been waiting for- brought over from another site due to popular demand!

All lyrics are copyrighted by the band Garbage, and no infringement is intended- I thank them for inspiring this plotbunny!

Categories: Alternate Universe Genre: Warnings: Alternate Universe, Violence

Word count: 52833 Chapters: 13 Completed: Yes
Published:
08/23/06 Updated: 12/20/06


Broken Enigma by Tygerlily
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 71]

Summary: In a post war Hogwarts Hermione discovers a devastating secret that shakes her world and causes her to take a step back and re-evaluate everything within her life.

Categories: Hermione/Snape Genre: Warnings: Alternate Universe, Sexual Situations, Violence

Word count: 38774 Chapters: 10 Completed: No
Published:
04/16/06 Updated: 12/13/06


How Predictable! by HPwizzzard
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 126]

Summary: The Marauders are having their first Divination lesson, and they quickly realize what a waste of time it is. In order to liven things up, Siriusmakes a few predictions without the aid of tea leaves. Obviously, he's no Seer, because there's no way James and Lily will ever get married, Peter will become an evil minion, or Remus will fall for Sirius' baby cousin... right?

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1721 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
12/11/06 Updated: 12/13/06


Summary: Lord Voldemort's own slightly twisted take on the classic poem, "The Night Before Christmas." Also, a sequel to my other Christmas fic, "Tom Riddle's 12 Days of Christmas!"

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 583 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
12/09/06 Updated: 12/13/06


Summary: This fic picks up right where HBP leaves off. Will Ron and Hermione FINALLY act on their feelings? Harry regrets his decision to dump Ginny, but will he do anything about it? Bill and Fluer's wedding is a hotbed of chaos and romance.

Categories: Ron/Hermione AND Harry/Ginny Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 30299 Chapters: 10 Completed: No
Published:
12/12/05 Updated: 12/10/06


Mission Implausible by remus R us
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 24]

Summary: A covert operation is launched to retrieve Voldemort from Muggledom. But what do you call an operation that involves the hormonal saviour of wizardkind, his adenoidal comic side-kick, and their thinking hat wannabe bimbette; a harmless (mostly) werewolf, his canine friend and their clumsy associate; a snivelly wizard and a known felon? Surely, Mission Implausible? A sequel to Casting Grouch.






I have not updated in a while as my PC crashed. Just wanted to tell you all, "I'll be back!"

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: Alternate Universe, Sexual Situations

Word count: 4674 Chapters: 2 Completed: No
Published:
11/01/06 Updated: 12/08/06


An Unclear Past by Winged Artemis
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 52]

Summary: It's years after the trio is out of Hogwarts, Harry's found all of the Horcruxes, Voldemort's dying slowly and the Death Eaters are receding. All of the trio are married, and life is swell. But with one last flourish, Voldemort attacks Harry and Ron. The two defeat Voldemort, but lose their memories of their past since their first year, along with You-Know-Who, leaving Hermione, Ginny, the Weasleys and Harry and Ron's kids help nurse them back to sanity.


Author's Note: The Violence is mild in the first and fourth chapter, there is a bit, so I added a Violence warning. It's not graphic, though.

Currently on hiatus. See profile for more information.



Categories: Post-Hogwarts Genre: Warnings: Violence

Word count: 7091 Chapters: 4 Completed: No
Published:
10/18/06 Updated: 12/08/06


Homework Excuses by bajab
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 21]

Summary: Remus Lupin is sneaking out at night, and the other Marauders want to know what he is up to, so what do they do? Follow him of course. An Early Marauder's era fic


Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 2807 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
12/05/06 Updated: 12/07/06


Summary: For Lord Voldemort, life is going swell, and everything is juuust peachy... until a ghostly visitor arrives. EXTRAORDINARILY silly.

EDIT: For some bizarre reason that I can't fully comprehend, this story WON the "Things that Go Bump In The Night" challenge in the Winter's Tale Challenge.


Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: Character Death

Word count: 1224 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/28/06 Updated: 12/07/06


A Thousand Words by annie
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 1740]

Summary: For the rest of the Ministry, the interdepartmental challenge was merely a failed attempt to restore trust between workers. But for Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger, it was the catalyst for an unexpected relationship built on passionate letters, concealed identities, and secret meetings – and the beginning of an end that neither of them could ever have imagined possible, not even in their wildest dreams.

