I loved this, and it's a different take on student/teacher fics than what I've come across before. I liked the way you spread this out over several years, and didn't go for any cliches of love potions, detentions etc and made their relationship seem natural. The connections over domestic abuse would obviously draw them together. I think you handled that topic really well, when it can be quite hard to write about. I thought it was good that you didn't say that Marcus necessarily abused women all the time, and so avoided the stereotype of him being exactly the same as his brother (I hope that makes sense).
I loved all the secondary characters and side story lines in this, especially Dorinda and how Charity in a way turned her life around. I loved how you depicted Charity as the kind of teacher who really cares for her students and tries to help them personally as well as in class... she just generally seemed like an awesome teacher.
I thought you drew the canon events into the story really well - they're not the focus obviously, as they are in the books, but those events would have had an impact on the whole school and I think you showed that well. I also liked your inclusion of canon characters, like Remus, Percy or Fred and George.
I think I've read another one of your stories that describes Oliver's back story in more detail, but it worked self-sufficiently in this. His father's abuse really shows why he would be so fanatical about Quidditch.
I thought Charity and Oliver worked really well together as a couple... I don't know whether they would last a long time, but at this point, Charity was still struggling with her past relationship with Jonah, and I think being with Oliver would really help her with that. While she seems quite mature as a teacher, I think in some ways she is still quite immature and it would be interesting to see how they both grow up together and how much they change.
Anyway, I really loved this whole story.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review. I have been wanting to write a teacher/student romance for a while now but wanted it to be un-icky and not featuring Snape - ha ha. For some young teachers, it must be hard teaching kids who are only a few years younger, so i wanted to capture that. I'm glad it worked for you.
Regarding Marcus, I don't think he was an abuser like Jonah was. He might have had the same upbringing and been tempted to act in a similar way, but although he did lash out and didn't treat Dorinda at all well, my intention was that he wasn't a controller in the way Jonah was.
Oliver's backstory is written about in more detail in Drowning, not Waving and also a story called 'Footprints in the Sand' - However the stories aren't linked because in those, Oliver's gay, but I like the background for Oliver's obsession with Quidditch so kept it in.
I agree that Charity is quite immature. There's a part of her still in limbo after Jonah left, so she's essentially still seventeen. I think that's why her and Oliver connect together. Will it last? I would like it to, but she dies. Charity's death seems to be upsetting me more than the other deaths these days. I've become rather attached to her - sigh -.
Thank you again for the lovely review - Carole-
I quite enjoyed this story. It was plausible, and kind of fun to see familiar events from the books, like Harry's first quidditch match, from a different perspective. You stayed true to the characters and made Charity a very dimensional, and pretty much original character. That interested me especially, since the OC in my stories is a Muggle Studies teacher, too.
Author's Response: Thnak you very much for the review. I like writing alternate views of canon and fitting them in to the actual events, which was why I decided on those particular years at H/W rather than the window afterwards when Oliver had left school. I appreciate the review - thanks again. ~Carole~
Alsdjflajijfa baahhh! I don't even know how to convey what I am thinking into words right now, so please excuse the discombobulated review to follow.
I do tend to stray from teacherstudent relationships, as I find them either unrealistic or cringe-worthy. You have turned the whole concept on its head.
Oliver is wonderful. You've given him such a real maturity through his goal of taking care of his mother, that his outbursts and hotheadedness regarding Quidditch aren't irksome to me at all the way I sometimes find them to be in the books (Whoops -- is it a sin to say Oliver Wood worked my nerves a bit?)
You've written Charity with such understandable vulnerability that it is easy to see her begin to harbor a crush for Oliver. Though I have to admit that I briefly championed a Remus/Charity twist.
In short, this was wonderful. You have so much intricacy crammed into five parts that I feel I just read a novel's worth of information! I even felt like I learned from her Muggle Studies class! Great job, yet again.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the lovely review. I'm glad you didn't find the student/teacher concept to be too icky because it's one of the reasons I tend to shy away from it. (That and they always seem to involve Snape). Charity/Remus is something i've thought about in the past and there's a chapter in one of my chaptereds where they become close.
Oh, I do like Oliver, but I agree he's so obsessed in the books with Quidditch that sometimes I want to shake him. But I now have fairly secure canon for his motivations which involves his parents, and so I suppose I like him a lot more now - ha.
Thank you again for the lovely review. ~Carole~
i loved it :)
Author's Response: Thank you very much ~Carole~
All right, I won't go on about Remus and Charity this time. Sorry about that. And I can't, because I liked Charity and Oliver too much. I'm glad she decided to go for it. On one hand, it did strike me as I finished that at times he was a bit young and immature for her...but at other times, they had a lot in common (abuse, Dementors, etc.) that they could relate to on the same level. Plus I'm sure he'll mature quite a bit now he's out of school. And, well, he's just hot!
