From the very start of this, i was drawn in. The metaphor of the ‘jilted shelf’ is so strong and evocative of Merope, that you barely need the rest of the poem. She is left hanging by everyone until she can’t hang on to life anymore.
Merope’s life and death are so tragic, and although she engineered much of the end herself - which you’ve brilliant portrayed as the ‘fetor of forbidden fumes’ - the reader still finds themselves pitying her.
There is a very real need to speak this poem aloud, or perhaps ‘hiss’ it through ‘hated lips’, and on doing that the alliteration comes to the fore.
This is stunning. I can offer no real crit because you’ve created a poem that evokes the very essence of Merope Gaunt.
Quite brilliant. ~Carole~
Author's Response: Thank you for this review! What a great surprise. :D
Very nice poetry! I think you really captured the mess that Merope left the house in, and I like thy she was stabbing at his heart. Perhaps this poem could be extended a little more- like an epic poem! But this poem is still short and sweet and to the point, which is also nice. :)
Author's Response: Thank you! I don't know if I'll ever have an epic poem in me D: I'm thrilled you mentioned those things.
What I love about this poem is the discordant and shrill imagery. I can hear it. The bangs and snaps and hissing, and it really gives the feeling of being cooped up, and the building frustration and self-loathing within Merope. I have no idea why this poem does not have any reviews yet because, while short, it immediately explodes off the page with it's vivid imagery before simmering down into the haunting second stanza.
You're so talented, Natalie. It's a pleasure to read your poetry every month.
Author's Response: Oh! I am glad it had that effect - that's what I was trying to go for :D Thanks for reviewing, and for giving us all these fabulous challenges. I wouldn't have been able to write poetry any decently if it weren't for them. <333