Post-war. Based somewhat on the story of the Phantom of the Opera. Also contains R/Hr, so don't read if you can't stomach that ship.

Status: Complete. Thanks for reading, everyone!

Categories: Hermione/Draco Genre: Warnings: Character Death

Word count: 108974 Chapters: 35 Completed: Yes
Published:
04/11/05 Updated: 12/06/06


Summary: Past Featured StoryWhat does Lord Voldemort do in his spare time? Well, that's an excellent question. Who would have known that the Dark Lord has a blog? (He also has a loyal following of readers, most of whom are Death Eaters and who post their comments.) Voldemort dispenses advice on everything from murder methods to germ protection to Power Rangers to shoes, and gives an account of the life of an evil overlord. But is he posting too much personal information online? And will Harry read it and find out more about the Dark Lord than Voldemort ever intended? Read and see.


WARNING: Extremely OOC behaviour from almost all.


RUNNER-UP in the 2007 Quicksilver Quills Awards for Best Humour fic! Also nominated like 21 times, because apparently my readers are as insane as I am!



Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 12002 Chapters: 6 Completed: Yes
Published:
09/23/06 Updated: 12/04/06


The Second by Slian Martreb
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 14]

Summary: Per Sirius: Until of course the first full moon after that in which the lot of us woke up at the crack of dawn sort of sprawled in our usual spots around the Shack, except for me and Remus, who had in fact ended up in a sort of tangle. I didn't kiss him until the wolf was entirely gone, you understand, but I don't think anyone had ever been that close when he came out of a moon and was back in his right mind and yeah. Bloody hell. Toes. Curled. James threw a shoe at my head and threatened the hose. Bah. He was just jealous.

Categories: Remus/Sirius Genre: Warnings: Sexual Situations, Slash

Word count: 935 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/19/06 Updated: 12/02/06


Hollow by wicked angel
Rated: 6th-7th Years [Reviews - 25]

Summary: Harry returns to Godric's Hollow and finds more than he bargained for.

Categories: Same-Sex Pairings Genre: Warnings: Character Death, Sexual Situations, Slash

Word count: 5061 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
11/19/06 Updated: 11/28/06


Summary: A look into the life of Voldy's pet snake, Nagini.

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: Alternate Universe

Word count: 7566 Chapters: 7 Completed: Yes
Published:
05/01/05 Updated: 11/05/06


Decoy by slipstick
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 59]

Summary: Somewhere in the multivers lies a time line on which Dumbledore chose a different strategy. Harry is sent to school in the U.S. and an American muggle-born to Hogwarts. Our story begins about the time of Harry's eleventh birthday

Categories: Hermione/Other Character Genre: Warnings: Alternate Universe, Character Death

Word count: 27211 Chapters: 18 Completed: Yes
Published:
10/21/05 Updated: 11/04/06


Summary: Three-year-old Draco goes trick-or-treating for the first time. His mother takes the opportunity to teach him some lessons and Malfoy family values that she believes will be important to her son later in life. This depiction of Draco is VASTLY different from the version of him that I write in "The Dark Lord's Blog."

Ridiculously short one-shot.



Categories: General Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 983 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
10/26/06 Updated: 10/29/06


A Happy Hogwarts Hanukah by Darth Sirius
Rated: 1st-2nd Years [Reviews - 44]

Summary: Why should Hogwarts celebrate Christmas every year?

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1009 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
10/18/06 Updated: 10/25/06


Shattered by thesmilethatsaddens
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 6]

Summary:

She never thought she could feel this much pain.
He has felt that kind of pain before.
A lake was
Thought as the savior.
The real savior was him.
Even through pain,
Real love can be born.
Everyone gets a second chance.
Damage can be repaired.

Categories: Hermione/Other Character Genre: Warnings: None

Word count: 1986 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
10/08/06 Updated: 10/23/06


In A Nutshell by hearyoume
Rated: 3rd-5th Years [Reviews - 51]

Summary: Dumbledore is going senile, Ron's eating is out of control, and poor Hagrid... will he ever realize his true strength before he kills someone?? This starts off at the beginning of the school year and ends with a detailed account of how Harry finally defeats Lord Voldemort. I poke fun at stereotypes and clichés in fan fiction, and even joke about some things in the actual books. It’s pretty much everything – in a nutshell (or is it nuthouse?).

Categories: Humor Fics Genre: Warnings: Violence

Word count: 2765 Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Published:
10/15/06 Updated: 10/22/06


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