Reviews For Laid to Rest
Reviewer: Equinox Chick
Date: 12/08/13 11:35
Chapter: Epilogue

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111

You killed Michael *sad face smiley inserted here* - Oh, I really wan't expecting that. Right until the end I was hoping that there'd be a 'Ta-Da!' and Michael would appear because it had all been a trick. -sigh- You didn't 'Make it so' Number One.
>
Great story. Sorry again for not reading and reviewing earlier (nano eats into your life, I'm telling you) ~Croll

Author's Response:

Yeah...confession time. From the moment I first started writing Hollow Soldiers, I knew Michael was going to die in this exact moment and for this exact reason. The details weren't clear, but the outcome was always going to be the same. Looking back at the chapter, it would've been disingenuous to cheat the ending out of what it had always been, even if I really, really wanted to.

Michael never would've been happy or at peace because what he did was always his darkest secret, the thing that kept him up at night and wounded his soul irreparably. He tried, for the sake of his son, to hide it and move on, but when you look at how quickly he embroiled himself into Adrian's situation when he could've easily ignored it, you know that even after ten years, it still drums on his mind every day.

Anyway, that's the end, and I hope you enjoyed it. Poke me if you want any extras or 'what happened to this guy' stuff. You know I always have about ten times more story than ever makes the page, so if you're interested, you know where to find me. *hugs*

~Jess

Reviewer: Equinox Chick
Date: 12/08/13 11:19
Chapter: Chapter 5

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jess, so sorry this has taken me so long to r and r. No excuse except ... No, no excuses.

The tension here held so well. I was reading and gasping at the same time - especially at the rescue attempt.

Your reveal at the end that his dad wasn't biologically Jack Corner, made me wibble a little, but he knows the real importance of family and he'll come right.

And now I have to read on because it's all got very very exciting. ~Carole

Author's Response:

Michael's journey was just as much about coming to peace with himself as it was helping Adrian to settle the score. I don't think he ever could've lived with himself if he had turned his back on Adrian, but he knew very well that this could happen.

Writing the basement scene was what stalled me months ago, and it was not easy to come up with just the right mix of action, plot-building, and characterisation. I hope I did all right. :)

Thanks for coming back, and I'm glad you enjoyed the story enough to nominate it for a QSQ and that these new instalments didn't disappoint.

~Jess

Reviewer: Dad
Date: 11/11/13 17:08
Chapter: Epilogue

Not a very happy story but a good ending.

Author's Response:

Michael's story was never a happy one in my series, but I think he finally got some sort of closure by what he was able to do for Adrian because he found it within himself to admit what he'd done and maybe even forgive himself a little bit for it. And it was important to show that Adrian understood why Michael did what he did and honour that sacrifice by making sure that Garrett had a home and a family.

Anyway, thanks for reading. Nice to see you around again. :)

~Jess

Reviewer: xxbabewithbrainsxx
Date: 11/06/13 14:13
Chapter: Chapter 5

OMGNOOOOOOOOMICHAELLLLLLLLLL!

Wow, this was a great chapter, Jess :) I've been a crappity reviewer and have just been reading as you've posted, but I have to say well done for the QSQ win and an even bigger well done with this chapter. It was tensely written and teh action was executed beautifully too. The twist about Travers...I don't think you mentioned it to me, because I was so shocked D: That ending (even if I knew it was coming) seriously broke my heart. I won't say much more, though, in case anyone checks teh reviews before reading or anything.

I think you did a great job of giving Michael the closure he needed as a character, and after everything you put him through, he got a great (if not very sad) ending. :D

Lovely job! I can't wait for the epilogue.

Author's Response:

I knowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! D:

I took a lot of time working through the action, both to make it realistic and to make it both fluid and relevant at the same time. As for the Travers twist, I had that in mind the entire time, but I thought there should be at least one or two surprises in store for your enjoyment, so I let you find that one as a reader.

In the end, I needed Michael to say it with his own mouth that he'd killed Miles, and not just to someone who wanted him to keep it a secret. He said it because he'd finally accepted that it was a part of who he was and moved on at that very moment from it. In that, also, he understood more about family and responsibility than he had in years and knew that Adrian was worthy of his sacrifice.

Looking forward to your thoughts on the next chapter!

~Jess

Reviewer: minnabird
Date: 11/03/13 11:10
Chapter: Chapter 5

Ahhhh! You can't just leave it like that!

(I gasped out loud more than once at this chapter, haha. So good.

Author's Response:

Luckily for you the story isn't over, then. One more chapter (the epilogue), and it shall be tied up with a neat little bow. I'm still toying with the idea of writing a bit more about the Perry/Cece/Jack love triangle, but that's a story for another day.

Glad you enjoy the story. It's nice to know someone does. :)

~Jess

Reviewer: Equinox Chick
Date: 04/01/13 7:08
Chapter: Chapter 4

OOOOH - this is getting even more intriguing. Someone knows Michael did it - eeeep. I'm wondering who the five are now. Or perhaps it's all a red-herring and it was someone else who saw what went on. (Don't make it Draco, he needs to be redeeemable enough for some hot smokin' Drarrryyyyy)

Ah ha - I know why you wanted to know about card games now - hehh heh heh. PLEEEAAASE keep writing this. I love it! ~Carole~

Author's Response:

There was always going to be someone who knew about what Michael did other than his mother. That was one of the points I knew had to be addressed in the story. On the rooftop, there were four attackers: three of the cousins, and the Death Eater, who will be revealed very, very soon, as well as other telling things, so stay tuned. And no, it definitely ISN'T Draco, mostly as a point of professional pride. That, and I don't think Draco would give a damn either way about Miles, Adrian, or Michael.