I thought you wrote the leaving very well. I don't live with the kids I teach and I just send them off to the next school when they're done with mine, so I imagine it's quite different in a boarding school when you send your students into the real world as young adults. It was very moving. And the brief mentions of Remus were very sad. Using him was a good way to ground the story, btw--it's not about Harry so we don't need all his PoA adventures (and they were probably pretty hush-hush anyway) but it was just so nice to see a character we're more familiar with join us in the story.
I really loved your Charity, but you know that from your other stories about her (still love the one with the rock star!) And again all the supporting players were great too. The story built nicely through the years, which was necessary, I think, to make it believable. It's just too bad it went over the word count for the challenge. :(
Lovely little tale. I daresay reading your stories may bring me out of not writing anything since the Cotillion closed (I know, I know - that was only five days ago but still, lol)
Still have more to catch up, but I will. And don't worry about a responding right away. Take an hour or two. ;)
Author's Response: I'm going to reply now because I've just thought of something :). My feeling with Oliver has always been that he's quite mature because of his background and determination. With Charity in this story, she was still affected very much by the relationship with Jonah (she hadn't seen anyone else which was what Septima was getting at) so at the age of 24 she was still quite locked in teenage feelings - hence the crush when someone paid attention to her. I think she also realises it could just be a fling; Oliver is about to start a career as a Quidditch player, and she is still a teacher. They both have some growing up to do, and might grow apart :(
As regards writing, I've gone back to a WIP, but only went back to it today, so you're not alone.
Thank you very much for all your reviews for this story. It is much appreciated. ~Carole~
Oh. Remus and Charity. Remus and Charity.
No, wait. This story is about Charity and Oliver. I'm supposed to be rooting for them. Right.
But Remus and Charity in PoA! I LOVE IT!!!
Okay, back to Oliver. Yes, he's stil lovely. You've done a great job holding Charity back but letting her acknowledge her crush. Does Remus suspect?
Oh. There's Remus again. Oops.
Also, love your other students and Septima in particular. And how you had the Dementors affect Charity and Oliver. And the reference to cow biscuits, which I shall have to try if and when I ever make my way across the pond.
Sorry about the goofy review - Will finish soon!
Author's Response: Hahahahah - yeah, I teased a little with the Remus connection. Actually, in AA, Remus and Charity do have a brief fling but his werewolfness affects them too much :( :( :( (oh, and Tonks turns up - lol)
Certainly Oliver isn;t as keen on Remus now - ha ha ha. Sorry, giggling incoherently at this., I loved writing Remus in this chapter because he is such a lovely person. I'm sad I couldn't bring Sirius in, too, but ... well ... there you go,
I want to save Charity now. How pitiful is it that I want to write an AU just to save a character and a pairing, which is something I always swore I'd never do.
br> COW BISCUITTTTS!!!! They really aren't anything wildly special, and are actually quite cheap but they're very moreish - and Soraya agrees with me.
Thank you so much for the review. Perhaps I should wait a while before responding so I leave something more sensible. ha ha - tooooooo late. ~Carole~
PS - I love writing Septima and must find a proper story for her soon.
I thought I had read this and started reading the next chapter and was confused, so now I'm properly catching up. This was lovely. I think I already said this, but I love love how you are weaving your story into what's going on in the castle during this year. It's really well done. And the kiss...well, I know it's wrong, but I could totally picture it happening and now I'm just rooting for them to grow up so they can try again. ;)
But, having read a bit of the next chapter, I know that doesn't happen yet, lol.
I liked it! I love her and your Wood (even with his sad history) is wonderful!
Haha - your Wood is wonderful. That sounds a big dodgy, doesn't it? ;)
Author's Response: Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. I have to say I do really like weaving stories around the actual events we saw in the books, even though the timeline at certain points came close to breaking me.Hope you like the rest of the story. :D ~Carole~
The smut was so hot it killed my internet.
Oh, but the tension building up to it!What can I say? I was about to post this status on the LS "please shag please shag please shag" and then AIM logged off. >.<
This is a really, really great fic, Croll! Yes, it's sad that it is way over the word count limit and you might be taking it off the running, but honestly, you should be proud you wrote this. (I know you are :D Just saying!) I just love the characters, how you presented the Muggle Studies classes and curriculum, the smut, and of course, how these two reach there. It ties in well with your general canon of that era, but it's also a wonderful fic in its own right.
Great work! I shall be reading Lucibeth and Sean soon.
Author's Response: they did shag. You got your wish! Hahahahahahah - still dying at this review after two days. Thank you so much for all your help, reviews and giggling smexiness - hee hee.
