MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!
Name: Equinox Chick
(Signed) · Date:
12/28/12 3:57 · For:
This is very sad, Ellie. Poor James alone at Christmas, but what lovely memories he has. I loved the flashback to their kiss with the frosting on their lips. And I loved the other little touches here (Lily calling her boyfriends 'boos' ha ha ha - fantastic!)
Before Natalie starts chucking hexes, I will point out that you've spelt Ben's surname wrong. Seamus is a Finnigan - not a Finnegan - (she gets very annoyed witha that one as I know to my cost -lol)
I thought the memory box was an inventive idea and I really liked how his daughter got it for him. However, I was a bit confused by his having a daughter. I quite understand how a gay couple can adopt/have a surrogate, and I'm guessing that's the case here, but Abby seemed rather detached from Ben in her note and I'm thinking she'd be grieving for him as much as James does because it's her other parent. Minor niggle and in no way detracted from the overall feel of the story which despite the sadness was very touching. ~Carole~
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review, Carole. :)
I know it's a very sad fic. I honestly wasn't going to make it that way, but with the memory prompt, and like most of what I write, it jsut happens. I'm glad you like the memories, though; I couldn't stop smiling after writing them. (and boo is something that my friend and I say a lot, so that's where that came from :))
I fixed the Finnigan bit (cue *headdesk*), Ugh, I always spell it wrong. Sorry about that. As for Abby, yeah, she was adopted. I was going to go into later Christmases (in my mind there's one where they're really sad because their adoption application was denied) but I didn't. I edited that a bit as well, and if you want you can check it out again. I'm so glad you liked it, and thank you so much for your lovely review!