I incorporated card games for Michael because it's something that reminds him of a time he was happy in his life that could keep his hands busy while he was trying to shrug off the shakes and the cravings of overcoming addiction. And really, one of the most common coping mechanisms of drug addiction recovery is replacing an unhealthy habit with a benign one. I also found that downloading an electronic version of whist was the easiest way to learn to play it, lol. Instructions are like boggarts for me, I swear.

Anyway, thanks for reading, and the next chapter will be up in the next day or so. ♥

~Jess

Reviewer: Equinox Chick
Date: 04/01/13 6:53
Chapter: Chapter 3

“But Uncle Terry’s bent.” hahhahahahahhahahah - I died at that line!

Ughh, so sorry I've only just got back to reading this, not just for you, but for me because I really love the plot of this. I particularly liked the introduction of Harry here. Ha ha - he was very easily enticed into ignoring the budget committee, typical Gryff, rising to the bait - heh heh heh.

Oh Lordy, that dream sequexnce was gripping. I loved the way you did that because it not only helped me sort the other stories in my mind, but felt very dreamlike.

Why does this have so few reviews? Really puzzled here. ~Carole~

Author's Response:

Welcome back, my solo reviewer!

I really didn't want this story to be all darkness and drama, because it needed to show that Michael, for all that's happened to him, has found some modicum of happiness with his son before this incident shook things up. And really, I think Michael's done a good job so far, considering he's been alone the whole time. Plus, you remember Terry the Bent from THH, I assume. XD

The budget committee is one of the things I thought would be a necessity in the post-war economy, and I did delve a little into why it exists. Adrian, as a Ministry employee, would've had his own run-ins with it, and it's obviously the bane of Harry's existence. And when you work in a corporate-esque environment long enough (it's been ten years for Harry), it's hard not to let such concerns take over your thought processes. However, Harry being Harry will always say to hell with it and do what he knows is right. Of course, it ends up saving their lives and will probably get him out of some of the trouble.

The dream sequence makes sure that the reader knows for certain that Michael's demons are still at large in his head, even though he can live with them now. And of course, being around Adrian is like poking a beehive when it comes to Miles. That doesn't help. :/

I'm so glad you're enjoying the story. It doesn't seem like many have, so it's a relief to know the story isn't bad so much as looked over. One can never be too sure with a rather lacklustre response. Thanks for stopping in!

~Jess

Reviewer: Equinox Chick
Date: 03/16/13 7:30
Chapter: Chapter 2

EEEP. No, Adrian won't like it.

This is a cracking story, Jess. I'm enjoying all the twists and turns and the very intricate nature of the legal plot. I thoroughly approve of the wording issue - largely because I used that same trick in a story of mine heh heh - and also approve of Hermione being part of this. Having Adrian as Head Boy only adds to his characterisation as a decent Slyth who Hermione respects and seems to get on well with. I hate to think what is going to happen when Adrian finds out that Michael killed Miles. I'd totally forgotten that it was after the battle, and whilst I do remember thinking he deserved it, it must still weigh so heavily on Michael's mind. I suspect that as a Ravenclaw, he prided himself on clear thinking rather than acting rashly, so it must be all the harder for him to bear.

One incredibly minor pick, a brit-pick - is your use of the word 'fellow'. Whilst it is a valid word, it is something that in BE is quite archaic - it's kind of an upper-class 1920's word - and I think Michael would be more likely to think 'man'. He wouldn;t think 'bloke' I wouldn't go that far - ha. It's something I've noticed in a few American written stories, so it's very probably a word you use far more than we would. But, as I said, it's a very minor thing, despite me saying so much in this review about it :)

Can't wait for the update, so get writing.

This should have more reviews.

Croll

Author's Response:

Eeee, I almost don't know what to do with reviews for this story. I just kind of resigned it as something that would just go ignored. :/ Anyway, this story had to have a plot, because Adrian and Michael meeting otherwise would've just been an indulgence on my part. For the final chapter of one of the most intense series I've ever written, it deserves better than merely to exist. And of course, Samuel is a complete bastard and so WOULD set his greedy cousins on Adrian.

I included Hermione because she's someone who both Michael and Adrian would respect. Also, we both know she would work tirelessly to get this taken care of. I do feel bad that Miles would have to be exhumed, but I demand (for myself, mostly) that it be as respectful as possible. Poor Adrian.

As for the possibility of Adrian finding out what Michael did, you shall have to see, muahahahahahaha! I do have the story mostly written and mapped out, so I know exactly what is going to happen. Whilst I can't spoil it, I can say that there will be a measure of closure in this story befitting the final instalment of a multi-part series.

I shall poke at the text and see if I can fix that word. Really, it was the first to pop into my head and is something I might've said out loud. I'll see if I can come up with an alternative.

Thank you, Carole, for stopping in. This is no longer That Story With Zeroes, so thank you for that, as well. I'm glad you're interested in the story, and a new chapter will be out Monday morning. :)

~Jess

Reviewer: Equinox Chick
Date: 03/16/13 6:37
Chapter: Chapter 1

OH OH OH! Sorry, only just caught up with this, but I'm intensely interested. Mwahahahahahaha snarky Slyths and snarkier Claws - just my thing. Okay, crappity review, but must read on.

(Ughh, I can't remember Adrian marrying and having a daughter. My memory is SHOCKING!) Crollllll

Author's Response:

Crollll in the dungeonnnnnn!

Yeah, me writing plotty fic again...when will I learn. And yes, since Dust to Dust happened, Adrian did find himself a nice girl and managed to procreate. I wanted to give him a slice of happiness, and most of all, some reason to not want to put himself in danger because of Samuel's propensity for being an asshat.

Anyway, on to your other review. :3

~Jess

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