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Reviews For Never Let Go

Name: Ginny Weasley Potter (Signed) · Date: 03/15/13 16:02 · For: Prologue
Hey, Nadia!

Well, I have seen this story from the stage where it was just a plot, and I definitely count it as one of the best plotted mysteries that I’ve read around here. I am, as you know, aware of how the whole story unfolds, but just so I don’t spoil it for the rest of your readers, I will comment on the events until now.

First of all, I love the setting of your story. It starts with a ‘balmy July morning’ after which you have swiftly woven in an array of emotions. It starts with a father-daughter tiff, which I found interesting, and then there are the overtones of grief, and I am in love with how you have portrayed the agony that Percy went through, when Fred died. And then comes this line: She came in like an angel, dressed in white robes,. It’s one of my favourites, really, because it’s beautiful how the grief slowly lifts and gives way to a happier atmosphere. But then again, this changes. It’s back to Percy’s childish worries about his daughter growing up, and it remains innocent until he goes to Lucy’s room, where everything takes a turn for the worse. And at this point, I knew, even before I read the story, that Lucy was dead, but Percy and Audrey reacting to it was very natural, and I felt terrible for them.

I think the alternating dark and light-hearted settings really help, seeing this is a mystery. You maintain this throughout the rest of the chapters, and this is what struck me the most in your story. The moods are very important and noticeable in your story, and I love how one moment, there’s fluff, and another moment, it’s back to a shocking bit of information. Also, the story is moving fast, and it feels like a roller-coaster ride while I read it. It’s nerve-wracking to stop at any point without knowing what’s going to happen next -- the only consolation I have is that I actually know what happens next (unless you’ve got something hidden up your sleeve to surprise me too). I am sure, however, that your other readers are thoroughly enjoying the suspense.

Lucy is characterised well -- even for the really small part that she has. Well, it’s rather passive, as we only hear about her from Percy, Audrey and Victoire, but she is well fleshed-out, and I can see her reflect her father in some ways. Percy is well in-character, and with the superadded pain he’s going through, I can’t help but feel sorry for him. You’ve aged him well, as a father and a husband, and when he reaches out to attack James, and blames him for being responsible for his daughter’s death, I can tell that this is something he would actually do.

We’re yet to see more of James, but I am fond of how much we’ve seen here. I can’t wait to see more of him and have a look at the plans you have for his character, actually come out in the later chapters. The situations he faces are rather complex, and I’m excited to see how he reacts to all the situations he is, and will be facing. As for Harry, I think he’s very much in-character. This is particularly well-reflected in the scene where Harry finds out about James and Lucy’s relationship. His reaction to finding out that Lucy was pregnant with James’s child is very well-done -- I love how he’s just shocked for the moment, and then is surprised at how it seems insignificant. Knowing Harry, I expect it will most probably become significant once he’s out of all the shock.

On that note, I like the relationship dynamics between the three major couples you have here: Teddy/Victoire, Percy/Audrey and Harry/Ginny. We know Harry and Ginny well from the books, and their marriage is well-written. Teddy and Victoire are very sweet; I love the honesty between them, and also of how sure Teddy is about her. Percy and Audrey’s story is fantastic, and I’m rather hoping for another piece of fanfiction where you could go into the details, because that would be very interesting.

Regarding the murder, I’m in awe of how well you’ve conducted your research, starting with the post-mortem report, to the cause of death that you have here. I appreciate everything that involves medical research, as you know, and am very pleased with all the details that you’ve included about croton seed poisoning. The most interesting part of this, I must say, is the fact that Lucy is pregnant, and that croton seeds are abortifacients. Who would have anything against her pregnancy? Who else knew that she was pregnant? Although, I can see why Percy’s immediate suspicions would be directed to James, but then, he didn’t even know that it was his child, so we’re yet to get a lead about the actual culprit. Or is James just pretending? ;) Good job there!

All-in-all, you have an interesting story here, and I can’t wait for you to write more. My only question is: would Teddy really give out all the details to Victoire? But then again, he’s just a junior, so we don’t know. She’s helping though, so I definitely won’t complain. However, I am waiting for you to pop up on AIM and ask me to read parts of what you’ve written, and I hope that happens soon.

I love this story -- and good luck with this challenge! :)


Name: Dad (Signed) · Date: 01/26/13 13:39 · For: Chapter 5: Doubts
I do not think there were any clues in that chapter, but I am sure the next one will be interesting.

Author's Response: haha you've gotta wait and watch ;). I'm sorry for the late updates by the way -- University is not as easy as I expected it to be :/

Name: Ruchira_M (Signed) · Date: 01/26/13 3:57 · For: Chapter 5: Doubts
Oh My God. Have we met the murderer yet?

Author's Response: Haha no, not yet :) I'm sorry for the late updates -- University is not as easy as I expected it to be :/

Name: baby54boomer (Signed) · Date: 01/25/13 22:27 · For: Chapter 5: Doubts
I'm sure I'm not the only reader to point out your mistaken use of "Molly" instead of "Lucy" in Harry's conversation with Teddy. Oops...make sure to correct the mistake ASAP. The mystery has been constructed too well to be left with such a blatant error.

