Woooooow. Never before have 9000 words been so quick to read. You have fleshed out Lavender really well, especially her relationship with Ron ha ha ha. And the bit with Padma was nicely done. Love affairs usually have a nasty habit of taking over the narrative, but you've maintained a perfect balance between everything. Honestly, you're very a very inspiring writer!
Author's Response: Ooh, glad to hear that it didn't feel like 9000 words to you! Whenever I reread this fic, it feels like 190000 words, maybe because I know this story rather well and all. And yes, I LOVE the Won-won bit in HBP, so I just had to include it in my fic! It's just one of those things that are so characteristic of Lav-Lav. Love affairs usually don't take over too much of my stories because I'm really awkward at writing them :D But ah, sososo happy that you found balance in this fic and that the Padma bit wasn't too contrived! Honestly, thanks so much for all your lovely favulous amazing wonderful awesomesauce reviews. They mean so much to me. And I will definitely have to swing by your page and read some of your writing! I don't read enough on this site! - Nicole
OHHH, I enjoyed this. I'm a big supporter of Lavender (although I refuse to believe she died, but we can debate that later.) so I liked this portrayal because you've kept the girliness and mushiness of her from the books but haven't turned her into a complete idiot that's seen in most fanfictions I've read about her.
the back story with the horrible cousin was great, and I thought you fleshed Viola out very well. Lavender was so persecuted by her! One thing, though. I thought Viola would have a bigger part in this because you built her up as a wonderful character and then she kind of disappeared. There wasn;t really an explanation as to why she was so jealous of Lavender and wanted to be her sister. I'm not sure whether you had to cut the story down, but I was looking for an explanation. I did like their end scene very much.
The other thing I wanted to mention is that the part about them by the lake and hoiking up their school skirts and shirts. They wore robes at Hogwarts. there wasn;t any uniform, and this reads very much as fan-art canon, rather than book or movie canon. Sorry, I know that's a really miserly point, but it is the sort of thing I notice being a bit of a meanie canon fiend.
*sigh* Why did you kill her? *sob*. I hated Lavender dying in the films. I just hated the fact that after all the effort Hermione made and then Trelawney that the film decided she died. This isn;t me picking at you, btw, it's really just me sobbing for poor dead Lavender. That was a beautiful death scene, and very well written. You use a lot of beautiful imagery, very evocative.
It was interesting her having a relationship with Padma. I was expecting Parvati, but once Padma took the cards she'd made Ron I thought 'ah ha'. Their scenes together were great and I loved the subtlety you gave the relationship.
Oh, just before I go, I also adored the way you showed the Ron/Lavender relationship and the origin of Won-Won - ha ha ha ha.
Good story. ~Carole~
Author's Response: Hello there Carole :D Thank you for your absolutely lovely review! I'm really grateful that you took the time and the trouble to sit through the whole thing and then leave me such a detailed and thoughtful review; I honestly thought I wouldn't receive any feedback for this story at all on this site, given its monstrous length for a one-shot. I do agree Lavender receives a lot of negative attention both in the books and in fanfiction. My intention for this fic was not just to humanise her, but to give her a full life (might have gone too far with this haha). As for Viola, I never meant for her and Lavender to grow close in their teenage years; I wanted her to sort of drop out of Lavender's life...I mean that happens IRL with old acquaintances and the like, eh? There might be no explanations for Viola's jealousy...or there might be and you'll have to read in greater detail :) I don't tend to confirm things in my stories; that's up to the reader to make their own interpretations. And bahaha I get what you mean about school skirts and shirts. I know they were never specifically mentioned in the books, but in the movie canon they were wearing school uniforms beneath their robes...at least I remember quite clearly...since I've re-watched the films not too many weeks ago. So yeah, I had the movies in my mind when writing this. I'm glad you like the death scene. I was trying to write one that sounded heartfelt and poignant without being too angsty or melodramatic :D And the Lavender/Padma pairing just came to me out of the blue! I don't know how natural it sounded in my fic...but I'm glad you thought there was some measure of subtlety involved! Oh thank you so so much once again for your lovely review :D It's made my day! Cheers! -teh