MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!
(Signed) · Date:
02/05/17 11:59 · For:
PS I don't know why half the above is bolded. HTML. HTML code. Sorry. Not redoing it. Nope. Sorry if you thought you got another review, boo. Good job, though.,
Author's Response: Good job is a review! Writers are needy, we take what we can get. ;)
(Signed) · Date:
02/05/17 11:57 · For:
So I read this three times and I kept coming back to it. I read stuff like I watch movies. I read or I watch, I take notes. I come back and have to start all over again. This, by the way, is not the way someone should go about doing things.
I asked someone once why someone would bother writing Next Generation if not to have a clean slate. (You know me well enough to know that is me asking a legitimate question, this is not me being mean.). I think, and I wasn't altogether sure at first, which is why I read this three times to be sure, you've answered my question. Maybe.
Let's take this piece so I can show you what I'm talking about. You take a simple idea, and you patch up the holes in the wall with reasonable, small gestures of magic. Some writers, and I used to do this myself, insert magic blandly without explaining why it needs to be there. With you, and I've learned this both as seeing you as a beta and a writer, you place these things in so they are almost natural, necessary things that you don't have to think about because they blend in so well they are there without being there.
I have NEVER seen that done so respectfully in HP fanfiction before. (I swear to God sometimes you have me thinking How in the hell does she do that? There it is...again .
Your stroke of genius that I didn't realize it for what it was until the second read? Again, your putty knife thing. The threstral-carriage ride send off? Never EVER would have thought of that. (I stole it as a thing in one of my pieces. I give credit. You are secretly brilliant.) Iam kind of annoyed that Lily kind of skipped out on it, really. I already don't like her name.
You know why I don't like her name? Side tangent. I have a cat called Luna and my sister has a dog (although I call it a different whatever) called Lily. Lily ... is Lily. Neither, by the way, are a nod toward HP. I doubt my sister ever read Harry Potter.
So ... nice. I have to say that I like that this Lily gives authority the hand gesture and then like hides behind the grandparents. Classic move, kid. Runneth to Grandfather. Or whatever. I like that she toys with the Scamander kid.
I was confused and I have to admit this was why I stopped. I kept telling myself that Blaise is the same age as Harry. And that ... got weird. In my head. I was thinking why would this girl does this? Paige? Paige. Why we doing this, Paige? This girl is obviously being played so WHY is so stupid? Like the horror movie. Don't go inside, girl! Girl, you SO stupid.
Beccause she's a girl being played, you stupid. *facepalm* Forgive Jenn. She dumb. I love the nod to Blaise's mother, who I call "The Wife of Bath" in HP. The Siren thing? Nice. The Wife of Bath is cooler. Sorry, JKR.
I like that you don't immediately shove these kids into adulthood since they are seventeen and left school. People forget that. You see it in Marauder tales. Kids are still kids. Adults do something stupid without thinking. Lily Luna (the name...) is still a litlle girl. She's ready to move on, yet she's not quite there.
That's what I read into the thestral-carriage ride thing. How's that for deep thinking first thing in the morning, eh? Yep. *clears throat* I'm kidding.
Well done, Paige.
Author's Response: Thank you! You can bold, italicize, or underline anything you want. I'm just happy you read and enjoyed the story. :) Thank you for liking the Thestrals carriage ride send off for seventh years! I'll have to hunt for the story you used it in.
I like writing Next Gen because I want to know what HP characters are like as parents, what their children are like, what personality traits the kids have in common with their parents, how they're different, how their view of the world differs, and too many other things to list. As for what Lily saw in Blaise, well, he's gorgeous, he treated her like an adult (I never considered myself a kid at eighteen. I don't know any older teens that do), and he's gorgeous, lol. Wizards and witches live a lot longer than Muggles (when they're not killed off) so age gaps aren't as big a deal. Even in the Muggle world, there are tons of famous older men who marry or have romantic partners who are much younger. Harrison Ford, Nelson Mandela, John Cleese, Anthony Hopkins, etc, etc, etc. The phrase "age ain't nothing but a number" is actually true for some couples, wizard or Muggle.
Thank you for always making me do some deep thinking before responding to your reviews! ^_^