Author's Response: Thanks? I'm assuming that's a good wow.
This story shows Remus feeling sorry for himself. He had managed some sort of a life in his students days; he had accomplished what the other students did: learning the curriculum and making some friends.
But after graduation it was hard to find work. We know that he was in the Order of the Phoenix and that he served as Professor of Defense Against the Dark Arts for one year at Hogwarts, but what else? Given his patched and shabby appearance, probably not much else.
When we see him in this story, his spirit is beaten down. And after nineteen years of battling almost insurmountable barriers, who wouldn't be discouraged? Who wouldn't fell sorry for himself? Who wouldn't use noble-sounding excuses to avoid being disappointed again? We remember how quickly he cleared out of Hogwarts in the spring of 1994 after being uncovered by Snape, without even fighting to save his position until the end of the term.
These are good lines: "I can't want things like other men. I can't live like other people."
The second sentence is true; many handicapped or disabled people don't live exactly like a completely able-bodied person.
But the first sentence is not true. We are all entitled to want, whether or not we obtain." Feelings of longing are our own possession; no one is forbidden to hope or dream. Lupin's statement that he has no right to his own feelings (ridiculous statement!) indicates his lack of self-esteem. He has internalized the negative attitudes of much of society.
The author says "He didn't [talk] for several minutes." Which of the things that Dora had said was he mulling over in his mind during those minutes? Was it really just a kiss that made the difference? Or Dora's excellent point that they were living in abnormal times that broke all the previous rules of how society functions? Her best line, in my opinion, comes right after he complains that he can't want the things that other men want or live as they do. At that point in history, no one was living as they used to do.
An excellent little story. I have seen various conceptions of what exactly persuaded Remus to seize the happiness that he had wanted all along. This one is a fine example.
Author's Response: Thank you for your kind remarks. It's been a while since I actually read this story, so I can't answer your questions right off, so feel free to speculate.
Oh, how I love some Remus/Tonks, and this is very sweet. I like the comparison to the roller-coaster and that rise and fall that is love in anyone's life really, but yes, particularly for these two. Nice analogy, and the memory of Tonks and her father is a nice addition. One thing I think might make the story a big stronger is simply to flesh it out a bit more, add some description into the diaglogue. I love the scene by the lake -- nicely done setting this after Bill's injury -- but the lines come very quickly and it's such serious subject matter. Remus is such a brooder and thinker, I think some pauses there for description might make the transition to his proposal feel less sudden. But that's only an idea. :) The fic is lovely, and my favorite part is easy to choose. This line: “It’s not about what I have to lose. It’s about what you have to lose.” I think that is right on the money, in terms of characterizing where Remus is and how he thinks about his relationship with her. He wants it because he loves her, but he feels he would be stealing her life. I love that line! Well done! I enjoyed reading!
Author's Response: Thank you for your review.
Short but sweet! The roller coaster imagery was nice. The proposal seemed a bit out-of-the-blue, but that could be very well how it happened. Nice job! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Thanks.
Oh my gosh I LOVED the beginning part, it was beautifully written!!! Great job, I would be clueless writing like that!
Author's Response: Thank you!