I am glad that I finally decided to give your Severus & Zoe stories a try. They give the impression that you really enjoy creating this alternative reality.
It seems that you are very familiar with the behavior of three-to-four-year-olds, because your story paints a vivid picture of a pre-schooler being entirely herself. I can just see her crawling up into her father’s lap and wriggling around to get comfortable.
I love the contrast between Snape’s patience with his little girl and the flashes of his old self that we have know for so long, such as scaring students into silence and being snappish with Madam Pomfrey. He has always expressed feelings of impatience with children, and these feelings persist, as shown in the one “What kind of child chose anything for itself. Weren’t they all incapable of making rational decisions?” but he cannot help being soft toward her. These contrasts give the story its spice and keep it from being a bland stream of mush.
It is interesting to see that Snape is capable of love, that the spark is still there. We knew that he loved Lily, but did he ever love anyone else? Yes, his daughter Zoe. In the seven Harry Potter books, Snape emerges as a tragic character, and in the end we feel sorry for him. So it gives us a warm feeling to know that in your alternate universe, his heart can be stirred.
I loved the graceful writing, with awkward sentences, phrases, or word choices. There is careful choice of descriptive details, actually, not a lot of details, and that is good because it focuses our attention sharply on the behavior of the child and the reaction of the father A well-focused story is good.
Your story doesn’t have a lot of plot, of course (though it can be seen as one element in a longer saga comprising many stories); there is no big tension or momentous issue resolved in the final paragraphs, but that’s just fine. It’s just a charming glimpse of an intimate moment in Snape’s personal life. The dynamic tension comes from the juxtaposition of Snape’s stern outer persona and his much more human inner persona, revealed by the stream of his unspoken thoughts.
I never read Severus and Zoe before because I am not a fan of romance and assumed that Zoe was an adult. I will have to go back and read the rest. You have captured the essence of a child well. I am reminded of my own children and grandchild.
I liked the story. Nice interaction between father and daughter.
Save the fairies! This is a very interesting story. I hope to read more between Snape and Zoe.
Author's Response: Thank you for your review! There should be more to come... Keep an eye out!
I can't let a fairy die! And this was a nice read. Should I look forward to more installments? I hope so!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review! Yay! A fairy is saved! Haha. Yes, you can expect more in this series. I have several installments written. Be sure to have your author alerts activated and you should get them as they are validated. Thanks again! MetamorphmagusLupin