I won't take this out of the running, I don;t think, because the sixth story I wrote wouldn't make it out of the starting blocks. (MY PRONGS I'M ON FIRE WITH MY ANALOGIES!). I don;t want Charity to die. I'm wondering if I can write Oliver rushing in at the crucial moment to rescue her from Voldypants and that fricking snake. Just .... how can someone be eaten? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
sigh. Life sucks, as Goyle would say. :( ~Carole~
I enjoyed this chapter but goddammit there's only one left and they haven't shagged yet what is the world coming to, eh? EH?
Author's Response: I have recently discovered shame, that's what the world is coming to (as no one else seems to be ;p) Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. ~Crololololololol
Okay, first of all, glad Dorinda saw sense in the end. Secondly, holy fricking Prongs! This was a fantastic chapter! You're developing these characters really well against the backdrop of familiar canon event.
And the kiss. Do you remember something I said about chemistry and biology? (well, it should have been bio, not physics ha ha ha)
Author's Response: Thank you very much. I'm glad you don't dislike Dorinda anymore. I did want to show that she had the option that Charity didn't feel she had, basically because I think Dorinda has a much tougher streak in her, and had Charity's advice in her head.
Ah, the kiss - mwahahahahahah. Mind you, Oliver is physic(al).
ta very much, o light of my life. ~Crolllllllll
I forgot to mention in the first review that I immediately recognised Oliver's hesitance about domestic abuse from your canon.
I don't know what to say, except ... this is painfully realistic, isn't it? The denial. The cycle of abuse. I hadn't expected the story to move to this direction, and I can't say I'm glad it's did. However, it has, and you have done the topic justice so far.
I am going to read on!
Author's Response: I hope the domestic violence issue works in this because it was something I'd had in mind for a while (well, you know my canon for Oliver) - Ascribing it to Charity came about because I've long had an idea surrounding that proverb. It did feel a very difficult topic to tackle, which was one of the reasons the fic went over the word count, but also I didn't want a neatly tied up 'happy-ever-after' solution to the issue because in RL that doesn't always happen. Jonah did get away with it, sadly, and maybe Marcus isn't as bad as him. Hmmm, basically I hope I haven't tied myself in knots here. I did have to move the story on in the end, so hope it doesn't end up as trite.
Thank you for all the fabulousness that are your reviews :) ~Crollllalalalalalalalalalalanza
Fantastic beginning!!! GAHHH! This is what great fanfic is all about. I was completely thrown off by the beginning; I thought you'd begun with her being abducted by Death Eaters O...O But she isn't!
Loving the characters so far, and I should say, loving to hate Dorinda. How do you manage to write this people who are so easy to despise? Hmm? Methinks you're taking inspiration from my company...
I almost wish I betaed this, just so I could leave all the comments at the parts I loved. Ugh I can't type anymore I'm going to continue reading.
Author's Response: I wish you'd beta'd it and then I'd feel a bit more confident with it.
Yeah, that first part was deliberate. I was trying to recapture some of that fear because the thing people associate with Charity is the manner of her death - sigh. Ahhh, Dorindaaaaaaaaa. Yeah, not very sympathetic, is she? (is she? hmmmmmmmm, wait and seeeeee) And she does have dark hair . . . (Croll runs away before she's hexed)
Thank you for the reviewwwwwwwwwwwwww. ~CON
The opening chapter of Deathly Hallows horrified me, but I didn't cry for Charity then. Now I'm crying. And for Oliver too.
Author's Response: I keep crying over Charity because of her really horrible death, so I've written her some stories where she has a bit of happiness. Now I want to save her. :( Thank you so much for all your reviews. ~Carole~
"“They’re skilful. Good eye to hand coordination, but a bit boring, really, and went on all afternoon.”" Oliver should watch some T20 cricket. It's all the rage now and doesn't go on for days. :D
Moving on...oh where do i even start? Absolutely brilliant chapter with so many brilliant lines...
"“I think what Septima is going to tell you, Charity,” Remus said as he pulled up a chair, “is that I used to know Black. We were at school together, as was Septima.”" What an entry, Prof.Lupin, cool and casual and matter-of-fact forever. And Charity complaining about having to teach the Gryffindor team who can't sit still.
Oliver recovered from his team’s defeat faster than she’d thought possible. Unlike last year, there was no repeat of the fury that had caused such havoc; he’d even turned up on time to her lessons, much to everyone’s amusement.
“I might need a fall back option,” he retorted when Dorinda mocked him. “Or I could fail my NEWTS this year and come back to Hogwarts like your ex.”
She smiled acidly. “Keep failing, and by the age of fifty, you might just win the Cup, Wood!”
The little detail of Harry being delighted to see Remus, Remus talking about James...this was 3rd year, right? I wish I could see a bit of Hermione Granger but then I understand the focus is not on her year.
Great great last part., especially the last couple of sentences.