Author's Response: Argh, I'm so sorry I didn't catch that >.< See what I was talking about when I said I didn't have much time? Hah. Anyway, I fixed it! Thank you! And I'm so glad you consider my story well constructed! It took me a lot of work to fix the plot, so I'm happy to see it paid off. Thank you once again! <3

Name: PigwidgeonHP (Signed) · Date: 01/23/13 15:46 · For: Chapter 4: Blind Accusations
Merlin's beard! This is amazing! You have to update super soon because you have left this on such a cliffhanger! I read the whole thing in about 30 minutes and was absolutely GRIPhooked! Well done

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! :D I'm so glad you liked this story so much. Your review totally made me go like ^_^. And I've already submitted the next chapter -- it should be up within a week, if it's accepted. I hope it meets up to your expectations! And thank you once again for the review, it means a lot :) --Nadia

Name: Dad (Signed) · Date: 12/28/12 11:55 · For: Chapter 4: Blind Accusations
Tense scene but we are still short of a proper suspect.

Author's Response: Hehe, you've already met the suspect. Though they aren't an official suspect yet. Harry mentions it in the next chapter. Stay tuned! :D

Name: Ruchira_M (Signed) · Date: 12/27/12 22:50 · For: Chapter 4: Blind Accusations
I have a bad feeling about Audrey not being here.

Author's Response: Aww, crap, I forgot to mention her X(. She's still in a bit of shock, and she was sitting with Molly in the living room. She doesn't talk at all, though. I'm having her snap out of the shock next chapter :).

Name: dawndragon2 (Signed) · Date: 12/21/12 12:07 · For: Chapter 3: Vials
OH come on! so when is the next chapter? I really like your story

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'll be submitting the next chapter within next week :).

Name: Dad (Signed) · Date: 12/21/12 10:10 · For: Chapter 3: Vials
I hope the rest of the next chapter will be up soon or you may want to re-word your end note.

Author's Response: Lol, it will be :). I wasn't exactly expecting this chapter to be accepted so fast, to be honest :). Now I'm writing at double the speed to finish the next chapter so I can update quickly. Thanks for the review, and I'm glad you stuck with this! :D

Name: Ruchira_M (Signed) · Date: 12/21/12 2:45 · For: Chapter 3: Vials
What? You come back after ages and ages and end like this? *fuming* (good chapter though)

Author's Response: Hahaha lol =P. I'm sorry! I'll update by next Friday, hopefully. The latest chapter is half written -- I wasn't exactly expecting this chapter to be accepted so quickly, heh. Thanks for the review! <3

Name: Dad (Signed) · Date: 10/14/12 18:15 · For: Chapter 2: Against the Grain
Do we know the perpetrator or is it some one not yet mentioned?

Author's Response: The perpetrator hasn't been mentioned yet ;). Thank you so much for the review and for sticking along with this! --Nadia

Name: Ruchira_M (Signed) · Date: 10/14/12 14:39 · For: Chapter 2: Against the Grain
Good chapter. Have a nice trip and update when you return.

Author's Response: Thank you! I've just arrived home a while back. Give me a day or two to sort out my stuff and then I'll be back with more chapters :D Thanks for the review and for the good wishes! --Nadia

Name: Ruchira_M (Signed) · Date: 10/08/12 12:54 · For: Chapter 1: On the Case
Hey you can't stop here, please update.

Author's Response: Haha no I won't :). I'll try to update this week!

Name: Dad (Signed) · Date: 10/08/12 9:54 · For: Chapter 1: On the Case
Who? How? Why? Lot of questions.

Author's Response: Hehe yes :) thanks for reviewing! :D

Name: GinnyPotter95 (Signed) · Date: 10/07/12 2:08 · For: Chapter 1: On the Case
Another cliffhanger!!!!!(I just read the latest chapter of Where are you? by the lovely Pooja)
Can't wait for the next chapter!!!

Author's Response: Haha lol ;). Will try to update soon! :D

Name: Theloonyhermione (Signed) · Date: 09/30/12 19:13 · For: Prologue
Wow! Way to leave me in suspense! I can't wait for the next chapter! And, for a few spelling errors:

I don't know if you meant to do this or not, but in your first sentence, you capitalized 'Breakfast'.

"And know you're finally speaking sense!" Audrey said happily, clapping her hands. This should be now, not know.
This was very good and kept me hanging. I can't wait to see what will happen next!

Author's Response: Thanks for the nitpick; I corrected them! And I'm glad you liked the story. :D I'm writing the second chapter right now, so I hope I'll be able to update soon.Thank you for the review!

Name: Dad (Signed) · Date: 09/28/12 10:07 · For: Prologue
Well! That was a cheerful end to the chapter. All sorts of option open here.

Author's Response: Haha, yes it was, wasn't it? ;-). There's a lot more to come, and I hope you stick around :). Thanks for the review!

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