Hi Georgia! This is nice for a first poem. It flows well, and the ending--"I will keep watching, I will keep waiting. It will come back, I know it will" is a little bittersweet. The poem is very...what's the word...stark, which makes it seem more urgent. Just one crit--I do think it could use a little more description; a few more adverbs/adjectives would add to the feeling.
Looking forward to more poetry of yours!
Oh yeah, by the way, sorry for giving you a heart attack with that poetry duel thing...You did a good job there too :) Actually I guess I'm not sorry...
I think you have a very good start for your first poem. :) I like the simplicity of it that allows the emotion to really shine.
I only wish that last stanza was a little longer and more complete. Perhaps with a message to tie it all in. Perhaps like, "Til then I'll keep waiting,/Endlessly waiting for what I seek."
Other than that, very nice. I look forward to more poetry from you.
Author's Response: Thanks Nagini. I did add a few lines now. I agree, it did need a little more at the end. -Georgia