Reviewer: Daenerys_bella_girl
Date: 12/26/13 12:27
Chapter: Chapter 1

I liked this piece. It was great to get a look into all three of the girls' minds. Bella and Narcissa seem to both be alike in this fic, at least a small bit, because they both compare themselves to their sisters a lot. This emphasizes the difference between Ande and her sisters, since the other two are always comparing and she is more of an independent person. I think you captured Andromeda's and Narcissa's personalities quite nicely. I'm not sure about Bellatrix, because I think she'd be more lofty, but her character was pretty believable as well. There were a couple grammar issues such as commas being in the wrong place, but the mistakes didn't interfere with the telling of the story so good job!

Reviewer: Oregonian
Date: 12/24/13 21:37
Chapter: Chapter 1

This is a delightful piece, Pink Witch, and it should have received a lot more reviews. You have created a wonderful stream-of-consciousness for each of these three women who originated in the Black family and traveled in such different directions.

There are plenty of stories on this archive that are elegantly crafted with sophisticated sentences, but your story sounds as if an oral historian had simply stuck a microphone in front of each woman and pressed “Record”. And thus we get an intimate look into each woman’s mind; we see who they really are. We often observe someone else’s behavior, shake our heads, and say, “What could they possibly have been thinking?” And in the seven books of the Harry Potter series we see these women’s behavior and hear what they say, but you have taken that crucial next step, to figure out what these (admittedly fictional, but they seem real to us) characters are thinking.

These monologues ramble around, like people speaking whatever comes into their heads, but they manage to touch on quite a lot of details. They hit all the points, in a completely realistic conversational tone, with too many clever and charming sentences and phrases to list.

I certainly hope that you will continue writing; you seem to have a talent. It was very enjoyable to read your story.

Reviewer: Snidgetgirl
Date: 06/01/12 0:10
Chapter: Chapter 1

First review! Woohoo! I really loved this story. I'm a sucker for insightful stories like this. I thought that I would like reading about Andromeda the most,mbut the way you described Narcissa was great. I always thought that she had a lost identity, and you did a brilliant job describing it! I can't wait to read your ther fics, which I wll be doing now!!
Hugs!
Cailee

Author's Response: Oh my goodness!!! Thank you so much!!! I have always tried to get into the heads of the characters I have problems with, to make me like them more, and to at least understand what it is they are feeling. Thank you so very much for reading and enjoying my fics! Trust me, I love to hear what others think of my fics. Thanks again!

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Makers of Fine Wands by CanisMajor 1st-2nd Years
Ollivander of Croton arrives in Athens in 382 BC with big dreams, noneof which...
James and Me by Northumbrian 6th-7th Years
Annabel is having a bad day. Her sudden and unexpected meeting with a face from...
Tom Riddle and the Cave of Living Waters by alittletiefling 6th-7th Years
What would happen if Tom Marvolo Riddle had been adopted by well-meaning squibs?...
FEATURED
It Takes Two to Tango by lucca4 3rd-5th Years
They cannot keep doing this; it is only a matter of whose resolve will break...
In The Heat Of The Morning by welshdevondragon 3rd-5th Years
Summary: In the heat of the morning, Katie and Leanne lie in the grounds...
Can't Fight the Moonlight by Acacia Carter 6th-7th Years
A life-changing disaster at work drives Neville Longbottom to seek aid from...
The History Teacher by iLuna17 6th-7th Years
Maybe he didn’t just love history, maybe he loved being a history teacher.
white on white by Padfoot11333 6th-7th Years
Three vignettes about scars, love, and sex.
CATEGORIES