Good, as far as it goes. I felt that it needed to go a bit farther, maybe, and I'm not sure about Rita's motives. If she just wanst to get information from him, why does she choose to sleep with him? And if that's what she giving in exchange for the info, why did she threaten him?
Author's Response: Rita wanted information about Rookwood who was the person in the trials Harry saw in the Pensieve, that Ludo was accused of handling messages for. Basically she would have revealed his penchant for uniforms and Muggles in The Prophet if he didn;t co-operate. She slept with him because she wanted sex, and found the arragement mutually beneficial.
You're right though, this didn't explore deeply and could have said a lot more, but I was scrabbling for a deadline and finished it with around 5 minutes to spare before the comp closed. No excuse, really, and I'd delete, but the story and concept make me laugh. Thanks for the review. I have written far far far better stories, so I'd hate you to think this is typical. ~Carole~
Cute! I had a feeling she was undercover, but I loved the reveal with the quick Apparation, hee hee. How very in character for her. And it was neat to see Ludo at an earlier age and in the prime of his career.
Nice ending too. ;)
I am envious you pulled off six - good luck!
Author's Response: Mwahahahah - yeah, I did have half of this written because it was going to be my SBBC music drabble entry (Lovely Rita, meter maid), but then it just didn't seem to work as a drabble because there's obviously some history between the pair of them. I would have liked to go into more depth but did not have time. I was literally finishing this five minutes before the comp closed. Maybe I should make this chaptered when the comp's finished ... hmmmmmmmmm.
Thank youuuuu ~Carole~
I think you should develope your characters more. That could make this a good story. Romance is not all about fluff.
I will envelope you within my arms if you do develope it more. I just hope there won't be any antelopes in it. Or cantaloupe.
Author's Response: but but but this is flufffyyyyyyyy and wufffyyyyyy and not at all rufffffyyyyyyyyy
Thank you so much for your erudite critique, person of indeterminate gender, I will take on board your wondrous suggestion and develope this even more.
I believe the cantaloupe will come in handy, and will the antelope as both could make Rita's hair curl even more.
Ah, expecto_patronuts I adore thee.
I absolutely adored this piece! At first, I did wonder why Rita Skeeter had an accent and everything, but it was interesting how the story unwound. I didn't trust her, of course, I knew she was digging around for news.
Now that I re-read, I can see that all the advances she made on Ludo was intentional, ha! And what she said in GoF made me wonder too, and I'm glad this story puts some of those questions to rest. :)
I loved Bagman’s characterisation. I could pretty much recognise him from the books. Rita turned into her old self towards the end, and she amused me quite a bit!
This doesn’t look last minute at all. It’s short and sweet, and doesn’t feel rushed. You are very gifted, Carole, I couldn’t produse something as awesome in the last moment, no matter how hard I tried. There is perhaps a typo here or there, but the story is really good on its own. I love your writing style too. :)
Sorry, this isn’t much of a review… but I really enjoyed this fic! I was wondering how you’d get these two together, so it was a satisfying read.
Good luck with the cotillion! :)
Author's Response: Thank youuuuuu! I will go through and get rid of the typos. This story was my sixth entry so I'm not putting it in to be judged, but I liked the thrill of getting it completed. I did have half of the story already written as it was a drabble I wrote but never used anywhere, so I expanded and added around 1k, so it wasn't that last minute. Glad you enjoyed it, anyway. ~Carole
Ahahahaha, this was hysterically good! I loved the use of the song, and the canon link. When I set that prompt, I didn't really expect anyone to be able to turn it into a coherent plot, but you've pulled it off masterfully. I love that Rita must have done enough digging to find out about Ludo's thing for Muggle girls, and that she chose to be a "meter maid" of all things. It's so perfectly bizarre that it had to work!
Ludo was just as I'd imagine him at that age. Being patronized and pushed around by his father, already losing so much money, falling for such simple tricks from Rita -- I would have pitied him if you'd given me time. That was the thing, though. This moved along at such an entertaining pace that I didn't have the time to do anything but squee.
Oh, and as Natalie said, strangely sexy. Fab, fab, fabbity fab :)
Author's Response: hahahhahahahah - Thank you so very much for the review. This was very silly especially as I was still writing it at 7:45 this morning, but I had some fun with it. I have to say that I've always been interested in that line of Rita's to Hermione. She knew, obviously, that Ludo had been suspected of DE involvement, but that's not 'haircurling' exactly as he was freed, so i think she knew much more. Thanks again ~Carole~
I'm finding this sexy. I think I need help.
Author's Response: Black. Lace-Up. Shoes.
Argh! Bloody Rita Skeeter! :/
Author's Response: Hahahahahahhahahaha - yeah, this was pre-her beetle days, obviously. Thank you!