Author's Response: Yes, I couldn;t really get Hermione into the story, but id have plans for her originally because I imagine her being quite annoying and correcting everything Charity tells them - ha ha. Damn, I should have included her!
hahahahah - yeah, Oliver was probably watching an interminable Test Match and should have watched a one day international. I think he'd quite like football, but be frustrated at the lack of pace in cricket.
Thank you for reviewing. ~Carole~
Fabulous chapter, Croll! I am enjoying this so much and am sad to see it nearly finished :( Gahh this is definitely one of my favouritest stories by you (I know I say this about a LOT of your stuff but damn it it's your fault for writing so well!) mainly because the characterisation of everyone present is just perfect. I love Oliver and his thoughtfulness, and I love Charity for how she very clearly has tried to shake off her feelings for Oliver but isn't able to. And I really liked how, despite Charity not really being interested in Quidditch, Oliver still thanked her for everything. She sounds like a fabulous teacher. :)
That's it, I think! Sorry for the awful review -- my brain is kinda fried right now, eep. But I look forward to the next chapter!
Oh, actually, one more thing.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE COW BISCUITS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Author's Response: COW BISCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUIIIIITTTTS! Hahahahahah, thank you so much for the review. I have adored writing this story and tried not to self insert, but the cow biscuits were too wonderful to ignore. ~Croll~
The best Oliver Wood characterization I've ever read.
Author's Response: Thank you! ~Carole~
Oliver is so hot. I love him. *heart* I think you did a great job here, Croll -- I particularly like how Charity's attraction to Oliver is very much a gradual thing and she didn't think of him in *that* way until now. Also, I was so ready to call you out on the Apparating thing -- lol -- but then it was a dream! Hehehehe.
Seriously, though, I am enjoying this so much, Carole! Only you could make me root for a student/teacher pairing -- I mean, I have nothing against it in the slightest, but I generally find the fandom!student/teacher consists of Snape putting Hermione, Luna or Ginny in detention and then he shags them with teh cauldron bubbling in hte background or something, lolol. This is far more plausible.
Well done and update soooooon! :D
Author's Response: Yayayayayay - thank you for the compliments; it means so much to me that you think this plausible. Yes, the detention thing is a little overused, and speaking personally, even with seven lovepotions, a locked dungeon, and the threat of Crucio, I still couldn;t fancy Snivellus - hahahaha.
Ha - I knew I'd have to mention the Apparating thing because someone would have read Hogwarts: A History and will be picky - hee hee - but I suspect Charity caught up in the throes of passion would have forgotten all about it.
Thank youuuuu! ~Carole~
“I pity you next week,” Septima said.
“Don’t you teach the Weasleys? They’re going to be as high as Peeves after that win.”
Involuntarily, Charity shuddered. She remembered the highs only too well.
And the crashes. ....
The Weasley twins are awesome, even when they don't actually appear in a scene.
Good chapter, the proverb now makes sense, Dorinda evokes a bit more sympathy when i hated her in the last chapter, Oliver gets more interesting day by day...opening his birthday presents, really? I would love to see someone use that excuse on Mcgonagall. Preferably from a safe distance.
P.S: Er, remember one time you began writing this great story called "The Lions of Gryffindor" and abandoned it just when the suspense was at peak? I haven't forgotten it yet.
Author's Response: *hides from Lions reference but will try and get around to it for the lovely Ruchira*
Thank you so much for the review and I'm glad you're enjoying the story. ha ha - yeah, Oliver can get away with a lot, mainly because the lateness thing has become a bit of a motif with him. (And he's Oliver Wood - sigh) ~Carole~
Ah, this chapter was well-worth the wait! You actually have me feeling sorry for Dorinda, when she was one of the characters I disliked the most in the first chapter. I love seeing the beginnings of Charity and Oliver's relationship, the little hints…you've painted characters who I really want to be together :).
Fantastic! This next wait will be even harder. xx Ariana
Author's Response: Actually, you won;t have to wait long as it's nearly set to go, I just need to tweak a little.
Thank you so much for the review, Ariana, and I'm glad you're enjoying the story.
Great background information! I was so curious about Flint in the last chapter that this was really good. I feel bad for Dorinda. The parallel to Charity's experience is striking so I hope Charity can help her. Can't wait to see what the reaction is from everyone - Snape, Dumbledore, Wood, Dorinda. Very good chapter!!
Author's Response: Ahh, you might be disappointed with the next chapter then . . . But there is our favourite Ravenclaw coming up. Mwahahahahaha. Gina, if this hadn;t been for the Cotillion, and hadn;t been about a pairing, then there would probably have been much more story (and the fic would have ended up at 50K instead of 22k) but, alas, some things have had to be skimmed over. Thank you for the review (is this 800 or 799?) ~Carole