That was brilliant. Horrible! But brilliant. Well done.
EEEEWWWWWW just ewww man
I’m sorry you didn’t like the story. However, the story is appropriately tagged with Non-Consensual sex and profanity, so it was really up to you to choose to read it. If you think it’s gross or inappropriate, I suggest not reading fics like this in the future :).
If you didn’t like the pairing that I used in the story, I don’t really have anything to say. I wrote this for the Great Hall Cotillion, which was all about using pairings that you don’t necessarily like or agree with. I don’t plan on writing this pairing again in the future.
If you didn’t like the story at all, I suggest you leave some concrete advice for me to improve my writing in the future. You did no such thing, and saying something like “EEWWWW” does not make me take your opinion seriously.
I don’t normally write pairings of this nature, so I’m sorry you didn’t like my attempt. I am grateful for the review.
Hi Lily :)
I do think it's a bit of an injustice that this story has only one review :-/ The review situation on the archives generally hasn't been all that :( But, anywho, I'm here to rectify that.
I must say, I wasn't sure what to think with that pairing. I mean, both characters were ones I don't particularly like (but who does, lol?) but can definitely say that you did well with their characterisation. I liked how you described Umbridge as not pretty but as someone who stood out. That was an interesting observation to make, I think.
I wasn't quite sure about the ending. Rape, or dubious consent if that's what you consider it to be, is a sensitive issue (as, of course, I'm sure you know) and I kind of think you glossed over the matter a little.I think you could have covered what happened after the rape took place, or maybe go into more detail about *why* Amycus decided to do what he did. I think that would make a big difference in the fic.
Anyway, despite my qualms, this was certainly an interesting read, Lily. Good luck in the challenge :)
Hola, mi amigo, y gracias para en "review". That kinda ruined the whole Spanish thing, I don’t know how to say review :)
Thank you for compliments and crit. I appreciate them both. I love love love love you for saying that I did a good job on characterisation…I think part of the reason I wanted to write about this is because I don’t like either of the characters and I kind of wanted to see how I could write about them objectively.
I agree with you about the crit…all I can say is the same thing I said to Natalie…I didn’t WANT to know what happened next. Perhaps, under less time constraints, I will edit this story and add some more, or perhaps have a sequel, because I’m becoming more and more curious about the details. Which is *really* bad.
Thank you for reviewing, you made my day, because I still don’t get gazillions of reviews, hehe.
:o :o :o
First of all, I need brain bleach! Umbridge? Carrow? D: But this was so chilling. EEK. The only crit I can offer is that I found it too short; I wanted to read more from Umrbridge's side of things. But I do understand the time constraints you were working under.
Well, I enjoyed it in a horrified sort of way lol. Good luck for the challenge! :D
Thank ya, Nat, for saving me from the realms of obscurity. On to crit...the only thing I can say is that I didn't WANT to know Umbridge's side of things. Eek.
I'm glad you enjoyed it. It's probably the creepiest thing I'v ever written though x)